"I'm nervous." Meredith said as she cleaned out the wash bucket and stuck it in the closet.
"You should not be nervous. I am here." He said confidently, as he walked up and hugged her from behind. "You really do need to take a shower!" He said jokingly.
"Thanks. You keep telling me I smell. That feels great you know..." She explained.
"It's only because you always smell so good." He said as he kissed her neck. "And you usually taste good too." He said as he took a nip at her neck. "But now you taste like dirt and salt." He said with a chuckle.
"Everyone needs a little salt in their diet." She giggled.
"Yes they do." He said as he kissed her neck. She pulled away.
"I really do need to take a shower..." She said as she began he walk up the stairs. She got to the top, and looked down. "Don't you want to join me?" She asked.
"I thought you'd never ask." He said a he barreled up the stairs.
Meredith grabbed a nice pair of jeans and a long sleeved tee shirt out of her bureau. Derek smiled when he saw her grab the pink thong and bra that he loved so much. She didn't say anything as walked by and grabbed his hand, leading him into the bathroom. She could see the desire in his eyes. She walked over and unbuttoned his shirt. He slide it off. She slide her old tee shirt over her head. He continued to pull off articles of clothing, but he never took his eyes off of her. She slide off her tattered jeans. She stood there in her bra and panties. Derek just took her in. He had missed her so much. He watched as she slid her panties off and unclasped her bra tossing it on the floor.
"Come on. I just might do that bendy thing you love so much." She said as she disappeared into the steam.
"God I missed you." He moaned as he climbed in the shower.
"Me or the sex?" She asked as she stood under the water, letting it cascade down her chest. Derek moaned as he watched her.
"You, definitely you." He said with a smile as he stepped toward her and covered her mouth with his.
"Right answer." She said as she pulled away.
"I want to do dirty, dirty things to you." He moaned as he kissed her neck.
"It appears that you do." She said as she looked down at his growing erection.
"You have no idea." He said as he moved down her neck, taking her breast in his mouth. He teased her nipple until it became erect, and then his tongue trailed to the other. Her head flew back as she let out a faint moan. His mouth moved down her stomach pecking soft kisses. He moved her leg up and pushed her against the wall as he tongue traveled inside of her. Her body tensed up as he explored her. He could feel her getting wet around him.
"Oh God Derek." She moaned. "Stop..." She mumbled. He pulled his tongue out and put his mouth over hers. She ran her fingers through his hair, and squeezed his back with her other hand.
"I need you." She begged. He could see the desire in her eyes. They always turned a deeper shade of green. Derek turned her around and ran his hands over her soft breasts. He buried his face in her neck.
"Now Derek." She shouted. "I need you now!" He bent her over and entered her from behind. She moaned as she felt his large shaft enter her.
"Oh God baby." He said softly as he trust into her. He heard her yelp. He thrust harder, feeling himself grow inside of her.
"Oh, Derek...harder." She shouted. He did as she said and pounded into her harder. She pulled her legs father apart, allowing him to enter her deeper. Her clit was throbbing. She could feel her orgasm beginning to take her over.
"God you are wet..." He muttered into her skin.
"Oh!" She shouted loudly as she felt herself come to her peak. She could feel Derek releasing inside of her.
"Oh, Mer..." He moaned as he came down from his high.
"Thank you..." She whispered as he pulled out. She turned around and kissed. "That was great, but--" She started.
"But?" He said with worry.
"That wasn't exactly the bendy thing I was talking about." She said with a giggle.
"Oh?" He said with raised eyebrows. "What is this other bendy thing?" Pretending not to know. "Maybe you could remind me?"
"Maybe I could." She said with a smile as she shoved him against the wall.
----------------
This was crazy. She, the most irresponsible person in the world, was considering adopting a child. Not just any child. A child that had been through more than most people could even imagine. A child who had absolutely no family. Not to mention, she had leukemia. And now, the woman who had spent her college years drifting from bar to bar, going home with different men every night. The woman who had no domestic skills. This was the woman who was going to try and raise the damaged child. A perfect pair. Both perfectly damaged.
"It will be fine." He reassured her again. She was pacing. Pacing was something she did when she was nervous. "You're going to wear a hole in the floor." He said as he reached out and pulled her into his lap.
"This is the right thing, right? I am doing the right thing?" She asked nervously.
"Meredith, you are the most selfless person I have even met. Yes, you are doing the right thing." He said as she buried her head into his chest. "You will be a good mother..." He said softly, and somewhat sadly.
"Derek..." She said quietly. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry about everything that has happened in the last week." She told him apologetically.
"I am too." He returned as he kissed her head. "Hey, where the hell is fish-n-chips?" He said, just realizing that he hadn't seen him around.
"He went home." She replied simply. "A few days ago."
"Oh...you didn't tell me. Although communication hasn't been our best skill lately." He mentioned. "That's good, right? That he went home..." He asked as he looked into her eyes. He couldn't even come close to reading them at the moment.
"Yeah. But now that he's gone, you will have to take the brunt of the abuse." She said with a giggle.
"I think I can handle that." He returned as he brushed the hair our of her eyes.
"Maybe I should have baked." She mentioned as she stood up. "Baking is motherly."
"Mer, you need to relax. Besides what would she think when she walked in to a smoke filled house?" He asked with a chuckle.
"Seriously, not funny..." She muttered as she walked to the front window. "She's here. Oh my God, she's here!" Meredith said as she began walking nervous circles.
"You are okay. Just be yourself." He said as his pager went off. "Let me call the hospital. I will be right back." He said as he walked off. "Breathe!" He yelled from the kitchen.
Maybe I was wrong. What was I thinking? I'm not a mother. I can't do this. The minute she walks in here, she is going to realize that I am a total joke... She sighed, per Derek's order as she opened the front door warmly.
"Mrs. Baker. So good to see you..." Meredith said with a handshake. Now that is who you really are...who are you kidding? Seriously?
"Ms. Grey, or do I say doctor?" Carol asked as she shook her hand.
"Meredith is fine." She responded. "Please, come in..."
"You have a beautiful house." She commented as she looked around.
"Thank you." She said warmly. "Can I get you something to drink?"
"No, I'm fine. Thank you. This won't take long. I have another appointment after you." Carol explained as she pulled out paper work out of her worn leather bag.
"So, what do we do? I've never done this before." She chided herself for saying something so stupid.
"Well, it would be great if you could show me around the house, and then we will talk about the paperwork you filled out." Carol said quickly.
"Sounds good." Meredith said as she led the way upstairs.
"I mainly need to make sure that the basics are working. Plumbing, things like that. Of course, I need to make sure she would have a room. I saw in you paperwork that you have roommates?" Carol asked.
"Yes, I do." Meredith answered. "I am going to change the office into a bedroom, of course." She said as she opened the door. She had never seen it so clean. Before it was filled with boxes that were yet to be unpacked. Now it actually looked like it could be used.
"How many bedrooms are in this house?" She asked as she counted the doors.
"Four. George and Izzie each have a room, and of course I do." She answered. "And we have three bathrooms." She told her, trying to sweeten the deal.
"Well, everything looks okay." She said as Meredith walked her through the whole house. They ended in the kitchen. Derek walked in from the back door. Meredith tried to read his face. He didn't look upset, so that was good.
"So, the house looks good. But there are a few things on the paperwork that may be a problem." She said. Meredith's face dropped. Derek walked up and stuck out his hand.
"Derek Shepherd." He introduced himself with his signature smile.
"Carol Baker." She returned.
"Very nice to meet you. It's truly a shame, isn't it?" He said softly. She nodded. Derek sat at the counter and listened.
"Problems?" Meredith muttered nervously. She was getting clammy.
"Well, first we have to face the fact that you are single. It doesn't count you out, but it is less desirable. We want to place a child in a family. The hours you work are unbelievable. I don't know how you do it. And then there are the roommates. They would need to be checked out. We can not release a child into a home that is reminiscent of a college dorm." Carol said bluntly. Meredith looked at her, she was offended.
"Meredith is not single." Derek butted in as he walked up.
"She's not? On her application..." Carol said, pulling it out.
"She gets nervous. She hurried through the paperwork. She must have checked the wrong box, right honey?" He asked. Meredith looked as him and nodded. "This means so much to her." He explained as he pulled her close.
"No offense, but who exactly are you?" Carol asked.
"I am her boyfriend. Well, actually fiance." He spat out. Meredith's head shot up, unnoticed.
"Oh!" Carol said. "So this will be a joint adoption?" Carol asked as she looked at Meredith. Meredith looked back and forth between them in shock. She was ready to toss her cookies.
"Well. I supposed so." Meredith finally forced out.
"Oh, this changes things." Carol said as she started writing on a piece of paper.
"Actually, we are also building a house. I bought acreage earlier this year. It's by the water." Derek explained. "I have always wanted to start a family. The house was built around that idea." He said.
It went through Meredith like a knife. She could see that he wasn't trying to hurt her. It was just the way it came out. He was being genuine. She felt guilty. She had thought he was riding her about children, but now she could see it was truly important to him. It was what he had always wanted.
"Oh, wow. This house, how soon until it will be done?" She asked with much interest.
"Well, the structure should be done in a couple of weeks. It's timber framed--" He started.
"Oh, those are so beautiful." Carol said happily.
"They take a while to build. Timber and pegs, no nails. Very interesting..." Derek said with a smile.
"So this house would be temporary?" Carol asked.
"Um." Derek said with panic. He could see Meredith was completely in knots.
"I supposed so." She said quietly.
"Well, Mr. Shepherd, I will need you to fill out a packet also." She said. "What do you do for a living?" She asked.
"I'm a neurosurgeon at Seattle Grace." He explained.
"Oh. That is amazing." She said in awe. Derek had won her over with his charms.
"So are there any other familiars are vying for Anna?" Derek asked as he looked at a very concerned Meredith.
"Honestly, none. It's sad, but once they learn about the leukemia, they are instantly uninterested. People just don't want get attached to someone that may die." Carol explained. Meredith's face softened lightly.
"That's a shame." Derek returned, shaking his head.
"Of course you realize that both of you are required to take thirty hours of parenting classes..." Carol reminded them.
"Of course." Meredith answered. She felt Derek grab her hand. He squeezed it tightly.
"Well, Dr. Shepherd, as soon as you get these papers filled out, we can press forward." Carol said quickly.
"Thank you, Mrs. Baker." Meredith said as she stuck out her hand.
"Thank you both." Carol said as she shook their hands. "I will be talking to you." She said as she walked out the door.
Meredith looked over at Derek. She didn't know what to say or feel. She was worried that it wouldn't work. She didn't want to create some fake reality that was never going to be. At the moment, she wasn't sure exactly what reality was. Derek looked at ease, like he didn't have a care in the world. She had just listen to him spill out his dreams. Now he was having hope. She was praying it wasn't false hope. Maybe he didn't realize how much this was weighing on her.
Meredith quickly ran off to the bathroom. Derek could hear her retching. She flushed the toilet and took a swig of mouthwash and swished it around. She looked at the mirror and sighed. She finally came out. She slowly walked over to the sofa and sat down with her head in her hands. She felt his weight on the sofa next to her. He sat back and pulled her against him. She tensed up her body.
"What the hell were you thinking? How do you know that I want to move?" She asked angrily.
"I, um--" He stammered.
"I grew up in this house. Maybe I want to stay here!" She scolded. "What the hell are we doing? I felt like an idiot. Now you have made things sound completely different than they are!"
"Meredith, I was just trying to help." He said quietly. "I'm sorry. We don't have to do anything you don't want to. I would have anything to do with this. Just say the word..." He explained in a low voice.
"No. I'm sorry." She said as she relaxed. "But, I am not going to marry you." She said bluntly.
"What?" He asked with surprise.
"You heard me. I am not marrying you." She laughed as he wrapped her arms around her.
"Seriously?" He asked with a chuckle.
"Seriously." She answered. "Not to mention, you had a hell of a way of asking me. Because well, you didn't." She pointed out.
"Ah, you are right!" He said, he pushed her off of him and knelt down on the floor. "Meredith, will you marry me?" He asked. She began to laugh.
"No." She said as she looked down at him.
"No?" He asked with a grin.
"No. Not to mention you don't even have a ring!" She added.
"Oh." He said as he thought. "Well, we could do something about that..." He elaborated.
"Uh, the answer is still no." She said as she laid down on the sofa on her stomach. He crawled over to her head.
"It will be okay." He said and he stroked her hair.
"Maybe I am not fit" She moaned as she rolled onto her back.
"Oh you're fit. In more ways than one!" He said as he raised his eyebrows.
"You are terrible. Never ending sex machine." She added.
"You do it to me!" He whined as he climbed on the sofa with her.
"You're quite heavy you know." She said with a giggle as he started kissing her neck.
"Well then I guess you'll have to be on top..." He said as she grabbed her and flipped her around.
"I guess so..." She said as she straddled him, moving her hips strategically. She began unbuttoning his shirt. She looked down into his deep blue eyes. She could feel him growing under her. Meredith's head shot up as the front door opened.
"Shit!" She said as she climbed off of him, her hair all tousled. Cristina, George, and Izzie walked in. They all looked at Meredith in confusion, and then Derek's head popped up.
"McDreamy's back." Izzie pointed out, hoping to explain the situation.
"That didn't take long..." Cristina answered sarcastically.
"I won." George said with a smile, as Izzie began handing him cash.
"I thought you would hold out longer. I'm disappointed..." Cristina said as she handed him bills.
"God you guys!" Meredith spat. She looked over at Derek. He stood up and looked down.
"I think I need to take a a shower..." Derek said as he ambled to the stairs.
"But you just--" She started.
"A cold shower..." He said with disappointment. img Meredith said with a laugh.
"Ohh..." The interns agreed.
"So seriously..." Izzie started as she grabbed some chicken from the refrigerator. "This is great!"
"No, because now my person is in love again. She's all soft and gooey." Cristina added, rolling her eyes.
"So is that why you went home? To have crazy sex with McDreamy all day?" Izzie asked with a giggle.
"Either A, all you do is talk about sex all of the time. Or B, you reserve that for when I am around only to torture me!" George whined.
"Oh Bambi, get over it!" Cristina spat. Meredith looked up when Derek entered the kitchen.
"So, did you tell them the good news?" Derek asked.
"What good news?" Cristina said with a worried look.
"Oh my God! You're getting married. I knew it!" Izzie said happily as she chopped vegetables.
"Actually no. She said no." Derek pouted.
"He asked you and you said no?" Izzie said with shock.
"Now, that is the Mer I know!" Cristina explained.
"Well, um. It's complicated." Meredith explained as she looked at the floor.
"What is it?" George asked anxiously.
"Well...Izzie, hopefully you will be cooking for one more soon." Meredith said so quickly it blended together.
"What?" George asked.
"You may be cooking for one more soon." She said more slowly.
"McDreamy's moving in?" Izzie asked, looking at them both.
"Barbie, you are a dumb-ass." Cristina shouted. "Derek already practically lives here. Oh God, you aren't pregnant are you, because I swear---" Cristina said nervously.
"I'm not pregnant, but we--" She started and took a deep breath.
"We are trying to adopt Anna Livingston. Meredith and I are going to be parents." Derek said with a smile as he kissed her head.
"Holy shit..." They all said in shock.
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So Derek will have a big part in getting Anna, if they even get her. Can Meredith deal with that? It's a major commitment. She won't just have one, she will have two.