Surprise!

Random unexpected update!

WARNING THIS IS NOT TECHNICALLY THE NEXT CHAPTER IN THE STORY. I'm sorry for being woefully uninformed of holidays in other countries but i don't know if you guy have a thing called May Day? Well if you don't all it is basically is noone works on the first monday of May. So i got the day off school and it was sunny out so i decided to sit on my trampoline and do some writing. I got a bit of writers block in regards to the next chapter, hence this, the story of why Emmett is banned from streaking and why the queen has a restraining order against him. I mangaged to finish it today because i was off school ill and needed something to take my mind off it. So because of this i'm sorry but this chapter may not be my best. I thought you might like to see it anyway though. Enjoy!

Emmett and the queen

EmPOV

London

Later the day of the Spice Girls concert

I drove my Jeep through the ridiculously overcomplicated London streets to go pick up Jasper from the station. I had been the first to volunteer to go; naturally, I was never going to let this go so why not start having the fun now? I chuckled and began my plans, cardboard cutouts in unexpected places, photo-shopped pictures all over high school, costumes…. I sighed contentedly.

Ooooh Buckingham Palace! Jasper can wait… I thought. Hey, this place looks pretty sweet! Maybe I could get Esme to buy it and spruce it up a little, I'd always wanted a hot tub… I looked for a parking slot for a while but ended up just throwing my jeep behind some bushes. I could pick it up later.

There was a big column thingy in the middle of the square; on top of it was what looked like some shiny old dude with pigeon crap on his head. I would have to get a statue of me up there! I could change the plaque to say "Emmett the Awesome" or… "Emmett Cullen, bringing sexy back since 1915" At the bottom of the column there were a load of big metal lions. Edward would like that. I walked up to one and growled at it. I didn't get it, it was nowhere near as fun as an irritable grizzly.

"Rawr!" The lion roared back.

"What the-?!"

A little girl's grinning head popped up from behind the lion. She let out a small squeal as she slid of its back sideways and landed on the floor. He big brown eyes stared up at me from beneath a curtain of chocolaty hair as her cheeks flushed bright red. She couldn't have been much older than five.

"Hey, midget!" I joked.

"Bite me!" She scowled. Ironic. I liked this girl already. She had an American accent too so I guessed she was here on vacation.

"I'm Emmett" I grinned shaking her tiny hand carefully.

"I'm Bella, you're big."

"That I am. I live here you know" Well it wasn't a complete lie, I would live here eventually, I just had to talk Esme around. Her eyes narrowed at me, not believing me for a second.

"Oh yeah?" She challenged.

"Yeah!" I retorted

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah"

"Ooooh yeah?"

"Yeeeeaah"

"Go in then"

"I will!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"Naked"

"Na- what?!"

Her chin raised a fraction in triumph. Oh no, I was not going to let her win! It was on.

"Fine! See that window there?" I pointed to one in the middle at the top "Watch that space, you'll only see me for a second" I thought about it for a second "Can I wear a flag? I don't want to scar you for life" She nodded and I could tell she didn't believe me. She seemed pretty smart for a 5 year old.

I pulled out my phone and sent a text to Jasper.

Jasper

Might be l8 picking u up

A little girl dared me 2 streak

Twas an offer I couldn't refuse

Emmett

Swinging my legs over the high railings I ran past the guards so fast that they wouldn't be able to see me. I was going to have to get me one of those fuzzy hats. As I ran through a fancy courtyard I found a place that would be a perfect place for a trampoline! I made a mental note to tell Esme later. As I scaled the white building I made sure to peak through all the windows, I needed to know where the best rooms were to call dibs on. Swinging myself up onto the roof I had one last look around. Not too shabby! I thought. Making sure to stay out of sight now that I wasn't moving, I stripped and covered myself with my homemade Cullen family flag; I had always known it would come in handy one day. I loved that flag, it had my face on it, but no-one would let me fly it at home. My phone beeped in my hand.

Emmett

Ur capacity 4 thickness never ceases 2 amaze me

Alice saw what u r about 2 do

Not everything will go as planned

But I'm not going 2 stop u

This should be entertaining.

Edward + Carlisle r clueless.

Take ur cell and wallet

Rosalie

Wrong?! What could possibly go wrong? Shrugging, I grabbed my wallet and cell and ran over the roof to the window. Dropping down in front of it I paused, long enough to be seen by the little girl, and struck a superman pose. I saw her laugh and clap as she was lead away by her mother and lost in the crowd. Luckily, no one else seemed to have seen me, something made me think that the Volturi would not see the funny side of this. One hand on my flag and the other one the roof, I went to haul myself back up. I didn't move. What?! I'd been able to lift myself with one finger before. Oh crap, it was long enough that even humans would start to notice now. My eyes flicked down, my foot was stuck, and it had slipped down between the window and the drainpipe. I could have got it free but I thought that the humans might just notice a window being ripped out of its frame. I sighed and reached for my phone. Thwack. Dammit Emmett, Think! I told myself, don't use the hand you were holding onto the roof with! I realized that I was referring to myself in the third person, a sure sign of insanity; Alice had warned me this day would come. Currently, I was dangling by my ankle from the top centre window of Buckingham Palace, with only a homemade flag to preserve my modesty. People were definitely starting to notice. Revolving slowly in the air by my ankle I sighed wondering how on earth I was going to get out of this one.

"James, there is a young man dangling outside my window wearing over a flag. The guards ought to know, though do tell them to take their time he is rather dashing." A woman's voice sounded behind me. I pivoted to face the window and found a familiar face gazing back at me. A butler was leaving the room. I wonder if he comes with the house. Shocked I reached up and grabbed my wallet for confirmation, now I got why Rosalie told me I needed it. I pulled out a coin and examined it. Yup, same face. Not really sure what to do in the situation I attempted a bow which was made a lot harder by the fact that I was upside down. The little grey haired lady smiled back at me, but I had rotated back so I was facing the crowd now. Oh cool there were news crews and everything!!

EPOV

I lay on the couch in our hotel room contemplating the events of the day. Emmett had gone to collect Jasper from the police station and the girls had gone out shopping…again, which left Carlisle and me alone in the room. I was still recovering from the concert debacle that afternoon. Just being there had been bad enough, I felt like my eardrums had been molested.

I heard the shower turn off and Carlisle came out of the bathroom still looking a little shaky.

"I feel violated" He whispered.

"I know what you mean"

My cell buzzed and I picked it up to see a text from Emmett.

Edward

I'm having a bit of a… errrr…situation

Turn on the news

P.S. The Queen thinks I'm Hawttt

Emmett

I banged my head on the coffee table and handed the phone to Carlisle so that he could read the text. He just groaned. I really did not want to turn on the news, but a sort of morbid curiosity forced me to pick up the remote. I was greeted by an image of Emmett, almost completely naked, dangling upside down in front of Buckingham palace.

"…appeared out of nowhere" The newswoman was saying "The exact identity of the streaker is still unknown, though it is clear that he is extremely good-looking…" She trailed off, fanning herself a little. In the background they were showing slow motion footage of Emmett pulling muscle man poses and waving at adoring fans as a crane approached to get him down.

"I'll get the car" Carlisle croaked.

I could only nod. This was going to be a long day.

Before you come at me with pitchforks i can explaaaaaaain! I know Bella would have been older than 5 and the she never left she never left the country before New Moon. But I reeeeally wanted to put her in this scene and i needed her to be young enough so she wouldn't remember Emmett. Please don't hate me!

pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease review! Go oooon make a sick girl happy :) Cyber Edward Cullen shaped cookies for all my reviewers! OK grovelling over.

Love to all my review people

Hannah