Meredith laid there in a relaxing sleep. Her schedule had changed. She had been sleeping in. She had been doing a lot of physical activity lately. So she didn't wake up. She usually woke up before her alarm went off. Not today. She was dreaming. She was back in the Caribbean, laying in the beach.
"Meredith..." She heard in her sleep. She looked over to see Derek laying on the beach next to her. He looked at her with a smile. "Meredith!" Derek shouted as he shook her awake. She quickly opened her eyes and dropped her face. "Thanks..." He muttered, offensively.
"I was dreaming. It was a good dream..." She mumbled as she rolled over, throwing her face into the pillow.
"Yeah, well back to reality. The alarm went off a half an hour ago and you didn't wake up." He said as he rubbed her back. She moaned as she sat up.
"Damn-it." She moaned as she grabbed her stomach. Derek looked at her with confusion. "Way too much ice cream." She moaned. "I guess I should get up." She said as she stood up. She looked at the calendar on her beside table. She tore off the pages from the past few days. Days spent in the hot sand. Then she got to the present day. Her face dropped as she revealed the red marker. This was bad. Beyond bad. This was catastrophic.
"Holy shit!" She shouted as she ran to the bathroom and retched.
Derek looked over at the calendar. He felt like an ass. A complete and total ass. He hadn't even realized. He dragged her away, to the caribbean. It was his fault. Well, maybe a little hers. It was her idea. Anyway. He felt bad. This was bad. He rushed into the bathroom and held her hair back.
"I'm sorry Mer." He muttered as he watched her vomit.
"It's not your fault. It's mine." She moaned as she stood up, and walked to the sink. She angrily grabbed her toothbrush and began brushing the enamel right off of her teeth.
"Mer- You're going to hurt yourself." He said as he grabbed the toothbrush away from her.
"You will be fine. It's no big deal." He said as he cradled her face. He watched her face pucker. Then she let it loose. The tears flowed like rain water.
"It's easy for you to say. You passed..." She whined.
"You are the smartest intern I know." He said as he looked into her eyes. She softly pulled away and washed her face,
"I'm so screwed. It's over. So freaking over." She muttered as she walked out and grabbed her clothes.
Derek left the room. He stopped in Anna's room and gave her a soft kiss. She didn't need to be up for another hour. She looked so peaceful. For as much as she had gone though, she had adjusted well. Meredith passed her room and went straight to the kitchen. Izzie looked up with a smile.
"It looks like it's going to be a beautiful day." Izzie said brightly. Derek walked in behind Meredith and did the 'cut it out' sign. Her eyes widened.
"Beautiful? Maybe for you!" Meredith said as she grabbed the coffee pot and started to pour. She slammed it against her cup so hard she shattered the pot and coffee went everywhere. "You have got to be kidding me!" She yelled as she walked out of the kitchen. Now she had to change, her clothes were covered in coffee.
"What is wrong with her?" Izzie asked as she started wiping up coffee and cleaning up glass.
"Intern exam." Derek said flatly.
"Yeah..." Izzie said with a shrug.
"It's today. In case you haven't noticed, we spent the last few days on our honeymoon. She hasn't studied. At all." He said with raised eyebrows.
"Oh crap..." Izzie said quickly.
"Yeah." Derek said softly. "She doesn't need to study. She knows it. But her head...she doesn't believe it. She is flipping out."
"Are you talking about me?" Meredith asked as she stormed back into the kitchen.
"Of course not." Derek said quickly. "What do you want for breakfast?"
"To pass my exam." She snapped.
"You need to eat. Fuel for your brain." He said as he grabbed a pan.
"I don't need food. I need caffeine. A lot of caffeine." She said as she rummaged through cupboards, knocking things over.
"But we don't have a pot." Izzie said dumbly.
"No shit!" Meredith said. "You know, you could have told me, Iz. Yesterday, you could have said something."
"I thought you knew. We studied the whole time you were gone." Izzie explained.
"Great. Freaking great. I would say 'good luck', but it sounds like you won't need it...because you studied!!" She shouted and then grabbed a chocolate bar and began hogging it down. Then she washed it down with a soda.
"Now you're going to crash and burn." Derek said shaking his head.
"Oh. Thanks for the vote of confidence, Derek!" She said as she slumped in her chair. "Ass."
"That's not what I meant. A sugar high...I meant a sugar high." He said, clarifying.
"Whatever." She said angrily. Izzie quickly turned the news on, trying to have something to focus on.
"I hate you. And your penis. I hate your penis." Meredith said as she glared at him.
"You love my penis. And you are the one that wanted to get married right away..." Derek told her.
"Thursday. I wanted to get married Thursday. At City Hall. Not on the weekend. In the Caribbean." She said quickly. She watched his face drop. "Now, I will be re-doing my internship. Actually... no I won't. I will freaking quit!" Everyone got quiet as Anna walked in sleepily.
"Mommy! Why are you yelling, you woke me up!" Anna snapped.
"I'm sorry baby." Meredith said with compassion.
"Mommy's upset." Derek explained. "She has a big test today."
"That she is going to fail...no thanks to daddy." She said quickly.
"And in other news, the Livingston trial has taken a turn--" They heard the television reporter say. Their eyes went wide. Meredith and Derek both jumped up from the table, juice spilling everywhere.
"Turn it off." They shouted. Izzie quickly leaned over and pushed the button.
"What's going on?" Anna asked in shock.
"They were going to say bad words." Meredith told her quickly. Her heart was beating out of her chest.
"Oh." Anna said with satisfaction. "Can I have some cereal?" She asked.
"Of course." Meredith said with relief. She quickly poured her a bowl. They heard the front door open and Jane walked in.
"We need to go." Derek said as he stood up and looked at the clock. He pulled Jane aside and told her not to let Anna see the news. Meredith grabbed her stuff and they both walked to the door. She quickly turned around and grabbed a bag. The both walked to the car.
"Did you?" She asked. He knew what she meant.
"It's been taken care of." He said as he climbed into the car.
All of a sudden, Meredith felt a wave of nausea wash over her. She grabbed the bag and leaned to the side. Derek frowned. He didn't like to see her like this. Her stomach was twisting, and it hurt. She couldn't control the vomiting. Derek looked at her pale skin. He watched her hands shake.
"Well, there goes my caffeine." She said before she began to cry.
"Mer, don't cry." He said softly. His words weren't soothing her. Nothing could soothe her at the moment. She wanted to cry. She needed to cry. "Why are you crying?" He asked. He immediately kicked himself.
"Seriously? Seriously?" She asked between sobs. "Let's see. I am on the fast track to failure here. I have worked all my life, only to fail. I mean I was groomed for this, and I have managed to screw it up. We could lose Anna at any moment. We have committed blackmail, which may not even make a difference. Um, I can't get pregnant. Need I go on?" She whined.
"It will all work out." He said as he stroked her arm. "And I thought we decided it was okay if we can't get pregnant."
"It's not okay. It really isn't." She said sadly. "If I fail--" She started.
"You won't-" Derek said quickly.
"Derek...if I fail, I am done. I am going to quit." She said seriously.
"Meredith. If you fail, and you won't. You can't quit." He said, hoping to convince her.
"No, I'm done. I can't-- I will be done. Forever." She said as she laid her head back against the seat.
-----------------
Meredith grabbed her pencil and looked at the paper. There was so much on her plate. Too much to think about. She couldn't think about the stupid questions on the stupid paper. She looked around the room. Everyone was writing quickly. They looked focused. Some looked worried. Not her, she was sitting there.
She couldn't get over the guilt of what she and Derek had done. They blackmailed someone. She could understand Derek's reasoning. It would be a fair trial, just as anyone else would get. Not to mention, the man's wife was content. Although Meredith would want to know. She would want to know if Derek had found someone else. So there she sat, pencil in hand, not able to focus.
She heard someone cough. She looked over to see Cristina giving her a look. She quickly snapped out of her trance. She looked up at the clock. Half of their allotted time was over. Half of the time, was over and most people needed the whole amount just to finish. Now panic was setting in. She quickly began reading questions and writing answers. No one had ever had to rush like this. She just finished her last question when they said the time was up. She sighed, silently hoping she had done it.
"What the hell were you doing?" Cristina asked as they walked out.
"I don't know. I was just wrapped up in something, I guess." Meredith said with a shrug.
"Meredith froze." Cristina announced to all of the interns.
"I did not freeze. I was thinking..." Meredith said as she kept walking.
"She didn't write anything down until halfway through." Cristina said. "You'll probably fail."
"Thanks, thanks for that..." Meredith said as she walked away quickly. She walked straight into Derek.
"Hey." Meredith said as she laid her head against his chest. She didn't care if anyone saw them.
"How did it go?" Derek asked her as he rubbed her shoulder.
"It went..." She said simply. "Let's go home. Let's just go home and lay in bed..." Meredith muttered.
"Naked?" He asked quickly.
"Of course." She said with a smile. "Have you told anyone yet?"
"Nope, I was waiting for you." He said with a smile.
"Well, Cristina knows. And Drew. And Anna, but that's it." Meredith said. "I don't care what anyone thinks anymore..."
"We can wait." He said sympathetically.
"No, we don't have to. Besides, I have to go to human resources. Everyone will know once I get my new tag." She said quickly, she looked at the clock. "So, I will see you tonight?" She asked as he leaned in and kissed her. He nodded his head. "Later, Dr. Shepherd." She told him as she walked away.
"Hey, Dr. Shepherd?" Derek shouted, causing a few people to look.
"Yes, Dr. Shepherd..." She yelled with a smile.
"I'm sure you did fine. And I will see you tonight, my darling wife." He told her as she walked away. She had a smile plastered on her face.
"You got married?" Izzie asked in shock.
"Duh, Barbie. Where did you think they went?" Cristina asked, shaking her head.
"Vacation." Izzie said.
"You didn't notice the ring?" Cristina asked.
"No." Izzie said as she grabbed Meredith's hand and looked.
"You bring a whole new meaning to dumb blonde!" Cristina spat. "We could have been doing illegal transplants in the basement and you would have never known." Meredith gave her a glare.
"I have to go..." Meredith said as she headed down to the basement.
"Meredith!" She heard her mother call her name. Oh god. Meredith paused and turned around. There her mother stood in her navy blue scrubs. The usual scowl was on her face.
"Yes..." Meredith said quickly. She wasn't in the mood to talk to her.
"How did the intern exam go?" Ellis asked as she glared into her daughter's green eyes.
"I'm sure it went fine..." Meredith said with a shrug.
"You're sure? That's it. This is what we have been working for your whole life. And you just brush it off?" Ellis asked sharply.
"I took the test, I did the best I could." Meredith explained.
"The best you could? Oh, nice. You don't do the best you can. You do the best!" Ellis warned.
"You know what mom? I am content. I have Derek and Anna. And honestly, I am not too concerned about it." Meredith told her loudly.
"You are a disappointment." Ellis said as she shook her head.
"It's nothing I haven't heard before." Meredith said with a shrug as she began to walk away.
"Hey, Grey!" Burke yelled across the hallway. Ellis and Meredith both turned around. "I guess I should say Shepherd now. Congratulations."
"Thanks." Meredith smiled as she continued walking. She could hear Ellis catching up with her.
"What does he mean Shepherd?" Ellis asked as she grabbed her arm.
"Oh, yeah. I got married last weekend. It was great. Sorry you missed. Oh, I guess you weren't invited." Meredith said as she pulled her arm away.
"Married? Married? To Shepherd..." Ellis said in disbelief.
"Yeah, I guess in your eyes, I've screwed up again, right?" Meredith asked as she looked at her mother in her eyes. Ellis just stood there as she walked away.
---------------
"Holly!" Derek shouted as he saw her wheel around. She was undoubtedly trying to avoid him. She quickly ducked into the stairwell. Derek followed her through the door.
"You may as well stop. I will follow to the depths of hell." He said sternly.
"What Derek?" She snapped nastily.
"So, I heard about the Livingston trial..." He said with an evil smirk. "Something about Kissinger no longer representing them? Anyway, I heard it on the news." Derek watched her face. She was petrified.
"Oh, yeah? I didn't know. Why are we even talking about this? I don't have anything to do with this." Holly said as she started to walk away. Derek forcefully, but gently grabbed her arm.
"I think you know more than you let on..." Derek said with raised eyebrows.
"I do not." She told him.
"Holly, I know." Derek clarified as he basked in the glory that he was ahead of her.
"Know what?" She shouted.
"About you and Kissinger." Derek said with disgust. "I have to say, you are pathetic. I mean your obsession has gone a little far. You and I, it's never going to happen."
"You arrogant ass. Do you actually think I want you? Maybe before. I was sad, and hurt. But now...Derek Shepherd, I wouldn't take you back for anything." Holly said with a smile.
"Hurting me is one thing. Hurting Meredith or my daughter...Holly, I swear." Derek warned.
"Your daughter? That is the laugh of the century. We'll see how long lasts." She said as she walked away.
"It's going to be a little hard without Kissinger in the picture..." He shouted after her.
"I have enough money. I am sure I can find someone almost as good to take his place." She said with a chuckle.
"You think that now." He said quietly with a faint smile.
---------------
"I can't believe you are both home." Anna said with excitement as she finished her grilled cheese.
"Things have been a little busy. But we are trying to make it so we can spend more time together" Derek told her as he grabbed her plate. He walked up behind Meredith and slid it into the sink. He slowly wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck.
"You gotta quit doing that!" Anna said with a giggle.
"Anna, how would you like to play a game?" Meredith asked as she glanced over at Derek.
"Can we play Candyland?" She asked with a smile.
"Of course. You go get it." Meredith said as she turned to face Derek. "You'll play, right?"
"I want to play Candyland...with you." He whispered into her ear. "Maybe some Almond Joy..."
"Hmm until you hit Payday?" She giggles. "But I'm sure you want Milky Way?"
"Milky Way would be perfect." He said as he ravaged her neck. "So is a peppermint patty."
"Okay!" Anna said as she ran in and opened the box, spreading out the board. "Come on..." She whined as she looked at them.
"Coming..." They both said as they walked over to the table.
"So, Anna. We will be moving to the new house soon..." Derek said happily. "Which means mommy has a lot of packing to do." Meredith shot him a dirty look.
"Really?" She asked.
"Yep. And it has a big yard. Like a park." Meredith explained.
"Does the park have swings, and slides and stuff?" Anna asked.
"Do you want swings, and slides and stuff?" Derek asked with a smile.
"Yeah!" She answered.
"Then you will get them." He told her. Meredith shot him an "Oh no you didn't look."
"This is perfect." Anna said with a smile.
"What?" Derek asked as he looked over at her.
"I got you and Mommy, and we're moving to a new house. And we're gonna live happily ever after!" She said happily. Meredith and Derek smiled at her, hoping it would be true.
I have to warn you...trouble is ahead!