Neben dir vergesse ich die Welt (let me drown once more in your voice)
okay, I went on with the cheesy-ness. My little sis noticed that it was sometimes a bit.. uhm unlikely what I wrote before, but I did my best and fixed it. ;P
My parents always wanted me to be calm, balanced and intelligent. A perfect autum-children, born when the world was colorful and busy preparing the winter. But I was nothing like that.
I was the second child in my family and this circumstand made my life extremly difficult. My older sister was beautiful and kind yet intelligent and careful. They named her Yuna, like the month she was born in. When I was small, she played with me, beeing six years older as she was, and she sung for me. A song of love, warmth and believe.
I can not recall the words, they are lost. But this didn't bother me, for I couldn't sing. After my birth, the doctor told my parents, that I would survive, but my lungs hadn't acted as they should have, making me almost mute and short on breath. They were disapointed with a son like me, weakly and unable to life a normal life.
I was too different from my sister and her mezmerizing voice, so I decided to be 'different' in every way possible. My way of expressing became touch, my only love art. Every time she showed how talkative she was, I prentended to be mute and just smiled. We loved each other, but could not unterstand the other, no matter how hard we tried. Yuna used to tell me stories when I was little, making me laugh and cough, because my breath didn't last them. They brightened up my day.
Once, she told me the story of the young mermaid, who felt in love and left the water for her true love. My sister changed the ending when I was young and always ended the small water-sprite's tale with the words: ''The curse was broken and they stayed together forever. And when you concentrate very much, you can still hear her voice trailing over the waves, singing him to sleep.''
Until I was ten, she never told me that the mermaid actually had died, trying to gain the prince's heart. That day I felt a link between me and her. We were both unable to show our feelings and would die alone, drowning in the sea unable to breath.
All of that may sound depressing and frightening for a young child, but as I said, I had Yuna. When I was beaten up at school because of my 'dumb' smile, or when my chest hurt, she embraced me and sung her song. She kept my joyful and childish self alive. I wanted to be happy for her, smile for her and share her emotions as good as possible. Until he came.
A charming young blond, making Yuna blush just by talking of him. He was nice and treated her well, still I came to hate him for taking her from me. It had to happen one day, as beautiful as she was, but my heart hurt from it. My friends could not make up for her, though they tried. And then she left me. Our parents were oh-so proud of their yound girl, marrying and started to concentrate more on me. To my displeasure.
They wanted to make me 'sporty' and 'intellingent'. I hated it, but could not show it. I wanted to sing and let my voice carry my emotions, but could not. It hurt.
One day I decided to go searching for the witch Ursula, begging her to make me smart, sporty and most of all, give me a voice. Then it would all be good. Or at least I told myself that.
Of course I knew, she would not be there, knew I was fooling myself, but I wanted to do something to be able to say: 'I tried everything possibile. It's not my fault anymore' even if I would drown doing so. The thought ghosted through my mind until I couln't take it anymore and made my way down to the water, sure I would find my destiny in the depts of these waves.
I left home early, crossing the wood and the beach leading down to the sea. It was windy and the waves almost touched my feet. Seconds later, my shoes were drowned. The cold wind made me shudder. It was so different from the scenery I imagined, but I went in, making my pant sick close to my freezing skin. My body shook, arms feeling heavy. I knew that if I would swim out there, I could die. Just like that. But to my suprise, I didn't care. For a second, I was frightened of this feeling, fighting it, but it felt... empty.
After a deep breath, I jumped and dived, desperately searching for something. Anything. A new life, a better one maybe. One filled with sound. My lungs hurt and my sight blurred. Darkness cradled me in it's embrace and I gave in, loving this feeling of beeing loved for what I was. My eyes closed.
Peace surrounding me. But there was something. A sudden move of waves, a splashing and then I felt myself beeing dragged out of the water, back into the cold reality of the beach. My feet touched ground and I sat up, the water still high enough to reach my belly.
The cold suprised me, my eyes snapped open, and meet the gaze of deep blue ones. Someone who actually seemed relieved that I was awake. Mysteriously I had not swallowed too much water so it was easy for me to crawl out of the water and sit next to him in the dry sand. The strong desire to see his face, memorize it and never take my eyes of it, rose inside of me, burning. I wanted to touch him, hold him and show him how grateful I was that he heard my silent cries for help. Wanted him to be mine. All that emotion rested in the smile I gave him. I couldn't tell him what I felt, but maybe he would see my smile and notice it. At least I hoped so.
It may sound strange, for I didn't even knew his name, but the sea had given him to me and who knew he would not disappear like the mermaid in the story? My hand trailed along his face, making him... shake? Was he afraid of me? No, he... I wouldn't let him leave me.
My arms reached out to him, almost without my mind telling them to and then he was mine. His breath was racing, and so was mine.
'Who are you?' his voice made me shudder, goosebumps appeared on my arms. What if he could not understand me? I let go of him, cocking my head on one side. Would he like me and my weak beeing? Panic rose inside of me, making my words even lower than normal. ''I'm ... Myde.'' It took him a moment to understand me, but then he smiled. ''Hello Myde, I'm Ienzo. Thank you for saving me.'' That was too much. Now that I was sure he like me, I wanted him near me. Hold him and never ever let go.
Cuddling up to him, I listened to his heartbeat, fastening with every move of me. And I smiled into his wet shirt. My better life hold me close, amazed me with nothing but his existance. The waves semed less cold that moment and even the wind was just cool. His hand came to rest on my back, shilding me from the the cold, as if I would care about it.
I loved him.
...there will be a third chapter, now that I started working on it.You can stop me (or maybe not) if you review. Please tell me how I can get better with fluffy stories. (read: you're allowed to flame me)
So, thanx and uhm... bye?