Sorry for the long, long wait for this last chapter. It took me awhile to figure out how to write it!

David is dead

The CIA headquarters was as wax-shiny as he left it. Holly White was going to be dropped off but she insisted that she see the cartridge that Kio Marv died for. That so many people have died for. I already knew that it was right because even if Madnar was crazy, the dying words of a mad scientist and a father couldn't be ignored. But nothing mattered any more than the CIA archives that I was heading towards. The CIA probably had information that Foxhound couldn't even get accessed to. The truth was deep into their political games that they ploy upon many soldiers even the most skilled or valuable. I saw that the archives were protected by malleable doors with the seal of a eagle wearing a shield. The plastic couldn't be broken by force. The only way was to get a card key from an agent. I stared at all the Presidents and patriotic pictures that lead down the hallway. What did I owe this country? What did she ever do for me except making me kill for political gain?"

"Snake!"

I saw Holly White running towards me, confused.

"Why did you leave?"

"My job is over. The government got what they wanted."

"What happened back there with Big Boss?"

I knew that question was coming and I didn't know the answer. I was even shocked at my behavior and how morbid I was. I was supposed to cool and collected. How did I lose it to that old fool?

"Nothing."

"It wasn't nothing. You burned him. Kicked his burning corpse like you were enjoying it?"

"I didn't enjoy it!"

My raised voice made her flinch, "Sorry, I didn't know what came over me."

"You need to control that rage or you will be overcome by it. Whatever that madman told you. Don't let him have the last laugh! Forget about him and move on."

Her words cracked into my skull. She was right. I wouldn't turn into a madman like him. Something bright caught my attention. It was an ID card hanging from White's neck. I took a look at the card swipe near the sealed door blocking the answers to my questions.

Though, I knew Holly. She wouldn't let me have it especially in my state of mind. Besides, CIA archives were only authorized by certain agents which the CIA think they can trust.

"Holly…"

Suddenly, she hugged me. I felt this warmth of comfort and pity radiating from her. Like an angel. I couldn't waste this distraction. I pushed her away gently yet swift. She stared at my eyes with fire. I knew what she thought of me. I still owed her that Christmas dinner but I knew it would lead to more than that. I couldn't have that. Swiftly, my hand gave her a knock-out punch. Holly's cheek left an imprint of my knuckles on her white face which was in shock of my surprise attack. I watched her body hit the newly, waxed floor. Snatching the ID off of her neck, I swiped the card. On the other side as the glass doors opened, I saw a retinal scanner waiting for me.

"Biometrics."

I always had a contempt for those. Gently, I placed Holly's body on my shoulders. Dragging her seemed inappropriate and disrespectful. I already punched her to make her hate me for life. The retinal scanner blared a red glow as I sat her eyes towards the multiple scarlet lines dazzling her eyes. The knob above me turned to green and I gently sat her body against the wall. Before I left the second set of glass doors, Holly mumbled something under her breath that made me freeze on the spot.

"Snake…"

Her dreamy voice made me almost deter from my criminal actions but I couldn't go to her. Too far she was already. I didn't want to drag her down with me. Letting her go was the only way to keep her away from me. If she hated me, I'll welcome it. Because right now, there was nothing in my life.

Stacks upon stacks of white file cabinets filled up the entire room. They were magnetized by a security system that originated from a simple computer on the side wall. Normally, computers have dozens of password protocols that took several minutes to encrypt but the CIA seems to be lacking in its security these days or I was getting lucky. Scanning hundreds of secret projects, wetworks operations, and illegal smugglings, I finally got to profiles. Which had nothing I was searching for. I searched operations and my eyes flashed at the file labeled "N3l3/F014" As I double clicked it, I heard someone's footsteps approaching. It didn't matter any more. I found what I came for. One sentence made my life flash in dejection.

It read:

Operations N313/F014

Mission outcomes were successful. Soldier known as Solid Snake killed Big Boss, his father which has been successfully hidden from agent to keep distractions or doubts from clouding his judgment. Thanks to Roy Campbell's cooperation.

"Snake…"

Roy Campbell stood near the entrance with a solemn look, "I'm sorry."

I was very tempted to push his body against the wall and ask him why. But the energy inside of me seem to drain. All the hate and anger washed away into indifference. I just walked past him without giving him a second look.

"They threatened to kill someone I loved if I didn't cooperate."

I stopped for a second to think. Still, no words seeped from my mouth except...

"It's okay, Colonel."

It was more of an acknowledgment than forgiveness. Blame rested on the government and on me mostly anyway. As I exited the building, my future seemed to disappear. I don't know where I'm heading to but I do know this.

I'm a changed man and I don't like what I see.

Six Months later

What is a soldier? At first, I thought of soldiers as protectors, defenders of truth and justice. But I grew up. Trying to be a soldier, I realized that they were machines...I was a machine. Taking orders blindly. Killing blindly. Used as a tool to fuel peace for a time or start a war. But I'm no longer a soldier. I'm a dog of war now. Murdering men and women for money. Does it sound petty? In my rookie years, I heard some government official tell a soldier that there is a difference between murder and kill. For a time, I foolishly believed that fact. But as I wade through the corpses of my enemies, I realized that it was false justification. As my bullets tear open the bodies of enemies, I felt nothing. As I stare at myself, I try to justify my actions. Battle was the only thing I knew how to do. I'm no engineer...doctor...psychiatrist. I'm a killer. Plain and simple. I didn't fight for peace or justice. I fought for myself. For my own survival. There was nothing in my life but war.

After days of killing, my nightmares came back. Hordes of memories flooded my brain with blood and guts. Screams of pain. Screams for mercy. Each kill that I had made in these past years was etched into my brain. I never liked killing. I used to despise killing someone so that I may yet live. I thought it was selfish to just fight for yourself. It was too much now. These nightmares were much worse than the ones I had after Outer Heaven. Nights after I finished my condemned job, I would be restless. Every time I closed my eyes, I will see the eyes of the people I murdered staring back at me. Images of their corpses laying on the ground, bloody and mutilated. Forcing me into a drown of alcoholism. I couldn't take it anymore. My drinking became so bad that I lost contact with everyone I cared about and forgotten about them. One night, I looked at the map of the great U S of A. I didn't know why. As I stared at the state of Alaska, I felt compelled to pack up my things from the hotel and take a plane there. I did. The next morning I went to the Langley Airport and took the earliest flight to the state of Alaska. Roy Campbell and Master Miller gave me their phone numbers so I could stay in contact in with them. Something inside told me that those two will never see me again or the old me anyway.

Alaska. The place was cold. None of the coats I brought worked to keep the below zero temperature from giving me hypothermia. Good thing the airport of Anchorage had clothing shops. As I walked the busy streets of the city, I took in the scenery. Horns blaring. People crossing the streets, trying to dodge cars that disobey the traffic laws. The sidewalks were a little better. He saw all kinds of people; newly-couples enjoying window shopping, mothers and fathers walking their children to candy shops or the mall that laid behind him, and businessman looking at their watches. All these people no matter how different had something in common. They belonged here. Their eyes clean from blood and trauma. These people will never see war like he did or understand it like he did. So they will never understand him. I didn't belong here with civilization. Was Big Boss right? Have I been in war too long that I can't enjoy what these people cherish so much? It was all so complicated. Suddenly, I got paranoid, all my senses became more aware. The civilan clothes I was wearing became tight and my nose twitched with the scent of blood. As the people stared at me, some of them were curious. Some were just freaked out by my nature and some wear faces of disgust. I looked down at myself to see blood on scaly skin. I panicked. I held my head with my hands and screamed as my whole body transformed into my codename. A flash of light hit my eyes as I realized that it was all a nightmare. I was still outside. My head was resting on the brick walls of the hotel that I was going to rent. I changed my mind. I don't belong here. My world was cruel, tormented, and evil. These people were from a different world. I was no longer a man but a shell of man. I was a snake and I belonged in nature.

Several days later, I moved all my things in a isolated cabin on a hill of a place called Twin Lakes. The natives that lived on the mountains behind me taught me how to train dogs and Silver, one of the Yupiks I befriended, gave me his fifty huskies out of the kindness of his heart. They accepted me into their land and I was grateful to them. More and more I kept myself stationed inside that little cabin. I became more introverted and secret. Most important of all, I became colder and dark. I looked at my mirror and see a dirty old man tired of everything. My hair was wiry and long. I was filthy. I was an animal. The only family I had was those fifty huskies and I'll protect and feed them as long as I live.

As my nightmares subsided, I felt peace. Thanked the natives and the dogs for giving me a life that didn't involve killing. I signed up for many small dog-sled races to help pay for supplies and food. As the people ask me for my name, I say 'David"

But deep down inside, David was gone. He fled my soul after Zanzibar Land. Solid Snake, the soldier and a killer, remained. Snake killed David.

David is no more.

Is David really dead? I don't think so. He is just hidden for a while=)

This is the conclusion of Trial of Pain. I hope you guys have enjoyed it!