A/N: I made Kamek more involved in Bowser's recovery than Kent was in King Lear's. I also added Morton's plot summary to include the fact that Ludwig and Lemmy made it to camp – another thing I fabricated to keep the play interconnected (in King Lear, they merely visit an unseen friend, who is then apparently replaced a tree in Act V. Scene ii.). The fact that Peach and co. know the full story about their enemies doesn't change anything – it just makes the last scene a little less talky (that's when the summaries come in Lear).

Act IV. Scene vii.

"Oh! Kamek!" The old Magikoopa was certainly surprised from Peach's enthusiasm as he woke from his nap and reentered the main foyer, where the Toads were preparing for war. Peach immediately ran over and hugged him. "Without you, we never would have gotten to Bowser in time!"

"You found him?" now Kamek was grinning too.

"Oh yeah," nodded Luigi, walking up to the pair as Peach released Kamek. "A few miles north of the town – he led us on quite a chase, but when we finally caught up to him, he was too tired to put up a fight. We didn't want to press our luck, so we used the Return Pipe right away."

"We gave him the medicine you recommended and he's sleeping off the last of his madness… I hope," a hint of doubt crawled back into Peach's voice as she spoke.

"That medicine will do the trick – Bowser's still his old self deep down, and with you here, I'm sure we can bring him back to the surface."

Peach smiled at Kamek's reassuring words. "Thank you – you don't know how much this means to me… Why don't you take off your disguise? I'm sure seeing you will help Bowser too."

Kamek shook his head. "I still have a bounty on my head – remember? It'd be safer for everyone if I kept up my little charade until I'm officially pardoned. Besides, Bowser cares about you much more than he does me – we shouldn't distract him from your happy reunion."

"Speaking of which…" Luigi pointed across the hall as Morton appeared through another door, leading a bleary Bowser by the hand.

"Bowser!" cried Peach, rushing forward to meet him. She clasped his free hand in both of her own and searched his face with her watery eyes. "Are you feeling better?"

Bowser smiled at her. "You're the prettiest Shayde I've ever seen."

"Shayde? No, Bowser, we're not in the Underwhere, I'm-"

"Don't tease me, spirit, I know I could never have made it to the Overthere – not after all I've done…"

"Don't say that, Bowser! You're not dead – it's me, Peach!"

Bowser pulled his hand from Morton's and rubbed his forehead. "Urgh… Where am I? Where have I been? This dungeon looks familiar… Is this a trick? It feels so real, how can this be another delusion?"

"I think you mean, 'hallucination'," corrected Kamek, in spite of himself.

Bowser opened his eyes and glared at Kamek. He looked so much like his old, temperamental self, Peach gripped his hand harder. "Bowser? Look at me! Don't you recognize me? Can't you remember me?"

"I can't remember much of anything," said Bowser. "I can't remember where I slept last night, or what I've been doing today, or how I got here, why I slept here… Don't laugh at me, but I know I must be insane, because I think you're my beloved Princess Peach."

"I am! I am!" sobbed Peach, hugging Bowser's midriff.

He peered down at her in confusion. "Crying? Seeing me has made you unhappy… I know you don't love me…"

"No! No! That's not true – I'm happy to see you! I do love you! …As a friend… I came back to save you from the ones who don't love you." Peach decided to switch the subject before Bowser had a chance to become angry about his horrible children again. "You're safe here!"

"Are we in Brooklyn?"

"No, we're-"

"Big Ape City?"

"No, that's the same as Brooklyn."

"That's something I could never remember," said Bowser wryly.

"We're in Rogueport," said Peach, before Bowser could cut her off again.

"Where?"

"I think it's time to let His Befuddledness rest some more," said Kamek, stepping forward before Peach could address Bowser's latest bout of senility. "We don't want to over-exert his mind. He's well on his way to recovery. At this rate, he'll have enough of his wits to help in the battle."

Peach frowned at the thought of the upcoming confrontation. Well, we'll deal with that later. Come, Bowser, let's get you to bed."

"Bed huh? Are you coming too?" said Bowser lasciviously.

Peach chuckled. "You are getting better."

"Is that a 'yes'?"

Just to be safe, Luigi followed Peach and Bowser into the King's room, and Kamek walked up to Morton. "Are you up to speed with everything that's going on?"

"Please! I'm speed itself, Kamek! I know everything about everything that's happening now, that has happened in the past, and I can even make educated guesses about what's gonna happen in the future-"

"Great!" said Kamek, before Morton's speech could go on any longer. "I've heard rumours that Wendy's dead-"

"She is, and BJ too," said Morton, not the least bit remorseful about his deceased siblings. "Lemmy and Ludwig showed up in town while you were sleeping – just after Luigi returned with King Dad, actually. Ludwig saw BJ stab Wendy, and then he saw Iggy behead Junior, and then Iggy poked his eye out."

"His eye?" gasped Kamek, though he could hardly believe the news about Bowser Jr. either.

"Yeah, Wendy poked his other eye out first – that's why Junior attacked her. Lemmy led Ludwig all the way here, but they got assaulted by Toadsworth outside of town. Lemmy killed him-"

"Lemmy killed someone?"

"Yep, I was surprised too. He was still shaken up about it when he told me. Anyway, Lemmy killed Toadsworth and found a letter Larry wrote to Daisy that confirmed that Wendy died of her stab wound, as well as revealing that Larry's out to get Roy, and that he (Larry) and Daisy are – get this – lovers!"

"This is nuts," said Kamek, running a hand through his purple hair. "Where are Lemmy and Ludwig now?"

"Lemmy's gone to try and warn Roy, and Ludwig's sleeping."

"I should take a look at him – see if his eyes can be fixed."

"Ludwig already told the Toad doctors he was beyond help – apparently there's something funny and magical about the wounds, but the Toads didn't really understand so I don't know exactly what's wrong myself, since I was busy with King Dad at that point and have only heard second-hand accounts-"

"Toads are idiots, I'm gonna go talk to Ludwig myself before I have to head out to battle," insisted Kamek. "Where's he lodged?"

"I'll take you ther emyself – I'd like to talk to him too," Morton started to lead the way down the corridor. "Oh, by the way, everyone besides us still thinks you're in the Waffle Kingdom, and they figure Lemmy's in the Beanbean Kingdom."

"Finally," hissed Kamek. "Some good news."