So uhm hey everybody. Bet you're all wondering what happened to me. Uhh yeah so I've got no excuses. Sorry x1,000,000 for my absence and lack of updates. Hopefully this will get me back into the swing of things. Sorry yet again. I've got some more story ideas but none will be posted until I'm like halfway done with them because we all know how I'm bad at updating. So uhm yeah. If you don't catch it the italics is a flashback and i had to use the dashes so it didn't look too confusing.

"The moment of truth," Grant said. "Who's nervous?"

"Well you know I'm not," I answered smirking.

"What about you Cain?" Grant and I asked simultaneously.

"God could you to stop with the freaky twin shit for a second! I'm freaking out man!" he sputtered.

"What freaky twin shit?" we asked again.

"Oh, you mean when we-

"Finish each other's sentences?" We both burst into laughter.

"Aw come on Cain. I'm sure it isn't that bad," I consoled.

"I bet it is," Grant said.

"I hate both of you," Cain said with his face in his hands.

"You three stop they're coming," Cecilia said.

Grant and I were laughing when our parent walked into the kitchen.

"Well kids we've got your report cards," Papa said.

"I'm so excited," Mama said clapping her hands. I heard Grant gulp.

"Let's start with Grant. Hm, five A's and two B's. Not bad son. Not bad at all," Dad said smiling.

"Thanks," Grant said smiling.

"My bébé," Mama said placing a kiss on his cheek.

"Alright next is Soleil. Ah straight A's. That's my girl," Papa said.

I gave him a kiss. "Thanks you Papa." Mama came over and gave me a hug.

"Cecilia, all A's and one B. Good job sweetheart," Papa said.

"Thank you Papa," Cecilia said smiling.

"Alright Cain. Let's get this over with. OK we've got one A, two B's, three C's, and one D. Well I'm sorry Cain but I'm going to need your car keys," Papa said holding out a hand.

"Oh come on dad I've got a date tomorrow. I need my car," he complained.

"Well you'll get that car back once you improve these grades," Papa explained.

"Cain sweetheart we all know that you can do better work thank this," Mama said.

"Yes Mama I know. I'll try harder next time," he said.

The rest of us rolled our eyes.

"We know you will. Now everyone out so I can make dinner," Mama said pushing out of the kitchen.

--

"I don't think I can do this," I said shaking my head.

"Yes you can Soleil. Come on you've made it this far," Jacob encouraged.

I took a deep breath and looked before me. The cemetery. And I had a bouquet of flowers in my arms. I took very slow strides to the gate. When I got inside I started counting. I knew the exact number of steps to the grave. 278.

Here Lies Grant Stern Smith

A loving son, brother, and friend

1989-2006

I kneeled on the ground and ran my fingers across his name. I sat the flowers down next to it.

--

"Tag you're it," I said to Grant. As soon as I tagged him I started running as fast as I could. I looked back to see where he was. He was right behind me.

"Too slow Soleil," he shouted.

I wrinkled my nose and started running faster. I just needed to go a little bit faster.

"Now you're it," he laughed.

I turned around and pouted at him. "Grant Stern Smith I'm never playing tag with you again!" I exclaimed.

"Why not?" he asked, confused.

"Because you always win," I whined.

"Uh hey Grant," I said biting my lip. "I know you probably wouldn't want me to cry but I can't help it. I miss you like crazy. You left me here all alone. And then you left that stupid letter. You made it seem like this is all my fault. And I mean I know it isn't.

"And I forgive you, even though you didn't do anything wrong. I've been hurting you my entire life. I just wish you would've came to me. I would've given everything up for you Grant. I would've done anything to stop you from doing what you did. I'm so sorry that I wasn't able to protect you. Please find it in your heart to forgive me."

--

BANG! The gun sounded and we all started running. I could do this. I'd been training for this moment. I would get first place in the 200 meter dash. Just keep your eyes on the prize. I was nearing the end so I started pushing hard. Rip. Shit! I kept running but came in second. I bent over to breathe easier and looked at Grant. He was in the same position as me but he was smirking.

"Grant Stern Smith you always win," I whined in between pants.

--

After I finished I kissed my necklace and stood up. I tried to pull myself together as I walked back to Jacob. When he saw me he smiled.

He opened his arms to give me a hug but i shook my head and walked past him.

"Can we just go?" I asked through tears. I knew this would be hard but i had no idea that it'd be like this. I just wanted to get away from everything, but i couldn't. Next we were supposed to go to my old house. But i don't think i can do this. I'm not strong enough to go there. I need Grant to do this.

"Hey are you alright?" he asked.

"Of course not," I replied. We were sitting in the car and it was silent. "Just take me home," I said.

"I thought we were going to your old house," he said.

"I don't wanna. Can't we just go tomorrow?" I asked.

"Come on Soleil you have to do this," he answered.

"And I will. Tomorrow," I explained. I wish he'd just back off. He doesn't understand what I'm going through.

"I don't know," he said slowly.

"What do you mean? You act like this is so simple. You have no idea what I'm going through. You don't understand how hard this is for me," I said.

"You're right," he said.

"Huh?" I asked.

"When my mom died i was pretty young. Of course i was hurt, but i was to young to be truly affected by it. I have no idea how you feel. I don't know what it's like to have to most important person in my life die. But I do know what it's like to see them hurting. I hate seeing you like this Jay. I just want you to be happy again," he said.

"Jake, I don't think I can be happy anymore. I'm not the same Soleil I used to be."

--

"Grant you know I'm always gonna be there for you no matter what," I said.

"Yeah I know. And I'm gonna be there for you too Soleil," he answered.