Part VI
-
I got Papi to her dorm room and helped her into the bathroom. It seemed sort of inappropriate but I turned on the shower and stripped her clothes.
She didn't object. I washed the blood from her face and hair and watched with sorrow as she cried a little. When the blood was gone, she looked a lot better.
Only a cut lip, reddened nose, cut eyebrow and bruised cheek. I put her clothes into the washing-basket and fished around her drawers for some clean pyjamas.
When I walked back into the bathroom with a white tee-shirt and black shorts, she was sitting on the chair, dried and naked, only wearing her knickers.
I didn't know why I choose to ask her when she looked so vulnerable but I wanted answers. The truth. "Why'd you do it, Papi?" I asked her coldly.
Papi's eyes flickered up and a smile crossed her face "It's exactly like you said... No girl has ever rejected me, you can't imagine how many girls I've turned gay...".
"So you made me believe I could learn everything about my parents? My family?" I raised my voice a bit and winced when I realised how angry I'd just sounded.
Papi looked away and sighed "I'm sorry, Carmen... That night, I used the school computer and just printed random stuff... I didn't know what it said... I thought you'd never find out...".
"Well I'm glad I did" I folded my arms. Silence crossed the room and I realised she was still naked. I handed her the pyjamas and watched as she automatically pulled them on. She pulled her damp brushed hair into a bun.
"How are you feeling?" I asked, unsure. A part of me was still angry but another part me blamed myself. I got Papi beaten up.
"Fine" she yawned "Little tired".
She let me pull her up from the chair and push her into her bed. She let me tuck the covers around her body. I never imagined myself as a mother-figure but it was my fault this had happened.
There was nobody to blame but me and I was fully accepting that it was all my fault.
I searched the bathroom and returned with a glass of water and some aspirin. She gulped it down gratefully. "That should help the pain" I offered with a weak smile.
"You're a good person, Carmen" she told me quietly "Shane's a lucky girl".
I knelt down beside her, shaking my head "I'm not with Shane".
"She's a lucky girl" Papi explained "Because whether you want to admit it or not, you've got feelings for her".
"I'm sorry that I used you, Papi" I whispered "And I'm sorry that this happened".
"My fault" Papi shook her head "I was just angry that you liked Shane more than me...".
"You and your big ego" I laugh quietly.
There was a silence until she smiled. "You forgive me then?".
I paused. Forgiveness had never been one of my strong points. In fact, a couple years ago, if someone had tried that on me, I'd have pounded them to the ground, and then I met Bette. And I learned to trust again.
I nodded slowly "Okay Eva... I forgive you".
She smiled again and closed her eyes.
"I'm gonnah let you get some sleep, yeah?" I whispered. I waited until she was fully asleep until I left her dorm. I headed straight for mine.
Whether she liked it or not, Shane and I needed to talk.
-
When I got back to the dorm, Shane wasn't there. Dana and Alice were in bed, talking and Jenny was faking sleep. I knew I should talk to her about it but right now, all I wanted was Shane.
"Where is she?" I asked the room.
Jenny stayed silent but Dana and Alice looked up.
"I don't know" Alice shrugged "She... After you took Papi away, she just stormed off upstairs, didn't even say a word".
My brain clicked. There's only one other place she could be. It was a long shot, but it was the only shot I had. I spun on my heels and raced out, trying to remember where we had gone before.
-
I wasn't surprised when I found her on the roof, downing a bottle of Russian Vodka. Real smart. Luckily, she wasn't that drunk. I felt like slapping her but instead, I slammed the door shut and her head cocked up, frowning.
"What the hell was that?" I demanded, walking over to her.
"Go away, Carmen" she muttered.
"I'm not leaving until we talk" I tell her calmly "Now you wanna explain why the fuck you nearly punched Papi's lights in?".
"She was acting like a spoilt bitch" Shane shrugged.
"So you hit her!?" I shriek. Okay, I didn't mean my voice to come out sounding like that...
"Oh please" Shane rolls her eyes "Your girlfriend's gonnah be fine...".
"She's not my girlfriend" I retort.
"Oh?" Shane frowned "Wouldn't that make you the local whore?".
"Real smart, Shane" I nod "Coming from the biggest player here! I'm not stupid; I know you fucked that girl".
"What girl?" Shane frowns.
How original! Even the player doesn't remember who she slept with earlier on...
"The one you played tonsil-tennis with this morning" I see her move towards me so I move back.
"Amber was..." Shane trails off "She was nothing".
"Who the hell are you to kick the crap out of my..." I now trail off. What was Papi to me? A friend? Lover? One-night stand?
"She was saying all those things about you" Shane tries lamely "And she had it coming, that bitch".
I look away. I'm torn again. I wanna hate Shane for that stupid girl and the fact that she's kind of a drunk, who kicks the crap out of other people but then... She's standing there, looking so venerable, and tiny. I hate how she makes me feel.
"Carmen?" Shane whispers.
"What?" I reply.
"I'm sorry about that girl" Shane breathes "I didn't—".
"It's okay, Shane" I cut her off "It doesn't matter, right? I mean, it's not like we're together or anything... Or that we feel anything for each other...".
Shane turns away and I hear her inhale sharply.
"Everything's sorted out then?" I ask, not really expecting an answer from her. She stays silent.
"Good" I nod "See you later, then" I turn and head for the door. I hear her turning around but I don't reply. I'm not doing this anymore. Shane and I are just friends.
That's what I told myself as I slammed the door shut behind me. I pretended to myself that I didn't hear her break down and cry the minute I was gone.
If I did do something about it, turned around and held her and told her everything would be okay, I wouldn't be able to pretend anymore. I would have to face up to the fact that I'm in love with Shane.
And facing up to my feelings is also, not one of my strong points.
-
I lay in that morning. It was Friday and apparently to Alice, Friday was an un-official holiday. I could hear Alice and Dana debating on what they should do that day. I also heard Jenny sigh, scoffing another box of chocolates. Okay, this has got to stop. Chocolates are only acceptable when someone has died, you have a period, you're pregnant or your partner of 14 years has dumped you.
I glance over to Shane, who has her ear-phones in, listening to some music from her iPod. I sigh and ponder on whether I should hop out, go over, and get shouted at. Maybe not.
My attention is drawn over to Jenny, who is now opening her second chocolate orange. Uh-huh. No way. I get up and walk over to her pink fluffy bed.
"Jenny" I sit down across from her and take the chocolate orange.
"Carmen" she whines, grabbing them back.
I put on my best strict-face and throw the chocolates on the floor. Dana, Alice and Shane look up.
"No" I tell Jenny "This has got to stop! You can't keep feeling sorry for yourself!".
"Yeah" Alice frowns "Why is that, anyway?".
"Period-pains" I lie.
Jenny throws me a look but I laugh and grab her by the hand. "No, we're not gonnah keep feeling sorry for our-selves, kay? If anyone should be eating chocolates, it's me! I just got out-ed as the local slapper! Now move!".
"Where are we going?" Jenny whines again.
"You missy..." I reply "Are going to shower, shower! Cause no offence, you don't exactly smell very good...".
She gives me a look and goes into the bathroom without another word. I smile my best told-you-so smile and plop back down on her very comfy bed. God, she's so lucky, this bed is so soft and comfy...
I look over and see a box of open chocolates... Maybe one wouldn't hurt—
"If I can't have them, neither can you!" Jenny's voice shrieks from the bathroom.
I pull my hand back and pout. Fine, whatever. I look over at Alice and Dana. They're kind of cute. Both sitting on the same bed, reading a magazine as Alice has her diary out, writing furiously. Dana doesn't even look once to see what she's writing.
I make a small glance at Shane, who's turned over on her side, her eyes closed, still listening to music. She looks so cute and peaceful when she's like that.
"So what you gonnah do today?" Alice asks us.
"Something where Jenny can't mope around" I reply, rolling my eyes "Y'know, go swimming by that lake, fish... I don't know...".
"Sounds cool" Alice sits up "Can we come?".
Dammit. I was trying to get Jenny away from Alice and Dana, not keep shoving them together. "Oh, I don't know..." I shrug "Jenny really doesn't wanna be around people today...".
Alice looks taken back, then she nods. I know she doesn't believe me. Nobody seems to believe anything I say in this place. Jenny appears from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her body and her hair dripping wet.
She gives me a glare and then a smile and goes to her drawers, rummaging around. She pulls out a short demin skirt, black ankle heeled-boots and a pink tank-top. I see her whip out her bra and pink pants and walk back into the bathroom.
I resentfully get up from Jenny's bed and walk over to my own bed, where I open my suitcase and find dark brown army pants and a long light-brown halter-top. I never thought I'd rock the army-look but turns out, I kinda do.
I wait in silence for another 20 minutes until Jenny emerges dressed and hair damp. She walks straight to her make-up bag and plugs in her hair-dryer and straightners.
I mutter something about being quick and take my clothes into the bathroom so I can shower. When I come out from the shower, I dry my body and dress quickly. I'm too tired to dry my hair so I just pull it into a high pony-tail.
"Nice" Jenny smiles when I reappear from the bathroom "Love the warrior-theme-thing".
I muse a smile and see her finish straightening her last bit of fringe. It amazes me how fast she can dry and straighten her hair. "You're not putting on any make-up?" she asks.
"This warrior doesn't need to give in to petty expectations" I tell her, flopping down on her comfy bed again.
"Huh" Jenny nods, turning off her straightners. I had to watch in boredom for the next half an hour as she applies a light foundation, mineral foundation, concealer, pink blusher, pink eye-liner, pink lip-gloss and pink mascara. Oh god. I'm in a horror pink version of a Barbie Dream House.
"You done?" I yawn.
"Almost" Jenny smiles as she squirts herself with some fancy—wait for it—pink perfume. I like pink as much as the next person but seriously, it is possible to wear too much pink.
"What is that stuff?" I wince.
"La Paris" Jenny replies "It's French, my aunt sent it to me while she was on holiday there".
I nod "Great, can we go now?".
"Where are we going anyway?" she frowns as I pull on my black all-star converses.
I shrug "I haven't seen all of this place yet... You can give me the grand tour and we can... Go walking about in the woods or by the lake" I shrug "Or something...".
"Great" Alice chips in "Don't mind if me and Dana tag along? No? Great!" before I know it, she's getting dressed.
I give Jenny a sympathetic look and she glares at me, looking at the floor. Great, my plan to get Jenny away from Alice and Dana isn't going so well... God, can't some people take a hint.
"No!" I force a chuckle "You don't wanna leave Shane here... All by herself".
"Then she can come" Alice nods, buttoning up her jeans.
"What?" Shane sits up, taking out her ear-phones.
"We're all gonnah go wandering down by the lake" Alice tells her "And you're coming".
Fuck. This is just so fucking great! My plan to get Jenny and me away from potential love-interests is now getting to be a bit of a bother.
"Great!" I cry, pushing Jenny towards the dorm-door "Meet us down there when you're ready!".
I don't let anybody say another word as I push me and Jenny from the room. I hear her sigh as we walk down the stairs. "I really didn't expect her to...".
"It's fine" Jenny crosses her arms.
"Oh, can we make a pit-stop before we go outside?" I ask.
"Let me guess" Jenny rolls her eyes "Papi?".
"How did you know?" I frown.
"Just a guess" Jenny shrugs back.
"Do you mind?" I continue "I wanna see how she's feeling...".
Jenny nods and we take the path towards Papi's dorm. "We're both in the same situation" Jenny states after a moment of silent pondering.
"Huh?" I look up.
"Well" Jenny takes in a deep breath "Shane and Papi are both fighting over you... And if you kind of think about it, me and Dana are both fighting over Alice".
"Except you're not" I smile "And Shane and Papi are defiantly not fighting over me".
"They should" Jenny gives me a look "You're a nice person, Carmen... Don't let this place change that" her words ring out in my head. Papi said something me being good. Now Jenny was talking about not changing.
Did they use to be like me? Before they came here? Is that why Jenny's a cold bitch and Papi's a heart-breaker? We reach Papi's door and I knock twice.
The door opens and one of Papi's friends are standing there. She doesn't look very happy to see me. Guess I should have seen it coming.
"Is Papi there?" I ask nervously.
The girl gives Jenny a glance and then opens the door, letting us in. Maybe Jenny's not just your average Barbie doll. She does actually scare people.
I see Papi, sitting up in bed. She looks tired but overall, on the road to recovery.
"Hey" I smile "How you feeling?".
"Hey" Papi grins "I'm good, you?".
"Yeah" I nod "Almost great... I just wanted to come check on you".
"Thanks" Papi looks down "You can tell Shane I'm not gonnah grass on her to Causley".
"Oh..." I'm a little shocked. I thought she'd have jumped at the chance to get back at Shane "Thanks... Shane will—".
"I'm not doing this for Shane" Papi interrupts me "I'm doing it because if I get another fight report on my record, then Causley's kicking me back to social services, and I'm not going back to that hell-hole".
"Okay" I step back "Thank-you... I appreciate it anyway" I pause "Get better" I see Jenny give her a short smile and we walk back to the door, where her friends are still glaring at me and Jenny.
"Well, that was cold" Jenny says the moment we're out of there.
"Yeah" I nod as we continue down the stairs "Can't blame them though... Shane was just..." I trail off and we walk towards the front entrance.
"Think there's any way of just avoiding Alice and Dana?" Jenny sighs.
"And Shane..." I add sadly "But no, I don't think there's any way we can avoid them... We can just savour the moment of peace and silence—".
"Guys, wait up!" I get ironically cut off by Alice, who is walking towards us with a big smile on her face. Dana and Shane walk slowly behind, almost hesitantly. I know the feeling.
"Crap" I hear Jenny mutter as Alice comes nearer "I hate you" she growls at me, turning away to wince.
I give her an apologetic smile and then fake an even greater smile for Alice. "Wow, you... You lot dress fast, huh? I thought it would have taken at least another 15, 20 minutes..." I laugh nervously "I guess not, huh?".
"Coming then?" Alice grins, skipping out of the big castle doors.
I pause and give Jenny a firm look. She shakes her head but I ignore her and follow out after Alice. Jenny growls and then follows me, Shane and Dana following her.
Well, this is certainly going to be entertaining. Oh great. Just great.
A/N:
Don't you just love sarcasm? Anyhoo, I've decided who I'm gonnah kill off... Mawh ha ha ha!! Reviews are love and this world just doesn't have enough love in it... My view personally...
Love & Hugs
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