Part VII
-
Wanna know my latest revelation? I hate the way I get myself into these situations. Seriously. There has been many a time when I've stopped and screamed at myself for the way I live my life. All I do, is make things worse for me.
The moment I walked from out the entrance to the moment that Jenny cursed silently I knew this was going to be disaster. A big fucking pink-covered tragic-walking disaster.
I was right.
-
"Guys, wait up!" I get ironically cut off by Alice, who is walking towards us with a big smile on her face. Dana and Shane walk slowly behind, almost hesitantly. I know the feeling...
"Crap" I hear Jenny mutter as Alice comes nearer "I hate you" she growls at me, turning away to wince.
I give her an apologetic smile and then fake an even greater smile for Alice. "Wow, you... You lot dress fast, huh? I thought it would have taken at least another 15, 20 minutes..." I laugh nervously "I guess not, huh?".
"Coming then?" Alice grins, skipping out of the big castle doors.
I pause and give Jenny a firm look. She shakes her head but I ignore her and follow out after Alice. Jenny growls and then follows me, Shane and Dana following her.
"Feeling better, Jen?" Alice asks Jenny.
"No" Jenny replied coldly.
We find ourselves walking towards the lake automatically. Let's go to the lake then! Okay, just take a deep breath Carmen, and say it.
"Papi said she's not gonnah say anything to Causley" I blurt out to Shane.
She looks up, a little surprised and then nods "Saving her own ass probably" she goes quiet "So you saw her then... Today?".
Am I just projecting or did she sound hurt? I just nod. I glance over to Alice and Dana, whose hands are linked and walking so painfully close together. I see Jenny looking at them like someone's just told her that the world is about to end. And if Shane doesn't stop looking at me like that, then please, let it be real.
"Oh god, shot me now!" I hear Jenny mutter.
My head snaps up and when I think I'm gonnah see Alice and Dana kissing or something, I see Jenny's swanky friends trotting towards her.
We stop and wait for them to approach. It's like Hitler and Winston meeting for the first time, like Barbie meeting one of Ken's whores, like Super-girl meeting Cat-girl... Can I stress how important/angst/terrible this is?
Jenny stands with her arms folded, legs apart, looking like the queen bitch. And for once, I'm glad she's like that. I don't trust her friends, not one bit.
"Jenny" Jade purses her lips "How nice of you to hang out with these losers...".
Shane clenches her fists. Shit.
"Jade" Jenny smirks "Yeah, haven't you heard? It's National-Non-Bitch Day... Might wanna give it a try".
Jade laughs and rolls her eyes "Whatever Jen... Y'know, since all your years of loyalty, I'm gonnah give you one last chance... You can come back to me..." her fingers trail down Jenny's arm seductively.
Well, okay then. I guess Jenny still has some secrets that I knew nothing about...
"And I'll give you one last chance to back up off me or I'm gonnah make you scream" Jenny glared "And not in the good way..." she inched closer, making Jade step back.
"Fine, Jen" Jade smirked "You're out of the gang" she turned and walked off, her other friends following her.
"You okay?" I asked Jenny, stepping forwards.
"Yeah" she sighed deeply, nodding slowing "Actually, I am".
"Good" I glanced to Alice and Dana.
"Right" Jenny forced a smile "Lake?" she walked off.
I see Dana and Alice follow after her but Shane doesn't start walking. Neither do I. Wow, this is awkward.
"Guys?" I hear Alice cry.
"Coming!" I start walking, leaving Shane there. Remember when I said that me and Shane were only friends? Yep, scrap that... Just call us Tom and Jerry, hating each other but secret loving each other.
When we finally come to the lake, Jenny has taken off her ankle boots and started walking in the lake. It came just below her shins and there was something different about her... Maybe standing up to her friends helped her... In her own weird way...
I walk just by the water, thoughts swimming through my mind. If this gets worse, then I'm gonnah have to do the unthinkable... Ask Causley to get me transferred, although I probably don't know if I could go through with it anyway...
I glance up at Alice and Dana and stare. They're kissing. Full on, lip-tongues, groping. Dammit. Jenny's not seen them yet and if I can—Okay scratch that last part... She saw them, and I saw her eyes, the hurt and pain and I wondered if it was the same pain I had felt when Jenny told me about Shane and that other girl.
Then the pain was clouded with anger and Jenny shoved her boots back on. They all look up, frowning.
"This was a stupid idea" Jenny curses "You can't trust anyone, everyone fucks you over!" she turns and races away from the lake.
"Jenny!" I cry.
"Go away, Carmen!" I hear her shout.
Dana scoffs and smiles to Alice "I knew the nice-girl act was just a facade... Underneath all that make-up, she's just a hard cold spoilt bitch".
Anger boils in me. "Excuse me?" I spin around, already aware that my tone is accusing and condescending.
"What?" Dana shrugs.
"If can't recall earlier" I steps towards her and Alice "We never wanted you to come! I wanted Jenny to get away from you, if anything! And then, you invite Shane!" I point towards a dark-eyed Shane.
Alice and Dana looked shocked.
"Oh don't pull that with me" I scoff "I said that nobody else should come and then suddenly, you just invite yourself and then, you invite Shane! I mean, are you blind? Can you not tell that me and her have issues!? Or did you actually want me to suffer, huh!?".
"Carmen..." Alice begins softly.
"Save it" I storm off after Jenny. Okay, on second thought, that shouldn't have happened, totally shouldn't have happened... But it did and now... Do I regret it?
Hell no.
-
I caught up to Jenny and we went straight back to the dorm. She wasn't in the talking mood and neither was I. We lay in our beds for about 15 minutes until I heard something.
"Carmen?".
"Yeah?" I sit up.
"I just fucked everything up, didn't I?" Jenny whispered.
"Well, if it's any consolation..." I add "I've done exactly the same".
"Wanna have some fun?" she sits up as well and grins at me.
Whoa. Back-up, there was no way me and Jenny were gonnah—
"God, Carmen" Jenny rolls her eyes "Wipe that look off your face... You're not my type".
"Right" I smile "What do you wanna do?".
"Ever played the Ouija Board?" Jenny grins.
Yes, I have... 2 weeks after Bette died, I had done the Ouija Board myself to see if I could get anything from anyone. Suffice to say, nothing happened but I still broke the glass. I'm superstitious that way...
"No" I shake my head. If I say yes then I'll have to tell her about Bette and that's not happening.
"Well" Jenny gets off her bed to sit on the floor "I have..." she feels under her bed and pulls out a Board Game. A Ouija Board Game. Say no, Carmen... Lie back down and say no—.
"Cool" the word rolls off my tongue. Stupid, Carmen... So stupid. See? I hate the way I get myself into these kind of situations. Before I know it, Jenny is setting up the board and I have to sit down next to her on the floor.
"Who do you wanna make contact with?" Jenny asks.
Okay, let's see... My dead mom, my dead dad or my dead best friend? Huh... Just go with—
"Elvis" I force a smile.
Jenny gives me an amused smile and she gets up to turn off the light. Okay, total darkness now. Great. But then she lights a couple of candles and I see her glowing face distantly.
It's always the young ones to die first in horror movies... Great.
"Relax Carmen" Jenny grins and puts the small shot glass in the middle of the board. But her smile soon falls when the door opens and surprised feet stumble in.
"What the fuck?" Shane growls, stumbling over.
I reach out and grab her hand, pulling her down "We're doing the Ouija Board" I pull her. She doesn't let go of my hand and I don't want her too "You in, I take it?".
I feel Shane move forwards and rest her head on my shoulder. Oh god. Control yourself, Carmen!
I see Jenny turn to two more figures "You're in as-well?".
"Yeah" Alice replies, sitting down next to Jenny. Dana takes a place next to Alice. Isn't it weird how one minute you hate someone and then the next you like them?
We all reached out and put our index fingers on the glass. I went to take my hand out of Shane's but she gripped me harder and refused to let me go. I felt her lead my hand to her chest. Oh god, what the hell is happening—
She pressed my hand flat against her chest and it took me a while to realise what she was doing. She was letting me feel her heart-beat. Her heart skipped harder, faster, it was beating erratically and then, oh god, I just touched her soft skin, making her flinch.
"Is there anyone there?" Jenny's voice brought me crashing back to earth and I pulled away from Shane, but again, she grabbed my wrist and linked our fingers. I had a feeling she wasn't gonnah let go.
It was seconds and suddenly the glass started to move.
"Quit pushing it, Jenny" I snap, my voice raw.
"I'm not" Jenny shakes her head. "Can you make out what is says...".
Alice leaned in as the glass continued to move "...D...E...A...T...H".
"Please tell me you're joking" Dana's scared voice announces.
Alice goes quiet "Maybe it's just a fake or—".
The glass starts moving with a fiery passion, jumping all over the place and Shane only grips my hand harder as we move our bodies along with rapid movements of the glass.
"Smash it!" Alice screams.
"Why did we have to do it in here?" I mutter.
The glass jerks off the Board and smashes into the wall. Dana jumps up and rushes over to turn the lights on. I pull my hand from Shane's in time and everything seems normal. Well... Considering what's just happened.
"I swear that's never happened before" Jenny mumbles, shoving the Board back into the packet. She shoves it under her bed like we're safe now that it's gone. Sure.
I ignore Shane's gaze and get up, walking towards the glass. I pull the bin towards me and starts throwing the bigger bits of glass in the bin.
"Be careful" Shane tells me softly.
I just nod and continue. When it's finally gone, I use a thick napkins to pick up the smaller bits "I'll go it tomorrow with a vacuum" I tell the room, walking towards my bed.
We each go to our beds and fall silent. Did we believe it? Death was coming? Someone was going to die? Right now, no... I don't believe it, I think either Jenny or Shane was pushing the glass but I can't be sure. I'm just glad that Bette's name wasn't mentioned... How awkward would that be?
"Do you believe it?" Dana asks the room.
"Course not" Shane mumbles from her bed "It's just a fucking mix-up... Forget it".
I turn over and close my eyes. Shane's right. I'll forget it.
-
"Carmen... Carmen? Carmen!".
I jerk awake and look up to see Shane, sitting on my bed, her hair messy, wearing nothing but her girl-boxers and wife beater. She looks worried, and I freeze. Her soft hand is cupping my hot cheek.
"What?" I mumble, rubbing my eyes.
"You were having a nightmare again" Shane whispers back. I take in the surroundings. It's dark. Alice and Dana are in their own beds, asleep and I can't hear Jenny so she must be asleep as well. I glance to the clock and see that it's 2.03am.
Then it hit me. Again? How many times was I having nightmares that I knew nothing about. "What?" I repeat.
"Who's Bette?" Shane asks me, taking my hand with her free one.
If freeze. Dammit. She knows. I struggle to sit up, meaning that Shane and I are inches closer. I feel her hot breath on my neck and her arms wrap around me.
No, this shouldn't be happening... I inhale sharply and try to pull away... She keeps her arms wrapped around me and I can't stop anymore... I fall into her completely and she pulls me closer.
"Bette is..." I begin, whispering into her neck "Was... My best friend".
"Was?" Shane muffled voice replies.
"She died" I breathed out, clinging to her for life "We... She got knocked down... Saving someone's life..." I frown "How many nightmares do I have?".
Shane pulls back "Every night... You don't wake up, I wanted to wake you but...".
I just nod. Things haven't exactly been very good between us lately.
"Did you mean what you said today?" Shane asks quietly "About... Us, having issues?".
"I don't know" I admit "I guess I was just angry at Dana and Alice...".
I feel Shane pull me back into her. "I'm sorry about Bette". I can't help that little moan that escapes my mouth when she presses her soft lips into the base of my neck.
My eyes roll back as she continues her soft kisses down my neck and she grips my hips. Her lips hover over mine and I stare into her eyes. Those eyes that could tell a million stories...
"No Shane, stop..." I pull back "I'm not...".
"Okay" She whispers, planting a chaste kiss on my cheek. I feel sad when her body leaves mine and she goes back into her own bed.
Dammit. There's nowhere to escape her. Tears come through my eyes and I brush them harshly away. I slide back down and rest my head on my pillow.
My body craves her again, I need to smell her again... It's so intoxicating... I need her. Without knowing it, I get up and go over to her bed. She turns over and looks at me.
I stare down at her. God Shane, how the hell do you make me feel like this? She rolls over and I get in without hesitation. Tears are falling down my face and I have to squash into her so we can both fit this single bed.
She wraps her arms around me and pushes my head into her chest, sighing deeply. I bite my lip when I feel her fingers making circles and patterns over my arm.
I feel the covers slip over us and Shane link her legs through mine. Everything just comes naturally to me and her. She does the most terrible things that make me feel that my heart is getting ripped out and then... She goes and makes me feel like I could die with just one touch from her. This is killing me but it's all I want.
"Shane" my lips move against her chest and I feel her tense. She cups the base of my neck and lifts my head up. Her other arm hooks around my waist.
Her eyes seek mine and I take a deep breath before I continue.
"Papi... She's not..." I stumble out "She... I didn't... We—".
"I know, Carmen" Shane cuts me off "I know".
"You were right about her" I whisper "I'm sorry".
"Me too" Shane says, wiping my tears away.
God, I feel so grown up... It's unreal, I never thought I could feel like this, it's unbelievable. She presses a gentle kiss to my forehead and it takes everything in me not to spin her over, pin her down and make both of us scream.
"Night, Carmen" Shane whispers, closing her eyes. I sink my head back into her chest and shut my eyes. Maybe something good would come from living here. But then again, I'm afraid of my emotions, they scare me...
But most of all, she scares me.
A/N:
New part, woohoo!! It took me a while cause I had this fare thing to go to... It was soooo good, got this new good-luck charm, cause I totally need it... Anyhoo!!
Reviews are the icing on the top of the cake!! XD
Love & Hugs
x