A/N: I know it's a little late, but I'm having a bit of writer's block as to where I want this story to go. I hope you guys like this chapter. Feel free to PM me with ideas.

Disclaimer: Don't own it, any of it. Just some books and kick ass CDs.

CHAPTER 3

Previously on In a Land of Lunatics

"Don't worry, Bella" Alice told me before we got out of the car. Once the door opened, it seemed James and Edward had snapped out of their daze and turned away. It was going to be a long day. I just hoped we could get through it without another bloodied head.

I raised my eyebrows at Alice and tried to figure out what there wasn't to worry about here. I still hadn't figured out how and why Edward had gotten that gash on his head. I knew James and he fought, but it didn't make any sense. Whatever...food for thought.

Alice and I slowly made our way out of the car, into the war-zone. Alice, being the awesome friend she was, left my side as soon as she spotted Jasper hanging out Edward, Emmett and Rose. Traitor. I figured now was as good a time as any to talk to James about his behavior and let him know I didn't want to be with him anymore.

I made my way to him, very aware of my friends boring holes in my back as I walked. I could feel my confidence wavering as I went over to him, mostly because I didn't know who James was anymore. Was he that guy I loved from a year ago? Was he that guy that had fallen into some black hole? And as I walked, I started to ponder what Edward said that morning. James was hanging out with a drug dealer. Was he doing them? Obviously, don't be so dense, woman.

I resolved whatever inner conflict I had about breaking up with him by the time I reached his car. I wasn't going to stick around and be with him when he wasn't the same guy I used to love. And as much as I wanted to help him, I didn't need to be his girlfriend to do that.

"James, can we talk?" Steady voice, check. No fidgeting, check. Lines, I'm just going to wing it. Check.

"Yeah, babe. What's up?" He put an arm around as he spoke, and I couldn't help but shake it off. No thank you, mister. I gently detached myself and looked up at him.

"Um, I don't know how to say this to you." Crap, I really should've thought things through better. "Look, things have been going badly with us for a while. I feel like I don't know you anymore, as cliché as that sounds. I just feel like you and I are on two different pages."

"What are you talking about? We're fine, Bell. Now, come on. Let's go to class."

"James, stop. We're not fine. When the last time we've done anything together? I didn't even know you knew I've existed the past five fucking months! We are NOT okay." I couldn't even help myself from getting a little angry.

"That's not true, baby. Of course, I know you exist," he said while pinching my cheeks. Oh, hell no. There would be no patronizing Bella today, or any day for that matter.

"Now, stop this little rant. Let's go to class and then I'm going to take you for some exciting times after class. Involves me, you, my bedroom, and whipped cream. Sound good?"

"No, it doesn't sound good. Nothing that involves me doing anything with you sounds good. Look, I already told you how I feel. I'm breaking up with you, James. I don't want to waste time chasing after something you're so obviously not anymore. Sorry, James." I turned away from him and made to step away, but he grabbed me arm and yanked me back around.

"No." He said in this calm, almost deadly voice. "No. You're not going anywhere, and you sure as hell aren't breaking up with me, Bella. Now, stop with this shit and let's go to class. We'll talk about this later." James started pulling me towards to school doors and as angry as I was, I couldn't pull away from his strong grip.

"Let her go, James." Ah, another calm deadly voice.

"Mind your own business, man. This is between me and my girlfriend."

"Actually, it sounds like she's not your girlfriend anymore. Now, why don't you take your hands off her before I help you," Emmett angry was very scary. And I couldn't help but be a relieved he stepped in. I was becoming extremely uncomfortable with James' hands on me, and I wasn't sure what he would do once we were alone.

"Don't tell me what I should or shouldn't do. Don't try to step in here and act like you own the fucking place." James had let go of me at this point, and taken a step towards Emmett. Emmett wasn't one to back down, so he stood his ground.

"I never said I did. But when I see you over here harassing a good friend of mine, you better be sure I'm going to step in. Come on Bella, Rose wanted to see you." Emmett took my hand and gently steered me to him. James stepped closer again. "Relax, man. Really." I couldn't imagine anyone stupid enough to take on Emmett angry. James obviously agreed.

He looked dead at me and I could just see the anger he had for me building. "Fuck you," he told me.

"Right back at ya," I muttered as he turned and walked away.

He got in his car and sped out of the parking lot. So much for school. Emmett and I walked to where everyone was standing. I risked a peek at their faces. While Rose and Alice look sympathetic, mad, and maybe a little triumphant, the boys didn't look happy at all. Emmett looked at me with concern on his face, while Edward and Jasper were staring in the direction James was driving with downright murderous looks on their faces. It seemed as though we had attracted a crowd that was scattering when we looked.

"Thanks, Emmett. Seems like someone is always looking out for me around here." I gave him what I thought was going to be a quick hug, but then he went and did something stupid. He held me tight, and rubbed my back all consoling and shit. And granted it was just what I needed, but it made me want to break down and cry. I felt the tears well up and I fought to hold them back. I was sure Emmett could feel my body trembling with the effort to not cry. He just held me tight, dipped down by my ear and said,

"Anytime, Bella. And if I see his hands on you again when you don't want them there, you and I can kidnap him and cut his dick off. How's that?"

I laughed at the seriousness in his voice and nodded my head while I composed myself to face the others. When I picked up my head, Rose and Alice hugged me tight and I pushed them off with an "I'm not fucking glass. Get off me, women. Thanks anyway."

I was a little ashamed of my outburst, but I was human….and a girl after all.

"See you bitches at lunch." I said with a little wave.

We got all out stuff together and headed to homeroom. Emmett took Rose's hand and they headed off. It seemed they class together. Alice and I had homeroom and first period together. But I didn't want to bother her time with Jasper, so I told her I'd meet her there. It was a good thing she knew I just wanted some time to think.

I walked off in the direction of class and I couldn't help but be a little upset. James was a really big part of my life, and even though things got really bad, he was still my boyfriend, and I still cared. As I walked across the lawn, I heard footsteps behind me.

"Hey." A quiet, musical, deep voice called from behind me. I stopped and turned around to see Edward jogging up to me. "I was going to leave you alone, but walking behind Jasper and Alice doing the mating dance is really nasty."

I laughed at the thought, because I'm sure it was gross. And though I did want to be alone, it was nicer to have someone walk with me and take me mind off of things. Dwelling on my anger probably wasn't healthy at all. But I couldn't help it. I couldn't help wondering where James had gone, if he was finding solace in one of the many bimbos I knew he was screwing when he wasn't screwing me. I hoped he wasn't going to do anything stupid, or try to fight burly Emmett, because that would be comical. So many random thoughts and feelings. Hurt was the predominant feeling. I hated feeling hurt.

"I'm not going to ask you if 'you're okay' because you're not. But will you be alright?" I looked up at Edward and he had only concern etched across his face and sympathy read clear in his eyes. His beautiful, brilliant green eyes. Snap out of it! Good God, just broke up with my boyfriend and getting dazzled by this hot dude in front of me. Worst part, he's not even trying and he's not even into me.

"Um, yeah. I'll be fine. Just sucks, you know?" I answered. I was wondering if he did know. I didn't know him all that well, and he had this bad boy thing going for him. But I wanted to know if that was all there was to him.

"Yeah. I do know." And very quickly I saw pain flash across his eyes, and had I not been staring into them like a friggin hungry puppy, I wouldn't have seen it, but I did.

Things between Edward and I were getting a bit deep, so in a need for a change of subject I asked, "How'd your head doing?"

"It's fine. The cut wasn't that deep. Dad cleaned it up this morning. He didn't even ask. I was so upset too, because I was going to tell him all about the chicken that attacked me last night." He chuckled softly and the sound was really attractive.

By that time, Alice caught up with me. She had this look on her face that cheered me up right away. She quickly looked between the smiling Edward and me, and smiled wider. I rolled my eyes at her as Edward did the same.

"Come on, Bella! Let's go before we're late. Edward, Jasper is waiting for you around the corner. We'll see you guys at lunch." Alice gave him a push in the right direction and he made his way to his own classroom. Alice and I entered ours and found seats together on the right-hand side, in the middle.

"Spill, pixie." I demanded trying to sound as authoritative as I could while practically whispering.

"You first. I want to know what was going on in the hallway two minutes ago."

"Nothing. Edward just walked me to class because you and Jasper were grossing him out. He was just being nice, and trying to talk my mind off of what happened. That's all. Your turn."

"Well, Jasper………."

"Today would be nice Alice."

"…kissed me." Then she did something unexpected. Mary Alice Brandon blushed. Cue my cheesy ass smile.

"Awww. That's wonderful. I'm so happy for you." But then I realized I wasn't all that happy. I was actually bitter. I just lost my boyfriend and I didn't really want to hear about this lovey-dovey stuff. But it was Alice, and she deserved this. And Jazz was great. "How was it?" I asked, trying to keep my cheesy smile as genuine as it was at first. Of course she saw right through me.

"Bella, it's ok. We don't have to talk about this." I could tell she was disappointed and that broke my cold heart.

"Mary…" I whispered harshly, "you better tell me how fucking great that kiss was or else I'll go ask him myself."

"Bella…" she said with pitiful look. I narrowed my eyes at her. Once she realized I was all business, the blush was back and she gave me a play by play. Cutting to the chase, it was amazing and she wanted to have his babies.

"I really am happy for you, Alice. And you guys are friggin' cute together." She gave me an appreciative smile and then hugged me. The rest of the morning went by uneventful.

It seemed I had math with Rose third period, and history with Jasper fourth period. It was fun to have class with them. And even funnier when ladies approached Jasper while he was sitting next to me before class started, asking him about himself, his brother. One even trying to get his number. He and I both knew he was off the market, maybe not officially but he was. So we just sat there while he twirled a piece of my hair, and I batted my eyelashes at him. It was real work to keep the laughter from erupting. And my eyelash batting must have been exceptionally amusing, because a couple of time he just put his head down and laughed silently. His whole body shaking. And I'd yell at the random girl standing in front of me, "Look what you did! You made my Jazzy cry. Jazzy baby, don't cry…" Asshole would just start shaking harder. No help.

Jasper and I made our way to lunch. We were the last ones to come in and everyone was sitting in the back corner. As I passed a couple tables, I notice a good friend of mine, Angela. I introduce her and her boyfriend to Jasper. All the while noticing the stares from various areas of the room. Jessica scowling, along with Mike Newton. They should get back together. They're so in tuned with each other. They both share friends, the same feelings, herpes…

After introducing Jasper to the few good kids in school, we bought something to eat and headed to the table. Emmett was shoveling food in his mouth, Alice was drawing something, probably some new design she'd come up with, Rose was writing, maybe a new song for us to perform, and Edward was just leaning back in his chair staring up at the ceiling.

"No need for the enthusiastic welcome, kids." I told them while Jasper took a seat next to Alice who immediately snuggled up to him and I took the open chair in between him and Edward. It was either that one, or the one in between Edward and Emmett and that didn't look safe since the bear was feeding.

All movement at the table stopped for half a minute, all eyes on me.

"Fuck off, I'm fine. Keep staring at me like that and you won't be." I whined a little. I didn't want to be treated like I was going to break. Because as the morning had passed by, even though it was a short amount of time, I realized that things were going to be better without James on me, and I had a good bunch of people looking out for me, even though I didn't always need it.

I got a simultaneous nod of the head from 4 people. The fifth one with the eyes I liked to look at just looked amused. And because I'm eighteen years old, I stuck my tongue out at him. Then suddenly, I was feeling even better.

We all ate in a companionable silence. It turned out Edward and I had class together right after lunch. So once we were done eating, and the people around us started to make out, we decided to head to class early and get good seats. It seemed Mr. Banner was teaching AP Bio this year, and he never assigned seats.

We walked into the room and then stood there awkwardly.

"So…at the risk of sounding retarded, you want to sit next to me?" And I was SHOCKED. All capitals because that's how shocked I was.

"Excuse me?" I asked him.

"I asked if you want to sit next to me. I'd prefer to sit next to someone I know, than have one of those brainless bimbos sit next to me and bother me all period," Edward explained.

"Yeah, whatever. Pick your hot seat, pretty boy." Edward just chuckled, that attractive chuckle, and made his way to a seat. It was one of those giant tables with two chairs. I took the inside seat, closer to the window.

I was hoping to ask him about himself, since I hadn't been around much, or paying attention when the Cullen brothers came to hang out at Rose's while I was there. We had about 30 minutes before the bell would ring.

"Twenty questions?" It was like the bitch could read my mind.

"That's so weird…" I said.

"What is?" He turned his head towards me with a quizzical look on his face.

"I was just trying to figure out an appropriate method to snoop. And you did it for me…weird." Again with that chuckle.

"Okay, snoopy. Have at it then." Edward told me. And we fired questions left and right, until we had about 5 minutes until the bell rang. I learned quite a bit. Turned out we had a lot in common. Music, seasons, sports… Also turned out that everyone had gym our last period. Volleyball. And I was good at volleyball. I was hoping the girls and I could go out for the team this year. Volleyball and softball. I used to be extremely clumsy, but I eventually grew into my own, and found that I was good at a bunch of things.

"So you, Alice and Rose made both teams last year?" He asked, looking a little surprised.

"Yep. Actually, I made captain of our softball team. Rose made captain of our volleyball team. Tryouts are next week, and even though we all made the team last year, we have to prove we're still good enough."

"That's…surprising," he said. "I didn't take any of you for the athletic types. No offense. I figured you guys were all about your band, and that's it. Which by the way, your band is fucking awesome. I never expected you ladies to be so hardcore."

"I should be insulted. But I'm not." I told him while he shot me an apologetic glare. "It works to our advantage sometimes. The element of surprise. Glad we could entertain you, Cullen."

I was kind of glad to get to know this side of Edward. It turned out he was a pretty cool guy. I had pegged him for some emo kid with a serious dash of bad-ass asshole. He wasn't. And it was a pleasant surprise. I thought we were going to be good friends.

He pulled out his iPod after we were done chatting for the moment. We had a couple minutes left before the bell rang and our fellow students started pouring in. I sat back in my chair and propped my feet up on the table. Edward put his one of his earphones in and leaned backward to get comfortable. Then we just sat. And it was nice to just have someone sit there and not talk.

The bell rang, but Edward and I didn't move from out positions. Kids came in and took seats all around us. Angela ended up having Bio with us too. Of course, all good things have to come to an end. And who walks through the door? Lauren Mallory and Jessica Stanley. I saw Edward tense a little when they came in.

I threw him a questioning look, and he just shook his head quickly and put his head down to pretend to sleep. Angela, who took the seat in front of me and was telling me about her summer, witnessed this whole thing and we laughed quietly. I laughed until I felt a hand hit my leg, hard. Ouch. So I shut up.

Lauren came sauntering up to our desk and stopped directly in front of Edward. She looked a little put out that he was 'napping'. Not to be rude, she turned towards me with a scowl on her face.

"Swan."

"Mallory. How's the treatment coming?" I asked.

"For what?" She asked, completely oblivious to the obvious joke coming her way.

"For the…" and I leaned a little closer to her, effectively leaning closer to Edward so he could hear as well, "STD. I heard you took a spin with Mike, too. You should've known better, Lauren. Really." And God help me, I must've looked like a really concerned friend. And she must've had something. Hook, line and sinker. The look on her face was priceless. I expected her to tell me off, but instead she just got mad, and walked away.

I slapped Edward on the back hard, so payback and to 'wake him up'. I turned to Angela who had tears trailing her face after our little display. I stared at her wide-eyed before I full out laughed until I snorted. Edward just looked stunned, and relieved? Had to be a story behind that one.

Mr. Banner came in and we learned that we better be happy with the seats we had, as they would be permanent. Edward and I were partnered up and we couldn't do anything about it. I hoped he wasn't stupid. Turned out, he wasn't to my sweet relief. We were given a lab to do and learned that we worked pretty well together and we were done before anyone else in the class.

Class ended, and I found that I had English with Emmett which was one hell of a joke. Our teacher decided Romeo and Juliet was the starter for the year. And Emmett took every chance he could to read aloud in his English accent.

We all finally made our way to gym for our last period. The girls and I made our way to the locker rooms and retrieved our uniforms, which seemed to be getting shorter and shorter every year. I estimated there would be nothing left of it in about 4 years. Poor, modest girls.

We stepped out onto the gym floor, and Mr. Hardwicke, our gym teacher put us all to work doing stretches. Once we were done, he declared it a relatively free period where we could just free play some volleyball. We made teams of six-on-six. Edward, Emmett and Jasper didn't want to miss an opportunity to see us play, so they rounded up three more souls to play six of us girls that were on the team last year. Angela, Alice, Rose, Claire, Ashley and I got in positions and the boys mirrors us. Edward, Emmett, Jasper, Ben, Jared, and Marcus were probably good. I'm pretty sure they were, but they really had no idea what they were up against. Coach saw us getting ready and he got a coin out, and flipped it for the first serve.

I served up the ball, and it flew smoothly over the net where someone hit it back. Rose set the ball to Alice despite her small structure had a running start, jumped in the air a good few feet and spiked it perfectly. The guys just stood there looking stunned. Intended effect.

We played a couple more sets. We had rotated our team so everyone had a chance to serve. Emmett has cursed up a serious storm when I served the ball over the net, and they all yelled that it was going to be out. They realized too late that it was going to hit right inside the line, and the race to stop it, only resulted in a pile of homophobic boys.

After that the boys gave up, and we all just collapsed on the floor after a well-played game. Coach was impressed to see that the girls and I managed a decent game after the summer and told us he couldn't wait for tryouts to begin next week. He was adamant that we all be there and we readily agreed. Volleyball was extremely fun last year, even if Mallory did make it on the team. We may not have been friends out of the team, but we worked well with each others, and won games. That's what had counted.

"Hey, Edward!" Alice called from the other side of the net once Coach left.

"Yeah?" He shuffled himself up to a sitting position, as all the guys had been sprawled on the floor, drenched in sweat by being whipped.

"Bells, listen too. This concerns you. I can't take you home with me to pick up your car today. Jasper and I are going by his house. Rose, said she'd take you but, Emmett and her are going to do something. I don't even want to know what. So, Edward..."

"Yeah, I'll take Bella to get her car. It's not like I have a life or anything," he said sarcastically.

I gave him the finger as Coach blew the whistle for us to get dressed. He had this fake-shocked dumb ass look on his face.

Once we were done, we headed into the parking lot for our respective rides. By the time I blinked, the horny couples had already strapped in and headed out. Ah, to be horny and have a willing partner.

Edward was already waiting by his car when I turned the corner. He didn't look too happy either. Lauren Mallory was making her way towards him. He caught my eye and gave me an exasperated look. One was said 'hurry the hell up.' But, I couldn't help wanting to see what was going to happen. One of those car crash thingies, you see it coming, and you don't exactly stop it. I slowed my step and allowed Lauren to approach. Edward was displeased with me, to say the absolute least. But I was going to help him out, so he'd have to shut up about it.

"Mallory, so nice to see you again." I said while walking around to the driver's side where Edward was currently leaning against his car and cowering away all at the same time. "What can I do for you?"

"Nothing, I'm not here to chat with you." With that she turned away from me and turned towards Edward. "So, I was wondering if you want me to finish up what I started last night. I thought maybe you wanted to come over?" Um, ewww.

"Um, I can't…I'm busy doing…" Edward was stuttering. Well, well. Mr. "Sex Me Up" was uncomfortable. Ain't that something.

He looked over at me. I was thoroughly amused by this. He looked helpless.

"Edward won't be doing anything with you anywhere, anytime, ever. Now, do me a favor. You're getting your skanky smell all over him, and you remember the last time Buttons smelled you…We wouldn't want a repeat of that with Edward. Come on Cullen, let's go."

With that, Edward "the-not-so-bad-ass" Cullen jumped into his car and looked at me impatiently while I walked around to the passenger side. I flipped him off with a look of 'you better shut the hell up, I saved you from a lifetimes of worries.'

"As helpful as you were, I'm not so sure your show is going to keep her away that long," he told me while pulling out of the lot.

"Yeah, well. Better than nothing. When the time comes, you can do your own dirty work. Actually, I was going to help you out the way I did Jazz this morning during history, being a crazed overbearing girlfriend seemed to stop the onslaught of females during history."

"May I ask why you didn't?"

"Because I know Jasper likes Alice, and it wouldn't matter. But being lunatic lover for you would mean I scared away the whole female population, and I'm sure you were just trying to get rid of Lauren."

"Hmmm, you may be right. Thanks. Um, whose Buttons and what happened when it smelled her?"

"Buttons is my dog, and actually. Funny story. Buttons was really sick the whole week, and I knew it. I took him for a walk to get him going a little. Chase some squirrels and shit. He wasn't feeling well, and we passed Lauren in the park. She was just in the wrong place at the perfect time. Buttons stopped to sniff her and he just threw up all over her designer shoes. He couldn't have picked a better time. I told her smell fucked with my dog's breakfast and she was super embarrassed. Good times at the park." I finished chuckling at the memory of her face. Dog vomit wasn't pretty.

"That's nasty, and fucking hilarious. I'll have to meet this little Buttons and commend him." Little, Buttons was not.

"Yeah. He's a riot. Um, we're here. My car is in the back. Thanks for the ride."

"Actually, I was hoping maybe I could hang out by your house. It seems everywhere else is being sexed up at the moment?" He had this look on his face, and he was practically begging. So why not make him beg some more.

"How do you know I have no plans to be sexed up as well? You're just assuming I'm going to go home and do nothing?" I said raising my eyebrows at him. He looked a bit ashamed.

"Sorry. I didn't mean it like that. I know for a fact you're not getting any though. You don't seem like the kind of chick to go get ass the day she breaks up with her boyfriend. But anyway, I guess I'll go chill in the park or something until the house clears out. Later…" He knew he was playing me. He was dragging it out, hoping I was going to give in.

I did."

"Alright, fine. I guess you can meet my cute little Buttons now." Yeah, right. Cute, yes and giant.

"Cool. I'll follow you then." I nodded and made my way to the back of the house to get my truck. This baby was a legend and I loved it. My doggie loved to ride in the bed. He was a risk-taker.

I pulled the truck up to the front and Edward just fucking laughed at it. "Fuck you, Cullen. You wouldn't know perfection if it slapped you in the face. Keep laughing, you can go play on the swings."

With that I started driving down the road, unfortunately Edward was trailing me. We got to my house, and I figured a little payback was due. I whistled real loud, and opened the gate to the back of the house. And there he came….running at full speed…happy and slobber dripping down his face…right at me. I stepped out of the way at the last minute knowing Edward was directly behind me.

"What the fuck is that?" He yelled before he got tackled to the ground and licked all over.

"Buttons." I said simply and walked into the house.

So hit or miss? I had some serious issues with this, but once I started, it went pretty smoothly.

Please review. Good or bad. All are welcome.

May the force be with you this week. I'm going to Washington so I won't be able to post. But as soon as I come back, I'll have a new chapter up