Disclaimer: If I owned Transformers, trust me, you would know, because it would be my name on the movie screen instead of Michael Bay's. So no suing, k?
A/N: For starters - IF YOU WANT REGULAR UPDATES, DON'T REVIEW AND THEN TAKE OFF LIKE YOU'VE GOT A DECEPTICON ON YOUR TAIL! Unless, of course, there actually is a 'Con on your tail. In that case, feel free to run. But, seriously, review, folks. It gets lonely on this end. There are at least twenty of you reading this, and I don't even ask that ALL of you review, but a few more would be nice.
I am not entirely pleased with this chapter, but my beta reader is presently on the far side of the country, and does not seem to enjoy answering her email, so... yeah. She'll regret it when she comes back and finds out that she's not ahead of you lot anymore. Just saw Transformers 2! Parts were really good, and I enjoyed it over all, but I have three issues: 1) they could at least INTRODUCE us to all the new team members 2) way too many innuendos, it was to the point of knocking the film down a star or two, because they were all so pointless and just plain STUPID 3) what the heck was with the Terminator 3 deja vu moment? Seriously? But it was still a pretty good film overall.
See the A/N at the end before you quiz me, and enjoy the chapter! AND PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!
Chapter Ten: Of Mirages and Squishies
Ratchet had been right. Her torso hurt like Barricade had stepped on her. This fact did not get past the Autobots' sharp observations, and Astrid found herself being treated like she was made of glass whenever she was on base. Even at home Jeremy was far nicer than usual and had gone all sweet-big-brother on her. She knew it was a charade, but she decided to enjoy it while it lasted anyway.
College was now looming in her future, and the school year was winding down much faster than she would've liked. It was funny to think that she'd wanted so badly to get away from this little blip on the map before, and now all she wanted was to stay a little longer. For their part, her military and transformer friends were trying to make her last month a memorable one.
Thus far, she'd pranked her brother with the twins, been pranked by her brother and the twins, gone through several rigorous examinations under Ratchet's watchful optic to see if he deemed her fit enough for college life, spent an entire afternoon racing around town avoiding her brother with Jazz, and had even dared to stand within a hundred foot radius while Wheeljack was experimenting with what he claimed were stable chemicals. After that last event she began wishing that she'd paid more attention to the teacher in chemistry. Maybe then she'd have had a little warning before stuff blew up in 'Jack's face.
The one person that she didn't see very much of at all was Mirage, the new 'bot on the block. After he'd so neatly saved her from a gruesome death at the hands of the very hard ground, he'd simply not been in the same circles anymore. Which was weird, because Jazz talked like the two of them were at least fairly good friends. From what she'd gathered, though, he wasn't the friendliest of beings. According to several unnamed sources he was snobby, arrogant, and entirely antisocial. In the end Astrid decided that she was probably better off now knowing him, even though she was still grateful for his timely arrival.
One day, as she sat in Jazz's passenger seat next to her brother, Astrid found herself trying to explain the importance of senior pictures to an extraterrestrial mechanical organism that had an indefinite life span.
"But what are they for?" Jazz pressed. "I know you femme's always love havin' your picture taken, but what's so important about these?"
"Well, most Americans move out of their childhood homes after highschool," Astrid said, "and go on to start lives of their own. Senior pictures are supposed to serve as reminders to everybody that knows you, I guess."
"You think they'd forget you without 'em?"
"No, no, it's just a- well... Oh, forget it. Jeremy? Wanna have a whack at it?"
"Humans don't have literal photographic memories like you guys," said Jeremy. "The pictures just help us remember details about that person. And they're a little bit of an emotional thing. You only give pictures to your friends and family. So if someone gives you their picture than it's like a declaration of friendship."
"There were a lot of big words in that sentence, bro," Astrid chirped. "Is your brain strained from the effort?"
Whack.
"No hittin' the little lady in my interior," Jazz said.
"But you let her hit me!" said Jeremy.
"She's a lady. You're a dude. You'll live."
Astrid cackled. "I love you, Jazz!"
"I know, darlin'."
They pulled up to the Autobot base in a glorious dust cloud that rose dramatically around Jazz's alternate form as he spun to a stop in front of the wide hangar-like entrance. Epps was leaning against the door, most likely waiting for Jeremy, and grinned at the siblings as they emerged from their Autobot guardian.
"What's up?" Jeremy asked.
"Oh, nothin' much," Epps replied. "Just hangin'... waiting for you. Optimus is locked in his office with Will and that new 'bot. Haven't seen either of them all morning. How are you two doing?"
Astrid waved the small plastic cases containing her photos. "Got my senior pictures."
"Cool," said Epps. "Do I get one?"
"No."
"What?" he asked. "Why not?"
"It's indecent to go around giving pictures of yourself to soldiers," Astrid said merrily.
As they walked down the long hallways of the transformers' stronghold they bumped, almost literally, into Wheeljack, who seemed almost as bored as they were.
"Hello, 'Jack!" said Astrid.
"Hello, all of you," said the scientist. "Can I help you?"
"Would you like one of my senior pictures?" Astrid asked.
Wheeljack paused for a moment, probably looking up what 'senior pictures' were on the internet, but when he came back to the moment his head fins flashed happily and carefully extended his hand for Astrid to place one of the wallet sized prints in his palm.
"Certainly!"
"Hey, wait a minute!" said Epps. "What happened to not giving pictures of yourself to soldier boys, huh?"
"He's an alien," Astrid sniffed. "He doesn't count."
"Oh really?"
"Yeah, really. Besides, they're my pictures, and I can give them to whoever I want," she said.
"Unless it's 'indecent' of you," said Epps.
"Precisely."
Epps shook his head. "Whatever."
They were interrupted then by the arrival of Lennox and Optimus, who had apparently taken down the barricade blocking Optimus's office and rejoined the land of the free.
"Hey, Lennox! Do you want a senior picture?" Astrid shouted.
"Now he gets one?"
"Maybe later, Astrid," Will said. "Right now there's something that we need to discuss."
.O.O.O.
"I beg your pardon?"
Will shifted almost guiltily in the hard, human-sized chair in Optimus's office. Beside him, Jeremy was sitting as silently as a stone, seeming to approve, but also seeming to understand his sister's reaction. Out of the three males, only Optimus seemed completely unfazed by the girl's displeasure.
"It is for your own safety," Optimus repeated. "Your government agrees with our decision. I also believe it would be highly beneficial for Mirage to have more interaction on a regular basis with nonmilitary humans. Actually, regular interaction with any sort of humans would probably benefit his perception of this planet."
"But... but... why me?" Astrid demanded.
"Because, Miss Fenner, you are in need of a guardian of your own, and Mirage is in need of a human contact," said Optimus. "I fail to see the problem."
"But I'm going to college!" Astrid argued. "He'd be bored stiff there! And how are we supposed to 'interact' when he'll be pretending to be my inanimate car all day and all night?"
"The same way in which your brother communicates with Jazz."
"There are no private garages for college students! He'll be parked out where everyone can see him, and I don't know how comfortable your alternate modes are for you, but it better not bother Mirage because he'll be stuck like that until winter break! Why can't I just be Jazz's charge?"
"Because he is busy looking after your brother," Optimus reminded her.
"So? That hasn't been a problem before," said Astrid.
"True, however, you were not living in an entirely different state before, either."
Astrid slid down in her chair, wishing it would come alive and just swallow her like something from a bad scifi movie. Anything short of being in Barricade's clutches again would be preferable to this. She might even consider sticking a sign to her own back that read 'Walking Target' while Sunny and 'Sides were in the room.
Had it been any other mech than Mirage Astrid would have been doing cartwheels. But no it just had to be that arrogant, sassy, nose-in-the-air, peekaboo-playing...
.O.O.O.
"...uncreative, unprofessional, uninvolved organic!" Mirage ranted, venting over a cup of energon a slightly shell-shocked Wheeljack.
"Well, I don't think..." the scientist tried to reply.
"What I want to know is why?" Mirage continued. "I only just arrived, and the human clearly has little to do with any important missions or experiments being conducted here."
"Because she's a friend," a new voice put in. "And, besides, yo' idea of 'important' is open to argument there, 'Rage."
"Jazz," Mirage said warmly, "have a seat. What can you tell me about it? I understand you serve as a guardian to the elder sibling."
"Firstly, 'she' not 'it'," Jazz chuckled. "Manners count here, too."
"Alright, 'she'," Mirage consented. "What do you know?"
"For starters, she is not uncreative," Wheeljack interjected. "She's actually quite clever. Just ask the twins. She's teamed up with them on several occasions for matters of... retribution."
"Yeah, she's got a vengeful streak," said Jazz. "I suggest ya try not to trip that."
"Noted," Mirage nodded, "continue."
Jazz's processor whirred as he tried to dig up individual facts about the young woman that might be of use to her new guardian. "Don't honk your horn to wake a human up unless it's an emergency. That's just a general rule, though... Astrid's very... proper. She likes to stick to the rules. She bends 'em from time to time but she never goes straight against one. Look up stuff on the human's internet to find stuff about how gentlemen should treat ladies: opening doors when you're with 'er in holoform, tryin' not to swear around her and all that." He paused.
"Over all... just be good to her, Mirage," he said, his tone almost pleading. "She's a good one, and she's my little lady, so if anybody messes with her, including you, they're gonna hear from me."
"What do you think I'm going to do, step on her?" Mirage asked. With a gush of air from his intake valves, he let his helm fall into the palm of his hand. "They're so difficult to take care of."
"Oh, you won't have to worry about that," said Wheeljack. "Humans can maintain themselves perfectly well without any assistance. The only thing you'll need to do is help her get around in your car form and keep an eye out for Decepticons."
"As if that won't be enough."
.O.O.O.
Astrid's senior year was extremely anticlimactic. Despite her best friend Jenna's advice, she'd never worn the beautiful prom dress that she'd hauled with her all the way from Ohio. There was always the off-chance that she could possibly wear it to some other formal event, but Astrid was seriously beginning to doubt it. Her senior solo was 'Into the West', but she'd hardly made any friends in choir, and the only person who gave a flip and really cheered at the end was her brother. At the end of the year awards celebration for the community service youth team she received a very nice little plaque for all her efforts with her name spelled incorrectly in swirly gold letters. Last, but not least, she'd forgone the time-honored tradition of even having a graduation party. After all, she thought, who could come? Her old friends were half a continent away, her distant relatives were scattered far and wide, and somehow she didn't think it was plausible for the Autobots to come tromping up to her front door with mushy letters and helium-filled balloons. If she was lucky she'd get the Lennoxs, Epps and her brother to attend.
Summer was spent sending off last minute college paperwork and trying to find all of the different things she'd need to survive in the dorms. She thanked heaven that money at least was not a problem. When long years of intensive study and straight A's paid off in full-ride scholarships, it was a beautiful thing.
Then there was the issue of Mirage. Optimus had agreed that he didn't need to actually start 'guarding' her until she'd moved out and could no longer fall under Jazz's protection. He did, however, insist that the spy 'visit' with Astrid in an effort to acquaint himself with her, and her to acquaint herself with him. None of their meetings lasted long. It wasn't that Mirage was blatantly rude, but every time they were in the same room together Astrid could just feel how much he wanted to be somewhere else. So she let him, and she let herself get on with her own life.
With any luck, she figured, the Decepticons would decide she really wasn't worth the effort and leave her alone for four years. That was all she needed, really, because she was fairly certain that if nothing more threatening than college-aged drivers had approached the university in all that time that Optimus would let the two dissolve their 'relationship'. Somehow she doubted either she or Mirage would want it to continue any longer than was absolutely necessary.
.O.O.O.
When Jazz picked Astrid up from the house and informed her that they needed to swing by the base and pick up her brother, her first inclination was to snap at him, but she managed to control her waspish tendencies and climbed mutely into the cab. She'd had a horrible end to the school year after all the great expectations she'd had for it throughout her first three years of highschool, and she just wanted to enjoy the remainder of her summer before she was chucked into another extremely social setting where she'd have to smile and bob at all times under threat of being mobbed by concerned teachers. Kids with a history like hers were pretty much automatically added to most adults' suicide watch.
After a couple minutes she let her head plunk against the glass of the window and stared morosely out at the desert scenery flying by. She tried not to think about all the fun she could've been having with her old friends, tried not to think of how many people she might have cajoled into attending her graduation party, or how many of her wacky acquaintances would've cat called and hooted as she crossed the stage to receive her diploma.
Jazz, being the intelligent and sharp-sensored Autobot that he was, noticed the changes in his charge's little sister and purred through his engine comfortingly. With a tug of the seatbelt, which was as close as he could come to a hug in that form, he gently inquired, "What's eatin' ya, little lady?"
"Just... stuff," Astrid sighed. The seatbelt pulled tighter and she rolled her eyes, which were growing teary as her thoughts continued.
"What kinda stuff? C'mon, you can tell the Jazz man."
"Well..."
"Yeah?"
"Well.. I just wonder what it would be like if my parents hadn't..."
Astrid found herself unable to finish the thought aloud, and wound up choking on the tears that were finally bubbling to the surface. The first drop trickled out from the corner of her eye, and she reached up to hastily wipe it away, but her old guardian had seen, and the living car pulled off to the side of the road and came to a slow stop.
"I know it's hard, Astrid," he said. "Losin' people you care about always hurts. I know. Been in a war longer 'n your race's been around. But ya still got friends. Sarah Lennox'd adopt ya if it weren't for your brother, I'm sure. And o' course all the guys think you're the little sister they never knew. Do I really need to say anythin' about what we think about ya? The little lady that survived the rough and rowdy Barricade and tamed the wild Hatchet?"
Despite herself, Astrid giggled and Jazz moved out onto the road again, merging with the few cars driving on the lonely road out of Tranquility.
"Feel free ta talk to me anytime ya need, little lady," he said. "Even when you're off to yo' grand university, Jazz is always just a call away."
"Thanks," Astrid said, leaning back to snuggle deeper into the seat. "That means a lot."
They soon reached the Autobot base, however the lights were all off in the main hangar-area when they arrived, and Astrid wondered if the transformers had something like bedtime every night. She'd never been to base so late in the day before, so she had no idea, either way.
"Forget to pay the electric bill, Jazz?" she asked jokingly as she stepped out.
"Nah, don't know what's goin' on," he said in a somewhat puzzled voice once he'd morphed into his bipedal shape. "Maybe Red Alert's afraid of an air strike."
Astrid tried to laugh nervously, but it came out sounding higher and far more strained than she'd intended.
"Stay behind me," Jazz said, moving off into the darkness.
"Yeah, sure... hey, wait up! Jazz! Slow down... Ah, boggarts."
Suddenly she was by herself in a very large, dark, echoing room, with no handy light switch or spotlight to guide her way. "Well, this rips." She tried stumbling forward a few steps, but the noise of her own feet startled her so badly that she deemed it better do be eaten while standing still by the nameless monster prowling the dark.
Then, without absolutely no warning, every light in that half of the base came to blazing life, and Astrid stumbled back, shielding her eyes as at least twenty voices all screamed "Surprise!" at the top of their lungs. Her brother's arms clamped around her in a suffocating hug before she'd even regained her sense of sight, and several of their human military friends, including Epps and Lennox, came up to give her hearty slaps on the back.
"Were you surprised?" Wheeljack inquired anxiously.
"Extremely," said Astrid. She blinked some more and gave her head a thorough shake, grinning up at them all like an idiot. "You all rock, you know that?"
"Always have," Epps said. With a shove towards what looked like a sample of the buffet in heaven, he added, "Check out the food. They won't let us eat until you start chomping."
As she drifted around talking to some of her closer acquaintances, she ventured to ask Sideswipe and some of the younger 'bots, "So, is this a slightly belated graduation party, or going away party or...?"
"A bit of both," said 'Sides.
"And also a celebration for you and your new guardian," added Sunstreaker.
"You're the first human since Sam Witwicky outside of the military to get their own guardian," Sideswipe continued.
"I shall call him squishy, and he shall be mine, and he shall be my squishy," Bumblebee quoted.
Despite how uncomfortable the implications of that quote made her feel, Astrid laughed. It was only later that night, as she was resting in bed, listening to the summer swarms of bugs trying to breach through her window screen that she really began to consider everything that having a guardian involved.
.O.O.O.
The ride across the country was long and uncomfortable. Mirage pulled over for Astrid without complaint whenever she needed food or a rest break, but somehow she suspected that this was more from needing a break from the awkwardness than concern for her welfare. Sunstreaker, for example cared for her almost as much as his brother, but he would have griped about the frequent pit stops every time he was forced to leave the highway. Nothing about Mirage had a the friendly talkativeness or even companionly silence that his fellow Autobots possessed.
She wanted to go home, and it had only been five hours into the trip.
When the sun was finally beginning to set, the transformer finally decided it was about time to at least attempt a conversation with the human he'd be guarding for the next four years... at the least.
"I understand that humans select a major when they enter college," he said. "May I inquire what you are training in?"
"Vocal music," Astrid replied.
A slight choking noise from the engine that sounded suspiciously like a snort reverberated through in the car's cab. "No wonder you and Jazz get along so well."
"What makes you two get along so well?" Astrid inquired.
"So well?" Mirage asked, amused. "What makes you think we get along 'so well'?"
"I don't know," Astrid said. "You just seem to talk more with him than nearly anyone else."
Mirage considered a moment and then answered, "Jazz likes everyone. It is not difficult to get along with him, and he is a very informed mech on several subjects."
"What about you?" asked Astrid. "I don't know anything about you at all... besides the fact that you can shoot better than anyone else on base and can turn invisible."
"I am from a... higher class than many of the other mechs you know," he said. "We have different interests and are involved with different pursuits... I prefer high society to crude jokes and rough games. And I prefer peace to war. It is my belief that there are other ways to achieve the peace we all desire than by violence."
"Negotiation," said Astrid. "Always something that should be tried before fighting, but... sometimes you just can't reason with people. Like the terrorists here on Earth. No matter what you say to them, they'll still hate you, want to kill you. Despite that, though, they're still people, they still have souls and lives. Something had to make them that way." Astrid combed her fingers back through her hair and leaned back in the seat. "Unfortunately not everything in life has an easy answer."
By then they were pulling up to the school's parking lot, but any nervous, freshman thoughts were jarred from Astrid's mind as Mirage said in suave superiority, "Well, perhaps when you've been in a war for over a millennia and seen your whole world utterly consumed by it, you'll have a different point of view."
Suddenly, the door swung open, and Mirage skidded to a halt in front of the dorm building with a squeal of brakes and smoking tires. As he tried to figure out what the slag just happened, he realized that Astrid's tiny hand was resting on the inside door handle. All the while that he was floundering for words, Astrid was grabbing as much of her stuff as she could take in one trip and climbing out of the car.
"What are you...?"
"Preparing to start my life all over again for the second time in just over a year," she snapped. "In case you didn't get the file on me or something, I feel it is my duty to inform you that while my entire planet has not been destroyed by war, my world has been knocked for a loop more than enough- I feel- for anyone to consider me a competent young woman, who, granted, still has a lot to learn, but has an opinion that's worthy of at least one iota of respect. My parents died just before I started my senior year of highschool; I had to move halfway across the country to live with a brother that I don't even get along with all that well; I got the slag scared out of me, and got several really nasty bruises from Barricade, and that was even before I found out that nearly everything I believed about the universe was completely mistaken. Now, my brother is not only in the military while my country's at war with terrorists, but he's involved while the whole world is fighting against a technologically superior race that thinks we're lower than dirt and wants to eradicate us from the galaxy. Oh, and I'm entering college, which, in my opinion, is the scariest thing a person my age could possibly face."
She marched off then to the glass door that led into her new residence hall, swiping her ID card with much more ferocity than such an action demanded. Mirage sat where he was, still trying to shake off the last of his shock and trying even harder to think of the words that would smooth over the situation. When she returned, though, she wanted nothing more from him than the rest of her luggage.
"Astrid..."
"Just shut-up, Mirage," she said.
Then she went back into the residence hall, and Mirage wheeled himself quietly off-campus and went for a very long drive, venting internally about moody organic femmes.
A/N: So... feedback? I don't know as much about Mirage as I would like, but I tried to piece this version of him together from all the different versions I've picked up from fanfic/websites. How close am I? General ballpark at least? Astrid flipping out is also something I'm sure will be questioned, but - seriously, folks - she's been through a lot and EVERY young lady I've ever known has moments where they just have to take it out on someone or something. Mirage just doesn't know how to see the warning signs yet.
Replies to those without accounts:
GodisGod!andIamnot: Thanks for the review! Yeah, she has her moments as a DID. Unfortunately, I think that goes with this one's personality. This is also just my way of getting the inner fangirl to shut-up so I can do serious (better and more sellable) writing, and what fangirl DOESN'T want to be rescued by a dashing Autobot? ;) Frenzy and I have patched at least part of our relationship, enough that he keeps functioning, anyway, even if he's still driving me crazy. Hope to see another review!
'Ace: Thank you! Decepticons are creeps, but Astrid's been lucky so far. Is that foreshadowing? Not at all. Thank you and thank you again! Hope to hear from you again soon!