Authors Note: This was supposed to be the last chapter, but there might be another one, it feels slightly incomplete to me. Let me know what you think. I almost didn't post this today, but Eve215 had a bad day yesterday, and I've been lax in my duty of updating daily for her, so, here it is. At least this is easier for me to write than something original, still no ideas for that.
Disclaimer: I have recently discover that I don't have an original thought in my head. If I did I wouldn't be writing this.
It was the beeping that woke him first. The constant beep that, when he focused, matched the beating of his heart exactly. The next thing he became aware of was the searing pain in his side; it was a hot angry pain that at the same time managed to throb. It was very distracting and almost made him miss the most important of all the things he could have noticed. The smell.
On top of the stinking sterile slightly sickening smell that meant he was in a hospital, there was also a smell that he loved, one that he recognized, on that if he wasn't careful would alert the person belonging to the smell to his state of wakefulness. He'd always had the impression that that particular smell could cause his heart rate to speed up, and it appeared it was true.
He focused on keeping his heart rate under control as he thought about what possibly could have happened. He remembered being at the warehouse and fighting with Red John. Red John was far superior to him in strength, and given enough time could probably have bested him in a battle of wits too. There really was only one reason he even hesitated when it came to the fight, even though he knew he would lose, and she was sitting in the room with him.
He still didn't want to open his eyes. He didn't want to face her; he knew she would ask him why he had done what he did. But at the same time he was curious. Had Red John died when she shot him? And he was assuming that it was Lisbon that had fired the shot that he had heard. What if it hadn't been her? What if someone else had fired the shot?
He couldn't worry about that now. How much time had passed since he had been stabbed? Because he remembered that. The feel of the knife in his side, a white hot blinding pain, not near as bad as the pain now, which was getting worse. He fought off a grimis as breathing became painful. He still didn't want to alert Lisbon to his state of wakefulness.
He heard a door open and heard footsteps he didn't recognize enter the room.
"How's our little celebrity doing tonight?" The voice belong to a woman he didn't recognize. She sounded older, not old but middle aged, probably only a few years older than him. That thought gave him pause for a second, did he sound old to people?
"Time for his pain medication, he looks like he's in pain." Lisbon, he would know that voice anywhere. But she sounded tired, exhausted really. He wondered how long she had been sitting there. Long enough for her sent to penetrate his haze. He was now sure that it hadn't been the beeping, but her that had caused him to wake.
"Yes it is." He could hear the other woman; he was assuming she was a nurse, moving around the room, checking machines. He felt a tightening on his arm as the blood pressure machine kicked on. He was pretty sure that if his side hadn't been hurting so badly the gradual over tightening of the blood pressure cuff on his arm could really be painful.
"Everything seems normal," the nurse said removing the blood pressure cuff from his arm. "Time for more medication."
"And he's not even awake to enjoy it." Lisbon said dryly. He heard some more noises and assumed the nurse was marking his chart.
"Well, with any luck he'll be awake soon. There you go. He's all set. You let me know if you notice any changes in him now, ok?"
"Sure thing, I'll let you know when he decides to wake up." He heard the nurse's footsteps move towards the direction he was assuming was the door and then heard the door open and close. He waited to see if Lisbon was going to do anything and was not disappointed.
"Ok, I know you're awake. Now open your eyes before the pain medication kicks in and you fall asleep again."
He reluctantly opened his eyes, expecting harsh bright light, but surprised at the dim glow that was emanating from somewhere behind him. "How'd you know I was awake?"
"Call it a lucky guess." She smiled at him from where she was sitting next to his bed. "You had us all worried there you know."
He just looked at her, was it possible that she was truly concerned for him? "What happened?"
"You were stabbed." She said, doing her best imitation of Cho, just the bare bone facts with no emotion hiding behind them.
"I know that, what happened after that?"
"I shot Red John, then he dropped the knife and we arrested him. Now why don't you tell me what happened after I talked to you last?"
Her avoidance of the subject was not lost on him, but he let it slide. "Red John hit me, we fought, he said that he didn't want to kill me, that he really wanted to kill you because I cared for you and he got more enjoyment out of watching me being miserable than killing me. He had someone following you, and I didn't know if you would be able to stop him from getting you." He saw her smirk at his last statement. "What?"
"Do you think Red John's the only one who could have spies and friends in disguise?"
"What are you talking about?"
"The man following me, Bill, sure he was 'working' for Red John. He also happened to be the husband of one of the officers in the town. Red John thought he had the inside track into our investigation when he came across Bill. But little did he know. As soon as He got off the phone with Red John she called me and told me what was going on. We were able to call the rest of the team for back up."
"So you knew, the whole time, and you still let me go out there?"
"Call it an inkling. We thought it was Red John, but we couldn't be sure, so we had to wait until we had confirmation."
"You let me think that your life was in danger." He was starting to get angry, which was hard to do at this point. He could feel the pain in his side diminishing and his head was starting to feel light.
"I never thought it would come to that. I just expected to have to follow you at some point and have you lead us to him. I was sure you could get him to say something that would make it clear that he was Red John, and then, well, we'd come in and stop you from doing something stupid. When you gave us the slip at the restaurant I started to panic. You weren't supposed to get that far ahead of me."
Jane was finding it harder to focus now, but he had to tell Lisbon one more thing before he let the drugs sweep him away. "I chose you. I chose to let you live. Red John said that he wouldn't let what was his name, Bill? Kill you if I didn't try to kill him. I couldn't let anything happen to you. I couldn't bear to be in the world without you."
"I know Jane. Just rest now." Lisbon smoothed a hand across his forehead and smiled at him sadly. "I know. I know."