When you get passed the Bella's truck scene, start playing "Breathe (2am)-Anna Nalick" It works well. This is my longest chapter EVER. I am pretty proud of this one. :)

It was unbearable.

He was unbearable.

Having my body pressed up against his was unbelievable.

His arms were around my waist, holding me. I felt like I would have an aneurism.

Oh, crap. I need to get out of here. The footsteps retreated and we both let out a gust of air.

Now, to get out before I do something rash. And I was seriously doubting my ability to control myself.

The way he smelled. It wasn't like any one scent. It was a mixture, made into his own personal cologne. I felt like I could devour it. He was so warm, I wanted to stay like this forever. But, I couldn't let my feelings get out of hand. Things would just shatter. Our friendship, for one, the most important. I could not and would not lose it.

I knew before that I wouldn't be the one to end it, either. So, it was all up to him. I had left him with a choice he didn't even know about. I wonder if he knew the effect he had on me. Maybe he did, and maybe he did it intentionally. I shook my head once, dispelling those tempting thoughts.

"Well," I said, disentangling myself from him. His arms were slow, unwrapping around me like they were frozen—from shock. I was shocked. "That was a close one, wasn't it?" I squeaked, unable to keep my voice from breaking, I'm sure my traitor cheeks were pink right now.

Lucky this closet had no lights. I walked forward to the door, testing the knob, cringing whenever it made a noise.

Edward was right behind me, and I was hyperaware of it. I had yearned to touch his luminescent skin, and now, after touching it, I thought my thirst would be quenched. But no, having a small taste only made me want the whole thing. I grimaced as I stepped into the deserted hallway.

"Okay, come on." I said, motioning with my hand. Edward stepped out and quietly closed the door behind him, the door clicking back into place.

I slowly crept my way down the hallway, breaking into a brisk walk as I passed the gym doors.

Edward must have had the same idea, he ran straight into me. "Shit, sorry." He whispered, his hands grabbing my arms so I didn't face-plant into the floor. That would be quite the situation to explain to the school nurse—not to mention Charlie. "It's okay." I breathed. "Um, which way should we go out?"

I asked, breathless, my pulse was thumping like a humming bird's wings. He seemed to be calculating, biting his lip.

He leaned toward me, then out into the connecting hallway, checking around the corners to make sure no-one was coming.

"This way." He hissed, pulling me along with him. I held my breath, afraid of our proximity.

I didn't know how much longer I could take of this. God hated me, if he wanted me to suffer this torture. I suddenly realised something as Edward's hand wrapped around my forearm and dragged us through the fire exit next to the gym. I had grown an aversion to contact.

Jake was the catalyst. Because of what he did, I hated to be touched.

I would subconsciously flinch away whenever anyone but Alice or Angela went to hug me. Charlie didn't hug, though, and I wasn't afraid of him. Edward? I felt so safe. I felt whole. I'd never thought Edward would be the one to heal me.

And yet, here we were, acting like kids, with no problems, carefree with a tinge of sizzling electricity spreading through our skin. What more could you want? I certainly wouldn't be able to find anyone else like Edward. That sounded cliché, but when you're in love? Who cares? When you receive something so far beyond belief after you've been damage beyond the point of repair? Nobody, nothing could compete with that.

That's how I knew I would get no better. Edward. You couldn't get better than him.

In fact, I didn't want anyone but him. I wanted him. I felt slightly relieved and light, admitting it to myself, if only in my head.

But the led weight of denial that had been holding me down the past week was disintegrating.

I felt new, and fresh, but still held the burden of my past. It was a shame to think that although Edward would be in my every thought, I still couldn't not think about the bad things. Jacob. I could definitely live to be happy, but Jacob had taken a part of me that I couldn't get back.

He ruined me, left me broken, physically and emotionally.

But people have pasts, histories that they can't pretend didn't happen, they can't deny, because deep down they know, and the fact that it will live with them forever is painful. I hoped Jacob would live with it forever, not forgetting for a single day how he was a true monster.

Not a fairytale one, not a werewolf, a real monster. One that lived to kill people's souls, their security, who they were.

I had to live with it. I knew other people lived with the same thing happening to them. Destroying them.

I also knew Edward was. I don't know how, but I just knew there was something torturing him on the inside. He assumed I didn't see it, but I did. And maybe one day, when he fully trusts me, the way I trust him, he will tell me. Until then, I will remain the loyal friend, because thats all that he saw me as.

I could possibly live through it. I actually had no idea if I would or not. But I wasn't about to let him go or ruin what we had already because I felt like being selfish. What kind of person would I be? The sky outside was grey, a thick cloud cover was hanging over us. Edward let go of me then and we strolled quietly down the grass hill past the cafeteria until we got to the parking lot. "You do this often?" I asked curiously. "What makes you think so?" he asked back, smirking.

"Oh, answering a question with a question. Suspicious." I teased, he grinned. I would never get over the fact that I achieved that smile. I was the one who gave it to him. "You're a pro at this, anyone would think you do it every day." I raised an eyebrow and nudged his arm playfully.

Unable to grasp a sense of reality when our skin came into contact. "—doesn't count." He said, smirking at me. Crap! Damn him, he did it again! My inner monologue screamed at me. So, instead of asking what he said, like an imbecile, I just nodded knowingly and smiled back.

I sighed, wondering when I'd be able to pay attention while simultaneously looking him in the eye. Probably never. Fuck. We rounded the corner, Edward came to a dead halt.

"Fuck!" he hissed. "What the hell happened?" he groaned, dashing down the concrete stairs. "What? What happened?" I asked, then didn't need the answer after I saw.

Edward's car, sleek, silver, magnificent. Was ruined. I staggered over to him as he knelt by the tyres. Slashed. "Oh, shit." I muttered lamely.

Edward laughed once without humour and shook his head. "I can't believe this." He murmured. I scanned the ransacked vehicle with my mouth hanging open. It appeared that all four tyres were slashed and torn at, the windshield was smeared with what looked like potato salad from lunch and there were profanities spray painted in green across every surface of the body. I looked over my shoulders, waiting to find my truck covered in mayonnaise.

But it was spotless, possibly even less dirty than this morning. I frowned, confused. Edward was now standing up, his hand stroking the roof.

"Carlisle won't be happy." He murmured, mostly to himself. I turned to face him and hesitantly put my hand on his arm.

"What kind of retards would just do your car? I mean, its the closest to the school, they had plenty of others..." I trailed off, seeing the look in his face. It dawned on me. "Mike?" I asked incredulously. "Newton." He finished, his voice a tone lower and more menacing. I bit my lip, torn between guilt and sympathy. "Edward, I'm so sorry—"

"Don't apologise, Bella." He scolded. I shut my mouth. He sighed and turned to me, shaking his head. "I don't care if he vandalised my car. He was being an asshole to you. I don't care what he does to me." I blinked, surprised, flattered and full of hope. Don't hope, I told myself.

That is not a smart thing to do. If you want to keep your sanity—what's left of it, you will not hope that this means anything. Because it doesn't, and I should know that, I was just setting myself up for heart break. The feeling I knew all to well. "Why don't you get a lift with me?" I offered, blushing. His eyebrows rose.

"Sure, okay. If that's alright with you." I nodded, a little to eagerly. He followed me to my truck. I reached over, unlocking his door. I felt so self-conscious, him seeing me in my natural setting—my 53 Chevy pickup. I smiled sheepishly and shoved the key in the ignition. It roared to life underneath us. I looked around then hastily pulled out of my parking space, turning on to the highway—with Edward, on my front seat.

Swoon.

***

"Where are you taking me?" Edward asked warily.

"Um, I don't know. I need directions. Which way to your house?" I asked.

He pointed behind him with his thumb. I rolled my eyes. "You could have told me. Now we have to make a U-turn. Ugh."

He chuckled. "Sorry, you just seemed so comfortable, I didn't want to wake you up out of your dream state." He admitted, staring out the window.

I blushed, not realising that he was watching me that intently. "Take this one." He instructed. "Now, go left." I blinked. "Where's your driveway...?" I asked, uncertain, slowing the truck to a crawl. "Right there." He pointed to a space between the expanses of trees. "Oh, well, anyone who couldn't see that is just...blind." I scoffed sarcastically.

He laughed. "Yeah, you get used to it." I spun into the driveway, it was long. It was really long. It was like a freaking landing strip. "How long is this thing?" I asked, exasperated. "It's never ending!" Edward just laughed some more. Finally, there was a break in the trees ahead, situated in a luscious green meadow, was a gigantic white house.

Restored from it's former dilapidation. It was..."Beautiful," I breathed, my eyes wide and unblinking as I stared out the windshield. "Holy crap," I croaked.

I stepped on the brake. I looked over to my side where Edward was watching me, with an amused expression. "What?" I asked, smiling. He shook his head. "Nothing. Do you...want to come inside?" he asked, glancing at me. I shrugged, trying to be casual and failing. "Okay." I nodded and grinned, excited that I was seeing the inside of Edward's house.

I felt like I might learn where all the magic happened, seeing his personal space seemed like such a personal thing to do. You had to know and trust someone to let them in your house. If a stranger showed up at the door—Charlie's rule still stuck even after I was eleven—I didn't let them inside, instead I told them I would leave a message for Charlie and bid them a goodbye. Most people around here were strangers to start with anyway.

I flung open my door, eager to explore the magnificent mansion that was Edward's home.

Edward's home. I was smiling goofily as I tried to slide out of my seat and onto the gravel driveway.

I hated that I was so clumsy. But, I had grown used to it, however, I had not grown used to someone catching me. Edward catching me in his arms. How many times had he done that now? He was my life preserve, my saviour. The loose gravel rolled under my shoe, I lost my grip and went flying. And, I shouldn't have squealed, Edward would have caught me anyway, because he was always catching me. In every sense of the word. He reached out in front of me.

"Whoah," he said, I could hear the smile in his voice. "Careful, okay?" he said, grabbing my hand and towing me up the porch steps. I felt so...shy and giddy. He got a key out of his pocket and unlocked the door. I gasped as I stepped over the threshold. "Holy mother of f..." I let the word trail off. Swearing in this house felt like swearing in a church. You felt really guilty, like you had vandalised it somehow, tainted it. I shut my mouth and gazed around in awe.

"You live here?" I asked incredulously. Edward just shrugged. I was shocked at his casualness. But then again, I had gathered that Edward wasn't really a material person. Objects didn't matter unless there was depth to them. Just like how people didn't matter if they were shallow.

I shook my head, lost for words. From the white walls to the crisp cream sofas. "It's amazing. I've never seen anything like it," I murmured. "Me either." Edward whispered. I don't think he meant for me to hear it. He was staring at me. I smiled and glanced around. "What do we do now?" I asked curiously, excitedly and completely nervous.

Wordlessly, he took me by the hand, my heart fluttered.

He walked me out the back door. The grass was pliable under my shoes, it was soft.

We were in the middle of the lawn. He stopped. Turning around, he grabbed both my hands.

We stared. His eyes, bright, his face, determined. Just breathe. Breathe.

I felt like I was on the edge of the cliff, this point. I could either step back, move away. Or I could plunge, into the unknown.

We just stared, not moving, my hands in his.

Just breathe.

His hand hesitantly moved to my cheek, cupping it as gently as the touch of a feather.

Breathe, breathe, breathe!

My cheeks burned. But our expressions didn't change. We didn't smile. We stayed staring. Intense.

His eyes flickered to my lips. I felt him, the energy between us.

My eyes stayed locked with his. We moved closer. His hand moved to my chin, holding it up.

The smouldering electricity was out of control. I was gone.

Our bodies were pressed against each other.

Breathe.

His breath brushed my face. Our lips inches apart.

Oh, god.

I breathed his scent in, closing my eyes.

Our lips met.

I no longer lived for just me.

Oh god. *tear* this was very emotional for me *sniff*. I love that last line. Tell me what you think. Love reviews! Thanks for reading. :)