Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, and the quote out of Wuthering Heights, is obviously Emily Bronte's. I would never claim her work as my own. I don't know shit about old english.

Oh, and any song ideas or suggestions that you think fit well with the story, just leave me a review. With this one, I like "Wherever you will go-The Calling" The words sortof go with the lines, but I mostly just suggest songs, coz thats what im listening to when I write it or because the melody suits the mood. :) Enjoy!

She stared, looking dazed and confused and most of all, hurt.

I gulped, reminding myself to go jump off a bridge. I had put that look on her face, the look of sheer devastation when I asked her to leave.

It was agony to watch. I had called out her name as she ran off, through the house and out the front door.

What have you done?! I had screamed at myself. I thought I had been giving Bella up, giving her up for her own good, knowing that she would only feel a little angry—but not hurt, not agonised. I had fallen to my knees, weak and pathetic, instead of running after her.

I did tell her to leave didn't I? I silently cursed myself, saying every bad word I knew, placing my name in the middle of them. I should write them all down to give to Bella, so she could verbally bash me, too. But, she wouldn't want to talk to me now. Not after I was so blatantly cold to her. I had finally done it, I had gotten rid of her, she left, without hesitation. I felt like she had taken part of me with her. I felt a hole in my chest, the place where she filled.

I fisted my hands into the lawn, pulling up clumps of grass and dirt. I threw them aside.

"Argh!" I growled. "You—What—Fuck!" I stuttered, frustrated.

I clawed at my face. "You idiot!" I scowled incredulously, my voice raising an octave.

I stood up, not bothering to wipe the dirt and grass off my clothes. I stumbled into the house, probably leaving dirty footprints.

I shrugged my jacket off and threw it, not knowing where it landed. I paced, not knowing what to do. I was so angry! How could I do that to her?

I was supposed to be her friend, I had forced her into that kiss. It was the shock that kept her from pulling away.

Once I had realised what the fuck I was doing, I was sickly reminded of how Jacob had forced her. Forced her into doing things. I would sooner die than be that man. Especially toward Bella. I stopped by the mirror and glowered at myself. "Well done. You stupid fuck." I muttered to my reflection.

I shook my head and leaned back against the wall it was mounted on. I saw the piano out of the corner of my eye. Grudgingly, I stalked over to it and slumped down on the bench. I had been playing with the idea of writing a song for Bella. But then how would that look? Friends didn't exactly write songs for each other, and if they did, they weren't complex pieces of memorised piano playing. My fingers ghosted over the keys, letting the notes flow out of my head and through my hands. The melody enveloped the entire room, echoing off the walls. I closed my eyes, keeping my fingers moving. I pictured Bella in my head. The music fit with her so perfectly.

It was inspired by her. The playful, smiling Bella in my imagination shifted. It shifted to the miserable, anguished Bella I had seen in my back yard.

I stopped and thumped my fist on the keys. A heavy, unpleasant and loud echo of out of tone notes resulted.

I flinched. I started again, I didn't know why, but it was helping me. It was as if I could almost forget what had happened this afternoon.

Almost. But it would take a lot more than music to make me forget that kiss. I had taken her face in my hands, our lips meeting for a brief few seconds, although it felt like much longer. She was in my arms, she was mine. No, she wasn't. She wasn't mine, nor should she be. But that didn't stop me from wanting her to be, for needing her to be. Carlisle interrupted my silent pining as the front door clicked closed. My playing came to a halt, the room fell into silence.

"Edward?" he called, rounding the corner, his face brightened up. "You're playing?" He asked, disbelieving.

I nodded solemnly. Then he noticed the look on my face. "What's troubling you?" he asked softly, fatherly.

I wanted to kick myself again. I didn't deserve Carlisle as a father—foster parent, whatever. He gave me everything. I shouldn't have everything. I shouldn't have anything. But, then again, I had everything, and I threw it away like yesterdays trash. Or had I even had it?

Bella certainly didn't see me that way, so in fact, I didn't have it. But just the feeling, of having her in my life. Period.

Was better than now. Far better. It was everything. I shook my head. "Just petty teenage dramas, Carlisle." I smiled sheepishly.

My teenage drama wasn't petty though, but I didn't expect Carlisle to understand the real love I felt for Bella. Teenagers couldn't fall in love, apparently.

He smiled. "Girl problems?" he asked. I shrugged. "Well, I don't expect you would want me to give you advice...but here it is." He started. I almost laughed.

"This girl, if she's been the one behind you acting so different this past week..." He shook his head.

"You just make sure you don't ruin it." He advised. Too late, I was about to muter. "Because," he went on.

"I've never seen you so...alive. When you got here, you were empty. Whoever it was, whatever she's been doing to make you that happy? You better hope you don't lose it. Believe me, you'll regret it your whole life. If you don't make amends now..." he trailed off, letting his sentence hand in the air between us.

I was speechless. Carlisle was so caring and passionate, and so insightful. He knew his stuff, yet another reason why he was too good for me. I smiled, he smiled back, walking past me and giving me a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. I glared out the windows, it was raining. I mustn't have been able to tell with all my playing. It was also dark, and I was hungry. What time was it? I stood up and slowly paced around, tripping over my book bag. I grunted then bent to retrieve it.

I scowled as its contents fell out and scattered across the wooden floor boards.

"Fucking book bags," I sighed and got down on my knees, gathering my books onto my lap.

I encountered my copy of Wuthering Heights. I touched the cover and gently placed it on top. Then as I was about to stand, another copy of the same book caught my eye, just under the coffee table near the stairs. Huh? Since when did I have two? It was old, fragile. I lifted the hard cover.

Property of Bella Swan. I sucked in a breath and opened it to where she had it dog eared.

"That, however, which you may suppose the most potent to arrest my imagination, is actually the least, for what is not connected with her to me? and what does not recall her? I cannot look down to this floor, but her features are shaped on the flags! In every cloud, in every tree—filling the air at night, and caught by glimpses in every object by day, I am surrounded with her image! The most ordinary faces of men and women—my own features—mock me with a resemblance. The entire world is a dreadful collection of memoranda that she did exist, and that I have lost her!"

I stared at the words printed there. Heathcliffe's words.

It mocked me with the similarities to my own life. I was stupid, selfish, like Heathcliffe, and her face—Bella's face is the only one I will see for the rest of my life.

I will have known her, known she was with me, known she existed and known that I had lost her. I slammed the book on the floor and stood up, planning on how I would set this straight. I ran outside, yelling. "Carlisle, I'm going out!" I called. "Okay! Just be careful!" He shouted out of his office window. I set off, only just remembering I had no car.

"Fuck! Shit!" I swore, standing on the porch. "Fuck it!" I muttered, jumping off the porch and into the sheeting, heavy rain. I had only my shirt on, no jacket.

And it was freezing, I'll admit. I wasn't bulletproof. But I ran. I ran, my legs not growing tired at all, I remained determined. I needed to see her, and now. I picked up the pace, racing down along the side of the highway. Dangerous, yes. But did I care? Nope.

I had made it to the outskirts of Forks. It was only about another mile to Bella's house.

The winding streets were hard to work with in the dark. I found the connecting street to Bella's house.

It was like the home stretch. "Finally!" I croaked, breathless. I found her house.

She had informed me of her address. We were planning on doing our English together one day after school. She joked about how her father put a baseball bat in her bedroom in case someone climbed into her window at night. Thats how I knew which one was hers.

I cringed at the thought of a baseball bat to the face, but instead of being a pussy, I scaled the side of her house, using a tree as leverage. I reached the top branch, it was sturdy enough. My heart was beating so loudly, through the exhaustion and the thought of being outside Bella's room.

What if she never forgave me? What if I had to live like this forever? I swallowed the fear, then tried to lean over to the window sill.

My hand banged on the glass, vibrating the frame. "Shit," I hissed. I managed to pry it open, heaving myself through the small opening, my shoulders almost got stuck. I heard a loud thump that wasn't me, the next thing I know, a large square text book was flying toward my face.

Well, thats a step up from the baseball bat. I ducked, just in time mind you. I sucked in a breath, the giant brick of a book slammed against the wall where my head had been. "Bella!" I whispered, she dropped the book immediately—onto her toe.

"Argh!" She growled, hopping on one leg. It should have been amusing, but I was more concerned. "What are you doing here?" she demanded, out of breath, her voice shaky.

"Bella," I sighed, brushing her cheek with the back of my hand, I couldn't help it, her skin was blushed. She swatted my hand away, obviously pissed. I would be too.

"What the hell are you doing?" she hissed, shocked.

She wouldn't let me touch her now. The one male she trusted enough to let him touch her, had ruined her, all over again.

I glared at the wall behind her. "What the hell am I doing?" I repeated. "Being selfish. Being stupid. Doing all the wrong things." I admitted, truthfully.

I was doing the wrong thing by being so selfish and coming here. But it was also so right. "Please don't do this," she begged. My eyes widened. Do what? I stared, confused.

"Please don't do this to me." She mumbled, tears coursing down her face. "Do what?" I asked, puzzled. My voice was pained, begging her to tell me what to do, what she wanted so I could give it to her. "Just—just don't do this!" she whispered, agonised and pleading. She was motioning with her hand to me and to her. I caught her hand with mine.

Do what?! I knew she didn't want me, but she couldn't know how much I was in love with her, nobody could. Yet, she did see through me. I was so scared she would hate me and tell me to leave. But if she asked, I would oblige. Because I had to give her it, give her everything she wanted. She deserved it. "I'll tell you what it is." I continued.

"This," I told her, placing her hand on my chest, just over my heart. My shirt was soaked through, it was sticking to my skin, I was dripping wet, but I didn't care.

My mind was in a whirlwind. Her breathing hitched, her eyes glassy. If I didn't tell her, I would go insane.

I would be reminded of her every single day for the rest of my life, knowing I had lost her...so I told the truth. "Bella, I. Need. You." I stated simply, emphasising each word. My heart beat jumped, waiting for some sort of reaction. She stayed motionless. So I leaned closer to her. I could smell her, she always smelled like strawberries. I could feel the warmth of her body, so close to me. "I need you, to breathe. You are who I live for everyday." I admitted, my veins about to burst with the electricity surging through them.

"I love you." I said, my voice strong and clear.

***

We stood there, motionless. We stared, not saying a word. Our breathing had slowed, her hand was still on my heart.

She seemed to let out a breath she was holding for a while. She glanced down to her fingers splayed across my chest under my pale hand.

She frowned, her mouth turning down, her lip trembling. I took the necessary step forward to be closer to her. Her hand slipped out from under mine, feeling like she had reached into my chest than ripped it out. She stared at her hand. I watched her, wondering what was going to happen next.

She looked up at me then, gazing intensely. My heart stopped for a second. Was this goodbye? Was this when I had to let go?

"You're lying." She accused softly. I went wild.

"Lying?" I said through my teeth. "Lying?" I said, hardly any volume to my incredulous voice.

I fell to my knees and took her hands, practically begging, but I didn't care. I would beg, I would beg till my knees bled.

"You!" I said. "You are my life now."

She let out a little whimper, dropping to her knees too.

"Please don't say those things if you don't mean them. I can't lose you. I can't lose this. I'd suffocate, I won't be able to breathe." She stressed. I shook my head, not leaving her eyes. I raised my hands to her face and felt relieved. She closed her eyes, fresh tears streaming. "I've never been so sure in my life. I've never been as sure about anything as I am about you." She smiled through her tears, opening her eyes, her hands were on my arms.

"Life makes no sense," she sniffed. "Life has been cruel, I've been broken. You saved me." She whispered, pained.

"It makes sense now." She was staring out the window, her eyes met my anxious ones.

"I love you, too." She admitted, not blushing, but determined. I stared wide-eyed. There was a cosmic shift. The Earth's rotations came to a halt.

She loved me. Nobody could take this away from me. I closed the distance between us, needing more of her. Needing her more than oxygen.

Our lips met. I felt her hands wrap around my neck, her fingers combing through my hair. I thought maybe this could be a dream. Nothing this good could come to me?

Right?

Maybe I was already dealt my punishment. I had been moments from destruction, Bella's finger on the red button. One small push and that was it, utter cataclysmic obliteration. I would never be the same. Our lips were moving frantically.

She leaned closer to me, my hands moved to her waist, pulling her to me. Her tears were splashing on my face. Her lips were so soft and warm, her clothes were getting wet because of me. I had trailed wet, muddy footprints on her floor. Our lips finally broke apart, and we just stared at each other.

She looked at me like she had won the freaking lottery. She didn't know just how lucky I was. It wasn't everyday you got to share a kiss with an angel.

She put her head on my shoulder and kissed my neck gently. I sighed in content. I could sit here forever, I mused, to myself. After a while, it must have been over half an hour that we sat there, Bella hesitantly stood up, pulling me up with her. I glanced over my shoulder, dreading the thought of leaving.

"What is it?" she asked, putting a hand to my face. I held it there with my hand. "I'm terrified of jumping out that window and never seeing you again." I sighed.

"Then, don't go." She said simply, like the idea was completely obvious.

I didn't say anything as she pulled me to the bed. I kicked my shoes off then my shirt. She paused, then averted her eyes. I tip-toed over to the other side of the bed. She was kneeling, the covers pushed back. She grabbed my hand again and I lay down next to her. She leant forward and retrieved the blankets, pulling them over us.

I turned my body in her direction. She turned her head and stared. She closed her eyes.

I couldn't fall asleep, I watched her—Bella sleep. It was fascinating. I lay on my back and tried to imagine how I got here.

I smiled to myself. Bella stirred then, rolling over, her right arm hugging my torso, her face on my chest. I held my breath, then relaxed, draping my arm over her shoulders. I drifted off peacefully, the first peaceful night of sleep I had had in months.

My Bella and I.

:O:O:O:O:O OMG. Hehehe. Dude, don't you just love Carlisle? And don't you just love Edward? And his revelations? Broken, jealous, oblivious Edward is so hot right now.

Thanks for Review guys. Very encouraging feedback. THIS IS MY LONGEST CHAPTER SO FAR! 3,000 words. and i've gotten like over a thousand hits on this story. So anyways, you guys (my readers) complete me.