Discaimer: I do not own Twilight.
:) Thanks for your previous reviews! AND, to Meg and Twig. You guys review me alot, so i just wanted to say ANOTHER thankyou and **puffy heart**
You are the cream to my coffee. ;)
I had driven along this road many times.
I knew it, because I remembered the name of the street. But I felt confused.
I felt lost, like I was losing my purpose every inch I travelled. Something was holding me back...shouting my name.
I squinted my eyes tightly shut. This eerie sensation was overcoming me. But what could it mean?
I had lived my entire life with a mind that could read people, know things that they didn't even say...but this feeling went beyond that. It was so strong.
I needed to follow it. Edward. A voice in my head choked. It wasn't the normal voice, it wasn't my voice at all.
I would know this voice from miles underground, it was the voice that was in my dreams. This voice had whispered my name, cried my name, yelled my name. It was the voice that lured me. But this voice. This voice had an edge. And edge of fear, of terror, of pleading. "Bella." I whispered. Before my mind worked, my body worked.
I wrenched on the gear shift, pulling it into reverse. I flew backwards, finding a wide enough part of road to turn around in. My whole body was being drawn forward with every turn towards her. It yanked at my heart, hauling me further. I didn't know what I was doing, or if all my brooding was turning me insane.
But I had to go to her. It wasn't a want, more a need, it was definitely something that I needed to do, like I had been given a silent order from no-one in particular. My whole body was aching, not only because of the desperation. It felt like I had been beaten. Panic was setting in. Something was extremely wrong.
I didn't care if I was acting crazy. Nothing else mattered anymore. It was like my head had been cleared of anything but her.
The need was growing stronger, my breathing sped up, as did my pulse. I roared around the corner connecting with Bella's street.
I felt my heart stop, a feeling of pure dread flooding through my veins at the sight of another car in her driveway.
My tyres screeched to a halt as I stepped on the brakes. I was two houses down, the shock stopped me flat. I almost took the door of the fucking car. I darted toward her house, my throat stinging with every laboured breath. "Bella," I choked, strangled with fear. My feet came into contact with the gravel within seconds.
I had never run so fast in my life. I paused at her door, peering through the glass window. A surreal feeling came over me. I was robotic. My foot lifted by itself, connecting with the wooden door, the hinges completely bent, tearing away from the frame. It flew into the house, hitting the stair case, the wood splintering in shards across the floor.
My eyes searched, my feet flying through to the living room. I could feel the numbness, the robotic feeling, it was wearing.
The panic and anxiety and dread and anger was surging around me like a gigantic tidal wave. My eyes made purchase. The face, her face. She was lying on the floor, the rest of her body obscured by another body. Her eyes were wide open...glazed over. Hands around her neck disappeared, leaving a dark bruise where they had been.
Anger...rage, such powerful emotions. They were labels, anger, you were angry, rage...that was worse. Fury was the worst—until now. He had beaten her, his body on top of hers, her eyes unseeing...blank. Her stared up at me, looking shocked. I didn't have to even try. My foot thrust into his face. Blood spattered across the room, his head snapping back.
His body collapsed onto the floor, falling away from Bella. She still lay motionless. I had failed. I understood now.
My punishment had been dealt. Now it was his turn. I jumped over the back of the couch, my hands grabbing a fistful of hair, pulling it out at the roots. A growl of pain and fury slipped from his lips. There was no turning back...I could never go back—never. I had so much strength, considering how weak I was.
Adrenalin caused people to do amazing things. I hoped it was enough. I hadn't even realised he had been hitting me, but I spat out some blood, more dribbled from my mouth.
I stared back at him with a detached sort of hate. It was like my hate threshold had been overdone. I had no more room, so my mind had made new compartment in my body. I was numb, my body moved on its own now. But I could still feel everything.
I ran forward, tackling him into the ground, a tortured roar came from deep in my chest. I hadn't realised I could make that noise.
I pushed him backwards into a glass coffee table. He cried out, glass puncturing his back and my arms. He tried struggling away.
"No." I said quietly. "See how you like it." I stated, pulling on his shirt and shoving him in the other direction. Once he was on the ground, I kicked him again. My shoes cracking the bones in his torso. Blood spurted from his mouth, his eyes were half closed. I kicked his jaw, his head whipping backwards.
His arms went limp, his eyes closed. I wasn't sure what he was—unconscious or dead. I hope for the latter. I limped over to her then. The detached feeling dissolved and I could feel everything. "Bella." I whispered. I fell to my knees by her side, her head was lolled to the other side, facing away from me. I couldn't see her eyes, her expression.
That was probably best, I don't think my mind or my heart would stay intact after staring into her dead eyes. My life lay before me. And she was gone.
This was the end of her—the end of me—the end of everything. Existence...was moot. My brain couldn't comprehend anything beyond now. My shaking hands reached for her, her bloody shirt, torn, her hair matted with sticky crimson. My arms wrapped around her still form. "Bella!" my anguished voice cried.
"No, no, no, no, no." I sucked in a breath. But what was the point? Breathing gave life...mine was gone. I didn't have the need to.
I had been right about one thing. Living through this? Surviving again? It wasn't going to happen. My survival only involved her. I held her to my chest, I could feel her warm body against mine. I sat knelt, pulling her closer to me, her limp arms at her sides. The diamond on her wrist sparkled in the dim light...the facets mocking me with their lively glistening.
Tears. Hot and wet splattered against her face. My lips pressed against her cheek, kissing across her face. "Bella," I whimpered against her skin.
Every part of me hurt, every part of me was in searing agony. My hands grabbed anxiously at her clothes, afraid of what I already knew. "Bella, please." I begged.
"Take me instead!" I yelled upward. I closed my eyes, breathing her in for the last time. I sat there, sobbing over Bella—the dead love of my life.
After a moment, I paused and decided to talk. To tell her something. "Bella?" No answer. "I've been keeping a secret of my own from you." I said.
Don't let it win. Her voice told me. I obliged.
"My parents. They died a year ago." I gulped.
"I had asked my mother to buy me a new book. Wuthering Heights. I'm sure you know it. So, she said okay. She took my father with her." I shook my head. "On the way home, their car collided with another. They were alive for a few minutes after the paramedics got there. But..." I took a deep breath.
"Their injuries were too horrific. Apparently my mother told one of the police officers to tell me to take care of myself. She was always thinking of me, never about herself. Everything that was in the car with them as damaged. Except for the book." I told her. "My book. The one I asked my mother to go and buy. It was my fault. And now this is my fault." I squeezed her body again. "I'm so sorry." I whispered, closing my eyes again.
"For what?" she said in a broken whisper.
I reeled. I frantically reached my hand over to her face, turning it towards me.
"What?" I breathed...my mind filled with hope. Her eyes were still blank, her mouth closed. I let out an agonised sob, burying my face in her neck.
"I said, 'for what?'" My eyes widened, pulling back cautiously to stare at her face. She was looking up at me then, her eyes focussed on mine.
I thought I might pass out with relief. I was relief, relief so strong it border-lined on pain. Like when you have a tourniquet around your arm, the sensation of the blood flowing back. My life was flowing back. Now, everything mattered. "Bella!" I whispered.
"Edward," she breathed, smiling slightly. She closed her eyes, sighing. "Hey!" I almost shouted. "Hey, don't close your eyes, okay?" I pleaded with her, her brow furrowed and her lips pouted slightly.
"Why?" she croaked, her voice barely audible. "Because. You can't. You have to stay. Stay with me." Her eyes fluttered open. "I'll try," she mouthed.
"Okay. We need to get you out of here..." I glanced around anxiously. This battle wasn't over. Bella coughed and spluttered, dots of blood spotted around her mouth.
I tried to swallow the lump in my throat, the incapacitating fear that she wouldn't make it. "Where does it hurt most?" I asked urgently. Her breathing was shallow, laboured. I turned her body so she was lying on her side. "Sweetheart," I choked. "My ribs, my head." She mumbled, spitting out blood. "And...my hand," she added. I glanced down at what I had missed.
She had a deep gash along her palm. It was bleeding profusely, running in macabre ribbons of scarlet down her fingers.
"Hold on." I ordered her. "Just, hold on." I gingerly slid out from under her, frightened of causing her any more pain.
My clothes were drenched with blood, my hands were slippery with it. I found Bella's phone—it was shattered in pieces across the living room. "Fuck!" I muttered. I slid down to my knees. "I'm going to have to pick you up, Bella." I said regretfully. "No!" she protested weakly. "It hurts," she whimpered.
"I know, I know." I looked away, trying not to lose it. I was gathered enough to do this one thing. I needed to save her. She saved me, now I had to return the favour.
I tried as hard as I could not to jolt her, but I had to work as fast as I could. I had her in my arms then, I straightened my legs until I was standing with her in my arms.
She let out a little sob. "Hurry," she pleaded, tears running down her cheeks, mixing with the blood already there. I swiftly strode to my car, managing to open the door without putting her down. Her arms hung limp at her sides, but her eyes stayed open, mostly. I lifted her in, laying her down, letting the back of the passenger seat recline so she wouldn't have to bend her torso. I kissed her on the forehead, praying she would stay awake—praying I didn't fail again.
I darted around the front of the car, jumping in, not bothering with a seat belt. I flawed it down the highway, reaching the glaring bright lights of Forks hospital quicker than I thought possible. My heart was hammering in my ears, my face was sweaty and bloody, my clothes were, too. But Bella was doing worse.
Her hair was sticking to her face with the blood, she was breathing in quick, shallow pants, her hand shaking. Her eyes were closed. "Come on, Bella." I demanded. "Open your eyes, come on!" I touched her face, cupping her cheek. She wouldn't respond—she was fading, rapidly.
I grabbed onto her, pulling her out of the car. I had parked in the ambulance bay, just outside of the ER where I knew Carlisle was working tonight.
He was the best—I only wanted the best for Bella. Anyone else would never be good enough to take care of her properly. But I knew some people just couldn't be saved. I knew this. But, Bella? No. Like I said, the battle wasn't over, not yet. Without looking back or closing the doors,
I strode in, Bella's head lolling, her arms and legs limp, her breath slowing. I stepped into the fluorescent light, the people here stared, shocked. I didn't break stride. I walked straight past those people, past the administrator who looked sick at the sight of Bella—she could possibly know her.
"Come on, Bella. It's not that much further." I told her while I walked briskly, as quickly as I could without doing her more damage.
"Open your eyes!" I hissed, jogging through the automatic glass doors and into the ER itself. I searched the room. "Carlisle!" I shouted. He appeared from behind a curtain, looking surprised, seeing me and the almost-dead Bella in my arms then paling, his eyes widening.
"Quick! I need you!" I found an empty bed and placed her down. "What happened?" he demanded, his hands probing over her expertly. I grabbed Bella's hand, grasping it with all my strength. "Jacob Black." I whispered. He frowned, confused but kept working.
"Can we get a crash cart in here?" he ordered a nurse. She nodded, running off and bringing back a trolley with a big yellow and black machine on it. "Where is she hurt the worst, exactly?" His fingers reached her ribs then and she didn't make a sound.
"Bella, wake up." I choked. He lifted up her shirt, seeing the bruising, his jaw dropped. "Someone did this to her?" he asked. I nodded, still staring at her motionless face. I sucked in a breath, blinking the tears away. Carlisle hovered over her other side, more nurses came to aid, another doctor too, looking shocked and appalled at what they saw.
"Edward, I need you to do me a favour and go." He said, his voice full of calm authority, but I knew he was worried. I glared up at him.
"No, I can't just leave her—" I objected, my chest aching. "You need to see someone, too. You're hurt. I can't be distracted with you here." He said, eyeing me before placing a needle into Bella's arm. Another person was inserting a tube down her throat, others were trying to stop the bleeding.
"Carlisle—" "Do you want me to save her life?" he questioned, knowing the answer and using it against me.
I leant down then, kissing her cheek, my other hand brushing the hair back from her forehead.
"I love you." I sobbed, before backing away, another doctor pushed me aside, trying to sit me down on the bed on the opposite side of the room. I sat down, not taking my eyes off her. They worked and worked. I stared. "Her father," I said abruptly. "You need to call the Chief of Police."
I told whoever the person was who was treating me. "She is his daughter." I clarified, tears still running.
"He needs to know." He glanced over his shoulder, motioning for a nurse to come to him. "Please get on the phone to Chief Swan. Tell him his daughter is here." She nodded, gave me a worried glance and turned back away, jogging briskly over to the admin desk. I barely even felt the stitches, or the needle. No pain compared.
They were talking in swift voices, working as fast as they could to make her better. Carlisle snapped out some orders. I had never seen him in his element before. He was so in control. I was glad he was here...taking care of her...taking care of my life that lay in the bed next to him.
"He's in shock," someone murmured, like I wasn't here. "We should sedate him." Another suggested. I whipped my head around furiously.
"No." I said through gritted teeth. "I want to be awake." I seethed, turning back around to watch, but someone had pulled the curtain closed, cutting off my view.
"What's going on?" I demanded.
"I want to see her—" "Bella?" Charlie called from the entrance, looking around frantically.
He glanced in my direction and did a double take. He darted over to me. "Edward? What's going on? Where is she?" I glanced at the closed curtain, wishing it wasn't there.
Had I just had my last glimpse of her alive?
"Jacob Black." I said. He frowned, looking frustrated and confused.
"Take it up with him. He's responsible." I muttered darkly, hoping he was still lying in a pool of blood in Charlie's house.
"She's in there," I pointed, pulling my hands back and clawing at my face anxiously. "I need to see her," I said. Charlie's expression was panic stricken.
He walked over to the curtains and took a peek inside. "Oh god!" He choked, covering his mouth and looking away. A doctor came out then, leaving a small gap in the curtains but not enough. I stood up, someone's hand came down on my shoulder. "Get off me. I'm Carlisle's son." I growled. They let go. I went over to Charlie and the doctor.
He sighed, his face plain. He tore off a set of bloody gloves and I thought I was going to be sick. Another nurse walked out, and another, ripping off gloves.
"Bella," I whispered. "Oh no," I held my stomach with my hand, needing something to lean on.
"What's going on?" me and Charlie both demanded at the same time. The doctor stared up at us regretfully.
When he didn't answer I staggered around him, feeling my injuries now after the adrenaline had worn off. I stumbled past him, yanking the curtain open to find her lying there.
"Bella..." I whispered again, tears running.
:D Loving the reviews. I like to know I can make people cry :) I mean, in a totally deep, intense way not a mean way, of course ;)