I Must Be Living Wrong

Disclaimer: The characters used herein belong exclusively to Charlaine Harris, and they are just playing in my sandbox for a short time.

A/N: My thanks to everyone who has sent messages, given reviews, and/or read I Must Be Living Wrong. It's been wonderful hearing from you. I hope you continue to enjoy my efforts.

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Chapter 5

Eric was a riot! He said the most unexpected things sometimes, and his command of the local vernacular was impressive, and a testament to the adept predator he was. Know your prey-Vampire 101. Blend in…But "Ah, sookie, now?" I couldn't stop myself from laughing with him. He had jokes, this one thousand plus year old Viking sex addict. His surprising sense of humor was one of the things I liked about him; well, that, his award-winning butt, and the fact that he got me. And when he laughed like this, in the intimacy of my room, and my bed, he was irresistible. Did I stand a chance? Had I ever?

"You should laugh more, my lover," he told me, as he caught me up into another kiss that began teasingly with just an enticing brush of his lips against mine, the soft glide of his tongue around mine. He perused my mouth as if he had all the time in the world, and he'd discovered a remembered delicacy he thought never to sample again. And then as mercurial as Eric himself, the kiss changed, and was rolling into me, hard and demanding, his lips plundering, taking everything I had, until he robbed me of thought, and left my mind muzzy, my lips bruised and wanting…

Eric was truly gifted, no doubt about it.

When he broke the kiss, slightly tugging at my lower lip until I opened my eyes, my body was quivering and his eyes were sultry, and at half mast. He settled his head onto his arm on the pillow beside me, our eyes near level, mere inches apart. With a low growl, he tucked his body even more tightly into my curves, his gracious plenty declaring its joy at our proximity, and its willingness to pick up where the kiss had left off. Almost absently his hips moved against me, and I closed my eyes for a second, enjoying the heavy intimate feel of him. In my hazy state, he overwhelmed me, and his left arm went around my waist, his hand palming the outline of my hip beneath the cover, his thumb tenderly stroking the ridge of the bone. Yum…

Eric had never made a secret of his desire for me. He wanted to be as close as possible to me, it seems, when he wasn't trying to get in me, that is. He often caught me off-guard with a gentle stroke of his hands against my bare skin, or that cat-like rub of his cheek against mine that was usually accompanied by a contented purr. The crazy thing is that I had come to like it, too- long for it, even. How I had missed it…him…

I reached up and tucked a lock of his long hair behind his ear, letting my hand linger along his hair-roughened jawline. The bond between us was invitingly warm, and replete with a sense of lazy satisfaction-that would be me. The other emotions were harder to distinguish, but anxiety, and an edgy hunger, filtered through. Eric, of course.

Damn it, he was distracting me! Sneaky bastard. I sobered, frowning slightly. He'd sexed me up for hours and was still angling for more; no wonder I couldn't think properly! My question had been: Where the hell was he the last few months? He needed to answer that and what was up with: I should laugh more? Life hadn't given me much to cackle about, these last few years, outside of tonight, and a few brief moments in between- many with Eric; betrayal has a way of taking the laughter right out of you, and spoiling the memories.

Eric watched me intently, as my thoughts paraded across my features and he moved his hand upward to smooth away the frown lines on my forehead, his touch tender, feather-light. It was almost hypnotic…

"You try getting shot, clawed, staked, beaten, kicked, drained, mauled, and nearly burnt alive and then we'll talk about "happy" Sookie," I countered. Not to mention nearly blown up, I added silently. His eyebrows rose and his eyes narrowed as he hrumphed. Was that even a word? It was definitely the noise he made. "I would have been happier if I had known what was going on with you."

His nose went up slightly and the arrogant Viking surfaced. There's my boy. "Sookie, you seem to be a magnet for creatures with violent tendencies and grudges. I've never seen one human so ill-used by Fate. I've lived relatively unscathed this last century, until I met you, of course. You've added a lot of excitement to my life and we must be certain to pay your insurance premiums on time, my lover. As for what was happening with me, I was about the business of staying alive and keeping my people so."

No he didn't.

It was hard to fight all cozied up as we were, but I intended to give it a shot, tilting my head back slightly. There were some things that still smarted like hell, and he'd unintentionally hit on one. "I'm so glad that being around me has spiced things up for you Eric!" He smiled and rocked his hips into me, and I stuttered. "I...I wasn't an insurance nightmare, Mr. High and Mighty, until I got mixed up with Bill and you all. I had never even been to the hospital! I got in my first fight the night I met Bill, and then I got nearly killed the next. I should have caught on then, and stayed the hell away from y'all. Who knew getting my butt kicked would have been the start of a trend!"

"You wouldn't have met me. Or at least, not for awhile," he offered soothingly, dangling his words as though they were a treat, and rubbing his gracious plenty against me-definitely a treat!

Not biting. I was warming up. "And what has that got me? You didn't even want to face me after you found out you'd offered to marry me-a human-and give up being the Sheriff of Area 5. I haven't heard from you. You left me just like Bill did…" As soon as the words passed my lips, I knew I'd said too much.

Did I say that Eric was mercurial? I did not do him justice.

His face darkened, all playfulness gone, and he rose swiftly and leaned over me in the bed, placing a hand to either side of my head. He lowered his head and bared his fangs. "Lover, he and I are Vampire; there it ends. Do not presume that because Bill once shared your bed, that we are similar. I have been honest with you, and rest assured that I would never simper about you like a whipped dog for your attention." He paused letting his words sink in, my mind absorb the anger that was pinging off the bond, and him.

"You are human, and your mortality, disturbing. Yet, I have never left you, though I could have, and perhaps should have." He shook his head as though he were trying to make the thought go away. "I chose to be with you, yet you have chosen others over me, again and again. No more."

He was right, but I was kind of mad right, now. How dare he get fangy with me! "You didn't step up to the plate, Eric, and I didn't want to be alone! Caring about me was beneath you."

He glowered at me and practically snarled. "Step up to the plate? What is this plate? If I hadn't cared for you, you'd be a memory right now, dear one, or in thrall to every deviant desire of Andre's. And if you didn't care, I would have died in the Pyramid of Gizeh hotel. But instead of talking to me about the why's, you do this-attempt to anger me! Or you waste your emotions on other, lesser men, mere physical distractions, and find it necessary to spout this bullshit about plates when things get tough and I want to talk about us."

"Us? We haven't been us since you regained your memory! That's it, Eric. Let me up." I was shaking and I didn't care about the truth in his words. I scooted up in the bed and pushed against his rock-hard chest, the quilt gripped tightly in one hand, as I attempted to cover myself. He didn't even try to peek; I was definitely in trouble.

He didn't move.

I shoved again, and the bond went ballistic. I was bombarded with a wave of unmistakable anger, and I knew a moment of fear, before I responded with a little anger of my own.

I said the only thing I could think of to get rid of an angry vampire, though I was torn due to the way my body still echoed with his touch. "I rescind your invitation."