A/N: My many thanks to Kristine for her amazing beta skills. You rock!

Also break out your tissues boxes everyone and get ready for an emotional ride.

Zoey's eyes closed as the heavenly scent of apple blossoms dissipated around us. In a comfortable silence we all said our goodbyes to our friend, our referee, our roommate, and our beloved country girl.

"Zoey, sweetheart, you have to let her go," Damien's voice spoke softly after what felt like hours. I paid special attention to Zoey's still body as she sat on the hospital bed cradling Stevie Rae in her arms.

Shaunee spoke up next, but still no movement. Erin chimed in as she usually does and yet nothing from Zoey. Zoey's body was unmoving but peaceful, her eyes still closed, and she made no attempt to let go of Stevie Rae.

I lightly brushed my hand from her shoulder, down her back, and then back up quietly pleading with her to open her eyes - still nothing.

Damien announced softly to call forth the elements to help her. One by one they called on their elements to abet Zoey, to help my Z.

Once they each called their element, it was blaringly obvious that there was still one element missing.

With a sudden urge to state to obvious I clearly pointed out, "There's still one more element needed in the circle."

"But Zoey always manifests spirit," Damien said sympathetically.

I put my hand back on her shoulders, while bringing my other hand and placing it on the other side of her shoulder. "Right now Zoey can't manifest anything by herself. Let's give her some help." As soon as my words were spoken I felt a leap in my chest, just like the one when I first saw Zoey in the hallway over a month ago. I knew Nyx was with me and I just prayed to her that, through me, I could help manifest spirit to aid our dear Zoey.

"I have no affinity for these things, but I do care about what happens to Zoey, and she has been gifted with an affinity for all five elements. So I, along with all of her friends, ask that the element spirit help her wake up so that she can get over the death of her best friend." I gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. I felt her intake a deep breath as her eyes slowly opened.

Thank you Nyx, for everything.

"Zoey! You're back with us!" Damien cried.

My eyes looked past a teary eyed Damien towards Neferet, who gave me a beseeching look, knowing Zoey needed to release Stevie Rae's body.

"Z, you're going to need to let go of Stevie Rae now," I spoke tenderly. My hand fell from her shoulder, down her arm, to the forearm that still cradled Stevie Rae's head.

Her gaze moved from Damien to me. It was the first time she looked directly at me since we heard Stevie Rae's first cough. My breathing became rapid as my heart sunk into the pit of my stomach at the sight in front of me. Her eyes were red and swollen and on the verge of another round of tears. Her face was tear-stained, her full lips pale and turned down into a frown. She looked painfully sad. I would do anything to ease her pain. I wanted to wipe away all those tears and reassure her everything was going to be alright. I wanted to hold her in my arms for as long as it took to comfort her. I would do anything to see her smile again.

She didn't say anything; instead her gaze flitted to each of her friends, finally resting on Stevie Rae peaceful face. She looked down at her friend, a fresh round of tears brewing.

"Z, you have to let her go," I said gently, leaning into her again, my head just inches away from hers.

Finally she spoke. "But I told her I'd stay with her," her voice was scratchy and faint. Her eyes bore into mine. I fought back the tears that were forcing their way to the surface. I had to be strong for her.

In a calm voice I whispered, "You did. You stayed with her the whole time. She's gone now, so there's nothing else you can do." Another tear streamed down her face as I spoke pulling and tugging at my heart once again.

Each of her friends offered their own words of encouragement in hopes of convincing her to let go of Stevie Rae.

In a soft, strained voice she whispered, "Okay, but… but I don't know how to let her go."

Neferet stepped forward with outstretched arms. "I'll take her from you Zoeybird." Her beautiful face held many emotions - sadness, compassion, love, and strength as she used Zoey's nickname. Zoey only nodded her head as Neferet cradled Stevie Rae's body as if she were holding a newborn baby and pulled her out of Zoey's bloodied lap.

As if the weight had been lifted from her chest, Zoey's head fell down to her now empty lap. She sat there for only a minute while examining her dress. Her brows pulled together in thought. I inched closer to her, waiting for the tears. I knew it was a matter of minutes, if not seconds. This look was common when she needed to get away, to be alone, or talk to Stevie Rae. Except now she didn't have her roommate to talk to or to help her work through her problems. I secretly hoped she would confide in me like she did when we first met under the tree. She could always talk to me, but I knew she needed her friend.

With surprising speed, she spun her legs around to the edge of the bed and attempted to stand. As she fell back to the bed, all four sets of hands were on her once again, balancing her until she could stand. My hand clung to her arm as the other one in place at her lower back, ready to pick her up if needed.

Neferet whispered instructions to Shaunee, handing her a vile from her pocket to help Zoey sleep. Her hand cupped Zoey's cheek and offered words of comfort before turning her attention to Stevie Rae. She commanded over her shoulder, "Take her to the dorm now."

I looked over at Damien who was to her left. I nodded and asked with my eyes to help me get her back to her room where I knew she wanted to be. As if I spoke my request out loud, he shook his head and cradled her with his right arm, supporting half her weight into his body. I tightened my grip on her left side and pulled her closer to my body.

We walked quickly and quietly out of the infirmary and back into the never-ending snowfall. Zoey shivered but didn't say a word. I quickly stopped and shrugged out of my jacket and placed it around her shoulders. It was the least I could do for my Z.

As we steadily walked back to the girl's dorm, we all noticed how every fledgling graciously stepped aside as we walked by, all bowing their heads and crossing their right fists over their hearts. They were allpaying respects to Zoey for her loss. A single tear escaped from her eye as she passed. I tightened my grip on her in hopes that she knew we were here for her. I was here for her.

We entered the quiet common room and quickly headed for the stairs that lead up to her room, when a familiar voice spoke gently, "I'm sorry Stevie Rae died. I didn't want her to." Aphrodite appeared out from a dark corner.

"Don't say shit to us, you fucking hag!" Shaunee snarled, stepping forward to block Zoey. Erin naturally followed suit and stepped forward to create a protective wall in front of Zoey.

"No wait…I need to talk to Aphrodite." Zoey's voice was sturdy but still weak. She looked between Shaunee and Erin's baffled expressions. Damien and I exchanged our own worried glance. Since when did she want to talk to Aphrodite?

She slowly stepped forward. I loosened my grip as she walked past me and between the twins. I didn't care how bizarrely kind Aphrodite was being, I just didn't want Zoey upset any more than what was to be expected, especially over what Aphrodite could be telling her.

They walked away from us and out of hearing distance. My eyes were glued to Aphrodite - looking for any sign of aggression. After all it was her nature to kick someone when they were down. I wouldn't allow that to even happen. Not tonight or any other night ever again.

But nothing happened. Nothing?!

After they talked, Aphrodite turned to walk away from Zoey. Before she left the room she turned and made another hushed comment and turned on her heels and walked away. I rushed to her side while my eyes were still fixated in the direction that Aphrodite exited.

I faintly heard Shaunee and Erin make their normal snide comments. I turned my head back to Zoey's face looking deep into her eyes. Z wasn't upset, she wasn't sad - she was….. dazed?

"Why did you want to talk to her?" I asked as I studied her face for an explanation. I got none. I gently grabbed her arm again and escorted her up the stairs to her room.

"I wanted to know if she had a vision about Stevie Rae's death," she said as we hit the first step.

Her eyes were casted down as we walked up the stairs.

"But Neferet has made it clear that Nyx has turned her back on Aphrodite," Damien's brows creased together as if he was thinking about a difficult math problem.

"I wanted to ask anyway," she said while turning her head slightly towards his and eventually falling back down as we made our way down the long hallway to her room, their room.

I opened the door and instantly froze. I felt, more than heard, Zoey intake a breath before letting all the air out as she gasped.

"No! They've taken her stuff! They can't do that!"

I tightened my grip as she surveyed the empty room. It was as if last year came slamming back to me hitting me square in the chest. When Paul, my roommate, rejected the change and died I came back to an already emptied room. The pure shock of having his personal belongings taken in just an hour after he died was enough to make me lose my mind. To know that he will never come through the door wearing his favorite, smelly jacket - the one that I had begged him to wash multiple times. He never did. To know that we would never have another deep, long, meaningful discussion about what our lives could be like once we change. We were so naïve then! We thought that we were invincible and that we would make it through this change, but I was shortly mistaken when he lay in Neferet's arms one afternoon. It was one of the few I had witnessed personally. To this day it haunts me.

To see everything pouring out of his body was too much to bear. He was my roommate, my brother, and my dearest friend. I don't know where I'd be without Cole and TJ by my side that night. I remember Neferet giving me a vile to drink; which helped with my transition - to help me move on.

Zoey's quiet sobs brought me back to the present. I moved my hands from around her arm to firmly embrace her and hold her to my side. "It's what they always do. Don't worry; they didn't throw away her stuff. They just moved it so that it wouldn't make you sad. If there's something of hers you want, and her family doesn't mind, they'll give it to you."

I remember the next day after Paul died, I had asked Professor Nolan about his things. She placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder and told me the same thing. I nodded and personally requested that smelly jacket, which I did wash. TJ and Cole thought it was weird but I didn't care. I wanted something to remember him by, even thought we were supposed to move on and forget, I couldn't.

She pressed into me briefly before taking a step into the emptied room. It really didn't look the same without the Kenny Chesney poster staring down at us or the Elvis clock radio on the nightstand. I took a deep breath and hugged her to my side tighter knowing that tonight was going to be rough for her. I wanted to tell her that she'd overcome this; she will feel better…eventually. I wanted to tell her that it happened to me and tell her how the first night was the worst but I got through it and it did get better.

Damien suggested she get out of her blood stained clothes and take a shower. My eyes trailed down her body at the once black fabric that danced with every glimmer of light. Now the only color reflecting was the copper shade of dried blood.

Zoey only responded with an "Okay" as she continued to glide lifeless around the room looking at the bare, empty spaces.

The twins both made their pleas for her to eat and in the end she reluctantly gave up and agreed. I knew she wouldn't eat anything but I know their hearts were in the right place.

I looked down at my watch and noticed it was well past curfew. My heart sank into my chest as I realized that I had to leave. I had never broken the rules here at the House of Night and only heard stories of what they consider punishment. I wanted nothing more than to stay with her, to hold her all night and let her cry her eyes out, which as soon as everyone was out of the room she would do. It broke my heart even more knowing that I couldn't be there for her. Damn curfew.

My voice cracked a little with regret. "I'd stay, but its past curfew and I can't be in the girl's dorm." Even though I really want to, I said with my eyes.

"That's okay, I understand."

That single comment broke my heart. She wanted me to stay. Hell, I wanted to stay. Why am I not staying?

"I want to stay, too, but well, I'm not actually a girl," Damien said with a smile. He was trying to make her laugh. She forced out a fake smile and once again said it was 'okay'.

I closed the wide gap between us. I pulled her into a hug. Not the side hugs I have been forced to give her but a full-fledged hug. I hoped she understood that I did want to stay with her. I hugged her tightly, buried my head in her hair. I sighed when it didn't smell the same. Her normal smell of Lavender and Jasmine was mixed with the smell of dried blood and salt from tears. I pulled her closer to me before I grudgingly released her from my arms. I turned and left, knowing if I stayed any longer I wouldn't leave at all.

Damien followed behind me in silence. When we entered the courtyard, I heard him sigh, loudly. I took that as his usual sign that he wanted to say something. I slowed my steps so he could catch up. He gave me a quick glance before looking away from me.

"Erik, I'm…," he whispered as his words drifted off.

He didn't need to finish. I knew what he was going to say. He was sad about Stevie Rae. He was also worried about Zoey. After all he knew them both better than I did.

"I just don't know what we're going to do without her," he finally choked out.

"I know," was all I could say.

He shook his head and looked away from me once again. I stopped in my tracks and turned towards Damien. He was crying silently, tears streaming down his face. I reach out my hand and rested it on his slumped shoulder. I heard a loud sob escape his mouth.

"It's going to be ok, Damien," I said softly.

"How?"

"It gets easier."

"When does it get easier?" he asked while looking directly at me. His sad expression was devastating and gut wrenching. His expression mirrored my own grief when Paul died. The same hopelessness, distress, and need for answers, answers that would never come.

I said the only thing that I could to comfort my friend. His teary eyes met mine as I spoke. "It does get better…over time. At first it is hard to understand but it is the reality of our lives. Some make the change, some don't. There could be thousands of reasons why sherejected the change. But for whatever reason, she did. Things happen for a reason and though they aren't always fair, we can't fight our fate. Nyx is the only person who can determine our future. Stevie Rae…" Damien recoiled from the sound of her name. To be honest, it was making me sad just thinking of her. I took a deep breath and continued, "she was one of the nicest people I know and I will surely miss her."

"Me too," Damien's weak voice declared.

"For Zoey, we need to move forward."

"I am not going to forget her like we are supposed to. I don't want to," he said with a hint of anger.

I held up my hands in front of me in clear hopes he understands that I am on his side, "Damien, I am not telling you that you should forget her. I am saying you should move forward. Keep her memory alive but know that you and the twins need to help Zoey move on. Otherwise, she will not be able to deal with her loss, or yours. Believe me, if I didn't have TJ or Cole, I would have been a complete mess after my roommate Paul died over a year ago. It was hard for me to understand why he died. He was a fifth former, just like me and he died. Even now I don't really understand except that it was his time." I became quiet with the mere memory of Paul. It had been a long time since I spoke about him, to anyone.

"You know Zoey will need you too, right?" Damien said softly.

"I know, but she needs her friends as well. I just want to make this … transition move smoothly for her. It will be very hard and very emotional for her."

"What do you suggest we do?" he asked as we started to head back to the dorm room. His mood was picking up and I could tell he would do anything to make sure Zoey would be happy.

"Well, we could do something after school, like watch some movies. Something simple to take her mind off of it for a while."

"That sounds good. I'll see you in the morning and we can make plans. And thanks for everything Erik. Zoey is really lucky to have you… and weare too." I knew he meant the rest of the gang. I gave him a smile and thanked him. Not a second later, I heard a very frantic Jack coming around the corner. He was wide-eyed and shaking with apprehension.

"Oh my god, I have been worried about Zoey and Stevie Rae. What happened?" Jack asked timidly. His eyes were focused on Damien, but quickly flashed to me and then, back to Damien. I couldn't handle another explanation or recap of the nights' events.

I excused myself, said my goodnights and walked up the stairs to my room. I knew Jack would be in there eventually and for the first time tonight I wished I didn't have a roommate. I need some time, alone.

I opened the door and stepped into the cold, dark room. I closed my eyes wishing I was with Zoey right now. To have her in my arms, to comfort her - knowing what she was about to face tonight. A silent sob escaped my lips as a tear slipped traitorously out of my eye. I didn't even try to wipe it away. I walked slowly into the bathroom to remove my clothes and get ready for a sleepless night.

I turned the bathroom light on and audibly gasped at my appearance. I hadn't realized the blood had spread over my black shirt. I quickly tore it from my body and threw it in the trash. I started the shower in hopes it would relax me enough to lull me into a coma-like state.

I stripped off the rest of my clothing and stepped into the steaming hot shower. I allowed the water to run all over me, enveloping me in a warm embrace. I allowed myself this moment to let all the emotions that had been building in me find their release. I rested against the wall savoring the feel of the hot water and the cold tiles. My tears started falling freely as I ran through this evening's events.

Between my memory of my roommate and the current loss of a dear friend, I hadn't realized I was holding onto so many emotions. I was sad, angry, frustrated, hurt, confused, and most of all I was aggravated. I was sad for the loss of Stevie Rae and the effects it would have on Zoey. I was angry at fate for taking away people that I cared about. I was frustrated by the way our system worked when a fledgling died. I was hurt knowing that I was needed elsewhere and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about that. I was confused as to why she had to die after receiving such a precious gift from Nyx. It just didn't make sense. I was aggravated by rules I had to abide by. Everything in me wanted to run out of this room and into Zoey's. I knew she needed me, but once again I was confronted with the damn rules. I hoped that her friends would comfort her in my absence, again.

With a heavy sigh, I turned off the shower and stepped out. I was completely spent for the night. I dried off quickly and stepped out into the quiet room. Jack hadn't made it back into the room yet. I took this opportunity to get dressed in my favorite shorts and get into bed. I looked at the clock on the nightstand. 6:04 am. I leaned my head onto my pillow willing my eyes to close. Within minutes, I was out.

I started dreaming aimlessly about Zoey and one of our many evenings together, she was happy and laughing. I could see everyone huddled around one of the couches in the girl's common room and there was a heated discussion about who was hotter Daniel Radcliffe or Robert Pattinson. Rob was winning by a long shot. Damn British actor, definitely a vampyre. It made me laugh that he played a role of a vampyre, very interesting.

As the laughter continued, my eyes fell onto each of the people surrounding me. First was Zoey, she was grinning from ear to ear and red as a tomato when she gave her strong opinion about the British hunk. (Her words not mine) Shaunee and Erin both were rooting for Harry Potter but also put their two cents in about their take on Edward Cullen. Damien was by far the giddiest one. He was definitely a fan of Edward and mentioned multiple times how he would like to be bitten by him. I had to just shake my head and laugh. Finally Stevie Rae was to my right, she couldn't and wouldn't give us a straight answer. She gave her take on both actors and decided in the end that she like Rob more. Must be the hair.

It was a happy moment. Everyone was smiling and laughing. It pulled on my heart to know that it will never be that way again. She was gone.

My dream continued and I just enjoyed the moments and memories that invaded my sleep. I welcomed the warm memories and hoped that when I woke, I would find out that last night was just a nightmare.

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So tell me are you a Rob fan or a Daniel fan.. As for me, I am totally a Rob fan.

Review and tell me who you like.