Disclaimer: I own nothing, except my own creations.
Author's Note:
'Calamity Jane' will be my collection of stories in my invented 'Adelaide' universe. Each chapter will standalone (unless otherwise stated), and may not be in a chronological order with regards to the story and ages of the Jane children, as I publish stories as my muse hits me!
If there's any confusion as to where a story sits in the Adelaide timeline, drop me a line and I'll help explain it.
And so, without much further ado, on with the story...
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Patrick Jane loved doing the school run with his children. Teresa couldn't stand the meaningless chit-chat of the mothers at the gate where they await their children, and thus willingly relinquishes the role to her husband.
The other mothers, but of course, find Patrick completely and utterly charming. He is his usual self, and has many a mother making the extra effort on her appearance each morning and afternoon come school drop off and pick up time.
Sometimes Teresa does the school pick up or school drop off, and when she does so, the other mothers loudly lament the loss of Patrick – forgetting that this is Patrick's wife – until noting that Patrick's kids are running toward this woman with yells of 'Mum!'
It doesn't bother Teresa. She trusts Patrick, and bets that he has a great amount of fun at their expense.
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On one such morning for the school drop off, Patrick waved Adelaide and Marta off as per usual. Preparing to depart, Kimberlee del Martin, mother of Logan who was in the same year as Adelaide, sidled up to Patrick and tried to suggest that perhaps they go somewhere for the afternoon. Alone.
Looking momentarily flustered, before recovering, Patrick laughed in good grace, but declined her offer. Taking in the downtrodden look of Ms del Martin, he instead suggested that perhaps they go for a cup of tea and talk about her marriage problems.
'How did you know?'
'A man never discloses his secrets!' said Patrick, knocking the side of his nose. Smiling despite herself, Kim agrees. As Patrick picks up his three year old Sorcha to rest on his hip, they decide to meet at a coffee place just down the road.
Ordering a coffee for himself and a babycino for his youngest daughter, Patrick encourages Kim to speak. Once she opens her mouth, the words just keep coming as she talks about her marriage to Horatio del Martin, the love of her currently depressing life.
Content to sit on her father's lap and watch the adults talk, Sorcha focuses all her attention on getting every last drop of her babycino. Satisfied that she has completed her mission, Sorcha gets comfortable in her father's arms, settling herself in for a nap in a semi-seated position.
Spent with talking, Kim looks at the dark brown curly haired child in Patrick's arm, looking quite the angel when she slept. Sighing in regret, she expresses her wish. 'I'd love another one of those. There is something so precious about babies.'
'You want this one? She's all yours for the taking! Tears, tantrums and all!' jokes Patrick. But then turning serious for a moment, Patrick suggests that she speak with her husband about what she wanted.
Thanking him for his assistance and a sympathetic ear, Kim heads home with a renewed purpose in life, as Patrick takes his sleeping bundle to childcare so that he can head to work.
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After the kids were in bed that night, Patrick suddenly starts a conversation with Teresa as they both clean up the kitchen. 'I got asked for a quick shag today,' he said, sipping his drink nonchalantly, before continuing to dry up as Teresa looked at him.
'What?' she replied, not sure if she'd heard him right.
Patrick responded with a grin. 'You heard me. What would you know, the mums find me attractive!'
Teresa grinned in response, and decided to play along. 'Ah yes. You're so severely lacking at home that you need to search elsewhere to boost your confidence. Heaven help us, you're no good in the bedroom dept. Hope the lady wasn't too disappointed. Poor girl!'
As she turned back to the washing up, she sensed Patrick getting closer, but still wasn't prepared for when he grasped her hips and quickly spun her around as soap suds went flying. Teresa gave a squeal as Patrick growled into her ear. 'You'll pay for that wife!'
'Oh yeah?' Patrick pulls their bodies flush against each other as their arousal heightens. He leans down to kiss his wife, only to be greeted with suds on his face as Teresa splashes her husband with the soapy washing up water.
What ensues is a water fight befitting pre-schoolers and hardly suitable for high ranking CBI officials!
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Later on in bed, after a fast – but fun – bout of lovemaking, Teresa props herself up on Jane's chest as he runs a hand through her hair, the other hand behind his head.
'So whatever did happen to the mother you were talking about?'
Patrick responded with a wry grin. 'Oh I just took her out for coffee and gave her marriage advice. I ought to be paid for this kind of thing. Patrick Jane, Marriage Therapist. I can see it now! And after all, I'm an expert on how to make a marriage perfect!'
Teresa twisted his nipple in retaliation, before he quickly flips her over.
'You just never learn do you?' he said, staring down at her.
'It would seem not,' she said in response, pulling him down for a kiss.
Thankfully there were no nightmares or requests for parents that night!