AN: I love this chapter, especially the end, so I hope it is worth the wait. Just a couple chapters left you guys. Thanks for reviewing and reading!

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Chapter 7: Guilt

The duo left their shelter the next morning after a meager meal. Both their stomachs were clenching in pain but they pushed it aside, moving on despite Mello's injury and Matt's exhaustion.

Food wise they were down to a mere half a sandwich and one chocolate bar. Both boys had not had a full meal for days, and all the walking and swimming was taking a toll. Mello's ankle was still bothering him slightly, but he was walking with a barely noticeable limp without needing Matt or any trees to support his weight. After having a full day of rest Matt's muscles were less sore, but he was still tired. Both were still extremely tired, and only finding camp would relieve them of that burden.

They filled their canteen then moved slowly into the denser part of the woods. There was no natural path here like there was by the river. Dead trees littered the ground. The ground was covered with dead leaves and various green plants, most of which the boys did not know the properties of. Tree branches lied across the ground in their path, and it made walking very difficult.

Matt tripped over a fallen branch, groaning in discomfort. His head was pounding from lack of food and sleep. Occasionally a pang of hunger would hit his stomach, reminding him of how little he had eaten over the past several days. Mello paused, his brave façade having faded almost entirely from existence since they first became lost in the woods. Now he just looked tired, hungry, and utterly lost. Despite this he offered an encouraging smile, silently saying "we can do this, we can make it."

They key was to not think of the journey ahead, but each step in front of them. If they could just keep moving, just a little bit, they would be fine. So the duo continued their hike until the hill came into view.

It was intimidating. It wasn't impossibly steep, but it would not be an easy climb. Trees had somehow managed to grow rooted on the hill, though those were small and far and few between. The dirt was loose and it would be easy to lose their footing. Various plants hid the dirt from view, promising an even more difficult climb. Both boys winced and began to walk along the hill, hoping that some section would stand out as less steep, less riddled with plants, more stable.

Eventually, after about an hour of walking, they did find an easier section of the hill. It hadn't seemed to grow any less steeper, but it had much less plants which would make the climb a lot easier on them.

"You ready?" Matt asked, eyeing Mello's ankle. Mello simply nodded, adjusting his bag on his shoulders and moving towards the hill with Matt. They reached the incline and Matt held back.

"I'll climb up behind you in case your ankle gives out. That way I can help steady you," Matt said. Mello didn't argue, simply moving towards the base of the hill. It would be a tough climb, but they'd never make it back if they didn't climb, and they were pretty much out of provisions. Steeling himself against the pain sure to follow, Mello slowly began to climb up, Matt right behind him.

It wasn't bad at first, but the hill was uneven, sloping in places and almost impossibly steep in others. Mello used a tree branch to drag himself over a particularly steep spot, cringing when he put too much weight on his ankle. It wasn't bad though, and he braced himself with his knees, moving up higher on the hill.

It was a long climb, and both boys kept moving, not pausing to rest. Hesitation was not a good strategy here. Find a suitable handhold, hold on for dear life, and brace with your feet or knees. That's what they continued to do. Each step on his bad ankle made Mello wince, and the pain was slowly growing as they continued to ascend. The plants, when not so numerous, were helpful to grab onto. They were deeply rooted to the hill and easier to hold onto than dirt.

In their path was a barrier of dirt, jutting out of the hill. It probably used to be home of a large plant or small tree before gravity caused it to descend to the ground. Mello used the nearby branches of a plant to drag himself over it, wincing when his ankle knocked against the ground.

Matt was right behind, grabbing a branch to pull himself up. Roots and branches blocked his direct path, so he used another branch to pull himself around it, feet finding purchase on the dirt moments later. He lifted one foot, securing himself up higher. He began to take another step when the dirt, already loose, gave way. He slipped and landed hard on his stomach, sliding down the hill. He groaned when he hit the combination of roots and branches, but clung onto them to try and stop his descent. It worked, although it left him dangling, feet moving furiously to find purchase on the ground below.

"Matt!"

Matt's stomach was aching and so were his arms, probably scratched from his fall. His foot stayed in place a moment before that section of dirt gave away, making him slip farther down. He knew if he let go he'd probably end up at the bottom of the hill again.

Mello was beside him a minute later, trying to figure out what to do to get Matt on more solid ground. "Just hold on," he said, trying to calm himself. Matt was having trouble getting his feet steady. Because of the recent rain, the dirt was still somewhat loose, and not dry. Mello hovered near his friend and removed one hand from the ground to Matt's shoulder to keep him steady. Matt finally got his footing, sighing in relief.

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, come on. We're halfway there," Mello said, trying to smile. Matt simply nodded, waiting for Mello to begin climbing and then following. Their hands were constantly being used for balance and to keep them steady. One false move could send them rolling backwards down the hill, causing another injury.

They tried to keep moving, afraid that staying in a spot too long would make them lose their balance, or that the dirt would give away and they'd go tumbling down. It grew worse near the top of the hill, becoming almost impossibly steep. They hadn't noticed from the bottom because plants had obstructed their view, but the last couple feet of the hill were nearly vertical. The angle was sharp, and Mello slipped when he first began to climb up it, sliding down enough to hit Matt, who barely kept his balance.

"Sorry," Mello said, panting slightly. Both were getting tired from this climb, but Mello slowly navigated up the hill, bracing himself with his feet and his knees and stretching, trying to reach for flat land. He just managed it, and hauled himself up quickly off of the hill.

He breathed a sigh of relief, taking several deep breaths before rolling over to look down at Matt, who was looking at the top of the hill with apprehension.

"Come on Matt, you can do it," the blond encouraged. Matt looked doubtful, and Mello grasped a nearby branch belonging to a fallen tree, reaching over the hill to offer his hand to Matt. "Just reach for my hand, I'll help you up."

"I don't want you to fall," Matt said hesitantly, eying Mello's hand warily. It would be so easy for the branch to break, so easy for his weight to pull the frail blond over with him.

"I won't, just do it," Mello assured.

Mello only hesitated a moment longer before he carefully braced himself and began to rise up. After several torturous seconds, during which Matt was sure he was about to lose his balance while climbing and fall, he could managed to reach Mello's hand. He grasped it firmly, still keeping weight on his feet and balancing with his other hand. Mello's grip tightened around Matt and he pulled slightly. Matt let his feet follow and was near the top when one foot slipped. He yelped slightly, but Mello's hand stopped him from falling. "No!" Matt distantly heard, and with a mighty tug Matt was pulled halfway up on flat ground. He scurried up as fast as he could and collapsed beside Mello.

"Th-thank you."

Mello was pale, eyes wide. He glanced at the descending hill and back at Matt. It would have been a very rough fall. "Of course," he managed finally.

Both stood slowly, moving away from the hill. They kept a safe distance from it then continued on their course, back the way they had come. Camp couldn't be far away, the problem was finding it.

Mello was limping badly now. The climb had been very hard on his ankle, and once again any healing it may have done from resting had come undone. He winced with every step, pausing to steady himself against a tree.

Matt stepped up beside him. "Need help?" he asked. Too tired and pained to be prideful, Mello simply nodded and allowed Matt to help him.

They weren't making very much progress. Mello could not walk very fast on his ankle and though Matt was supporting part of Mello's weight, he was exhausted. The climb had left both boys winded and thirsty, and they began to go through water fast.

Matt paused some time later, groaning in discomfort. His free hand went to his stomach and he winced. It hurt…it hurt a lot. Mello tugged him on. "Come on, you're fine," he said.

"Mello I'm tired, let's just stop a minute."

"We don't have a minute!" he snapped.

Matt sighed, brushing off the irritability because of the lack of food, and pulled Mello to a stop. "Mello I'm serious, I need to stop for a minute."

Mello gave an agitated sigh but stopped, carefully maneuvering himself to the ground. Matt sat beside him, supporting his head with his hands. His headache was growing worse. He tried taking a sip of water to help it, but it did nothing but remind him of how hungry he was. He groaned slightly in discomfort and closed his eyes.

Not the best idea. Closing his eyes simply reminded him of how tired he still was, and how hopeless this all felt. Sure they were at the top of the hill, but they still had no idea where camp was. Not only that but the canteen was feeling light…they were almost out of water. While going without food was a struggle, going without water for even several days was deadly, and they could not miss out on both of those things.

Even now Matt was unbearably hungry, but he was still thirsty. He gave the canteen a small shake. There were only a few sips left in there. Matt glanced at the sky. It would be night in several hours, and at this rate they would not find camp tonight. He wasn't sure how he could go all night and day without water…it simply seemed impossible. Mello took the canteen from him, but at realizing how light it was, paused and glanced at Matt.

"We need more water," Matt said.

"Yeah, but it's at the bottom of the hill," Mello stated unnecessarily.

Matt nodded. "I know. We still have a couple of hours before dark. I could climb down and get some."

Mello shook his head furiously, blond strands flying through the air. "No. You had enough trouble getting up the hill the first time. I climbed much better than you."

"But you're ankle is bothering you badly again. You would never make it back up like that!" Matt argued.

"We can wait," Mello insisted weakly. "We don't need water that badly."

"We can't wait. If we wait it will be until tomorrow and without water by tomorrow I'll have a lot more trouble climbing because on top of being hungry, I'll be thirsty and tired. It just makes sense to go get more now. I'm sorry I didn't grab my bag; it would have saved us all this trouble," Matt muttered.

"It's not your fault Matt." Matt said nothing, gazing at the canteen. "Matt! I said it's not your fault. I only grabbed my bag to get my chocolate. We're lucky I made sandwiches in case the food was awful."

The reminder of food made both of them wince. The last half sandwich was resting within reach.

Matt brought his knees to his chest, resting his head against them. His head was killing him, partially from hunger and partially from how tired he was. He really didn't want to climb back down that hill and up again, but what choice did they have? They were not covering a large distance because Mello simply could not walk much with his injury, and both had drank quite a bit after the tough climb up the hill. They needed the water; they needed something to try and make up for the lack of food in their systems.

"You're right," Mello said finally. "We do need water. I just…" Worry. I'm scared for you when you're alone. The sentiment stood silently in the air. "If you're going to go though, let's finish the sandwich first. You need the energy to climb down and back up."

Mello tried to get Matt to eat all of it, but Matt insisted on splitting it. It did little to quench their hunger; the portion was much too small. After several days the bread had grown dry and tough, and it certainly was not the most appetizing meal. It left both their throats dry, and they finished off the water between themselves.

"I suppose I'll climb down now," Matt said finally.

"Be careful," Mello told him.

"I will. See you soon," he said, slowly lowering himself onto the hill. He wasn't sure how he'd managed to not fall when rushing after Mello days ago, but he got his balance and began to move steadily down the hill, slipping occasionally but managing to keep his balance. Mello couldn't see him once he reached the bottom; there were too many trees and branches, but he tried to calm himself. Matt would be fine. Within an hour he'd hear him climbing back up and he would be fine.

An hour passed, and then two. Night was beginning to fall and Mello was working himself into a near panic. Where was Matt? Why wasn't he back yet? He should have been back a while ago. It shouldn't have taken that long to get water.

His eyes strained to see the bottom of the hill, but he simply couldn't see very well. There were too many trees and plants, and with it getting dark, it was even harder to see. Mello wildly considered climbing down himself, but he knew in the dark it would be nearly impossible and he would just hurt himself further, leaving him and Matt stuck at the bottom once more.

Scenario after awful scenario ran through his head. What if Matt had fallen in the river, and this time he couldn't get to shore? What if he'd run into a bear or a wolf or some other creature that had attacked him? What if he had lost his way and now couldn't find the hill, or where Mello was? He had no supplies except the canteen and…

No…he didn't have the purification tablets! They were still in Mello's bag. Mello's head sunk in despair. He hadn't even given Matt safe water to drink. He could have at least stayed hydrated. Now he was down there dying of thirst just like him.

"He'll be okay. Matt is stronger than he looks. He probably doesn't want to risk the climb at night. First thing tomorrow he'll be back. We'll find camp and he'll be fine. He has to be fine." Mello listened and watched until the woods grew black around him, but he saw no sign of Matt. He curled up into himself, afraid of the darkness around him but unwilling to leave the hill in case there was a sign of Matt.

Not long after, Mello saw the slight glowing light of a possible fire near the bottom of the hill. He couldn't be sure from where he was sitting what it was, but he held onto the thread of hope that it was Matt using it to stay warm. Shivering slightly, Mello wrapped the blanket around himself and curled up on the ground, still near the hill but far enough away to not roll off. He was tired, but he couldn't sleep, hunger and worry overriding his body's desire for rest. He hated being out here in the open alone…he was scared, and felt weak and unprotected. His stomach was aching with hunger and his head felt pained and heavy. Images of Matt trying to survive on his own injured…dead…flashed through his mind. His throat tightened at the thought and he pushed it back.

Matt was fine. Matt was fine.

He repeated it to himself over and over, restlessly trying to find sleep on the cold, hard ground. His ankle was still throbbing from the abuse it took on the hill. He felt tired and lightheaded from lack of food. Every time he managed to relax his stomach would be hit with a sudden sharp pain, angry at being neglected.

And Matt's face burned behind his closed eyelids, chasing sleep from his grasp.

He slept restlessly for a while, starting awake every few minutes at some unknown sound or some frightening image of Matt hurt. He curled up tighter, closing his eyes and trying to ignore everything that hurt. His stomach, his ankle, his muscles…

Matt was fine.

His head pounding, his body shaking, his heart aching.

"Matt is fine. He's okay. He's fine."

It hurt so much.

"He's fine."

Why had he gotten so mad? Why had he rushed ahead of Matt and fallen, leading to this entire mess?

"He has to be fine, he has to be."

Why hadn't he packed more supplies, more to eat, more to protect them? Why had he let Matt go off on his own? How could he protect Matt when Matt wasn't here?

"He's fine…I'll never forgive myself if he's not. But he is fine. He is."

Why was he always so mean? Why did he take things out on his best friend? Why was he weak…too weak to stay with him, to protect him, to keep him safe? Now he was out there alone and without supplies, all because of his injury; all because he had rushed in his anger and fallen days ago.

"My fault…all my fault…getting lost, hungry, so very hungry. It hurts, oh God my stomach, it hurts. It all hurts. So thirsty…water…Matt…alone…Matt…I'm sorry."