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Chapter 3: Crazy Angel of Konoha and The Chuunin Exams
This story is dedicated to the my-face-to-your-fist martial arts style. I bled first! I win!
"Speech"
'Thoughts'
Sound Effects
/Comments/ or AN: comments
AN: I was originally going to have this huge, sappy, waffy explanation of what Kasumi had been doing so far in Konoha but then decided it was too bad. Have a nice day!
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Kasumi Tendo walked calmly down the streets of Konoha, carrying a small basket of groceries and humming softly as she strolled along.
Nothing out of the ordinary, actually, except for the two shining wings behind her back, curling gracefully behind her head.
Kabuto, rookie failure and multiple dropout, was in love. "Hey, who's that angel over there?" He asked a passing Jounin, "She even has wings?"
"Take a second look, with an illusion dispelling jutsu." The Jounin said, and quickly walked off, cringing and attempting to avoid the eyes of the girl.
Kabuto did so, putting his hands quickly into the seals so as not to be noticed, and then stared open-mouthed at the strange sight now before him.
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"So... Tendo Ranko, Tendo Gaara, and Tendo Haku, here to sign up for the Chuunin exams... from the village of Sound?" The man at the desk looked at them, questioningly. "Any relation to the Crazy Angel?"
Ranma had struck a deal with a slightly corrupt Sound jounin – in exchange for a little cash, they would be able to participate in the Chuunin exams in Konoha, the one hidden village they had not yet visited in their quest for a home. "Who?" he asked cautiously.
"Tendo Kasumi, the Crazy Angel of Konoha." The ticket man said, wondering who had possibly not heard of her. "She's one of the Chuunin in this village."
"Uh... I do have a cousin by that name." Ranma said, trying to hide the fact that he was lying through his teeth. "Where does she live? We'll visit her before the exams begin tomorrow."
"Here." He quickly scribbled down an address and handed it to Ranma.
"Huh. Why don't we check it out, guys?" Ranma remarked to his partners.
"Who is this 'Kasumi'?" Gaara asked suspiciously.
"Someone I used to know, a long time ago." Ranma answered mystically.
"Whatever. Lets find out." Gaara concentrated a little harder, and the sand transforming their Ninja Headbands to bear the symbol of Sound solidified, making it a little easier for him to stop concentrating; it would stay on it's own for a few hours.
Making their way through the crowds, the trio tried not to attract attention, despite the strange clothing, giant container full of sand, and animal mask.
As they neared their destination, a small orange shape knocked into Ranma, prompting Haku and Gaara to ready themselves as Ranma stumbled back a step and the orange shape was knocked to the floor.
"Oof! Sorry about that. I should have looked where I was going! Heh hehe!" Naruto Uzumaki, Konoha genin and orange speeding blob, attempted to apologize. "Hey! Ninja from another village!"
Ranma, Gaara, and Haku all nervously nodded at that.
"Are you here for the Chuunin exams?" Naruto asked enthusiastically.
"Yes, but for now we are looking for someone. Do you know Tendo Kasumi?" Ranma asked.
"Kasu...mi... Oh! You mean the Crazy Angel! She's pretty nice, but also creepy." Naruto said, shivering, but then perked up again. "I'm going to be in the Chuunin exams as well! Good luck!" Naruto then went speeding off again, completely ignoring the three.
"Creepy? That's not like Kasumi." Ranma said, and continued through to the address on the card.
Knocking on the door, Gaara tapped his foot impatiently. Haku asked Ranma softly, "Are you sure she'll still remember you? It has to have been at least six years... since you haven't seen her since you knew me..."
"Eight years," Gaara corrected, "Since he didn't see her after he met me either."
"Ehe..." Ranma began, "I knew her before I became a ninja."
"Before you were six years old? How do you remember?" Haku asked, turning his head slightly to the side.
As soon as Ranma opened his /well, at the moment, her/ mouth to answer, the door opened, revealing a shining light and an angelic, winged figure.
"Kasumi!" He /she/ shouted, "Long time no... see... When did you get wings?" Ranma asked, only able to keep his mind because of the strange things he had already seen.
Kasumi looked confused for a moment, before turning around and grabbing one of them with her hands. "Oh, these. No, these are just an illusion jutsu! Try using a dispel."
Ranma did so, and then turned back to his friends. "Definitely not like the Kasumi I knew..."
Making a few more seals, she was returned to the pretty winged form. "It's been so long, Ranma. When did you become 14 years old?"
"His birthday way a couple months ago." Gaara answered quickly.
"No, I meant why isn't he... let's see... he should be around 20 years old, now." Kasumi answered after a lot of thinking.
"20?" Haku asked.
"Um. Cologne cast an age-reversal spell on me before she banished me here. I was six years old when I came here. How long ago did you get here?" Ranma answered, being mindful of the disbelieving stare from Haku and casual acceptance of the strange new information from Gaara.
Turning around, he explained. "I didn't think it was important enough to mention. I'm this age now, anyway, and I don't mind the extra years of life... so..." Ranma trailed off.
Gaara nodded. "I expected as much. It's one of the only ways a moron like you could learn so much before the age of six." Gaara added the last phrase with a smirk.
"I understand," Haku said simply, "You were finally given an age to match your mental maturity. Pity you then went and grew faster than your mind."
"Hey!" Ranma said, "That old hermit we met said I was a taijutsu genius!"
"Just kidding, Ranma! You shouldn't take it so seriously." Gaara said, beginning to laugh.
Turning back around semi-angrily, Ranma brightened as soon as he saw Kasumi again. "So, how long have you been here?"
"Just one year, actually. Cologne must have sent me here a while after you. Have you really been here eight years so far?" Kasumi asked.
"Yes. We're here to take the Chuunin exams."
"Oh, those? They're easy, if you have the stomach for it. Come in, and you can introduce me to your friends..."
'The stomach for it?' Ranma asked, wondering at the changes in his old friend. Gaara and Haku followed him into the small apartment.
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"Hey, look! It's that kid from before." Gaara remarked as they waited for the exams to begin.
"You're right." Haku said, laughing, "He's making some sort of speech about never giving up. It's so cute."
"I think, as your older sister, I am forbidding you to finish that line of thought." Ranma said, trying to remain in character with his gender nouns.
"Listen up!" A shout came from the front of the room. "This is the start of the first of three Chuunin Exams! The written test!"
Suddenly, the room became quiet.
"I am the examiner for this first section, Morino Ibiki! There are a few rules. Listen well, because I will not repeat myself. You will all be assigned seats at random. Then, you will be given test sheets. The final grade will be team-based: If any one of you fails, all three fail. In addition, anyone caught cheating more than five times will be instantly failed. There will be ten questions. The tenth is withheld until the last ten minutes of the exam." He finished his speech, and began helping the assistants hand out sheets. Sitting at the large desk at the front, facing the room, he continued. "These assistants will be constantly checking for any and all signs of cheating. Good luck."
Ranma was placed far enough away from Haku and Gaara that she could not see them at all. "This may be difficult. We will just have to not get caught cheating." she remarked into a mirror while pretending to check her hair.
"I will relay the information. I assume you will be using your most stealthy jutsu?" Haku responded, making sure the mask prevented anyone from seeing where his eyes were looking.
"I will use my sand eye jutsu, just in case." Gaara chimed in, just as the exam was starting.
'Combination jutsu: Clone Jutsu and Umi-sen-ken!' Ranma cast her jutsu silently with the help of the umi-sen-ken, and snuck off, leaving a pencil-pushing doppelganger in her place.
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"Pencils down!" The examiner shouted. "I will now give the tenth question... but first, another rule."
"Huh? What?" The ninja classroom was confused.
"Before I give you the tenth question, you must all make a decision. If you get the tenth question wrong, you may never take the Chuunin exam again!"
Ranma zoned out as the orange kid made another stupid speech.
"You may choose not to take the tenth question. If you do so, your entire team also fails! You have a choice: Do you risk losing everything, or do you let your team down?" The examiner's face betrayed no emotion.
The class was hushed. Nervous energy flowed around the room, but came to rest mostly on a single Genin.
"I... I will not take the tenth question." A skinny, black haired Sand ninja was the first to give in.
"Ikari Shinji. Fail. Kankurou and Temari, his teammates, also fail." The examiner did not change facial expression at all in this time.
"Shinji, you shit! I'm going to kill you!" Kankurou exclaimed as he stalked out.
After that interesting failure, Ranma didn't pay much attention. A couple people had been failed for cheating too much, and a couple more quit. He didn't really care. He was waiting for the question.
"All right. This is the last chance. Will any of you give up?" The examiner took one last look around the room. "Very well. You all pass." The examiner continued his blank yet hostile stare until the kid who identified himself as Naruto spoke up again.
"What? That's it?" He exclaimed, almost madly.
"Yes. You pass. On to the next exam." Suddenly, a huge banner flew into the room, bearing the words "Exam 2" on the front. Anko, the second examiner, announced herself and brought the genin to their second destination.
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Ibiki picked up the paper exams, enjoying reading some of the horrible answers. More of the students appeared to have discovered the planted geniuses, this time – almost all of the papers bore a resemblance to the correct answer. Then his eyes went wide.
"Uzumaki Naruto, eh? This is the first time someone passed the test without a single answer!" He laughed and continued to the next paper down the column. "Gah?"
He rubbed his eyes and checked again. "How did she get this? She wasn't caught cheating at all, not even once! Well... actually, I guess this counts as one. Why did she expect to be able to turn this in as if it was her test?" He laughed softly and erased the name "Tendo Ranko" from the top of the answer key and returned it to his suspiciously unlocked desk.
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Ranma stared intently at his fingernails as the orange kid caused yet another commotion. He sighed and began to toss a kunai in the air and catch it.
An arm of sand intercepted his projectile. "Did you even listen to the rules at all?" Gaara asked, almost frustrated with the number of times he, the youngest, had had to be the most mature and make Ranma do what was appropriate.
"Umm. We have to get 2 scrolls and then reach some tower." Ranma answered, slowly as he thought about what had been said.
"We have only ten days, and the tower is in the center of the area. Otherwise, you got it right. Oh, and we need two different scrolls – heaven and earth." Gaara was surprised that Ranma had payed any attention at all.
"Heh. I bet we finish in less than two days." Haku said, listening in to the conversation while checking his Kunai.
Ranma then heard running footsteps behind him, and the three turned.
"Kasumi? What is it?" Ranma asked, opening his eyes wider than the sleepy half he had previously accomplished.
Panting, she stood up and reached for one of her wings, pulling a large scroll out from the side of the left wing. "This is the result of hard work and preparation! Ranma, I knew I would find you again, so I had this made." Kasumi beamed proudly and presented him with the gift.
"What does it do, Kasumi?" Ranma accepted it and then looked again into Kasumi's cheerful eyes.
"It can summon, Ranma, any water. The user of this scroll will be able to have any water he or she wants! It only works once, but there is more than one water that can have a lasting effect..." Kasumi adopted a lecturing pose for her long dialog, pointer finger pointed upwards.
"Any... water..." Ranma said, realizing the significance of the scroll's power. "Thank you, Kasumi! I will be sure to use it when I have a chance!"
"Ohhhh Kaaay!" Anko, the second examiner, shouted, "Genin, to your assigned gates!"
Ranma, Gaara, and Haku turned back to see Kasumi already gone.
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"So, we have the heaven scroll... that means we need an earth scroll..." Ranma thought out loud.
"Coincidence, us getting gate one." Haku said, confidently, "Because we are going to finish first."
The examiner's assistant that had led them to the gate and given them their scroll spoke up. "I wouldn't be so cocky. Many top rookie ninja have met their match in this second exam. The forest of death is not to be taken lightly."
"We are beyond the top rookies." Gaara said, leaving his eyes closed, "We are estimated to be Jounin level."
"It is not wise to rank yourself." The examiner said sagely.
"This 'estimate' was made by the Jounin we have defeated." Haku said, in an equally sage tone.
"Uh? Ah, the others are in place." The assistant moved to the gate and unlocked it. "Go!"
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"Hmm." Ranma thought to himself about the exam as he jumped through the trees, alone. 'We haven't even encountered anyone in the few hours we have been here. Is it possible to lose because we did not reach an enemy in time to take their scroll?'
His thoughts were cut short. "Ahem. I have been waiting for you." A long-haired ninja of Konoha stood on a branch a scant 10 meters away. "Saotome Ranma, eh? I know all about you."
Ranma almost didn't notice. "You... you know my name? My real name?" For an instant, Ranma was scared, until his eyes rested a meter above the ninja, in the obscuring leaves of the upper branches.
"Saotome Ranma. Unranked rogue ninja, reportedly from the sand... though there is no record of you before being declared a criminal. I wonder..."
Ranma tensed. "You know so much about me. Tell me who you are!" Ranma demanded.
"Kabuto. I am Kabuto, multiple failure and information collector." Kabuto grinned. "You also have an unknown connection to Kasumi-sama."
Ranma smiled. "Did you bring your scroll to confront me like this?" He asked suddenly, changing the topic.
"No, why?" Kabuto was surprised.
"Because," Ranma said, flashing from his branch to Kabuto's in an instant, "If you have it, we might have already won right here."
Kabuto knew no more.
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Gaara did not jump in the trees. He preferred to enjoy a nice walk, as if on a sandy beach or perhaps a pleasant oasis in the desert.
He narrowed his eyes as he reached the end of the sanded path.
"Earth Element: The Desert Spreads!" He shouted, making the hand seal quickly.
He smiled and continued to slowly walk through the sand, making his presence obvious and leaving a trail of earth converted to sand behind him.
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Haku jumped along, leisurely, taking his time but ensuring that not a step was heard. The commotion of battle soon reached his serene ear.
He stopped when he saw the orange kid and his team fighting a host of replicas on the ground while the badly hidden users of the technique remained in the tree above.
"I wonder if I will find a scroll here?" Haku said to himself, the only sound he had made, and moved closer.
Haku frowned when he heard the mean laughter of the attackers. Slipping in ever closer, he stopped when he was withing arms length of the intensely concentrating and oblivious mist ninja.
"I feel a presence," one said, turning around. "Hmm. It's nothing." Reaching into his pack for another kunai or shuriken, he frowned. "That's strange. I thought I had more than this."
The other two turned their heads slowly. "Open the pack..."
"What? Our scroll... is gone!" Turning angrily back to the fight, the victim opened his eyes wide. "Our replicas are gone!" Standing next to the team of three that had been such easy prey, Haku was finishing off the last replica. "Dispel!"
"You! You stole our scroll!" The leader of the three exclaimed.
Haku turned slyly. "You mean these?" Holding up a handful of shuriken, raised to throw, Haku used biting sarcasm. "Or these?" he said, guiltily holding up a handful of kunai.
"He's... going to attack! Duck!" The three hid behind the forward branch, but Haku disappeared as he lunged forward into his throw.
"A mirror?" Naruto questioned to no one in particular, "Where'd that guy go?"
Haku slid silently out of the mirror he had hid behind the three. Throwing the projectiles precisely, he pinned the enemy completely.
"Or... you meant this?" He said softly, enjoying the look of fear on his opponents' faces when they realized they were trapped, holding up the captured earth scroll. "I think I'll leave you to face the consequences."
Haku gracefully slid back into the mirror, emerging before Naruto and his team.
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"He wasn't lying..." Ranma said angrily as he finished removing all the contents of Kabuto's pack. "And he was alone, too. Damn, I'm never going to get two scrolls on time."
Leaving Kabuto bound to a tree, he continued on, searching for other genin teams.
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"What did you say?" Gaara said, slowly, looking at the team of three behind him.
"Were you abandoned by your team? You must be so weak that they think you're better off dying." The one with the umbrella laughed again, harshly.
"I think you have your signals wrong. I'm angry enough to kill you, now." Gaara said, remaining calm.
"Hah! All three of us? It will take only me to take you down!" The apparent leader of the team threw his umbrella into the air, where it rotated quickly.
"Throwing away an advantage is a bad idea." Gaara said, tossing a wave of sand in the way of the rain of needles that assaulted him. "You encountered me alone and had an advantage of numbers. Attacking one at a time defeats the purpose."
Catching the umbrella, the man retorted, "I'll defeat you even if you can block the first attack! This next one won't miss!"
"You aren't listening, so I guess I won't say any more." Gaara raised his hand, and the sand he had prepared around the area came up and captured the man, leaving only his head out of the sand. "Desert Coffin!"
"Wha... What is this?" The man said, trying to struggle his way out but failing.
"You are defeated. I need not answer." Gaara gestured, and the heaven scroll the man was carrying shot out of the sand for him to catch.
"Thanks for the scroll. I'll be going now." With that, he turned and slowly walked off in another direction.
The other two were stunned just enough not to realize that Gaara had bound their feet as well.
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"He's powerful." Kiba said, watching from the bushes. Gaara had exited the scene to the left, and the three watched as the two with merely sand-covered feet tried to escape to help their comrade. Akamaru had retreated to his owner's jacket in fear of the young man with black eyes.
Hinata looked in the direction Gaara had left in, and activate her Byakugan. "Look out!"
Her cry came only an instant before Gaara's voice. "Earth Element: The Desert Spreads!" The sand extended along the path just behind the bush, and Gaara walked slowly along it, not looking any direction but forward.
Kiba breathed a sigh of relief. Hinata explained, "I thought he was surely making seals to attack us."
After he was a few meters past Kiba, Hinata, and Shino, Gaara stopped. "Be happy you didn't decide to attack me either," he said, turning his head to face the foliage they hid behind, "Because I show no mercy."
Hinata first, then Kiba and Shino as well, decided that discretion was the better part of valor and took the chance to run away.
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AN: Did I do this too fast? Maybe in a rewrite I'll add more detail.