Results
Block-Breakin' Interlude
AN: So they're back, the dreaded interludes, with a whole new level of suck. I need this bad jokes and swear words to concentrate on the serious stuff. For bonus points, guess the characters and setting from the title.
Night of the Return of the Attack of the Mighty Morphin Mad Senile Amazon
Part Zero + One Half
Cologne's eyes, closed for all her near memory, sprang open once again, to face the light of the distant sun. She felt the dust of the Moon beneath her feet and the still vacuum of space around her, though she still survived.
"After a thousand years," she softly spoke, aloud despite the lack of air, "After a thousand years, I have awakened! I will have my revenge on the people of earth!" Cologne declared.
The Moon lander robot beside her sighed, if it was at all possible for a robot to sigh. "She's only been here ten minutes..." it thought, solemnly.
(scene change)
"I am a robot that was once, months ago, built to explore the Moon more thoroughly. But the magic of Cologne gave me intelligence and purpose. From the time I first thought, I knew she was evil, as well as insane. I have gathered you here because you are the only chance to defeat her." the Moon Lander, now nicknamed Zargon, finished explaining.
Shampoo looked at Ukyo, then at Pantyhose Taro. "We've tried to fight her before. She destroyed Nerima on the day she came back from the moon. We're powerless before her might." Shampoo had finished learning Japanese in the two years Cologne had spent dancing on the Moon before coming to Earth again.
"I have something for that also. I have almost one half of her foul magic in my hands, but it is the weaker half – enchantments and minor tricks like teleportation. I can grant you the power to defeat her, once combined with your own formidible strengths." Zargon looked away, his holographic face blinking though it never needed to. "Take these power bracelets. Tap the button and say 'Power Up!' and you will be granted the power you need."
Ukyo was first to react. "Power Up!" Her body seemed to shimmer, before she was suddenly covered in a red body armor, her traditional spatula strapped to her back, and a small pistol at her hip.
Ryuu Kumon, standing in the back, mumbled under his breath, and gained an armor of the sheerest black, along with an assault rifle. "Sweet." he said.
Gosunkugi, well aware he was chosen because he was hiding behind Taro when they were summoned, stuttered out the command phrase, and was made into a warrior of shining blue, a small gun with a voodoo doll imprint on the side appearing in his hand.
Shampoo cried out "Power Up!" with confidence, and her pink armor seemed to compliment her hair perfectly before it was sealed under her helmet. Her bonbori maces at her back and a pistol similar to Ukyo's at her side, she appeared most dangerous of the group despite her coloring.
Panyhose Taro screamed out at the top of his lungs, and a yellow suit covered him, leaving him with just the armor and no weapons.
Taro was pissed. "What is this shit? You all got cool shit and sweet colors, and here I'm in a fuckin YELLOW costume with NOTHING?"
Zargon responded. "No one actually likes you."
The Red Ranger looked at the Pink Ranger, her expression masked by... her mask... and then turned and walked towards Shampoo, taking her hand. She took off her helmet, but the rest of the suit stayed. "We've got the ability to finally beat her. We can find our friends again."
Shampoo also took her helmet off, dropping it by her side. "We can tell Ranma when we find him..." Shampoo almost trailed off, leaving unspoken that they didn't even know if Ranma or anyone Cologne had misplaced was still alive. "We can tell him that we don't love him like that anymore." With that said, she wrapped her arms around Ukyo's neck and planted a kiss on her lips.
Ryuu looked disappointed. "Fuck! Now who will I get as a love interest in this shitty story."
Gosunkugi looked hopeful, until Ryuu caught him staring and hit him so hard his parents felt it.
AN: That's all for now. Hopefully it is amusing.