Chapter 9

When Tony woke up the next morning he found himself alone. It wasn't unusual, Gibbs often got up earlier than him, but what wasn't usual though was that he couldn't smell any coffee. Tony frowned and got out of bed. Gibbs always put on the percolator the first thing in the morning, so why hadn't he done that today.

Tony took a quick shower before putting on some clothes and heading down stairs. He found Gibbs sitting by the kitchen table, reading through Sarah's file. Tony had been around Gibbs so much that he could immediately tell that his lover hadn't had any coffee yet, so before doing anything else, he walked over to the counter and put some on, then he went to the table and sat down beside Gibbs.

"She's been through so much, Tony", Gibbs said without looking up. "Too much for a child of her age."

"I know", Tony replied. "But she got out of there, and that's all that counts. How long have you been up, Jet?"

"A couple of hours. Couldn't sleep."

"You had to know." It was more of a statement than a question and Gibbs nodded affirmatively. Tony picked up a photo of Sarah and looked at it for a long time. It looked like it was taken just shortly after she had been brought to the orphanage. She was thinner than she was now and it looked like she had thrown up thick walls around herself, giving the photographer a wary look.

"What did they do to her, Jet?" he asked softly.

"A lot of things. I think Mark summoned it up pretty well, even though he left out some parts. Her father even used to burn her with a match or a lighter."

"Why use a cigarette when you can use fire directly, huh?" Tony said dryly and clenched his jaws.

"It also says here that they probably used mental abuse more than physical. Most of the injuries she had when she was found were at least a week old."

"But who brought her out of there? And when did her parents die."

"Well, Mr. and Mrs. O'Hara had gone for a short trip somewhere, no one knows for sure but the police guess that they wanted to get away for a little while."

"And it was on that trip they had the car accident?"

"Exactly. They had locked Sarah inside her room until they came back and told a curious neighbor that she was staying with a relative. Two days later, Sarah had started to throw things around and made a lot of noise, enough to disturb the neighbors who thought it was a burglar and called the police."

Tony took the file from Gibbs and read it through himself. When he was done his jaws were tightly clenched and his eyes were hard as steel, his hands trembling with rage.

"I know, Tony", Gibbs said before the younger man had a chance to say anything and took the file from him. "But she's okay now. No one will ever hurt her again, and soon we'll have her here, where she'll be really safe and loved."

"Yeah, but who knows how long that will take? I hate bureaucrats."

"Tell me someone who doesn't."

Gibbs stood up from the table and put the folder away before starting to prepare breakfast for them. In an attempt to clear the heads of their girl's horrible past, they started to discuss the re-making of the guest room to a bedroom more suitable for a child, and made a list of things they would have to buy, and another list of furniture Gibbs would make himself, such as a book case, a chest of drawers and some shelves. They thought it was best to start right away, so that the room would be completely finished by the time Sarah could come home. Both knew though that it was possible that she wouldn't be allowed to come home with them, but none of them wanted to think about it and forced those thoughts away. They weren't helping anyway.

Since Tony was completely new to the idea of being a parent, he let Gibbs take most of the lead and was content with just listening and learning. Soon he understood that Gibbs really had missed being a father, and he often saw a flash of pain and yearning in the older man's ice-blue eyes. He knew then that Gibbs thought of his daughter, Kelly, and made sure that his lover knew that he was there for him, and always would be.

XxX

After a lot of though, Gibbs decided to go up to the attic and dig out some of Kelly's old things. He knew that his first daughter wouldn't mind that her things came of use again, and he was even positive that she would be happy if Sarah had her toys to play with. He brought Tony up to the attic and with some hesitance, he dug out some boxes that held Kelly's old toys. He opened one of the boxes slowly and looked down on the things it contained, things he had not wanted to look at since the day he had packed them down so many years ago. Memories flashed before his eyes as he picked up a stuffed animal and a shivering breath managed to escape his clenched jaws. Then he suddenly felt Tony's hand on his shoulder and looked up to meet the younger man's eyes, which were filled with deepest concern.

"I'm okay, Tony", he said huskily and forced himself to smile, but he could see that Tony didn't believe him.

"No, you're not", he said softly. "I can see it in your eyes."

Gibbs looked gravely at his lover for a moment and then he turned back to the toy in his hands.

"I miss them so much", he mumbled and the next moment he found himself wrapped in Tony's strong, warm arms.

"I know, Jet", he whispered. "I know. You don't have to do this."

"I know. But I want to. I have a feeling that this is what Kelly would have wanted as well."

Tony pressed his lips to the silver-haired man's temple and then they set to the task to look through the toys. When they were finished, they had settled on some old stuffed animals that weren't too worn out and some games and jigsaw puzzles. Gibbs also found some of Kelly's old books and decided that he would bring them down too. He remembered how he used to read to his daughter at bedtime and looked forward to be able to do it again.

TBC