A/N: I'm Canadian, so when I say degrees, I mean CELCIUS. 7 degrees is a few degrees above the temperature where you should expect snow. I'd say that would be frost, not snow. Just for those who don't use the metric system. Anyways, here's a new chapter. Please enjoy.
Hyuuga Hinata – The boy with the eyes of steel.
I don't think I am one to judge what is fair and what is not fair. A lot of things about my life could be considered 'unfair' – my body constantly failed me, my will was weak, I was soft-spoken and barely could grasp even the simplest of techniques; worst of all, I was the heiress to one of the most prestigious clans in Konoha. A lot wasn't fair, but if I dwelled on that, I knew I'd give up.
No, I wasn't one to judge fairness, but, I knew that this was certainly not justified by any means.
I was being followed.
Every step, every breath, every blink, I was always watched. And I couldn't figure out why he was doing it, or even so much as to how he could possibly think I didn't realize this. When I trained, when I cooked, while I shopped, he was always there. There was no privacy in the compound, I felt like a celebrity being followed by cameras…but the only cameras were his eyes. I had to watch where I looked, because many times I would glance up just to meet his hard gaze. Why? Why was he always there?
And his eyes were like ice, so hard, so cold. He only showed fury, and I couldn't figure out why he hated me so much. He was following me obsessively, and once again, I began to fail utterly and completely. His eyes were always on my back, like he saw through me, and I never felt alone. I was always afraid, afraid of the ice in his eyes.
People always saw the worst in me. He saw that and more, and I became terribly self conscious. I was afraid to dress and bathe, because my body wasn't perfect, my skin was so white, and I felt that it made me look like a ghost. My face was very round, and I wasn't beautiful, I was very ordinary, very plain. And he kept staring at me; I felt the ice on my skin. I would slip into the tub quickly after undressing, and bring my clothes into the bathroom with me, afraid he would see the body I was so ashamed of. I was not strong, I was not in the physical shape I should be, and it felt wrong having his beautiful, cold, dark eyes constantly on my plain self. I was only ten years old when this began, and my body had began it's journey from girl to woman, so I felt even more awkward and afraid. I wished I could be invisible. I wish he couldn't see me.
I was thankful for my escape, though. Being the Hyuuga that I was, I knew that crying was not an option, crumbling and falling to the ground could never happen. I wouldn't allow it, but I wasn't sure how long I could follow my father's wishes. To the best of my ability, I tried, and I yearned for the strength that I needed to please everyone. But, no matter how hard I pushed myself, it was to no avail. The stress was unbelievable, I began shaking and flinching, fearing touch and connections. I wished I could find something right about myself. I wished it was easier. When I was ten, I was very self conscious, until I found my escape.
Three miles east of the compound, through an abandoned escape route, across a river, through a waterfall's cave, there was a clearing. It was small, but big enough, and it was easy enough to get there, once I memorized the way. I had only two hours at the most, but I made do, planting and tending in the dark. The forest was a frightening place while alone, and especially on winter nights, when Konoha's weather usually dropped to about seven degrees, it was frightening. I feared taking more than the clothes on my back, because I figured the only way I could sneak out without getting caught was as fast as possible, and stopping for gardening tools and shoes wasn't much of an option. I left all my supplies in a plastic container, buried close to the garden. Winter nights were hard, because I had to claw through the frosted dirt to get to my supplies. Fall nights were also difficult, because I had to harvest many of my vegetables, and my pumpkins, which were in a separate patch east to my little flower and veggie garden, were very heavy to carry the whole three mile hike back to the village.
But I managed.
I had made a secret deal with a fruit stall manager, who came to Konoha every second day to sell his produce. He was very kind, and I was familiar with him because of the many times I shopped at his stall. He had a round, chubby face, and a genuine smile. His hair was balding, but his cheeks were rosy and his voice was booming. In a way, I looked up to him, and I became comfortable enough around him to speak without stammering. It was him who provided me with the seeds to my garden, and it was his idea for me to make a profit off of his sales. But I didn't want the money. I brought my fruit and vegetables to his stall late at night, and he would sell it and keep the money for his family. It was my thanks to him; I'm sure he would never realize just how much he did for me.
Two years of hard work had passed. I tended to my garden each night, and did my Hyuuga duties during the day. When it came to harvest, I'd carry as much as I could, usually making five or six trips when it was just vegetables, and sometimes as many as twenty trips when it was pumpkin season. All within two hours, I would go as fast as I could through the underbrush, and I began to make a path. I feared someone might follow it, but through my detection, no one did. I refused to activate my Byakugan, because this was my escape from the Hyuuga. I would not do it. At night, I was a gardener, a simple peasant; I was a nobody, just like I wished to be. My flowers were my friends, and I never, ever cried. How thankful, I was. How I loved my flowers, and most of all, how I loved not having his icy cold eyes burrowing through my back. It was not only my escape from the duties of the clan, it was my escape from him.
And then something that I had not been expecting happened. I had to stare into the eyes I had spent two years avoiding, I had to throw hits at the perfect, beautiful, porcelain face I wished was non-existent. Against my nature, I had to fight him. I had to hurt him, and I knew he wanted to hurt me. All of his hatred was pushed through his hands, and into my skin. He hated me, and he was thrilled at every touch.
For the first time, I cried. It was a very unexpected battle. I remember seeing our names flash up on the screen, during the preliminary round of the chunin exam. My heart was beating, and I tasted the blood in my mouth from biting my lip so hard. I couldn't back down, though. My team mate even begged me to stop. But I couldn't turn away from those cold eyes. I thought, that maybe, if I allowed him to hurt me, he wouldn't hate me so much. He would let out some of his frustration towards me, and it wouldn't feel his cold eyes anymore. I truly wished not to feel his eyes on me anymore.
So, blow after blow, mentally and physically he tortured me. It was so unexpected, how fast my tears fell down my face. It was something so alien to me. I had never cried before, until I heard the words of hatred coming out of his perfect mouth. But there was a certain pain in his cold eyes, and I didn't think it was jealously. It was something completely different, and I could tell it was tearing him up inside.
I was in the hospital, unconscious while disaster struck Konoha. I was able to watch Neji fight Naruto in the last round of the exam, but obviously my hospital stay was not long enough, and I fell ill again, but not before observing something very important. I was grateful, happy even, that Neji had beat me. And I was nervous and scared, but excited that he would fight Naruto. Naruto was very good at teaching people to be right, and kind; he was close in my heart. I hoped he could do the same for Neji – I very much hoped my torture was not in vain. I hoped his icy eyes wouldn't be on my back anymore. I watched Naruto talk sense into Neji, I heard Naruto say things about the Hyuuga clan that both Neji and I thought, but feared to speak aloud. And then my heart throbbed, because I felt like crying again, not sure how I felt about the two young men battling in front of me. I coughed up my feelings, the blood in my chest, and passed into two week unconsciousness, only waking up to find that Neji was gone on a mission to receive a close friend of Naruto's.
Despite all that happened, I feared for my garden. It had to have been weeks since someone had tended to it, and I was afraid that it would be too far gone to save, now. It was also time for my fruit to blossom, and I didn't want to let down the stall manager's family by not giving him my fruit. The moment I was well enough to visit my small, little garden, I did. And what a surprise it was when I found my garden perfectly in tact, the soil freshly dug, and the fruit already picked.
Someone had followed me here.
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Yes! Done. A lot was covered in this chapter, I have to reallllyyy write a bunch in the next.