"Please don't let this be what you're trying to tell me…"
"Gabriella, let me explain…" Troy reached his hand out to touch her arm but she quickly backed away as if he had some sort of contagious disease.
"Yeah you really should because I'm not sure what the hell is going on right now!" She shouted as her body began to shake from fear. She began to breathe deeply as she felt suffocated.
Troy didn't know where to begin.
He was lost for words.
He was scared for his dear life because frankly, she looked like she would kill him at any second. Normally, her looks would make him weak in the knees anyway and practically give him a heart attack, but this time she meant business. This time her looks could literally kill him and not in a good way.
"Any day now, Troy!" Gabriella was starting to become hysterical with impatience. She couldn't understand how things became so dramatically fucked up in less than an hour and she still didn't have a clue as to what was going on.
"Gabriella…just hear me out. I know this whole thing seems bad and it is, you have every right to see it that way because I don't blame you. Look, I never meant to hurt you in anyway that I have, never. It was never intentional-"
"Just get to the point! Please just tell me whatever it is that you're getting at." She spoke firmly, avoiding his eyes so that he wouldn't see the tears that were edging to escape.
"Fine…here it goes. Gabbi…Remember I said that I was involved? I'm more than involved with Pamela…she's my wife. I'm married." Troy slowly stammered out and looked at her to see just how mad she would be. Gabriella turned around and gave him her back as she held herself. She didn't speak a word for what seemed like hours when in reality it was just a few minutes, worrying Troy to the maximum. "Gabriella? Please say something…"
Gabriella spun around and faced him, burning him with the furry that lasered out of her eyes. "What the fuck am I supposed to say? Huh? You tell me how the hell I'm supposed to feel about this! Jesus Christ, Troy! I feel like such an idiot!"
"Gabriella I never meant to hurt you, please know that. I'm truly sor-"
"Don't even say you're sorry! You are nowhere near being sorry yet! I can't believe you, Troy! Why didn't you just tell me this from the get go?" She marched over to him and pushed him hard against the wall. She wasn't one for violence but to her it seemed necessary at the moment since there wasn't a punch bag to take it out on around.
"I don't know…I wasn't thinking. Seeing you again just changed things for me and I didn't want to say anything that could mess up anything that could've happened between us…" Troy spoke softly, hoping to calm her down from her rage.
"Mess up anything that could've happened between us? What the hell do you think happened just now? This is the last time I allow you to hurt me…the fucking last time. You hurt me when you left me, you hurt me when you left Albuquerque, and you hurt me now! Three's a fucking charm, isn't it?" She said bitterly. Tears streamed down her face as she was frustrated and hurt and confused from everything happening at once. It was too much to handle. "That was low. That was extremely low of you to even lie to me and to cheat on your fucking wife, Troy. Gosh, you make me so sick right now!"
"I know…I'm a complete asshole for that but I mean it when I say that I'm sorry. I know that's not what you want to hear but I'll be damned if you don't understand just how sorry I am."
"I feel mind-fucked from all of this…Kelsi knew about this didn't she?!"
"It's not even like that Gab-"
"So what the hell was it like then, Troy? Could you freaking explain all this to me? Could you seriously just tell me what the fuck is with this situation?" Gabriella's hands were waving frantically as everything was building up inside.
"I'd be lying again if I said she didn't. But don't even bring her into this because she has nothing to do with what's going on between us right now…she didn't have any role in this at all." Troy defended.
"Well you know what? In my book she's just as bad as you right now because she knew! I feel so disgusted!" Gabriella felt so bitter but who could blame her?
"Gabriella, just please calm down. I know you're upset and you have every right to be-" Troy was cut off by her anger.
"Upset? You think I'm upset? It's more like pissed!" She yelled back.
"It's not like I meant to hurt you! It wasn't on purpose!"
"Whether you meant to or not, just so you know, you still did! You know what hurts the most? I didn't come all the way over here for a vacation or for the fun…I came here to find you! I came all the way across the country just to find you because I am so pathetic to not be over you and believed that there could've still been a chance at something! Do you have any idea how I feel? Do you know how this feels?" She held her hand over her heart when she said the last part.
"I could only imagine how hurt you feel…although I feel like shit I'm sure its nothing compared to how you feel. Hear me out, please…" Troy begged. When she stood silent, he took that as his cue to continue. "Pamela means a lot to me and when I married her I was sure that she could keep me happy for the rest of my life BUT it wasn't like I knew she was the one because I didn't think she was…I just thought she was good enough at being close to being the one for me. That spot was always reserved for you. I wasn't sure though if you'd even want to be with me because I figured you moved on after I left so I tried to move on too. Now I see it was a mistake and I'm truly sorry for that, I really am. When you came back into my life at the show, you proved me right about Pam being the second runner up to you. I never doubted my marriage for one second but this whole weekend, that's all I've been doing. You showed me how much of a complete idiot I was and how much of an asshole I am right now. You didn't deserve any of the pain I caused you then nor the pain you feel right now. I hate that all of it is my fault but I couldn't just let you leave without being honest with you. I still care about you, Gabriella…so much. I always have. You have no idea what you still mean to me. What just happened with us just now…I don't regret any of it…none. I do regret though how this turned out and I'm the one to blame for this confusion. Just please forgive me." Troy wasn't much of a begger unless it was necessary. Right now, it was way more than necessary.
"I don't know if I can Troy…listen, I just need some space right now…could you please just leave?" At least she wasn't yelling at him anymore. She looked so vulnerable as she stood about five feet away from him, tears cascading down her face as she shivered. Troy just wanted to hold her but he knew that was impossible at the time.
"Gabriella, plea-" Troy took a stepper closer to her.
"Troy just go, I can't do this right now…" Gabriella held her hand out in front of her to stop him from taking another step.
"Please don't be like this…I don't want – ", Troy tried to reason with her.
"Troy would you just stop! Don't make this any harder than it already is…just get the fuck out and leave me alone, will you?!" So much for not screaming anymore. She looked at him with a pleading yet angry look. Not wanting to anger her anymore, Troy slowly walked towards the door and looked back at her one last time.
"I really am sorry, Brie. Please don't hate me." He was gone. Gone for possibly forever but at the moment she didn't mind. Once that door closed, she fully let out her sobs that were begging to be released from her system. Her body shook uncontrollably as she flopped down onto the bed and buried her face into the pillow.
'How did this happen? How did I manage to get sucked into this situation and be left out alone all over again? You should've listened to yourself when you first decided to back off 'cause of his involvement, but no! You just had to flirt with him anyway! You're such a stupid girl! Stupid, stupid, stupid! I just want to go home…its all I want and need right now…besides a punching bag. Mental Note: Purchase one.'
Ten minutes later, Gabriella stood up from her spot on the bed and decided to quit feeling sorry for herself. She needed the comfort that her home could provide and decided that that was where she wanted to be. Quickly grabbing her things and stuffing them inside her suitcase and duffel bag, she rummaged through the drawer of the night table and found a pencil and a post-it pad. She scribbled a quick note down for Chad and Taylor to see.
Hey guys, I'm sorry to just leave on such short notice but I cant stay here a minute longer. I'll explain everything to you guys soon…I hope you understand. I grabbed the first flight back to New Mexico from JFK so don't worry about me…I'll be fine. Tay, I'm going to get my car back from your garage and drive back up to Cali. I'll call you once my plane lands. Love you both! Thanks for the road trip!
Love Always,
Gabriella
P.S. Just because I'm not there doesn't mean you guys could finally get down and dirty! Jk…I left my half of the money besides the room key on the night table for the way back.
Gabriella stuck the post-it against the bathroom door since she figured that that was the first place Chad would go and find it there. She left her room key on the night table. She switched on the light of the bathroom and stared at her reflection. Her hair was now a mess and how makeup was all over the place. She couldn't leave to the airport looking like that. She cleaned off her face and put her hair up into a ponytail and grabbed a sweater. This was it…she was leaving.
Gabriella walked out of the hotel and out to the sidewalk, hauling a cab to take her to her destination. Once she did, she went straight to the airport and purchased the first one-way ticket back to her home.
"Finally…I thought I'd never make it…" Gabriella muttered to herself while walking off the plane. It was 8:30 AM and she didn't sleep the entire plane ride since there was too much to think about. She didn't even want to think about it yet the problem that happened hours ago in New York keep replaying in her mind like a horror movie that you didn't want to watch, but you just couldn't take your eyes off it.
Now she was standing by the baggage claim, waiting for her bags so she could hurry up and leave. She looked like hell. Her eyes were still puffy and red from crying and lack of sleep, her hair was a mess, and she was still in last night's dress. The dress she's dying to take off for it reminded her of the dreadful event…even if she would remember the event either way.
Gabriella was slowly becoming a wreck…with a massive headache.
'I went all the way across the country only to have my heartbroken – again…by the same guy. That's pretty sad. It's like they say: Shame on you if you fool me once, shame on me if you fool me twice. Never realized how true that was until now. Well at least in my case, it was more than twice so I guess that just makes me a bigger fool. I should have saw this coming…I should've known that something else was there if he never even kept in contact with anyone. But was it really 'cause of his marriage? Who knows if there's more to it. Just strike me with lightning and kill me now, plea-' Gabriella's bags were arriving towards her on the machine, knocking her out of her rambling thoughts.
Pulling her baggage behind her, she stepped out of the airport and into the heat from the sunny morning in New Mexico. She pulled out her cell phone and dialed the all too familiar number, smiling to herself when the beautiful dark comforting face that possessed her best friend appeared on the screen.
"Hello? Gab's? Are you alright?"
"Hey Tay…yeah, I'm fine. I just arrived here at the airport in New Mexico."
"Good. I'm glad you're safe. How was the flight?"
"It was okay…I barely got any sleep in so I'm just exhausted. How was the rest of your night?"
"Pretty good actually. Chad and I had a blast! I got pictures of it and everything…you have to see them since Chad was basically drunk after you guys left. He was worse than a sailor or an Irish man at a pub. It's hilarious."
Gabriella laughed at the thought of how drunk Chad must've been. It was her first genuine smile after the incident. "Sorry that I left the club on such short notice, by the way."
"It's fine, really. Don't worry about. Does it have anything to do with the text Troy had sent us? He said that you weren't feeling well…"
How was she supposed to answer that? How was she even going to try working her way around the question? It was a lie and an excuse for them to leave to be alone. She knew that she was eventually going to talk about it and tell Taylor, but was right now the best time?
"Gabriella? You still there?"
"Yeah, I'm here. Sorry. I zoned out for a sec…what was your question?"
"That you leaving, did it have anything to do with you not feeling well?"
'I guess she would have to find sometime to fill her in, so why not now?' Besides, it would be about another week or so until we finally see each other again so I might as well tell her now.' she thought. "Taylor…I'm going to be completely honest and upfront with you. I wasn't sick at all."
"Okay then…so would you like to tell me what was going on then?"
"Uh…well…Troy and I left back to the hotel, not because I was sick, but because we just wanted to be alone. Things back at the club got hot and heavy for a bit and we just needed to get out of there before anything too exclusive happened." She bit her lip waiting for her friend's reaction.
"Figures. I think the whole world already knew that thought. Truth be told, Chad and I saw the whole thing between you guys on that dance floor and I do admit, it was pretty hot. I actually envy you for having such a steamy moment."
"You won't be envying me once I tell you the rest of the story…" Gabriella muttered.
"The rest? What happened?"
"How do I even begin to explain?"
"The best way that you can."
Gabriella contemplated over the confidential information and how to go about it. She stood silent thinking about what exactly she would say. Finally deciding that it was now or never, she took a deep breath and began.
"Pay attention because I'm only going to say this once and one time only. Got it? Good. Here goes nothing. Troy and I went back to the hotel room and things got even steamier when he kissed me and we made out and things were getting hotter when the tension got more erotic and he was all over me and I was all over him and it felt so good and right but things get messed up before either one of us could start removing clothes off the others body. I looked up at him confused because he was on top of me looking at me with such a lost expression and then he got off and then everything got all serious. Out of nowhere, Troy decided that the moment seemed like the best to finally drop a bomb on me of information that I didn't expect at all, which is that he's married. He's really married with a wedding ring and everything, Tay. To whom, you're wondering right? To the girl he was just 'involved' with, Pamela. That skank! Wait…I take that back because I don't even know her but I just hate her anyway. Anyway, I got pissed and we argued a lot and I'm hurt and upset and exhausted and I just need a freaking hug right now. So I kicked him out of the hotel room after everything and he tried apologizing so many times but I'm just not into hearing that bullshit right now. So here I am now, back in New Mexico because I didn't think I could handle another night in New York or a road trip back over here." Gabriella finally finished her rambling about the events of the night before. She felt so out of breath as her eyes began to water from mentally reliving the moment.
Taylor was at a loss for words, processing all of the data that went flying into her ears at 100 mph.
"I hope I didn't throw to much information at you at once."
"No, no…you didn't. I'm just in shock about all of it. I can't believe he's married and decided that he would tell you at that exact moment. The nerve of that guy."
"I know…I mean, I do appreciate that he did tell me but it still hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself anymore. I've practically been saving my love life for the day we could reunite but it's all screwed up because of that one detail. You know what that means? I've been pining over someone all these years for nothing! I could've been happily in love with someone else right now but I'm not. I'm a lonely wreck…"
"Hold you horses. Troy did the wrong thing and as much as I would like to think of him as a complete bastard right now, I can't help but to think that he did it with the best intentions. I know it's hard right now because it really is, but Troy wouldn't have done anything to hurt you, you know that. He fucked up big time but I'm sure it's eating his brain right now and that he's regretting the whole thing, which he should…serves him right. I watched you too this whole weekend so closely but I'm sure neither of you noticed since you guys were all 'goo-goo-gah-gah'. Anyway, that boy is still so utterly head over heels for you. Just don't walk away if he tries to redeem himself of the damage he's caused…neither of you would be happy if you really didn't."
"Tay…I don't know. Whose side are you on anyway?" she snapped.
"Neither. I just want you both to be happy…especially you. Troy's could drop dead at the moment."
"That's more like it!" Gabriella giggled. "Thanks for listening."
"Well, duh! How could I not listen when that's all you need the most right now? Anyway, I got to finish packing to start heading out with Danforth. My garage isn't locked so you could easily take your car." Taylor paused for a brief moment. "Listen sweetheart, things are rough right now but you're going to be fine. Don't think much about it and don't let it get to you. You're a lot stronger than you think."
"Thanks, Tay. I needed that. I'll let you go though. Besides, I got to catch a cab to your house. Call me later?"
"Of course. Talk to you then. Bye."
"Bye."
Gabriella stood along the curb at the passenger pickup area, spotting a taxi and walked over to it. Giving the cab driver the address to Taylor's house, she pulled out her cell phone once again and dialed a number.
The person on the other line picked up and Gabriella smiled to herself as she sat inside the now moving vehicle.
"Hey, mom. I was wondering if I could actually spend the night with you…"
Troy laid on his bed, feeling more miserable than ever.
He barely ate, barely slept, nor did he shower. After leaving the hotel, he went back to his lonesome apartment only to find Mugsy. He hasn't moved from his spot on his bed since he had got home and it was already the afternoon. He was still tense from the argument he had with Gabriella but there was nothing he could do now. It was all his fault that any of this even happened.
That was how he spent his entire morning – beating himself up. Troy felt as though he deserve every bad feeling that he felt…it was only right for him to be punished that way and even then he thought it wasn't enough.
His mind kept replaying everything over and over and over again, possibly making him go insane. He thought back to sexuality at the club all the way to the sparks and adrenaline from making out in her room. But that always led to the heartbreaking moment that he told her his secret. The vision of Gabriella crying and being upset was etched into his mind by a tiny laser controlled by the goblins in the dark. Nothing mattered anymore to him at that moment except for the pain he had caused one of the most important people of his life. Her words kept replaying in his mind and there was no pause or stop button.
"That was low. That was extremely low of you to even lie to me and to cheat on your fucking wife, Troy. Gosh, you make me so sick right now!" Bullet to the heart number one.
"Whether you meant to or not, just so you know, you still did! You know what hurts the most? I didn't come all the way over here for a vacation or for the fun…I came here to find you!" Bullet number two.
"Just get the fuck out and leave me alone, will you?!" Bullet number three and she hit it right on the target. No one else's fault but his own.
Now that he thought about it, things would have probably been better if he would've just admitted his marriage to Pam from the start. Sure, they wouldn't have had all the tiny special moments but at least she wouldn't have been pissed at him about anything. Who knew if Gabriella was even a part of his life anymore.
Troy stood up from his bed realizing that he had to do something about this. He wouldn't let her get away this time. He had left her too many times and lived without her all these years because of his stupidity that he just couldn't allow it to happen again. Troy knew he had to make his move in order for her to stay in his life, whether if it was as a friend or something romantic.
He needed Gabriella more than he ever thought.
He went to the bathroom and showered off all the stress that lingered onto his body, refreshing himself of the guilt that was stuck to him like permanent glue. He got out and dressed himself in basketball shorts and t-shirt. Rummaging through the cabinets of the kitchen, he pulled out Mugy's food and fed it to him in his bowl that was placed on the floor.
"Sorry if I've been neglecting you, Mugs. I've just been so bothered by my stupid mistakes lately that I haven't been paying mind to anything else. I'm a complete asshole, aren't I? I fuck things up with Gabbi, I question my marriage, and I neglect you. What's next? I lose my job? I hope not. Why did I let things get this way? Seriously. And why the heck am I talking to a dog…I swear I'm losing it." He shook his head and decided to go out for jog to clear his head.
Maybe even try to figure out how to fix things while he was at it.
I had tons of fun writing this chapter which is why it was posted so quickly since I knew what I wanted to do with it. I hope it lived up to the expectations of my readers and that you guys enjoyed it. I'm going to try to have my next chapter posted just as quick as this one was. I just wanted to give a quick thanks to everyone that has read my story so far. Thanks for sticking by it and reviewing and put it under your story alerts or favoriting it. It makes me feel good to know that people are liking what I write. So yeah, thanks!
If I had any typos in this chapter then please excuse them.
Review it!