A/N- Sorry for the long wait! Bit of writer's block further up on my list. Not to worry, I've moved past it and now I'm here! I really must thank everyone so much for their generous reviews! Now, please remember to vote in my forum if you haven't already! Thank you for those as well! Now, on with the chapter!

Chapter 3- Arrangements

Everyone's attention was on Harley. This drove the Joker nuts…well, nuttier than usual. Most of the time it was screams of terror and "oh, no! The Joker's out of Arkham again!" But this was not the case. No less than ten police officers, not including the Bat of course, had been assigned to the Clown Prince and Princess during the duration of Harley's pregnancy. Three of those officers were female. So, instead of screams of terror, alarm, and revulsion surrounding the Joker's and Harley's arrival at Wayne Manor, there were the cooing and awing at Harley's predicament. This made the Joker sulk.

He was roughly pushed off the little ramp onto the paved walkway leading towards the mansion's large front doors. Harley was gently led down by the hand. Even the male cops were giving her the whole "you're going to be a mommy" googly-eyed bit. Joker grumbled under his breath as Harley was escorted inside by two officers, and, who was apparently, Bruce Wayne's butler. This left him all alone with eight police officers and the Bat.

"What's your problem, Joker? Jealous of all the attention?" Batman said, a sardonic smile on his face. Or, at least as close to the smile as the Joker had ever seen the Bat have.

"Well, yeah, a little! I mean, it's my baby too! And I played a part in the scheme of things!" Joker replied as Batman grabbed one of his arms and led him inside.

"Yeah, a part that probably lasted all of…I'm going to guess, two minutes, am I right?"

The rest of the police officers had spread out to search and set up a perimeter. They didn't want the Joker escape. They didn't want Harley to escape either, but this seemed less likely to happen. Once Batman and the Joker were inside the mansion's entrance foyer, the psychopath wrenched his arm free of Batman's grip and crossed it with the other one angrily.

"I'll have you know that it was much, much longer than that…and more than one try, as well," the clown said, gleaming with joy at Batman's obvious disgust and uncomfort with the present conversation.

"My point being…you better take it easy on Harley. She's in a delicate position as it is, and myself and the officers here wouldn't want her to get hurt. Understand?" Batman asked, glaring at Joker.

Joker was spared trying to come up with a witty comeback as Harley--dressed as any normal citizen of Gotham would be--and the two officers came down the stairs.

"We've got hers and the Joker's room all set up, as well as heavily guarded. They're not going anywhere," one officer said to Batman.

"Why would I want to leave? Puddin', have you seen this place? It's huge and beautiful!" Harley exclaimed, throwing her arms around the Joker.

He hugged her back. Once he released her from his embrace, he turned to Batman.

"So, what's one got to do to get some grub around here?" he asked.

"First things first, Joker. We have plenty of details about Harley's pregnancy to work out. Besides, I think Mr. Pennyworth is preparing a lunch," Batman replied leading the two crazy convicts into a sitting room.

"Who's Mr. Pennyworth and what details?" Joker asked as he and Harley took seats. Immediately, they were flanked by three officers.

"Mr. Pennyworth is Mr. Wayne's butler. He's agreed to stay here and help out," Harley answered.

"And as for the details…we have to pick a doctor, decide about baby items, Lamaze classes and the like. Most importantly, we have to find out how I'm going to fit myself into all of these things," Batman said, standing before the mad couple.

"This is going to be a long nine months," Joker said, yawning.

"Technically, only six months. I'm already three months along, puddin'," Harley said.

"Oy," her lover replied, slapping a hand to his forehead.

"My thoughts exactly," Batman muttered to the nearest officer, who smiled.

End Notes: Okay, obvious, this fic will skip months as the story progresses and hit the high and funny points of the pregnancy. However, I'll try to make them all smooth. Please review!