House, Cuddy, and Blythe were in the kitchen waiting for Grey and Kasumii to arrive with Grey's cousin Perri. As soon as House had agreed to having her, Cuddy had put things in motion and in the predicted three weeks everything had been arranged, parental permission included.
The three weeks since their conversation – and incidentally the beginning of the new phase in their relationship – had gone surprisingly fast and painlessly. Cuddy visited House two, three times a week and on those nights they weren't together they still often talked on the walkie-talkies. Though mostly about the kids, things concerning the house and the House-hold that they hadn't been able to talk about during the day; not much dirty talking at all. Cuddy had wondered about that once, but House had just shrugged and said that he preferred to lower expectations, not to raise them. Cuddy had kept her own council on that.
At work Petra had used a week to glare at House, even when it turned out that she had been right about the Chagas disease, but she had simmered down eventually. House suspected she had talked with Wilson and had thus gained some perspective to things. After all, it was a little difficult to suspect a man of Nazi sympathies when his best – and only – friend was a Jew. The second week after the near-resignation Dr Chandrakanta had arrived to take Cameron's place – not that Cameron had left yet, she had still had a week before starting her new job. Foreman had called Cuddy to tell her that Chandrakanta had accepted House's offer. He had also asked Cuddy to keep an eye on the new doctor, since he didn't trust House. Cuddy had assured him that should House be too impossible she would find some other position for Dr Chandrakanta in the hospital.
Surprisingly, though, House had been almost gentle with his new fellow. Chase – who had been told on the pain of death not to sleep with his co-workers – had been surprised enough at this strange behaviour on House's part to actually ask what was going on.
"Contrary to popular belief," House had informed him. "I do not crush people who can be crushed. I'm not yet sure that Chandrakanta can handle me and my ways, so she is still under observation. If she turns out to be too fragile, you can have her."
"Have her?" Chase didn't understand House's pronouncement at all.
"Yes," House informed him looking at him like he ought to know what was going on, then he made a face and said: "Oh, yes, I forgot, you don't know yet. The board only just approved Cuddy's motion."
"What motion?" Chase was still in the dark.
"She wants to expand the department of Diagnostics," House explained. "There will be a second team with you in charge. You get Wilson's new office, once he moves back to his old one. Of course, you don't get a conference room, but the office is big enough for you and your team. If Chandrakanta can't work with me, she'll be perfect for you."
"What if I have other plans?" Chase asked partly flattered partly indignant. House and Cuddy had arranged his future without so much as by your leave!
"Do you?" House asked, knowing full well that he didn't.
"No," Chase admitted. "I was going to take some time off and review my options. I know there is an opening in the NICU here in a month's time. I was sort of thinking that if nothing else comes up I'll try for that."
"Well, something has come up," House said. "Of course if you don't want it, just say so. I'm sure there will be plenty of applicants for the position once it's announced."
"I... It's..." Chase had been unable to come up with anything sensible to say.
"Think about it," House told him. "Just remember, you cannot hire Cameron."
"Why not?" Chase was suddenly able to speak.
"Because she needs to get away from me," House acknowledged ruefully. "And I'm fairly sure it would be better for her to have some distance from you, too. At least for a while."
"So if I accept what then?" Chase wanted to know.
"Then you start looking for a team," House stated. "There will be plenty of applications, not only because this is still my department, though you will head an independent team, but you will also garner some interest as your father's son. You can sort the male applicants on your own, or with Wilson. I'm hiring my third fellow from the girls, so we'll interview them together."
"You want an all-female team?" Chase was awed. "What's the deal with that? Are you aiming for House's Angels or something?"
"More like a House's Harem," House leered. "Better alliteration."
"Don't you have enough women at home?" Chase asked.
"Yeah, but with the possible exception of the new Nanny's assistant that is on her way, I don't get to order them about," House revealed.
"What will Dr Cuddy say to this harem of yours," Chase cautioned.
"She'll have no problem with it as long as I remember that the root word for harem means forbidden," House pointed out.
"Fair enough," Chase agreed.
Cameron had briefed Chandrakanta well before her own departure to Penn and House had his mail sorted and his coffee ready without any break in the routine. He was happy to find out that Foreman had been right about the coffee: Chandrakanta really did make better coffee than Cameron. Most of the time he almost had to make a special effort to even find her in the room; she could blend into her surroundings like a chameleon. House suspected it had been drilled into her as a child with all the other things that a properly brought up Indian girl needed to know. He rather thought he could find use for that talent if he decided to keep her. They had had only one patient since Chandrakanta had joined the team, and even that House had taken on more to observe his new fellow than to diagnose the patient. It had been a fairly simple case of Encephalitis. She had participated in the Differential as a full member of the team, though she always agreed with anything House said. That didn't bother House, since he was used to it from Chase and Petra was there to disagree with pretty much anything he said – which she did vehemently. House wasn't quite sure yet, but he rather suspected that Chandrakanta would stay in his team and Chase would need to get all his team himself.
Now House was standing in his kitchen – or in the main kitchen of his house – waiting for Perri Grey to arrive and start helping Kasumii with the kids. He had been a little surprised that her parents had agreed to let her come to the states for two years, even if she was going to have a cousin looking after her and even if she was going to take night classes to finish her education. But Grey had said that though her parents did love their kid, they were more career orientated than Grey really thought was good for Perri. Grey thought she was a little lost and he was hoping to help with that.
House didn't get any further with his musings before the sounds told him that the trio had arrived. Kasumii was the first one to enter the kitchen and she gave House a pleading look mouthing the words: "please give her a break" to him. That was not very reassuring but did prepare him for the arrival of the girl herself. Morticia Adams meet Pink was House's first thought. Perri was dressed all in black. She had black jeans that rode low enough to make one almost question if she had reached puberty yet. Her t-shirt had been cut short, so it just covered her breasts. She did have a coat on her arm when she arrived so at least she had enough brains to protect herself against the elements. She set the – black – coat down on a chair. She had piercings on her navel, her lip, her nose and her eyebrow, and naturally she had six earrings on each ear. House was relieved to see that they were just normal earrings, none of those thick ones that actually mutilate the ear. Her hair was long and black, except for pink and purple stripes, it hung straight to her waist. Her face was covered in make-up, black lipstick, black mascara – and lots of it – black eye-shadow and almost white foundation. Yet under all this bold I don't care facade there seemed to be something very young and uncertain – something very teenage. House sighed.
Grey saw House raise an eyebrow at him and he sent an apologetic look back. He had seen his cousin over a year ago and hadn't realised how bad things had got until he had seen Perri again. He was hoping House would not just dismiss Perri as trouble and send her back. Grey was sure that underneath all that black there was still the same little cousin he knew. He saw House sigh and set his mug on the kitchen counter. Then House shrugged his shirt off, revealing the red t-shirt he had under it. House turned to rummage in the kitchen drawers, found a clean towel, wet it under the tap and then he limped to Perri. He took a good, solid grip of Perri's neck and washed her face with the towel.
House lifted the towel away from the face in front of him and met Perri's indignant stare: "I like to see who I'm talking to," he stated calmly. "The mascara you have to remove yourself, it seems to be waterproof."
"How..." Perri tried to talk but House put the towel back on her face to wipe off the rest of the make-up.
"My house, my rules," House informed her. "If you don't like them... Planes fly to England every day." House saw a flash of something in the teenager's eyes. Not exactly fear, but something a little akin to it. Maybe more loneliness and some defeat. "Here, button it up, all the way," House held his shirt to Perri expecting her to put her arms through the sleeves. Once she complied House rolled the sleeves up and took a look at her hands: long, black nails: "Those talons won't get anywhere near my kids. Lose the polish and cut the nails." He took a closer look at the hands. "In fact, you may need some advice in hand-care to start with. Kasumii will take you shopping tomorrow. You need clothes that you can wear for work. She will choose them. Your current outfit is not suitable. She will also take you to have your nails done. Kasumii, make sure they also advice her on how to take care of her hands. (Sure, Kasumii promised). You will not wear any makeup and you need to lose the piercings too. You won't like it if Aiko gets her hands in one of them and yanks. And you most definitely will not like what will happen if she or one of the trips swallows any of them after they have yanked. You may wear one pair of earrings when you're not working and the one in you navel you may keep as well since it will be under your clothes at all times. The hair is cool, though you have to braid it for work. Any tattoos?"
"One," Perri didn't think not answering or lying was an option. Her new boss almost scared her, though he had been pretty gentle with that towel. Also it was oddly reassuring to have an adult to take charge like this. At least it was on some level, on another it was infuriating: like she was a kid or something. "In my butt."
"That's ok," House accepted. "You won't be showing it to anyone anyway, unless there is a medical reason in which case you will show it to Dr Cuddy. And that, by the way, was not an optimistic assumption on my part. It was an order. You. Will. Not. Show your butt to anyone while you live under my roof. Clear?"
Perri nodded though a little rebelliously, but she didn't want to go back to England. At home she might be able to do what she wanted, but she was also horribly lonely. She wasn't going home on the first plane, no way. Maybe later, but not yet.
"Are you a virgin," was the next personal question which elicited audible protests from Kasumii, Cuddy and Blythe (House! Gregory!). Perri blushed from head to toe.
"Who the hell would want me," she muttered almost under her breath.
"No swearing," House admonished her. "There is room for only one person who is crude, rude and socially unacceptable in this house and that's me. No other vacancies. As for guys wanting you, you have a pulse don't you? For most guys that is all they need. Teenage boys are a lot less picky than you believe. Losing your virginity is not the problem. Losing it so that you won't feel like shit for days afterwards is the difficult thing. You need to learn to be picky. You have that right. Anyway, you won't be dating any time soon. You'll be too busy with work and classes. Any questions?"
"None," Perri felt her head was whirling. She was sure she had questions if only she could remember them!
"Good," House accepted. "My mother will show you to your room and she will help you to unpack. If none of your clothes are suitable for wearing in this house, she, too, will take you shopping for clothes that you will then wear when not dressed for work. And that reminds me, you will not give her any lip under any circumstances. Ever. Dr Cuddy is the mother of the children and you may try to give her some lip if you feel brave, but let me tell you, she can cut you to size with half a sentence if she wants to. You can give some lip to me, if you really feel like you cannot contain yourself, and if it's amusing I may forgive you. But no matter what, you will always, always do as you're told. Clear? You are now working with my children and that is a position of trust even if you will take all your instructions from Miss Tanaka. The children's wellbeing comes first, always. You understand that?"
"Yes, sir," Perri voiced, not very clearly but still perfectly audibly. House chose to take that as a promise, too.
"Come along dear," Blythe decided to take the teenager to her room before House came up with any more outrageous questions or instructions. "He really isn't that bad once you get to know him (oh yes I am) and the rest of the House-hold you will get along with just fine. Your room is rather bare right now, just the basics, but if you don't have enough personal things to make it your own, we can go shopping and get what you want."
Once Perri and Blythe – and Kasumii who followed them, had got out of the room House turned to face Grey: "You do know that from this day forward I so own your ass!"
"Yeah, I do know," Grey grimaced. "I'm sorry. I didn't know things had gone that far with her. I'm sure she is ok and she has always adored kids, but it seems that her parents are paying even less attention to her than I thought."
"Actually, I agree with you," House sighed as he picked up his mug again. "She looks pretty much like a standard, confused teenager. Too much freedom, not enough boundaries, and low self-esteem due to neglect. Parents may love her, but she doesn't know that."
"I think I may have my work cut out for me," Grey agreed ruefully.
"You're not alone with her," House reassured him. "The ladies will be happy to help you."
"What about you?" Grey queried. House had certainly taken over quite impressively just now.
"I'm her boss," House pointed out. "That is my main role. But if I can help, I'll help. Don't count on my ability to help too much, though."
"Every little thing helps," Grey responded turning to follow the women to Perri's room. Once his back was to House, he did, however, smile. Widely.