A/N: Thanks to everyone who's read this so far, please do review! This is the chapter where Light and his ghost L get 'intimate' and was harder to write than I expected. The style of haunting for this fanfic and the atmosphere was something I've tried to get just right so I really want to know what people think of it. One of the things about the story which was a bit hard for me to write how I wanted was L's perspective. I didn't want to ever say 'L thought this' or 'it did this' because I wanted it to be like his form is different now. Anywho so do review and tell me what you think!
Sublimation
Light washes in the morning, he showers and scourers, he dresses in his expensive suits, he brushes his hair. He is neat. He is handsome. He is charming. He works calmly, efficiently, professionally. He socialises beautifully. The funeral for Misa was perfect, he cried softly to an extent that did not ruin his composure and his colleagues and friends sympathised pleasantly. He brought back lilies and lays them on the wooden sill in what was his bedroom. He stares at them desolately when he waits.
It doesn't mean anything. Or he doesn't know what it means. He wanted to see if it did mean anything. Whether there was a reaction to the flowers of mourning. He did not know what to expect.
Nothing was done though. Light had made the room so dark, he had tried so hard but when he woke he found all the shutters wrenched away so that in the night he could still see the shadows, the movement by the sill, the shape, the silhouette, as it moved across the room, closer towards him.
Then Light would look away and back again and sometimes it was gone. Sometimes it was still there. Sometimes he saw the eyes.
When it was gone, Light's eyes flitted about in panic.
Eventually he would lie still though. Then the sheets would shift. Tonight he feels the movement near his feet, the sheet move upwards and Light feels the sensation of being crawled over. The hands move along his sides.
Light closes his eyes and lies still and there is silence although he can still feel the presence against him. Sometimes he manages to just sleep, to just lie in silence and sleep. Not tonight though, not tonight.
He lies still and pretends. Then, when he has felt hours stretch on and nothing around his flesh has changed he opens his eyes…
…and sees him above him. His scrawl of black hair hiding part of his face, his glittering eyes. He is just staring at him. Just staring.
Light's eyes stare back. There is silence. There is always silence. Light never speaks, never tries. There are questions that ache inside him but he is always paralysed when this presence steals over him. There are too many questions that can be voiced.
Tonight however just one permeated through his brain as he stares up into that glittering black eyes; what do you want? What do you want? What do you want?
'What do you want?'
And it actually manages to leave him, in the quietest of whispers.
The expression is all he can see, all he catch now. The eyes just ache, the lips twist.
There is no such thing as wanting. There is hardly any distinct emotions. Only a drive. Just one thought, one imperative. It is absolute. Light. Light Yagami. Light. Light. Light. Light. Light. Light. Light.
Light feels the sensation of nails digging into his fingers, then a trembling in the air. Without any mental processes soliciting the motion Light finds himself reaching up with cold determination. His hand meets with something before him, he can no longer see anything, it is darkness, but he feels the weight, the warmth of a chest. It grows warmer and more sure under his hand. Softly he moves his hand upwards to touch at a neck, to feel the ripple of a jawline.
It is the first time Light has reached out to the ghost. His fingers, trembling, can really feel him in the darkness and he strokes, short measured motions.
There is a silent pause and then, then Light feels the sheets slip downwards upon him slightly and there is a rustling amongst him. Then he feels a tug at the material at his waist.
Marionette Light again; his shoulders tense, he is paralysed. Gently the disturbance moves over him and like a doll, shameless, will-less, lifeless, Light Yagami is stripped.
He shivers. He feels the warmth on him, the fingers the flesh, all around him; this presence. The sheets shift and it is above him now. Light can feel it. It is shuddering around him, like a wind, like static.
He feels the sharp, alien feeling once more of those fingers on him, of that touch, one which has become so familiar to him. It ripples sharply down his throat and then down past the skin into Light's chest making him shudder and then every muscle in his body tense up at the unnatural contact.
It is stronger than usual. The touch crawls through him. It is clawing over his body. The desperation shudders and gasps in the air, the hysteria, the single fixation, one emotion, one thought, forced into action.
The bed shakes.
And the touching, extreme by nature, is even more so. Light can perceive the form in the dim light, just a pale shadow coiled around him, that strange hot transmutable flesh made real where the contact is.
Then the fingers move to his back, they grip and enter the flesh, the nails tickle at the inner muscle, the warmth permeates. Light shivers and gasps. It is upon him, all over him, his skin is hot, too hot, soaked in sweat. He reaches out to cling to the assailant, the sensation. His hands grip at a hot wet back, the fingers slip with the motion that has now overcome him; he feels damp hair in his grasp.
And then Light Yagami feels his body being raised off the bed. With nothing beneath him the sheets hang over him limply. He is raised higher, the sensation terrifying, and brought upright then pressed to the wall, pinned by his visitor.
Then, then…Light feels that warmth, that flesh sublimating again but this time it is a complete stretch of Light's body, it is from the waist down, and it is far more intimate a sensation. It envelopes his hips, his thighs, his privates, it actually penetrates into his pelvis, into his dick.
It is the most shocking thing that Light has ever experienced, his teeth clench and he gasps and stutters but there is little time for anything else because the sensation consumes him. The hot tingling, the vibrations, the electrifying pulses shake his body from that point where his hips meld with his keeper's.
It is but brief moments, punctuated with Light's head and back banging hard against the wall, and Light is unbearably hard, impossibly tight, already a little wet, a few drops trickling down to his thighs.
The feeling is all consuming, impossibly acute. It roars and thunders through him, it is pulsing through every single nerve, it is massaging every little molecule of the most sensitive of Light's flesh. It is underneath the skin, right down where everything is raw and red and Light can only groan while it thunders through him, his legs dangling down from his suspension in the tangle of sheets.
It increases in intensity in every second. Light moans and pants while his naked body shudders against the wall.
He can feel the other's breath against him, on his face, on his neck, panting. Then he is all over him. Light is moist and slippery with sweat but also something more, like hot condensation.
Light clutches, Light clings, the touch melts into the other. They mingle.
Light is lost. Light is screaming with pleasure.
He comes, ejaculating not once, or even twice, but three times, in succession, each release building upon the last, until there is nothing more for Light's body to yield.
And Light Yagami hangs limp, then slowly his body slides down against the wall, lowered back to the bed.
The damp sheets twist around him. He lies still, curled up on the mattress, naked, panting.
He lies still. His eyelids flicker a little, the delicate lashes fluttering against the sweat and his damp hair.
He feels the warmth beside him, amongst the sheets that are coiled around him.
It is just there. Just close. Just the presence beside him. Light's fingers reach out and coil in the air and then his eyelids slide shut again and he falls unconscious.