South Park property of T. Parker and M. Stone. Ella Tweak belongs to meh!

Will get back to the main story and new OC goodness in the next chapter, but I just ate a boatload of Fun Dip and I'm hyper. Hehehe. Also, writing kids is kinda fun. ^.^

*

The Park – 4th grade.

Craig Tucker folded his arms impatiently. A kindergartener was on his favorite swing. The only swing in the entire park, and possibly the entire world, that didn't squeak. Ordinarily he would have had no problem throwing his weight around, but the girl's mother was right there, pushing her daughter as she giggled. He could feel the woman looking at him. There was, after all, a perfectly good empty swing beside them. A swing that squeaked. When the woman frowned at him, he wordlessly flipped her the bird and trudged towards the sandbox. A large group of kids had gathered around with a few concerned parents looking on. Craig pushed his way to the front of the pack and then stopped dead in his tracks.

Gerald Broflovski, resplendent in a pair of sandy tighty-whities, took a weak swipe at Kenny McCormick.

"She's mine you little asshole!"

Craig didn't hear Kenny's reply, but watched as he tried to fend off the grown-up. The front of his orange parka was stained with what looked like pee. Craig was jolted out of staring by a nudge at his elbow. He looked over and saw Ella Tweak beside him, her mouth open in horror. Craig frowned and clapped a hand over her eyes.

"Don't look." He said, turning her around. "I'm taking you home." He pushed his way out of the crowd, his hand still firmly over Ella's eyes only to bump into Towelie.

"Oh hey kid… wanna get high?" Towlie asked with a hopeful look.

"No. No I don't." Craig skirted Towelie as though he might be contagious and when they exited the park, removed his mittened hand and restored Ella's sight. "I hate this town." He said and tugged on the sleeve of her powder blue coat until she followed him.

Ella walked quietly next to Craig for a minute. Word had obviously spread about the sandbox smackdown, and the pair dodged people rushing in the direction of the park hoping for their daily dose of South Park's unique insanity.

"Craig." Ella said. "What were they doing?" She stopped to play hopscotch on the sidewalk, earning another impatient tug on her sleeve.

"I don't know." Craig said. "Hurry up, crybaby."

Ella walked along in silence until they reached Alpine Court and stopped outside her blue house. "You could come in for cookies." She offered politely. "Oatmeal."

"Oatmeal cookies are too bumpy." He replied, zipping up his coat and walking her up to the door. He waited in silence as she rattled the doorknob and then knocked.

"Tweek! It's Ella!" she rang the bell.

Craig's eyes widened as Tweek opened the door, accompanied by Butters. Both of the small blonde boys had assorted bows in their hair.

"GAH! Omigod-" Tweek pulled frantically at the bows, embarrassed to find Craig Tucker on the porch as well as his sister. He let Ella pass. "ACK!"

Craig looked on impassively as Ella waved a farewell and Butters tried to reassure Tweek. He looked at the door for a moment after it closed and then turned to walk home.

Before he reached the end of the court, the wind kicked up and soon Craig was pelted by swirls of wet, stinging snow.

"Goddammit."

The events take place during "Major Boobage". I just sorta wanted to slip a comment about Butters and Tweek's relationship in there. Of course… any excuse to have fun with Craig is fine too. ^.^