A/N: And here is another chapter...
"Raul," Faolan whispered, her voice the softest breeze in the darkened room. It was night, and Fao could feel the moonlight's rays burning through the walls and ceiling. It itched, like skin just before a sunburn.
:I'm here: the filly said, and sure enough, Fao could make out a white shape laying beside the bed and gazing into the dying embers of the fire. It was chilly, but quilts piled over her and kept her warm.
"Something's happening," Fao whispered, her voice cracking with fear as her hands convulsively made fists around the blanket and pulled it around her, "My skin hurts."
:Now?: Raul asked and she stood up, pushing her legs up beneath her and then she nudged Faolan gently with her soft nose.
"Yes," the words cracked from teeth that were now clenched shut and her eyes started up at the ceiling, no longer seeing anything, "It hurts Raul."
The hot oil was churning through her veins once more and the image of that too-big wolf with green eyes boiled in her mind and she almost felt like he was there, in front of her, burning her down with those flaming green eyes.
:It will: Raul said as Faolan started shaking all over, her body convulsively twitching and moving as her blood burned holes through her flesh.
"What is it?" whimpered Faolan, closing her eyes and biting her lip so hard that a warm, metallic taste filled her mouth.
:You know what it is: Raul said, her voice a soft whisper in Fao's mind and she wanted to hug the filly, she wanted to be hugged but she couldn't get her arms to do that and Raul didn't have arms of her own.
"I don't want it to come," Fao whispered, but that was too hard, so her next words she only thought them, :Make it stop.:
Raul was silent and unbidden, someone started speaking in her mind. An old voice, fatherly and kind, and he spoke as if reading from a book...
"Werewolves have been around for a long time, as long as humans and perhaps longer. They are those cursed by the moon, taken in by its call. It has been theorized that the first werewolf came from longing too much and too long, the way a wolf does when it howls at the moon. Today, werewolves are made when one bites a human, but does not kill him or her. They can change any time the moon is out, but usually they can withhold the change, except on the three days that are the day before the full moon, the full moon, and the day after, then the call is too strong and the bitten is forced to change into a creature not quite wolf, more evil, more dark, and not at all human."
"I never want to meet one," I answered, looking up at the man sitting in the rocking chair, the firelight playing softly over his lined face.
"I hope you never will Natasha," the man answered with a smile, lifting his loving eyes up and peering at me through glasses, before turning back to the book that rested on his lap...
:Has there ever been a werewolf in Valdemar?: Faolan asked. It felt like a long time had passed and she still drifted in a dreamlike sleep, her eyes closed and unseeing. But she knew Raul would hear.
:Not that I know of: Raul said, and then added, :You may be the first Valdemaren to be bitten.:
:Where did he come from?: Faolan asked, thinking of the green eyed wolf- werewolf. The pain was gone, but Faolan knew if she came back to her body a little more it would still be there, raging and tearing away at her flesh like fast forwarded sunburn.
:Hardorn perhaps. Or Karse… Or maybe somewhere farther away: Raul mused, :We will never know.:
Something in the way that she said that made Fao pause and she inquired after a moment's consideration, :What happened to him?:
:He is dead: Raul said softly and Fao opened her eyes and saw her Companion gazing away, a hint of sadness about her, :There is no way to save a werewolf. You must be very careful Fao.:
:Did you kill him?:
:Yes. I did. But at that moment, he was not a Valdemaren, he was not even human. I will not say a werewolf is better off dead, where there was no hope for him. He did not have a Companion to help him through what he had done to you and undoubtedly to others, nor did he have a Companion to stop him from doing it. I am not justifying the murder, remember that Faolan, for it was murder, I am simply explaining to you why it had to be done.:
:I think I'd rather have died: Faolan said, and because her eyes were open she was beginning to feel the pain again, :I don't want to live with this.:
:Faolan: Raul said and Fao turned her eyes once more upon the filly, :I think there is a reason you are here today.:
Fao only stared at Raul, not really comprehending what was being said and then something in the way the Companion had said something, before, clicked in her head and she asked, :Are we still at war? With Karse?:
:Yes: Raul answered but if she was going to say more it was cut off as Fao felt a pain like a knife stabbing through her and a scream tore through her lips. She could not longer see the room, nor Raul, and there were knives stabbing her, all over, everywhere and it hurt more than anything, more than the Bite itself and Fao knew there was no way she could live through it.
"Hold back!" someone yelled, "Hold it back!"
I can live through it, Fao thought and her thoughts returned to her, crystal clear, and the pain was still there but she could think. She took a long slow breath, that felt as if she was inhaling the knives now, but it could be ignored, like those memories. Set aside and thus dulled. She pulled open her eyes and looked up at a fuzzy and skewed Raul.
:You will grow to be an extraordinary person: Raul said and there was a smile in her voice, although her shape couldn't express that.
:I feel like I should be dead, but I'm living: Faolan said, and she knew that if that memory of pain control hadn't surfaced she be unconscious right now.
:It's almost over: Raul answered and nudged her softly.
Fao picked up a hand and saw it was a paw, covered in thick gray and white fur with a red tinge to it, like the tips of each strand was red. Her eyesight clicked, like putting on a pair of glasses, and she could see again, but it was different.
:The change is not only physical: Raul warned a moment later and as she said it Faolan felt something in the back of her mind changing now, in the same painful way that her body had changed.
:I know: Fao said, feeling a deep chill deep inside of her as the wolf tore out of her mind and out of her mouth in a high pitched, angry growl.
She leapt to her paws and stared up at Raul but then fell, tripping over the shirt that was much too big for her now and hung around her legs and over her chest awkwardly. She shook her head and it slipped down and when it was off she bit it, ripping it to shreds with tiny, needle like teeth and tore at it with the sharp claws on her paws, claws that would dull as she grew older.
When it was only bits of cloth she looked up at the thing that smelled of horse, the thing that called itself Raul and she felt a red rage come over her, turning her vision red. Saliva foamed in her mouth and she felt her tiny body shaking with the anger of it. It's all her fault! something inside her screamed, It's all her fault!
:No: a voice said firmly into her mind, and it took Fao a moment to identify as Raul's. When she did her rage, if possible, burned brighter and she snarled her answer to Raul, her fur bristling.
:No Faolan: Raul said again, her eyes flashing in an arrogant, demanding fashion that made Fao want to bite something.
And then, while Fao was musing over the ways to kill a Companion, the door was suddenly open, and a cold breeze was wrapping itself into the room, curling around her and with it, the moonlight. Shining, like a mage light, into the room. The moon itself hung bright and full over the horizon, reaching its beams through the bare winter trees and to her.
Yes, Faolan thought, rejoicing in the feel of the light over her fur, relishing it. She had prayed to the moon and it had answered, giving her the gift of life in the face of death, and a life better than it had been before. Raul forgotten, Fao jumped off the bed, her small form darted across the floor and past four white pillars that made up Raul's legs and out into the forest. There was no snow, not yet, and the ground was too hard for her to make prints.
Pausing she looked back at the shelter that had housed her for so long, knowing she'd never see it again, or Raul. It was a Waystation, one for the Heralds, but one little used. She would have to go far to find someone, to find people, but she would, and then everyone would pay for the hurts she had suffered, now and in all her other lives.
Suffer, she thought blood thirstily and burst into a run, stumbling over the leaves and branches on the path with typical puppy-like lack of grace.
:Faolan: said a voice and a white shape, large, ducked around her and stood in front of her, blocking the way. Fao snorted through her nose and sprang through the legs, but as she came out to freedom again a white leg stomped down in front of her, once more demanding.
:No: Fao snarled back, looking up at the Companion above her, :You are not my Master:
:You will not let it consume you Faolan: Raul said but her voice had lost its edge and it was soft and kind and for a moment Fao believed her, but then the moment was gone and she ran off. When Raul did not chase her she rejoiced, rolling in the leave and biting sticks. There were no animals for her to chase, for it was winter, but Fao knew that this world was hers and come spring the entire forest, and then all of Valdemar would know it...
Later...
"Raul!" Faolan cried out, her eyes leaping open to a cold, frozen world. Tears were seeping down her face and freezing and it was so cold…
:I'm here: Raul said, and Fao's eyes flickered up to the white form standing over her, :Get on my back.:
Fao nodded slowly and pulled herself to her feet as Raul lay down. She took the filly's mane in one hand and scrambled on, laying down over Raul's neck and holding on tight to the warm body as Raul stood up once more. Although she was trying to ignore them, to reject them, memories surfaced that reminded her body of her balance, of how to sit on a horse, although most of them got muddled up in the fact that she was much smaller than she had been last time she walked the earth on horseback.
But Raul's movement was comforting, and she was warm, and Fao buried her face into the Companion's mane and let herself cry, ignoring all the adults thoughts in her head and letting herself be three years old.
Soon, sooner than Faolan expected, they were inside a warm room and the cold wind was away and she was wrapped up in quilts and a fire was burning merrily and Raul was laying down beside the bed, her head along Fao's body and everything was warm…
Hours later she awoke once more. She judged it to be midday, although she had nothing to go on but her sense of time and how hungry she was. Raul was still asleep, her eyes closed and her breathing peaceful. Fao ran her hands along the Companion's white face, her fingers gentle and light as she traced the spiral of hairs at Raul's forehead. Fao's face was dry and she no longer felt the overwhelming unhappiness from the morning when the moon had set and she had changed back to human, that disgust at the feeling she could so clearly remember. Her past lives were back as well, and helping her.
"I feel sorry for the child that is bitten and doesn't know how to handle it," Fao whispered, thinking of how she felt and imagining what it would be like if she was unable to feel any other way. Would they be able to live with it? A strong child perhaps, one used to hardship, but not a pampered middle class or noble baby.
I am different, Fao thought, looking at her small, smooth hands, My life will never be the same.
A/N: I do have one question before you leave to those with this story on Alert... If you like the story enough to put it on alerts, can't you find something to say about it in a review? I have nothing against people who read a story and don't review it because they have no feelings about it but... I really would like feedback on this! Say it's crap if that's what you think. I do not roast marshmallows on flames