Thunk! An arrow sunk deep into the wood of a tree. Faolan picked up another arrow and strung it onto the bow, pulling back the string with delight at the ease of handling. She grinned up at Raul before releasing this arrow. It landed closer to the center of the target, but still not quite there.

:You know Faolan, we'll be leaving soon: Raul commented lightly as the girl admired her random patterning of arrows stuck into the target tree and the trees around it.

"I really like this bow," she said, holding up the one she'd made over the past months and running her hand down the bowstring which happened to be made of Companion's tail hairs and shimmered like moonlight in the darkness. The bow itself she'd painted black, using a mixture of things they'd found in the storage part of the Waystation.

:It's an impressive accomplishment: Raul agreed, looking at the shiny black paint through which you could just barely see the wood grains, :I'm proud.:

Faolan glanced up once more, feeling surprising happy by Raul's statement and with renewed vigor she shot another arrow out at the tree, however- it thoroughly missed. A few hours they returned to the Waystation for dinner- the eastern horizon was starting to lighten.

"I'm not sure I want to go to Haven," Fao confided as she perched on the edge of the bed, digging into a bowl of oatmeal flavored with the last of the cinnamon. She wore only an undershirt and her thinnest pair of pants. Her feet were bare, for two reasons. One, she'd outgrown her boots, and the second was that it was high summer and shoes were no longer entirely needed.

:I know I want to go, but I have misgivings about the welcome you'll receive: Raul said, bobbing her head.

"I really don't like condescending adults, and I'm afraid I'll meet some in Haven," Faolan added, "I've never met any in this life, and back when I knew adults I was still actually a three year old."

Absentmindedly she reached and under her shirt to touch the two scars on her shoulder that marked the changing of her life. Raul heaved a sigh and then went back outside, leaving the door open to let in some ventilation and started nosing at some grass growing in patches that were probably sunny during the day.

"And everyone will probably treat me like a kid," Faolan said with disgust, raising her voice so Raul could still hear, "And we'll have to get up in the morning."

She slid off the bed and stepped outside, peering at the horizon and added, "Instead of going to bed."

:You'll get used to it: Raul said but Faolan was sure as she went back inside and lay down on the bed, drifting slowly into a confused sleep.

Faolan threw her head back, her eyes staring wide and unseeing at the ceiling and her fingers clenched tightly into fists. And then just as she had tensed she relaxed and fell backwards onto the bed, her eyes slipping shut and her body only shaking the tiniest bit. Raul watched silently as the fire crackled and spat and fur slowly spread across Faolan's body. Her bones began to twist and move and the Companion closed her eyes, looking away. Meanwhile Faolan basked in sunlight scenery, totally gone from her body to escape the pain.

"An apple?" a voice asked and I turned my head, peering over my shoulder and letting a gentle smile cross my face at the sight of the well dressed young man standing behind me, a shiny red piece of fruit balanced in his outstretched hand.

"Thank you, sir," I told him politely, giving him my sweetest look as I plucked the apple from his hand.

Keeping my eyes on him I leaned back against the tree neatly and took a bite of the fruit. It was sweet, as it should be, for the season was perfect for apples. Warm sunlight washed against my face and I felt like basking. Nearby my mare was cropping at grass and behind me the son of Lord Garry was absolutely swooning over me. Nothing could possibly be better.

Suddenly I looked up at the sound of hoof beats and a man dressed in the livery of my family quickly dismounted from a horse- one I recognized as ours. The man bowed to me and Tom.

"Lady Alexandra, your presence is required by the Lord," he said and then, his eyes properly down, waited for an answer.

"Tell him I'll be there," I answered and daintily pulled myself to me feet, turning to look at Tom, "Would you escort me back to the house?"

"It would be my pleasure," he answered and as the servant spurred his horse back to the house and we moved over to our horses. I took Lady's reins and Tom helped me up into the saddle of the pretty white horse. I patted her neck as Tom mounted up, admiring his grace upon horseback.

We rode back through the orchard in silence, ducking occasionally to avoid a low branch and the only sound around us was that of the birds and our horses' hooves. It was pleasant, but I had a suspicion that what my Father wished to speak to me about wouldn't be. I was already sixteen and unmarried and he had been dropping hints about finding me a Lord at recent dinners. He'd also been dropping hints about nunneries and sending me to school. I shuddered at that thought. Imagine be shuttled off to learn for years and then being expected to work as a nurse or secretary in the Palace all day when one could be out and working one's way to the King's side!

Tom did not leave my side when we reached the house, and in fact insisted on coming inside with me. I made no moves to halt him, and so when I entered my Lord Father's study, it was with Tom by my side. My Father was a tall and imposing man- he kept himself well in shape unlike some higher Lords that let themselves go fat. His hair was black and his eyebrows were thick and bushy and like a hawk. Tom, on the other hand, had the appearance of a schoolboy. He was in fine shape but his hair was fair and golden and hung against his back in a loose ponytail, while his eyes were the lightest blue and sparkled with mischief.

"Alexandra," the Lord said and walked over to me, giving Tom a hard look, but saying nothing about his presence, "I have found someone to marry you to." At those words he gave Tom a pointed look and continued, "In fact, several someones. Your suitors will arrive tomorrow for evaluation. All are wealthy men, young as well, I would not give you to an old man, and all are in high standing. I will take your opinion on them, but your word is not final. Mine is, and it is in your best interest to remember that."

"But sir," Tom put in and we both looked at him in surprise, "Your daughter already has a suitor."

"Excuse me?" my father said slowly and my heart leapt.

"Me," Tom said with a cocky smirk, "I'm courting your daughter. You need none others to come, for I am asking you now for her hand."

"I am afraid you do not have what you are offering," my father said dryly, "I have already spoken to your Father and he does not find Alexandra acceptable for you. I suggest you look elsewhere for a bride."

My eyes widened and Tom's jaw dropped and I turned to stare at Tom. I knew he loved me but I hadn't expected him to ask permission to propose to me now… although I'd expected him to do it eventually but the idea that his father would refuse the marriage was unspeakable!

"Father isn't there something you can do?" I cried out, tears springing to my eyes. I would marry none other than Tom!

"There is nothing," my father said and either it was just me or there was a hint of kindness in his voice.

"Ow," Faolan whispered, but it came out more like, "Aerrr…"

She blinked blue eyes as the room came into focus and then pulled herself shakily onto her four paws, still half lost in the memory that had consumed her. And then she wrinkled her nose in disgust.

To think I was ever such a priss! Faolan thought and snarled under her breath, And Tom! What an ass!

:Faolan: Raul's voice sounded in her head and Faolan looked up and supressed a bout of anger that threatend to rage up inside her chest and she stared at the door, knowing that this time she wasn't here to run around and play.

:I'm here: Faolan snarled up at the Companion, peering up at the horse shaped being with eyes as blue as they were in her human form. She sat down on the bed, peering around the way station with the attitude of an offended teenager, :Just reminiscing about the good life.:

:Hmm:Raul's ears flicked back and forth as she watched her Chosen carefully, clearly surprised at finding a talkative Faolan-wolf.

:As a noble. It wasn't a good life. I was being sarcastic: Faolan drawled as she lay down, resting her head on her paws and resisting the urge to bite Raul's head off. It was her fault she wasn't gallivanting off around the countrysideand enjoying herself. But no… they had to stay inside and she had to 'control' herself. But even as she felt this, this tiny bit of Faolan inside her kept her from attempting to do just that and Faolan hated that about herself. Hated that she had turned into such a goody good as to not want to go gallivanting.

:This is such a pussy way of being a wolf: Faolan commented a few minutes later, digging her claws into the soft bedding beneath her paws.

:Well it's what you'll have to do in Haven: Raul reminded her and Faolan leapt to her feet with a snarl.

:I know that you arrogant horse: Faolan snapped, biting her teeth together with an audible snap and whirling around on the bed before falling down into a lying position once more, :It just sucks.:

With that she closed her eyes and imagined ways that she could terrorize Haven once they arrived, and thought of what the idiotic Heralds would think when they realized that one of their Companions had Chosen a madwoman. Suddenly she felt something brush the hairs on her back and she popped her eyes open to see Raul standing above her. The Companion's nose touched her back once more and then ran down the length of her spine and before she could stop herself Faolan had rolled over and nudged Raul back, playfully, kindly, and most of all without anger.

:What a wimp: Faolan thought of herself as she dozed into an uncomfortable sleep.

Two months later…

"Farewell," Faolan whispered to the Waystation as Raul used her teeth to pull the door shut. The place was dark, and it looked strange that way, for in all the months they'd spent there Raul had always kept a fire going. She'd never cut wood for it, it had burned solely on wind fall.

Then Raul dropped down to lay on her stomach so Faolan could climb up onto the saddle much too big for her. Her things, the bow and extra clothes, were tied to the back of the saddle and the stirrups had been tied up as well- they were much too long for Faolan anyway.

"We're a motley pair," Faolan commented as Raul began to walk steadily down the path from the Waystation to the road.

For the saddle and bridle that hung upon Raul were too big for her, just a little, and Faolan looked like a sparrow perched up on the saddle that swamped her. Her eyes drifted up to the sky, and the stars. The night before had been the last night she'd been forced to change to a wolf, so as to hopefully avoid having to go wolfish in an Inn. They had debated whether or not to stay at Inns, because of Faolan's age, and in the end they decided Waystations were better; there was no one to make explanations to there, but something could happen to force them to make a pit stop at an Inn, and if Fao turned into a wolf that would make things that more complicated.

Last night had been rough, for although Faolan could control herself to an extent now as a wolf, it was quite difficult, and mostly she just bristled with bridled rage whilst laying on the bed in the Waystation. It was, as predicted, difficult to convince her wolf self that attempting to take over the world was not the best thing to do. The strange thing that happened though, as her wolf self became more and more Faolan, was that her Faolan self became more and more wolfish. Not in appearance but in actions. She started liking any non-meat foods less and less and she was often tempted to growl when frustrated. And her emotions as human became harder to control. Raul said that may have been the affect of centuries of different attitudes and ways of dealing conflicting with each other and not just from the change, but Faolan wasn't too sure. She'd became fairly good at ignoring her lives when they'd only complicate things, and relying on Faolan for personality.

:I hate to think of the shame we're doing Heralds just by walking on a public road: Raul commented, her voice amused as the bridle bells chimed.

"When are we going to see people?" Faolan asked at that, her voice holding an anxious note.

:I'm not sure, in a few days probably: Raul said and shook her head, sending the bridle bells into spasms of tinkliness.

Faolan didn't answer but Raul could feel her sitting tensely on the saddle. Her eyes gazed out over the dark woods around them, without any fear of darkness, and she was off in her own world.

:It'll help that we're traveling by night.:

"Maybe we shouldn't- you know, to get used to a diurnal lifestyle," Fao suggested,

:No: Raul disagreed, :It'll lessen the questions about why a young Companion is carting a four year old off to Haven. Not that anyone will ask, but the whole affair would be uncomfortable- and believe me, readjusting your sleep schedule while spending the entire day, or night, riding won't be fun.:

"All right," Fao said with a nod, happy to agree with that.

:What ever did happen to your parents, Faolan: Raul inquired a moment later and the girl tensed more in the saddle, her hands tightening around the reins. Raul, in the silent darkness, could hear her breath quicken, and she wondered if now was the right time to finish the subject up.

"Uh…" Fao said once she was sure Raul expected an answer. However, 'uh' wasn't an answer so she added on, "I don't know what my Pa's doing, and I don't really care. Looking back, he was really a cheap bastard. I didn't understand it before I was bitten, all I knew was I didn't like him much. It makes me angry to think of the way I was manipulated, or could have been manipulated. My Ma was okay, she didn't whip me or anything but she didn't treat me like one of her own. I was their only child and I think I was the only one they figured they'd ever get- there must have been infertility problems and I suppose part of the fuss was with me being a girl. Pa would have wanted a son to help with the farm. A lot I'm inferring from my memories… Raul I knew so little."

:It's all right: Raul said, her quick yet comfortable walk comfortable and as sleep inducing as the rocking of a ship.

"I don't know, Raul… It's so strange to think about them, now that I remember my old lives, I mean, they're not the only parents I know anymore, but despite that knowledge I think of them as mine… you know?" Faolan mused, alternatively gazing at Raul and the scenery disappearing around them, "Anyway… I ran away. The night you and the werewolf found me was the first night I was spending outside. I wasn't lost- but you must have known that otherwise you'd have brought me home first instead of carrying me straight off to some Waystation."

:I knew because you told me: Raul said and Faolan started in surprise, :But you were feverish- it's no surprise you don't remember. Once the wolf was dead I asked you were you lived, who your parents where, and you whispered up to me, "Don't take me home, whatever you do, please don't take me home." I remember it very clearly because your voice was so full of pleading, as if it were life you were asking for and not a destination. I didn't try and search for your parents but I've always wondered Faolan. Yet you've never seem inclined to speak about it, nor does it seem to bother you much, yet I wonder… People can keep things deeply buried. Are you sure you're all right:

"Oh," Faolan said and ran a hand through her hair nervously and then nodded quickly, "I'm all right. It doesn't seem so… important, what with you and the wolf and my other lives. I mean, if I didn't have my other lives I think it'd be a lot harder to cope, but I can see things from an outside point of view now and that makes it a lot easier. It hurts, Raul, but nothing life destroying. It hurts that it hurts, but it isn't my life- that's not what matters. I suppose I should talk about it though?"

:You should: Raul said with a nod of her head, the moonlight sparkling over her white mane. It was keeping Faolan awake, despite the repetitive motions and woods around her. It was so unlike the nights when she'd first changed it made Faolan feel like it was a different world. The trees had leaves upon them, and although she couldn't see the green of the leaves in the black and white night world, it was still beautiful. Warm air curled around them and the moon seemed less stark and demanding, it was more playful, more friendly in the summer.

"Well…" Faolan sighed and stared up at the moon, and the rabbit shape inside it, wondering how such a powerful object could be represented by something as innocent as a rabbit, "Again, I wouldn't be able to describe it like this if it weren't for my memories, but my Pa was… an abusive man. And my Ma left. She abandoned me and him, and I felt angry at her back then, but now I see she was wise to do so- I only wish she'd taken me along. After she was gone Pa turned to me to take out his anger on, not that he hadn't already done that before, but just not as drastically. It only took a week before I was off too. I was looking for Ma. I doubt I'll ever see her again, even if I'd run away in summer and hadn't run into you and the werewolf I probably wouldn't have found her."

:Oh Fao…: Raul whispered and her steps faltered as she turned her head to gaze directly back at her Chosen, :I suspected some of that… but that can't possibly be as little to you as you claim it to be.:

"Maybe it isn't," Fao said, her face unreadable but her voice wavering, "I'm not really sure actually. It'll probably hit me once we start interacting with people again. You know- if I didn't have my old lives it'd probably be easier to deal with because by the time I realized what had happened I'd be so old I would barely be able to remember either of them."

:Faolan: Raul said and Fao glanced up at the filly's ears, :I love you, you know that:

"I know," Faolan whispered and leaned down around the saddle horn to hug the Companion's neck, pressing her face into her silky mane.