Lol to 1bffwltgs and sniffles with her and Chay2193; I like Charlie, too, and it's sad for me to write this but it's required for Nessie's concept of death. =( Poor Charlie. And Edward's just being the over protective father, as if reading thoughts isn't intrusive enough ~rolls eyes~. I am so so SO glad my Dad can't read minds. Anyway… I would say enjoy but this is kind of a sadish chapter.
9) Flickers
Ever since Mom told me about Grandpa Charlie three long almost distant weeks ago, I spent most my time wandering wherever my feet would lead and flicking through all the memories I had of Grandpa.
"Come here you little munchkin!" he yelled when I had soaked him with sea water and sand when we were visiting Jake and Papa Billy one day.
I remember giggling and squealing when he chased me and caught me in his arms by pure luck. I squirmed and wriggled and squealed and giggled when he carried me to the water and jumped into an on coming wave with me.
"Grandpa Charlie!" I had exclaimed when we resurfaced. Grandpa had grinned at me so I flicked water in his face and giggled again before he dropped us under another wave.
"I'll get a cold," I told him when we re-emerged for the second time.
"You don't get colds," he retorted.
"I could; you never know," I said to him with a cheeky little grin on my face.
He had rolled his eyes at me and walked us out of the water. Depositing me on the ground with a kiss, I then took of squealing for Jake.
"JACOB! I WENT FOR A SWIM! DID YOU SEE ME?" I stopped abruptly in front of Jake who was resting on the ground with a huge smile on his face.
"Yeah, honey, I saw you," he reached out for me so I jumped in his arms and watched Grandpa trek through the last few meters of sand.
"Grandpa that was fun, can we do it again one day?" I asked him.
"Sure kiddo, one day," he replied with a salty kiss on my cheek.
I giggled and squealed, "Grandpa Charlie! That's yucky!"
He chuckled at me and pulled me from Jacob's arms for a hug. "Sorry kiddo. Do you still love me?"
"Always, Grandpa. Forever and always," I gave him a kiss on the cheek as he sat down and cradled me in his lap where I soon drifted of to the melody of his heart.
I stopped at the crest of the cliff and stared out over the endless blue horizon. Biting my lip, I surveyed the ground and perched myself a few feet from the edge, resting my head in my hands and staring at everything around me from the tiny dirt particles to the varied blues of the ocean and the soft fluffy clouds that randomly dotted the sky.
Without acceptance, tears started to fall from my eyes and I wrapped my body in tight as an attempt to stall them. I knew I was fighting fate so I succumbed and let them fall to the ground around me. Little sobs escaped here and there and I pressed my hands to my temples to keep my head from exploding.
I heard a muffled sniffing noise and a warm nose poke into my forehead. I looked up and saw a small gray wolf sitting on their haunches in front of me with her head tilted to the side.
I swiped at my eyes and shook my head at the wolf. "Go away. Leah. I don't… I don't know what to do right now but I don't need any witnesses to my breakdown, not even Jacob. Please, leave me alone."
She got up and trotted off and I regretted telling her to leave almost immediately; I felt so abandoned, so lonely.
This brought on yet another round of tears and I collapsed to the ground, hugging my stomach and burying my face in the soft grass my head landed in.
Familiar warm arms and a recognizable yet unfamiliar scent surrounded me when Leah picked me up and settled me in her lap.
"What's wrong, darling?" Leah's kind voice sent a wave or warmth and comfort through me.
Though I never really knew Leah and she didn't exactly like "bloodsuckers", she had always been politely civil to me. This nurturing maternal side to her though, I don't quite know where it came from but I didn't mind it.
"Grandpa Charlie's… he's sick, and he's not getting better," I mumbled through my tears.
"There, there. Shhh," she wiped my tears from my cheeks and rocked us gently.
I was grateful she never said anything but just sat there to comfort me, it took a lot less time to dry my tears.
"Leah…"
"Yeah, sweetie?"
"Thank you. For sitting here with me, I never would have asked because I know how you don't like me and all and… just… thanks."
Top my surprise she laughed but I was too exhausted to lift my head from her shoulder.
"Nessie, I don't hate you. I actually truly do like you, but most of the time you're with your family or around Jake. Just so you know too, I don't hate your family, they just smell really bad to me," she chuckled and I giggled a little with her.
We sat in silence for a few more minutes, not saying anything but just sitting there. Leah started fiddling with my hair and crafted it back into a lose ponytail before securing it there with a rubber hair tie and letting my long curls cascade over my shoulders.
"Do you want to talk about it? Or are you still sorting it out in your mind?" Leah asked softly.
"I'm still sorting things out," I answered truthfully. "I don't mean to sound rude, Leah, but I just want to be on my own for a little while longer now I've calmed down."
"Sure, Nessie. If you need anything at all, I wont be far; just call for me, okay?" she asked as she shifted me from her lap and knelt in front of me, holding both my hands in hers.
I nodded a reply and whispered thanks again.
"Anytime, Ness. Whether you feel like it or not, you're part of our tribe and our pack. We all love you Nessie, and we are all here for you, believe that," she whispered as she drew me in for a quick embrace.
I nodded again and hugged Leah back, feeling a swell of love and warmth and compassion and gratitude rise up for Leah.
Leah ran her hand through my hair as she walked off and phased, sticking her wolf head out of the forest to nod and blend back in with the forest shadows.
"Thank you Leah, I'll be fine, I promise," I whispered into the wind. I heard a little huff back at me and faint paw thuds on the forest floor as she ran back to her patrol course.
I stared down at the swan charm adorning my bracelet. It was beautiful, silver with fire agate wings and eyes.
"Renesmee, darling, close your eyes," Grandpa had asked.
"Is it a surprise?" I openly wondered.
Grandpa laughed good naturedly and nodded, "Sure is, but you have to close your eyes to get it."
So I did; I closed my eyes and let big smile paint its way across my lips.
"Can I look, Grandpa? Can I?"
"Sure you can, kiddo," he eyes were dancing and his face held a smiled that looked as equally huge as mine felt and I gasped when he gave me my bracelet back.
I held the new addition tenderly between my fingers and admired the simple daintiness of it.
"Grandpa, it's so pretty," I cried with a squeal.
"So do you like it?" Grandpa Charlie asked me as he crouched to look me in the eyes.
"Grandpa, I love it! I'll love it forever and ever, just like you. Every time I look at it, I'll remember you, Grandpa, I swear! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you."
"You're welcome, kiddo," he said. "I love you, too. Forever and ever, just like you said," he smiled at me.
"Forever and ever," I promised when I kissed him on the cheek and hugged him.
"Forever and ever, Grandpa. No matter what, forever and ever," I whispered to my swan.
After another ten minutes I forced my legs to stand and dusted my jeans off, straightened my top and jogged into the forest to run home.
The run took longer than normal for me due to my exhaustion from crying, but I soon made it to the porch and leapt lightly onto it. I dawdled and took my time the three steps it took to get to the door and open it.
"NESSIE!" Aunt Rose and Uncle Jasper appeared half a second later looking panicked and worried. "Where have you been?"
"I was out for a—" I pointed to the door and in the general direction of First Beach as I heard Jacob's voice snap back at Aunt Rose.
"She wasn't feeling good so she walked it off. Leave her alone, Rosalie" Jacob growled before he stepped through the door and wrapped me in his arms.
"Jacob," I said as I pressed my face into his warm bare chest.
"Are you feeling better, honey?"
"Yeah. What's going on?" I asked when I finally processed the flurry everyone was in.
"Nessie, your Grandpa's been taken to hospital; he had a stroke," he explained to me as he held onto my waist in case my knees gave way.
"Jacob…" I stared at him, unclear. "Jacob, I need to go. I need to see him."
"Are you up for it, honey?"
"Jacob, please. Just take me," I half begged, half cried.
"Okay, come on," he secured an arm around my waist and walked us to his car, helping me in and closing the door before getting in and starting the engine.
He drove slightly faster than he ever had before and said nothing to me, he only held my hand as he drove and kissed it a few times.
When we got to the hospital, Jacob asked for the room Grandpa was being kept in while I stared around at all the patients and resisted the urge to screw my nose up at the 'hospital smell'.
"Room seventy-three on the west side of this floor," the receptionist pointed Jacob in the direction so he thanked her and started walking, leading me along by our linked hands.
He stopped outside room seventy three and looked at me. All I did was look at the number and nod. He pushed the door open and guided me through it.
The first thing I was greeted with was my mother, holding a partially concealed gray hand in both of her pale white hands and resting her head against Grandpa's blanketed stomach. Although I knew she never slept, Mom had her eyes closed and looked as if she were in some troubled nightmare. For once, my Mom looked so young, and so human.
When I saw Grandpa Charlie's face I understood why. It was hard not to have a human reaction to his appearance, I even heard Jake draw in a quick sharp breath.
Grandpa's skin was gray, and looked so brittle I didn't want to step within feet of him. His bones were becoming more dominant under his gray skin and his face looked hollow. His lips were chapped and looked as if they would break under the weak smile he was giving me now.
I smiled back sensitively at him as I forced my eyes to look into his. I felt like crying again.
His eyes, always so chocolate and warming and beautiful, were haunted. Desolate. These were the eyes of death.