*Katsuki*

"What are you-?" Katsuki's eyes immediately tried to gather information by flicking around the room. He shut the door with his heel and placed his loafers beside Izuku's, let the six-pack of cider sit at his feet, and his eyes found his luggage around the room and he connected the dots.

Did he leave Shouto?

Katsuki looked at Izuku to confirm this, but Izuku turned away, returning his attention to the TV.

"I-" Izuku's voice cracked. When he spoke again, it sounded pained, like it was difficult to get the words out. "Shouto and I broke up."

Katsuki felt like the floor was pulled from under him. He stared at the back of Izuku's head and remained unmoving, processing the information. They broke up. Was it me? Did I do something. Fuck.

Katsuki felt like he was the last person Izuku would want to see. He reached out to Kiri for fuck's sake, to stay with him . He didn't say anything to him. No text in the middle of the night like all his other moments.

They broke up last night after Izuku spent the evening with him. They'd been drinking together, and Katsuki kept him out on weekends. He felt panic rise in his chest. Izuku would hate him.

Then he spent the night with Aizawa pretending he was Izuku. Guilt washed through him and churned his stomach.

"I should go-". He reached for his loafers, preparing to leave.

"No-"

Katsuki paused mid-bend. Izuku wanted him to stay? He pushed his loafers back next to Izuku's ridiculously loud sneakers. Considered drinking the cider, thought better of it, then stuffed it in the fridge.

Panic bounced around inside him, expecting Izuku to yell at him. To blame him. Anything. He swallowed, took a deep breath, then walked around the couch and sat beside Izuku.

Thank fuck the couch was wide because he had forgotten momentarily how squishy it was, and the way he dropped moved Izuku even though he was a whole space away.

He remembered he came to play games so he reached for the controller beneath the coffee table. Katsuki heard Izuku give a tiny oh! of surprise and felt the heat if his gaze but kept his eyes to the TV, some stupid reality show with too loud and too rude people.

He swallowed, the air felt thick and too hard to breathe. Any moment now, Izuku would explode. Berate him. Scream at him. Blame him. He had every right.

Nothing happened and Katsuki saw the Xbox beside the TV.

"Can I play?" Katsuki lifted his fingers, unable to do anything else. He clenched his jaw, waiting for Izuku to say something. Anything. He couldn't look at him. He ruined his life again. He was still ruining Izuku's life.

"Yes, please." It was quiet. Tentative. Like if Izuku was scared of him. Katsuki grunted, afraid to hurt him again.

"I should-"

"Stay." Katsuki said before he knew what Izuku was about to say. He could have been saying he should use the bathroom. Or get water. His voice hurt, reminding him of breathing in too cold air in the middle of winter. He tried not to think of last night, and Aizawa who was responsible for his abused throat, and the things he had imagined about Izuku. He hoped his voice wasn't too forceful or angry.

He felt the cushions shift and Izuku sunk into the squishy surface of the couch and relief eased the panic inside him. Just a little.

The game finally loaded, thankfully there weren't any stupid updates, and he logged on, chose a character without changing the weapon set and started shooting blindly.

He couldn't hear his teammates. Gunfire from the TV wasn't the same as in a headset because he couldn't tell where it came from. He kept dying more than not and it ticked him off. Not enough that he would slip that headset on and disrespect Izuku by appearing to put up that sound barrier between them.

If Izuku was going to be angry, he deserved to hear it. He relaxed a bit into the game as his mind zoned into it, and eventually he felt himself getting angry, but he managed to keep his angry yelling to deep grunts and muffled groans. Or sucking his teeth when he thought of swearing. And gripped the controller whenever he felt like he needed to hit something.

Izuku sat in silence, probably watching the game. Katsuki didn't feel his eyes on him and he was too afraid to look up and find out.

Finally, after watching his character die for the billionth time, and with Izuku sitting stock still, curled in the corner of the couch with his torso facing him but his face to the TV, Katsuki needed to know. If Izuku was mad, or at least if he was the reason.

The screen cut to Katsuki's opponent and he looked at Izuku.

"Why?" Katsuki held his eyes with his own. He softened his gaze. Unforrowed his eyebrows and actively tried not to be combative. He attempted to look curious. Izuku studied him for a moment, deciphering him.

"Why what?" Izuku's face pinkened when Katsuki didn't blink or look away, even as ridiculous bombs sounded from the TV and his character dramatically died again. Katsuki rolled his eyes at the sound, and at Izuku's daftness then decided he would face him, so he twisted his body onto the couch to look at him.

"Why'd you break up, shithead." Panic rose at his slip of tongue, insulting was second nature to him. But he said it in a soft tone, because he was trying to be gentle.

Relief flooded through him when Izuku gave a shy grin.

"Do you want the long version, or the short version?" Izuku's freckled cheeks rounded as he laughed lightly.

He isn't angry? He's laughing? Izuku was laughing at him because he called him shit head. Shouldn't he be yelling at him, throwing fists or words or rocks to hurt Katsuki the way Katsuki had hurt him?

And there it was. Izuku's smile broke. Sadness mingled with the passing joy before overtaking it. Izuku's eyes flitted away from Katsuki's face and landed on his neck. His skin throbbed dully, reminding him of last night.

Telling Izuku to go, just so he could get a lay. He touched his neck, rubbing it to rid the pain.

Aizawa flashed through his mind from the night before. His beard tickled his skin and his mouth worked on his neck, wet and warm. And it was a mixture of him and Izuku, which somehow Katsuki had convinced himself was all he could have.

This twisted fantasy sex with Aizawa, imagining Izuku and getting lost in it. It wasn't, and he needed to accept that.

"Kacchan?" Izuku's voice snapped him back to the present. Katsuki's vision refocused and Izuku's face sharpened, visions from last night faded. He smiled, he felt it. The corners of his mouth lifted just a little. It was nice having Izuku around. To come back to, from his dark places.

So he needed to ask. Finally.

"Was it because of me?" Katsuki's voice still hurt and it sounded gravelly. Izuku's face did something weird, like a wince. It was because of me. But he'd never say that. Why?

"It-" Izuku's voice faltered and Katsuki waited patiently for him to try again. He looked at Katsuki and kept his voice even. "It's complicated. Short version, we don't trust each other anymore."

Katsuki's insides went cold. It felt like he was kicked. He forced himself to react and all he could manage was a slow nod.

When his body finally worked again, he automatically turned back to the TV and rejoined a game, getting rid of the 'you were kicked due to inactivity' notice.

Then his body turned to jello and he sank into the couch, sliding forward and leaning back, trying to get comfortable. To feel comfortable.

He should leave. Izuku didn't want him here. He probably just felt bad that he was in a space Katsuki was used to occupying and he'd never ask him to leave him alone because Kiri was his friend first. That's how Izuku thought anyway. So good, and kind all the fucking time.

Maybe there was a chance he didn't hate him.

Who was Katsuki kidding. Katsuki was responsible for ruining Izuku's childhood, now his long term relationship. Izuku was smitten with Shouto when he had first seen them together. Running the studio like the happiest fucking couple in the world.

His forehead started hurting from the intensity of his frown. He was getting a headache.

Izuku was staring at him. Warmth had bloomed on his face when he realised this and he kept his focus on the screen not really paying attention to killing or being killed.

"Are you seeing someone?"

Katsuki's blood pounded in his ears. Uneven and scattered. He looked over at Izuku and found him unabashedly staring, his eyes opened in surprise.

"It's complicated." Katsuki thought about the things he would let Aizawa do to him. The things Aizawa encouraged him to imagine and a twinge of embarrassment ebbed at him. Then he thought about Izuku's relationship just ending and couldn't bear to say anything other than Izuku's own words. Because it was complicated.

Katsuki met his eyes without flinching and his character died again with a dramatic yell of pain.

Izuku shifted his legs, breaking their connection, then straightened his body toward the TV. His heels barely made it to the coffee table before Katsuki found himself patting the couch between them.

Izuku looked exhausted. He must be. The bags under his eyes were red and puffy, probably from crying the rivers he was used to.

Izuku looked up, startled by the sound and found Katsuki's hand where he had left it. He looked up at Katsuki expectedly and Katsuki repeated the motion. Then, before he scared Izuku from extending his legs toward him like he wanted him to, he turned back to the game he really wasn't paying attention to.

"You can put your legs up if you want." Katsuki forced himself not to look at him. Izuku shifted, but hesitated. So Katsuki encouraged him further. Logic, logic would make him comfortable. Right? "You were facin' over here, I mean. Your body was just used to this direction and it's softer." He thought this was stupid, then added, "For your legs."

They were so comfortable with each other in the studio. And now they were both moving gingerly around each other.

Izuku shifted, bringing his legs back to the couch, then he extended them and sighed as he stretched their full length. Katsuki noticed he didn't touch his thighs with the underside of his feet.

That was okay.

Izuku whimpered or something like that, those cute noises he made that he didn't know he made and Katsuki melted a little. He must be so tired, tired of him, of this, of whatever muttering his mind was doing.

His thigh tingled where Izuku's feet almost were. He kind of wanted him to touch him, he wanted that reassuring contact. They were fine or not. Izuku was angry, or not. He probably wasn't, Katsuki decided. Because he was Izuku.

Eventually as Katsuki was able to disappear into the game, he felt Izuku's feet gradually slip toward him as Izuku sank into the couch, sleep tugging at his eyelids.

This was okay too.

Katsuki smiled a little. Izuku needed to get comfortable. Reluctantly, he glanced at him then cleared his throat a little.

"Hey nerd. Did'ya sleep last night?" Katsuki tried to be soft, but Izuku jumped awake. Cute. His green eyes lit up and he smiled sleepily.

"Mmm… not really, Kacchan." Izuku shifted, realising his feet were on Katsuki but Katsuki reflexively grasped his ankle, shocking himself. Izuku stopped trying to pull himself up.

"Put your head down. I'm not goin' anywhere." Katsuki released his grip and his palm pulsed from touching him. Finally, Izuku melted into the couch and his feet found their way onto his lap. Katsuki glanced at him and his eyes were closed, a small smile across his tired face.

It wasn't long before Izuku was making tiny snores as he fell into a comfortable sleep.