Episode 11: S.I. 2

"8000 B.C. in some town"

::Nostradamus pulled up at some lady's house in his Mercedes Benz in the middle of nowhere::
::He put on his long, black hat and robe::

Nostradamus: I can't believe they fired me from my Astronomy Job! I hate doing these fucking Magic Tricks! I better not screw this magic trick up... or im finished.

::He knocked at the door::
::A woman answered::

Woman: Oh! The Magic Man! My son has been expected you! Please, come in. This is gonna be his best Birthday Party ever!

::Nostradamus walked in and was greeted by many little children::
::He stood in front of them to preform his first trick::
::He took off his hat and pulled out a wand from his robe::
::He waved the wand over the hat::

Nostradamus: Please magic work this trick! Make a rabbit appear and make it appear quick!

::He pulled out a bag of weed from his hat::

Nostradamus: Fuck! I thought I kept this shit in the car!

::Suddenly the kids turned shocked, then they started crying::

Nostrodamus: NO! Please don't do that! I ummm...

::He put on a red nose and squeezed it, making it squeek::
::The woman got mad and sweeped him out with a broom::

Nostrodamus: GODDAMNIT! That's like the twentieth place I've been kicked out of! Im sick of this shit! I need to do something where I can get repect! I need to invent something! YES! Invent something! So I can show the world that im king! I need WITNESSES! Witnesses that can witness the power of my INVENTIONS! I know just what witnesses to get!

"Nostradamus's Laboratory"

::Nostradamus took out some cows, sheep, and chickens from his camper and put them in the laboratory::

Nostrodamus: Commence with me furry friends! WE SHALL CREATE SOMETHING BEYOND PEOPLES IMAGINATIONS, AND WE WILL DO IT TOGETHER!

::The cows went "MOO"::

"Later"

::After hours of sitting in a dark room with a single lamp on... he decided on what to do::

Nostradamus: I GOT IT! I WILL GO THROUGH TIME!!! YES! IT WOULD WORK, AND IT WOULD WORK BRILLIANTLY!

::He set up a long clock, about double the size of him, at the end of a long hallway::
::He strapped on his Knee Pads, a helmet, and some gloves and stood at the other end of the hallway::

Nostradamus:(Lifting his arms into the air) Watch upon me my furry creatures as I run through this clock and appear 1000 years INTO THE FUTURE!!!

The chickens shook their heads::
::He began to run, smiling brightly and screaming, lifting his arms high::
::The went through the clock and came out on the other side::
::He appeared in another room::

Nostrodamus: YES! I have succeeded! I am now 1000 years into the future!

::The animals came up behind him::

Chicken: Actually... your in the other room... dumbass.

"The Next Day"

::Nostradamus stood in a pool of water with only his underwear on::

Nostradamus: Gather around my friends! Watch me as I run electricity through my body and aquire X-Ray Vision!

::Suddenly Thomas Edison walked into the room and stood up to the pool::

Thomas: Dude... electricty hasn't even been invented yet. Believe me man, I know.
Nostradamus:(Stumped) Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight... well! So?!??! Cars haven't either??!?! But they were still at the beggining of this story!!!! SO FUCK YOU!!! Get the fuck out before I take out my AK-47 and blow your ass away! You probably think guns haven't been invented either! You'd be wrong! Mawuahahaha!
Thomas: Hahahaha... bring it bitch!

::Thomas took out a Electrical Cord, plugged it into the wall and threw it in the pool, shocking Nostradamus::

"Year 1980 A.D."
"Hazuki Residence Yard"

::Fuku and Ryo played soccer::

Fuku-san:(Laughing) Hehehe.. Ryo-san! Think you'll be able to dodge this one!
Ryo-san: I don't have to dodge! Im so good, that my body will do it for me without me doing anything!
Fuku-san: Hehehehe, better hope so man!

::Fuku was about to kick, then he spotted a glymspe of Hitori-san... a girl he's been wanting to bone since age 5::
::He got distracted and missed the ball, falling on the ground and into mud::
::Hitori-san chuckled softly::
::Fuku was only 11... and was already into girls::
::He stood up, his pants dark brown::

Hitori-san: Hehehehe... your cute when your dirty.
Fuku-san:(Blushing and feeling his hair) Ummm.. hehe... n-not really.
Ryo-san: Talk to her Fuku-san!
Fuku-san: I AM RYO-SAN! SHUT UP!

::She walked up to Fuku and grabbed his balls::

Hitori-san: I know you wanna fuck me. Well, here I am. So let's go.

::Fuku froze solid::

Fuku-san: Ummmm... ok!!! I think Ine-san keeps condoms in her room for all her boyfriends! Lemme go see if I can find some!
Hitori-san: Hehehe... ok.

::Fuku flicked Ryo off and laughed as he ran inside::

Ryo-san:(Crossing his arms and very jealous) Bitch...

"Ine-san's Room"

::Little Fuku fled in and looked under Ine-san's bed::
::He pulled out a black box and opened it::
::He pushed aside toothbrushes, some vibrators, pieces of gold paper, and some perfume::
::Then he found two comdoms::

Fuku-san: FUCK YES!

::Suddenly Nostradamus popped out of the closet, wearing one of Ine-san's pink braws::

Nostradamus: Uhhhhh... hello?
Fuku-san: AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nostradamus: NO! DON'T SCREAM!

::Nostradamus heard Ryo running into the house::

Ryo-san(From far away) What is it Fuku-san??!?!? Did you see Ine-san without her make-up on?!?!

::Nostradamus got scared and ran into Ine-san's bathroom, splashed some water on Fuku and shocked them both::

"In a dark place"

::Suddenly Fuku and Nostradamus ended up in a dark area, where they couldn't see much of anything except for a crack of light, which revieled a elegant, golden bathroom which smelt like an Elephant's Ass Crack::

Fuku-san: Where am I?
Nostradamus: I don't know. But I've already visited Year 3000. It appears that everytime I shock myself, I dissapear and go to some Time Zone. It's very bizzare.
Fuku-san: So we're in a different Time Zone??!?! NOOO! I gotta get back! I have to get laid! You don't understand!
Nostradamus: Have patience young one... we will get you back momentarily. Im just afraid of being yelled at. I get yelled at ALL the time. So I flipped out. Sorry. Once we find water, I will take you back. OK? You should of been seen when I took someone from the Stone Age to see the Apocalyspe in year 4532 A.D. They flipped out like crazy! HAHAHAHA!
Fuku-san: Looks like we're in a closet. We should go out and find water...
Nostradamus: Good idea little one.

::Suddenly a man walked into the bathroom wearing a Nazi German Suit::

Fuku-san:(Whispering) Oh my God.
Nostradamus: What?
Fuku-san: That's Adolph Hitler.
Nostradamus: Who's he?
Fuku-san: What time did you come from?
Nostradamus: Ummm... sometime before this dude got hung on this cross. Then they changed it to YEAR 1. So im assuming sometime before that. Hey... I went to that cross thing. These guards nailed this dude to a cross and he ressurected. It was an awesome day. I shook the dudes hand and got his autograph. Then he said I was saved and I'd get holy pleasure from him when I died. Whatever that means.
Fuku-san: Shhh... quiet man. I think he's gonna do something.

::Adolph Hitlar sat on a toilet and began taking a massive shit, farting and lifting his legs off the ground::

Adolph: Oh mi Gid! This shit is holdin' strong!

::Fuku and Nostradamus wrinkled their noises and held them as Adolph moaned in pleasure::
::Alolph put his pants back and and pulled a couple of grenades out from the toilet::

Hitler: SHIT! Why do those filthy americans kip shoven grenades ip my ass!

::He went to the mirror and stripped down his clothes, revieling his 1.5, string thick dick::
::He put on a purple braw and a womans wig::
::He posed in front of the mirror::

Hitler:(Woman's voice) Hello... Mrs. Robinson. How do you like to be spanked?

::Then he screamed suddenly like a little girl::

Hitler: Hehehee... (Shaking his finger) Nit too hard I hope... hahaha!

::The he put on little tight, black underwear and took out some pink and gold Pong Pongs, dancing up and down with them::

Hitler: IM A PRETTY LADY!!!!

::Suddenly Fuku and Nostradamus started bursting out laughing::
::Hitler got startled and took out a Hair Dryer, holding it like a gun::

Hitler: WHO'S IN THERE?!?!?!? YOUR UNDER GERMAN ARREST!

::Guards stormed into the bathroom::

Guards: Sir! What's wrong??!?!

::Hitler grabs a towel and wraps it around him::

Hitler: Iver heard of knicking??!?!!

::The guards find the two in the closet and arrest them::
::They are taken in front of hitler::

Hitler: Hmmm... take the tall one in the other room and muster the Nazi Soldiers together to rape him. Have yourselves a nice gang bang.
Nostradamus: WAIT! WHAT?!??! NOOO!!! NOOOOO!!!

::The guards take him away::

Fuku-san: Nice knowing you man!
Nostradamus: HELP ME YOUNG ONE!!! HELP!!!! They're gonna take advantage of my sweet, sensitive BODY!!!! NOOOO!!!
Hitler: And as for you, little boy.

::Fuku gulped::

Hitler:(Smirking) Your coming in my room with me!

"Hitler's Room"

::Fuku was thrown on the bed::

Fuku-san: Hey dude! Im just a little kid! Why dontcha just kill me man! I thought you were evil!

::Hitler blocked the door, licking his lips and winking at Fuku-san::

Hitler: That was just my cover up. Im fiscious out in the battlefield... but once I get in here, it's to the bedroom with a bottle of lotion and some whips for me!
Fuku-san: Please! Don't rape me! Im too young to be raped!
Hitler: Your never to young to be raped little kid.

::Hitler roled up his poster on the wall of Franklin Rosevelt in an Army Thong and tanktop and revieled a switch::
::He switched it and Disco Lights came on::
::Fuku ran for the door::
::Hitler took out a long, flexible black whip and whipped his feet::

Fuku-san: OW!!! GODDAMNIT!!!
Hitler: Your a naughty boy! Need to have a little floggy whoggy!

::Hitler bends Fuku over his bed and rapes him::
::Fuku screams for a while... then gets a smile, and starts to enjoy it::

Hitler: It's relaxing isn't it. All those boys that are taken to those Prison Camps like Ravenclaw. They really don't go there, they go to my palace where I give them sentual pleasure!
Fuku-san: Mmmmm... this feels so good my Hitler Bitch!
Hitler: OH BABY! I told you so!!!

::Fuku never had interest in girls anymore after that sweet, passionate night of sex with Hitler::
::He found his way back home, and was never right again::