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The following is a fan-based
FICTION
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Chapter 30: Memories of Old, Traumas of New
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Emilia was not sure what to expect out of the trials, but she was quite sure that when she was told that they would face their pasts, this was nowhere in her mind.
One moment she was stepping through the gates with Subaru, the next one she faced darkness and unconsciousness. Panic surged mostly on the fact she couldn't feel Subaru's hands squeezing her and she couldn't feel Puck cheering her up in that moment of personal despair.
But from Darkness came... warmth. She slowly stirred awake, eyes blurry as she felt the drowsiness fight back against her wish to wake up from this... nice bed. It was not the kind of bed she was accustomed to as it was without a proper mattress and set close to the ground.
She finally opened her eyes, breaking through the blurriness as she was rewarded with... definitely not her room at the manor. And not in the right outfit and body as she was clearly... smaller. Very small. Roughly the same age as Petra and... why are those clothes familiar?
Before Emilia had the means to properly regain control of her bearings, her attention was stolen by a soft knock on the door, with the door opening and... a kind-looking woman with brown hair and eyes- but it was the eyes that stole her full breath.
Those were... Subaru's eyes!
"Oh, you are awake. I am glad," The lady mumbled happily. "Hello there, how are you?"
"F-Fine."
She was so nice-looking! Even with those intense eyes she was so soft and so warm. She even ignored her ears, which would be sign of distrust and just reached for her forehead to check her temperature.
"The fever is gone, but it would be best you don't put too much strain on yourself. Okay, sweetie?"
"Yes."
"Now... I think your name is... Emilia, right? Subaru was quite chatty about you. A pity he left to buy some candy but... you can join us by the living room."
Subaru? Where is he?! If he is here, then why didn't he wait for her?
As the half-elf contemplated this, she slowly came to realize this was not... real. As the woman held her hand to slip out of the bed and follow her to the living room. It was a spacious house despite lacking that many windows, and she was soon greeted by the sight of a man with his muscular upper body exposed while doing some exercises.
He is so muscular!
Despite her diminished size, Emilia's mind was capable of still reacting before the sight of a man that knew how to train. And this man was actually her man's father! He had Subaru's hairstyle and color- even the face was her beloved lover's. Which meant that he had the right blood to ultimately make himself as powerful as that!
I just need to push him the right way and he will handle us better with those good muscles~.
"Kenichi-kun, what did I tell you about dropping your chores for exercises~?"
"That the couch is quite nice for a disobedient husband such as yours," He replied with a smile, yet Emilia could taste the grimace building up behind that fake smirk. "And I see that our little guest is awake. Hello, little lady."
"H-Hi."
I am whipping Subaru in that shape. I will have Rem and Ram to help me. Heck, I will ask Felt too if she doesn't touch him too much.
They all sat by the table and Naoko offered her a few slices of appa or... apple?
"This is good," She ultimately judged, causing the woman to giggle at that silly comment.
"I am glad to hear that. The shops around can be quite cheap about some of their products, but this one I think I got right."
A slow nod came from Emilia.
"Say, Emilia, is it true that you are close to our Subaru, how is he around new friends?"
A bit on the nose, but Emilia offered a pretty smile and took this situation as her test... to ask his hand from his parents.
"He is friendly and quite caring. He gave me hope when I needed it, so I love him a lot."
"Ah, I can tell," Naoko reassured, her smile now strained. "Subaru-kun is... a good child. He is just unsure of what he has to do. He wants to please many, there was a time he even went as far as copying my dumb husband with some mannerisms but... He is still our child. He is still our son. And he needs so much love at times that it seems like we are spoiling him rotten."
"But he needs it," Emilia confessed honestly, understanding what the real topic was all about. "He is not honest if not pushed into being that."
"He is a stubborn kid with a good heart. At times it's a very nice thing but-"
"He is also dumb. Like your husband," The half-elf finished herself, her pretty smile matching the mother's own while they both ignored the whiny 'hey' from Kenichi.
"Now, Emilia, I know this may sound easy for you to say and I know you may not think much of it. But I want you to keep by his side at all costs now that he is not around us- we can't watch over him, but you can."
...Wait, what?
"Y-you know-"
"We may be construct of his mind, but we were given brief life. A mirage of the true Naoko and Kenichi but... we still love him. Our Subaru. Hold him dear to your heart and never let him despair. Be his shelter and guide, because I know, despite your own struggles, that you care for him quite dearly."
She felt her world shake as she was lifted up and given a hug. Emilia embraced someone she hoped to turn in her mother-in-law in the near future.
"I will always love him!"
And with that proclamation, Emilia's world cracked like grass. In a mere blink of an eye, the half-elf felt like being punched awake, snapping upward as she woke up back in her body and... in a field of flowers. She made it! Did she? Was this the second test?
Her perplexity was met with further confusion when she heard a muffled sob nearby. She glanced at the source of it and then bolted towards it as she recognized the kneeling figure.
"S-Subaru?"
He didn't respond, only sobbing as she gave him a tight hug in an effort to console him. Something about this reaction felt far too genuine to be a trick and she recognized his own smell there. It was him. And he was hurting. What happened? Did he sees her past? Was it that... bad?
But before she could properly ask him that, she found their hug suddenly squeezed up by shadowy and lengthy arms that wrapped around them. For a moment, true terror surged to Emilia as she knew only one individual capable of this and... there was no pain coming for them as a now individual joined the embrace. This one sharing a pale but smooth skin like hers. A slender frame and hair as white as hers. The eyes? Same as hers, and yet the sorrow so deeper than anything she could compute at the moment.
"I am sorry," Satella muttered as she hugged both Emilia and Subaru.
Subaru was not sure of what to feel about this.
It wasn't his past- this much he could understand, but his constant approach to tragedies sure screamed at him that he was stumbling into one. This wasn't even a mere guess, he could feel it in the air as he woke up in a warm bed before the sight of Emilia's only family- Fortuna.
Kind lady, he could see where Emilia's good traits came from despite her not remembering the woman. Tired, lonely but not as she had 'Geuse' to help her. A strong individual when it came to his morals and personality, but quite the slim guy with little to no muscles on his body.
He still put on a fight when that happened. Pandora came, and she took the village in a storm as the small forest was decimated despite the desperate efforts of the protectors. He saw Emilia's friend getting slaughtered, then Pandora tricked Geuse to kill Fortuna before his mind was consumed and... and Subaru was alone in the cold.
But there was no explosion of ice as he realized would have occurred through Emilia. It made sense that the horrid affair would have been what triggered the glacial response against Pandora but... but this was not happening to Subaru. Instead, dark smoke emerged from his body. Polluting and destroying the world around him as the cold stopped mattering- he was just glaring at the source of all this pain and he lashed out at it.
"Why are you hurting her?! Why are they hurting them!?" He snapped, his childish voice cracking as his adultish one briefly took over as more dark mist wrecked their surroundings.
Pandora just stared at him, unflinching and unforgiving. "Why should I tell you? You are not the one that can open that door so I see no point in answering any-"
"...What door?"
The query was not one to mock, but a genuine one, and Pandora paused and then frowned as she realized just that.
"That door."
Subaru couldn't see a door despite Pandora's upsetted tone. No, he could see an opening within reality itself. And one that gave him a different scene. He was suddenly yanked by it as the darkness failed to subdue itself as he watched the truth that he doubted Emilia even remembered.
"She is just a baby! Why does she have to be brought away? You are strong enough to take care of her!" Fortuna's angry voice was met with sorrowful silence. "My family died for this! For her- so she could live. And you want her to be thrown to the wolves?"
...
"I am dying, Fortuna," The old man sitting in front of the standing elf announced, these few words shaking up the lady as her wide eyes betrayed disbelief.
"T-That's not possible. You lived for so long-"
"All because of her love and... pain," The old wizard interjected weakly, holding his chest. "As much as I can prolong this torture for myself to protect others... my flesh is mortal. And my time is now due to come to an end."
"So you are just going to... let her leave before-"
"Before Pandora finds her. If she finds her, Fortuna, things will not go well for us," The elder mumbled before turning to... Subaru. "And now, I think you and I will have a talk."
The boy frowned as he realized that it was just him and the old man now in that dark office.
"W-What? I thought-"
"This is not a memory. More like a memento I left behind on this child's mind before she left my care, and that I hoped for either you or my beloved Satella to find in the eventuality these two girls met."
...
"You are... Flugel?"
"I am," The old magician confirmed, a smile adorning is face. "But I am afraid that we can't do much of a talk due to how limited I am in my functions."
"Wait, what do you mean with-"
"You being the second individual beyond my wife and Witch of Envy that gets access to this?" The elder interrupted mirthfully. "Let's just say that you and her are not so different. After all, you were shaped by Emilia's failed witch factor."
Subaru could only frown as the fragment sighed back at him.
"To make it simple, when I sealed away my wife, I made an effort to try and save her by severing her darkness away in the form of the Witch of Envy. This succeeded but by a far bigger cost than I could have expected due to Echidna's own idiocy on the matter. She is spoiled and arrogant, causing for her own greed to act up when it became clear I was trying to seal away Satella's power elsewhere."
"What- What did she do?"
"She tried to trick Satella into thinking I was trying to fully seal her away. This caused her control over her darkness to slip and cause a major disaster known as the 'Witch Calamity'. I fought with other heroes against the Witch of Envy and ended up sealing her."
Flugel leaned back on his chair. "Time passed, regret and guilt manifested and I survived by sheer personal spite and my connection with my beloved witch. That's when I realized that this endless existence had a limit due to my decision to split Satella and the Witch of Envy apart. Magic thought right to 'create' a new Witch of Envy after enough time had gone by without one around."
"Emilia?"
"Her appearance, her personality and even the first signs of pollution from the abnormal Witch factor she was born with. Another ticking bomb but... one I could work to save this time around. But, in doing so, that ended up leaving me up for expiration," The magician further explained. "I removed her Factor and sent it to the world I came from. The one we came from, Natsuki Subaru."
"You came from Japan?" The young man asked, surprise burning up in his chest. "But- why? Why there?"
"It was safer. There magic is heavily suppressed and the effects of being the 'sane' container of the Envy factor were to be extremely mellowed with the passing of years."
Subaru lowered his gaze as the floor turned into a limpid pool that showed memories of his past. His struggles to relate to others, to make friends with the same ease as many others, the self-loathing that for a while made him unwilling to pursue beyond the path of being a NEET.
Why, no matter how much he put an effort to reconcile with some of the issues he had with his parents... he still felt like he couldn't get them. He couldn't get it. He couldn't just pull away from the pit of despair he tended to hurl himself at and... he felt anger. Anger that Flugel welcomed with a weary but calm look.
"I will not apologize. Not only because I don't believe myself in the wrong, but because I know for a thing it worked as intended- even now, I can confirm this was the best decision. And Satella's choice to bring you here confirms this. She knows you can subvert the natural expectation of magic producing another Witch of Envy. With you here, Subaru, with your own body having controlled the now-tamed and subdued version of Envy in your soul, you will be able to become a stable Warlock of Envy."
Subaru just couldn't speak. Tears before the painful memories continuted to slowly trail down his cheeks as a muted and unforgiving scream from his gaze rebuked any logical response from Flugel. In the end, the old man smiled at him and... he was soon 'alone'.
Everything was numb and unforgiving... and then a pair of warms crashed around him, trying to pull him out of that hole through a warm hug but... that wasn't working. The same wasn't for the feeling of pure love that his body was subjected to. In a brief moment, he felt a heartbeat closer to his own and he felt at... home.
"I am sorry," Satella muttered as she hugged both Emilia and Subaru.
AN
In layman's terms, Satella is Subaru's step-mom by magic. Only by magic. What? You thought that Emilia was the 'relative' here? Oh no, that's your Barusu and, truth be told, this would explain many things on why he is able to adapt so well to some of the witch factor he dabbles with in canon. And to think that Arc 11/12 should be the final one and we have yet to get a legitimate answer on why Satella chose Subaru.
