Warning: Sex scene in beginning

Inoichi worked with me for an hour, going over what I'd left out about my past. I spoke of the stifling environment I was in the past; how I learned to cope with what I had perceived as wrong things I've done. I spoke of how making Kakashi kill me had me wanting to hurt myself for the cruel action against him. How I felt I needed to be punished for how my actions had turned Obito into who he was, and how my actions had affected kakashi. And finally, I talked about how when I learned what my actions had done to Obito, it killed me a little inside to see what I had done to him.

In the end, Inoichi went over some coping techniques I could use in the future. I felt embarrassed that I had zoned out and did that to myself so impulsively, but Inoichi was a pro at what he does and a true veteran. He has seen it all by now, or close to it.

When he was done, he led me back to Kakashi. I knocked on the door hesitantly, but the response from inside was quick. "Yes?" I heard Kakashi question.

I could almost imagine him invested in his book, not even glancing up at the door. It was an almost nostalgic sight now, despite how little time I've been here in the Elemental Nations.

"It's me," I called back and slowly began to pull the door open. When I was able to see Kakashi's face, it was pale, and slack with exhaustion. Regardless of that, he still stared at me intently as I locked eyes from him at my place by the door.

"May I come in?" I asked tentatively.

His response was immediate. "Of course."

I walked through the door and shut it behind me slowly and carefully, meandering towards him in a measured pace. "Kakashi, I…" I approached his bedside, but the words got caught in my throat. I hung my head and clasped my hands together. "I'm so... I'm so–"

"Don't." Kakashi interrupted me sternly. I looked up at him in surprise, and his face, while still pace and weary, was hard. "You're not at fault for what O-Obito decided to do, Rin. You're not at fault for how he treated you, and how he continues to treat you. You're traumatized by your experiences, but you are not at fault."

"But–" I stammered back, trying to collect my thoughts.

"No." The word just as firm as his first. "You've already apologized for committing suicide once, Rin, and admitted you've made mistakes and are learning from them. That's enough for now. You're not responsible for how others react to your actions. You shouldn't have used me to commit suicide, Rin, but how I and others react is up to us, and not you."

I looked away from him uncomfortably. Kakashi wasn't usually one to get sincere, or talk about feelings. This was an unusual behavior for him and I wasn't sure how to react to it. Before I could respond to his words, I felt his rough, calloused hand grab mine and squeeze it in comfort.

As he did so, I felt a tear drip from my eye unbidden. Without releasing my hand, his other reached up to wipe away the wayward tears falling down my face. The moment his hand touched my face so carefully and gently, I could feel my jaw starting to chatter with anxiety, from the force of trying to withhold the intense feelings of sadness.

Before I knew it, I was pulled into Kakashi's bed by the hand holding mine and I was thrown onto him, splaying my body over his.

I made a squeak as he did so, but began to curl closer to him, getting into a comfortable position. His hands started to run down the length of my body, pulling me into him closer, tighter, coming close to spots no one has touched before.

I curled into his chest as his hands wandered, tears soaking his shirt as my head laid against his chest. When one of his hands cupped my butt, I jerked away from the hand in surprise, making a surprised noise as he did so.

He hushed me as one hand came to sit on my head and petted my hair. The other hand on my butt settled just to the side and began to rub and massage my hip and thigh. My tears began to dry up as his ministrations both calmed me and sent my heart racing.

I began to fully relax into his chest as the massage, his warm body and hands brought me into this moment with him. Within minutes, I was like a puddle in his lap, letting him continue his ministrations. When his hand near my hip began to wander closer to my front by my waist, I couldn't help the moan as his hand ghosted above my pelvis.

"Kakashi," I huffed at him in exasperation. "We shouldn't."

His hand slowly moved back to above my pelvis as he asked, "Why?" in a husky voice.

"It's…it's not healthy, Kakashi. You know that."

"Maybe I don't care." He whispered in my ear.

"You should," I retorted without heat.

"Let me make you feel better," He spoke gently in my ear. "Let me help you forget, Rin."

I tiredly shook my head. "It's really not a good idea, Kakashi."

I felt his masked face rest against my neck under my ear, the feel of the fabric moving as he dragged his face from the base of my neck to my ear, pausing against the shell of it. I gasped as I felt a tiny nip on it.

"It isn't?" He asked rhetorically.

I gave a huff of frustration before taking control and turning around and straddling his lap to look him in the eyes.

"What if Obito is watching? Or the Akatsuki's spy?"

Kakashi's face showed nothing, but his eye had a spark in it. "Then give them a show."

I slapped his chest gently and hissed, "Kakashi!" I was surprised by the scandalous suggestion. Before I could say or do anything else, he rolled his hips to meet mine after my scandalous cry. The action immediately had me throwing my head back and eyes rolling back as I felt him rub against my crotch under my skirt. I threw my hands down on both sides of his shoulders to brace myself.

"You don't know what you're asking," I groaned at him. His hips rolled up again and I couldn't hold back the mewl I let out.

"I think I am." He replied roughly.

Thoughts of Obito lingered in the back of my mind, as well as the spy. However, the more the thoughts of them lingered in my mind, the more angry I became of the two. I wanted to chase the pleasure Kakashi had sent me under, but was angry with the blatant stalking, too. With one more roll of his hips and another cry from my lips, I decided: fuck Obito, and fuck Zetsu. I'm going to enjoy this, and if they're watching, they'll get what they deserve.

I reached up and yanked Kakashi's mask down quickly, and he didn't try to stop me. One of his hands placed itself behind my head and another around my waist. Both hands pulled me closer into him and my hands braced against the bed behind him that sat in sitting position crumpled beneath me. They folded behind Kakashi's head as our mouths met.

Kakashi and I fought for dominance with our tongues as our hips began to meet repeatedly. I gasped as each thrust met and he swallowed my cries when he hit a specifically sensitive spot.

My mouth trembled against his as I pulled back a little. "K-Kakashi…" I moaned.

His lips left mine and dropped to the base of my neck and as he thrusted one more time to meet my hips, he bit down at the juncture. Unable to hold back anymore, I screamed as I felt myself climax against him. My body was shaking like a leaf as he held me and I felt him groan against my neck.

As my body started to slowly stop trembling from the extreme high, he released his mouth from my neck and I dropped my head onto his shoulder as I gasped for breath. I felt his head lean into my shoulder as well while we breathed in tandem.

However, I was not ready for what happened next. The hospital door slammed open quickly and I gave a shout of surprise, but Kakashi merely buried his face further into my neck, hiding his face from view.

I turned to whoever interrupted us and felt myself go pale seeing the blushing faces of Kurenai, Asuma, the surprised face of Genma and… Gai's horrified look.

I inhaled deeply and started to wave my arms at them. "No, no, no, it's not what it looks like!" I was stopped by Kakashi who pulled me closer into his chest and I was in no position to stop him.

I heard a chuckle and I turned toward the group again, seeing Genma starting to snicker.

Kurenai began to stutter. "I…I'm so sorry! We thought you were in danger again. We heard about last night, but we didn't expect this. We'll let you be!"

"No!" I shouted desperately, "Wait!" I reached a hand out towards them, Kurenai nearly ran out with Asuma pretending not he was not running from the situation as well. Gai left after giving Kakashi a thumbs up and his patented flashing smile. Genma lingered behind the rest, still snickering to himself.

"Nah," he said slyly around the senbon in his mouth. "I think you two have a lot to talk about."

He shut the door behind him, not even glancing at my embarrassed face once.

Kakashi started to chuckle then as they all left and I lightly swatted his chest again like I had before this all started. "Hey! What are you laughing about? That was so embarrassing!"

He grabbed the hand that I used to hit him and brought the hand up to his mouth and as he spoke, his lips moved over the hand. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about, Rin." I ignored the shudders that wanted to go down my back as I felt his lips ghosting over my palm.

"Maybe for you. I was the one who screamed."

Kakashi hummed quietly in response against my palm.

"It's probably because you have a lot of experience with this, right?" I huffed and pulled my hand away from his grip, crossing my arms under my chest. I leaned back with my knees to sit on my heels that still straddled Kakashi's lap. "That…was my first."

That drew Kakashi away from me and he stared at me with his one eye. I could see the shimmer of a smirk on his lips as he used a hand to pull up his mask. "Was it?" He almost sounded proud.

I grit my teeth, trying to push back the embarrassment I still felt from our show and the irritation of his pride.

Sighing to relieve some tension, I replied, "Yes."

"Mah," He started casually. "I guess we'll just have to make sure it's not your last." I could feel heat start to rise up my neck and into my cheeks.

I shook my head at him and ran a hand through my hair and I started to climb off of him. "Careful," I warned him, "You might actually make me fall for you if you talk like that." The warning was half in joke and half serious. Now that we were separated and I was calm, I felt shame for what we did. We definitely crossed the line again. I liked Kakashi, truly, I did. But I also worried about how he felt if he knew the truth. I also worried I was taking advantage of his own trauma. We were trauma bonding again, and I was struggling to fight against it.

He grabbed my wrist to stop me from walking away completely from his bedside. When I looked up at his face, I was surprised by the serious look on it. His eye almost looked wary, clouded. His next words made my stomach feel like it was tumbling down a flight of stairs.

"Is that a bad thing?" The words were cautious, but serious all the same.

I stared into his eyes for a few moments, considering my answer. "I told you this was a bad idea from the start." I reminded him. "No, it's not a good thing, probably." I said honestly. "I'm sure Inoichi would tell us it's a bad thing."

"Inoichi doesn't need to know." Kakashi said it simply; so easily.

I shook my head. "You may be used to lying to therapists and running away from doctors, but I need to take care of my mental health, Kakashi, and you should, too. He's extended an invite to you to join us, but I doubt you will."

Kakashi's grip on my wrist loosened and he turned away from me, avoiding my eyes. I pulled my wrist from his grip completely and backed up a few steps. I turned around and pulled up my usual chair by his bedside and sat down on it heavily.

"Listen, Kakashi. If we're going to do this, go forward with this relationship, we need to do it in a healthy way. I haven't been back long and we're already at this stage? And every time we've gotten intimate, it's been because of some stressor. That's…not really healthy, Kakashi, and you know it." I kept my voice gentle and soft, considering and inviting.

He turned back to me and looked at me with a considering eye.

"I like you, I really do, Kakashi, and I always have. You know that. We just…need to be careful, go slow and make sure we are bonding in a healthy way. You understand that, right?" My voice was a gentle prodding as I gave him pleading eyes.

"You chose Obito many times over me in the past." He said, and I was taken aback by his petulant words.

My brow furrowed as I stared at him for a few seconds, many words on the tip of my tongue but being carefully swallowed. Finally, I spoke.

"I chose you last night, Kakashi. You know that. Whatever happened in the past, is the past. You think I'll go back to Obito? You're wrong. Even after knowing it was Obito who was holding hostage after all that time, I still ran away from him. When I arrived here in Konoha and he tried to take me back, I only offered to go back because I was scared for you. I know what he's capable of and I didn't want him to hurt you. Whatever I felt for Obito is gone now. Do you not remember me slicing a tendon and breaking his nose last night?"

I was unable to keep the frustration from my tone. I wanted to be gentle with Kakashi, and so far, I have been. However, if he wanted to pursue a relationship, we had to do things right. I was a very willing participant a few minutes ago, but we need to set some boundaries, and he needs to understand that this is more complicated than a normal relationship.

Not only that, but his statement about Obito showed a clear sign he was lingering on the past and his and I's trauma with Obito. Honestly, we'd probably get farther if we could put chakra-binding seals on Obito and forced him into "family therapy" with the two of us, but that wasn't going to happen anytime soon, if at all.

In the time it took for him to respond, I forced my frustration in a box in my mind, locked it and buried it underneath the sand of my mindscape. I'll handle it later when I'm not having a serious conversation with Kakashi who needs understanding, not frustration.

"You're right." He stated simply with a sigh.

I gave him a playful smirk. "Maybe you should listen to me more often. Life would be more fun." I shrugged at him and sent him a wink.

"Or you would rope me into doing some kind of prank with Naruto, getting us all into trouble." His words were accusatory, and I didn't dispute them.

"Perhaps, but wouldn't it spice up life?" I continued in a playful tone.

"Or get us sent to jail."

"I think Jiraiya would bail us out, no big deal." I gave him another shrug as I continued to joke and eyed him slyly.

"You say that like Jiraiya actually has any money left after all his trysts." He stared dead-eyed at me, not willing to play along.

"Of course he does, he's an international bestseller. Is he not? He just likes to mooch off of others." Kakashi gave a long-suffering sigh to my response before replying, "Probably," and leaning back fully into his reclined hospital bed. After a small silence between us, he asked, "hungry?"

I smiled up at him in gratefulness, glad the bad energy and dissipated for now. "Yes."

"How about we escape from here?" He asked.

I eyed him silently, debating before my wanting took over my rational mind. "Yes, please!"

He started to climb out of bed and headed for the shower. He paused on his way to the shower, turning to look me in the eye. He stared for a few seconds and then said, "You should probably come sit on the toilet while I shower and we can talk since you won't be in my line of sight."

I could feel the blush flare up my cheeks again, but realizing he was right, didn't argue and followed him into the bathroom. I plopped down on the toilet as he began to shower and we talked about where we would sneak out to eat at and what else we would do until we were dragged back to the hospital and given the ANBU treatment.