Chapter 7: Family
I sit in the dark, cupping my drink in between my hands, watching. I am silent. I am a shadow. Or am I a ghost?
"Wil, Kaie, hurry!"
"Do we have to?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"'Cause I said so!"
Syra. She was the oldest. The bossiest, too. But she could be gentle, and understanding, and she was a good listener. How could I have ever killed her?
"Holy cow, Kaie, what happened to you!"
"What's it look like? I fell."
"And the boy you were fighting? Did he fall as hard as you, or harder?"
"That's none of your business."
Wil was like an older brother. Annoying, always cracking jokes, always laughing. He always had a way to cheer me up. And he was always looking out for me, no matter how many times I told him I was a big girl and I didn't need anyone to watch my back.
They were the only family I knew, aside from Jeren. We did everything together. Got into trouble together, trained together, argued together. But my master wouldn't allow us to go on missions together. Maybe if they had been there with me when I fell, things wouldn't have turned out the way they did. Maybe they would have been able to keep me from falling.
That's all I can think about now. 'If this had happened, that wouldn't have happened.' Why haven't I decided yet if I'm good or bad? What am I, really? I was good to begin with. Was I ever really bad? I did kill my master. I killed my friends. I killed the Sith that trained me. Some would say killing innocent people makes me evil. But from a Jedi point of view, the Sith wasn't innocent. From a Sith point of view, the Jedi needed to die. What am I to believe now?