Chapter 16: Dream
Curse these dreams and their reoccurrences. They won't even leave me alone when I'm trying to heal. I couldn't bear living this, reliving it is no picnic.
This time I'm in a meadow in a place I've never physically been before. And standing before me are my opponents. But they aren't who they were before, when this had really happened. Before, they had been the enemy, and before, they had not spoken. This time, they were friends, and they were screaming to be heard, pleading with me not to do what I needed to do, what I had done.
Wil's welcome face almost made me cry. It had been so long since I'd last seen him.
Syra's mouth was wide open and moving fast, ordering me to stand down and come home with them.
Jeren stood silently behind the two of them, but his piercing green eyes spoke louder than any words ever could. He had known what was happening, had known that it was inescapable. He was ready. He was willing to let the Force do its work.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, and struck them down, one by one.
"You aren't sorry, Kaie," that hated voice said from behind me. "You did what you had to do."
He was right, and I knew it. Surveying the bodies of my friends and master, I felt a rage boil up inside of me, a burning anger that I could do nothing to suppress. My hand tightened on the hilt of my lightsaber, and I turned to face the Sith. I would fight against him with everything I had, and I would win.
As I wake, I feel the lingering heat of anger slowly rolling away, leaving my mind unclouded, and my breathing heavy. I had done the right thing. In the end, I had done the right thing.
The end had not yet come, Kaie. You are still fighting a battle.
Against what?
Against yourself. Against everything the Sith ever said to you, against what he led you to believe. Against your grief.
But how can I fight those things?
That's something you have to figure out for yourself.