"…and so she volunteered to get out. Honestly. It was her idea." Jack tried to look earnest and truthful and all that good stuff. He doubted it was working. "Seriously. I was going to retire, but she said that I was needed more at the SGC."

Hammond looked at him, with his chin leaning on his hand. Finally he held up a hand to stop Jack's babbling. "Jack. Thank you for the explanation. It was very… long and… detailed. Now it's time for me inform you what the president said to me about this."

Jack felt his future slipping away from him. Ah yes, I can see it now, the voice opined. A nice eight-by-six cell, reserved just for you at Leavenworth.

"President Hayes would like you to know that, though he is disappointed to have lost a very good United States military officer in Samantha Carter, he is glad that you two have found happiness, at long last." The General glanced at his notes. "Also, he would like you to be certain that an IOA investigation is pending if you and Doctor Carter fraternize while off-world."

Jack felt his mouth drop open a little bit. "Is that all, sir?"

"Yes, I think-" Hammond began, glancing at his notes again. "Ah, no it's not." A tiny grin formed on his lips. "President Hayes also asks you to remind Daniel Jackson that he owes him ten percent. Apparently Doctor Jackson will know what you're talking about. That's all."

"Right, sir." He got up and walked out, so relieved that he didn't notice the tiny reference to Daniel's bet on him and Carter.

So you're not off to jail, the voice said. I'm surprised. Though I can't really believe that the president bet on you and Carter. Seems a bit unprofessional, doesn't it?

Yeah, he griped back at it, and unethical. Seriously, what are you still doing here?

That's for me to know and you to find out, the voice said. It was – as usual – cryptic and mysterious.

"Right," he muttered. He turned down a corridor and caught sight of Daniel. "DANIEL."

The archaeologist stopped and turned. "Yeah Jack?"

"President wants to remind you that you owe him ten percent or something. And I wanted to tell you that if you think you're getting away with this whole betting thing, you've got another think coming." He gave Daniel his Purposefully Smug look – the one that really irritated him – and walked away, towards Carter's new lab.

When he reached the lab he leaned in the doorway and grinned at her. She looked up at him and smiled.

"How'd it go?" she asked him, leaning away from her (he thought) over-used laptop.

"Good. It went good." He grinned wider. "It's a good day."

She understood completely about the fraternization rules – after all, it was a miracle he hadn't been formally reprimanded. When they went on a mission later that week they were completely professional – right up until they left the SGC when they got back Earthside. She'd moved into his house the day after that. Her father was aghast; he tried to persuade her against it, but she stood firm, telling him "It's been years coming, Dad, it's not like we just met."

A week after they moved in together, they'd been at the SGC for a few hours when the alarm sounded for gate activity.

Jack was in Carter's lab (as usual) when it sounded. She was in the middle of trying to run a simulation and he was in the middle of trying to convince her to let him download Tetris on her cell phone so he could play it.

"Jack," she said, her eyebrows pinched together in her most polite annoyed manner, "I am trying to work. Why don't you do the same?"

"I don't have much work," he claimed, flicking his paper football over her head. She glared at him.

"I walked by your office this morning, Jack, and your desk was covered with paperwork. I can't believe you-"

He cut her off. "Hey, did you know your phone has games? Sweet! Tetris! Can I download it?"

"Jack," she said, exasperated. Then the alarm sounded.

"That'd be Teal'c," he said, dropping her cell phone onto the steel countertop and dashing out the door. She didn't protest at his cavalier treatment of her piece of tiny, expensive technology because she was right behind him as he ran to the Control Room. They moved to stand by General Hammond as Daniel came in.

"It's Teal'c's IDC, sir," Harriman said.

"Let him in," the general ordered. The iris contracted and the flickering blue of the event horizon became visible. Teal'c stepped through and then turned, as if waiting.

"Did Teal'c invite Bra'tac or Rya'c back with him?" Daniel asked.

General Hammond grinned a bit, but kept facing ahead. "No, I believe this is a visitor of another caliber."

A woman stepped through, wearing a black leather halter top (Ooh, it's studded the voice said, sounding glazed, and look at those pants…) she looked around and then her gaze settled on the window to the control room and her face split into a large smile.

"Oh no," Daniel said. He looked over at Jack. "You didn't. Tell me you didn't."

Jack smirked at him. "Oh, I did."

By this time the woman had come into the Control Room. She leaned against a computer and practically purred at Daniel. "Daniel, darling, if you wanted to see me this much, you could have come yourself, not sent your Jaffa bodyguard. Honestly, I don't play that hard to get." She looked over at everyone else. "Hello! I'm Vala Mal Doran. So nice to meet you."

He turned red as she tweaked his nose lightly. "Vala, I didn't send for you. Jack did." He pointed the patented Daniel Jackson Accusatory Finger of Doom at Jack. She glanced in Jack's direction. He waved at her.

"Well, hey there little lady. I, uh, 'sent for you' because I think Daniel is in sore need of some female companionship and you're the only live woman I've heard him mention in the last six months."

"Oh Daniel," she cooed, patting his chest, "I didn't know you cared that much."

"I. Don't." Daniel edged away from her, but she was too quick and pulled his wallet out (and by the expression on his face, had grabbed something else on the way out).

I think I could get to love this woman, the voice told Jack. In a completely friendly, non-romantic way, of course. Since Carter is so much hotter than Vala.

Agreed, Jack responded. On both points.

"Oooh," Vala said, pulling Daniel's American Express out from his wallet. "What's this?"

"Don't tell-" Daniel began, but Teal'c cut across him.

"It is a credit card, ValaMalDoran," the Jaffa said. "It is used on Earth instead of currency. Though the cards do come with pre-approved limits. I believe DanielJackson's credit limit is around twenty-five thousand."

Daniel gaped at him. "Why did you tell her that?" he said, at the same time Vala grinned and said, "So where do I spend this, then?"

"I think," General Hammond said, "that before you go spending Doctor Jackson's money-" ("Which she won't be doing," Daniel muttered) "-you should go to the infirmary and get examined to make sure you're healthy."

"Darling, of course I'm healthy!" Vala said, tucking Daniel's wallet down her top. "Can't you tell?" And then she leaned back a bit more, which put her at a very flattering angle. Jack didn't miss the up-and-down look Daniel gave her, or the glance Sam shot him. He grinned at Sam and leaned down.

"I never really cared for brunettes," he whispered in her ear. "Blondes have more fun."

She hid a smile from him. "Of course."

"So Daniel," Vala purred (Ha, did ya see Dannyboy there gulp? the voice said), linking her fingers through his belt loops and pulling him close to her, "after I'm cleared by your medics, what are you going to do with me?"

"I'm not going to do anything," Daniel said firmly. For a second, Vala's smile dropped and Jack could tell there was something behind that cheery exterior.

"But, darling," she started, until Jack cut across her.

"Why don't we take her fishing?" Sam gave him an 'are-you-crazy' look and Daniel gave him his 'I-am-never-going-to-forgive-you-for-this' expression that Jack always got when Daniel got mad at him (like, say, when he broke one of Daniel's so-called "priceless" artifacts).

"Fishing," General Hammond said. "Is that a good idea, colonel?"

"Well, maybe not, sir," Jack said brightly. "But it'd be a good chance to get to know each other. I always say that you can tell a lot about a person by the way you fish." There was silence for a moment after that.

"Yeah, you never say that," Daniel said. Jack glared at him.

"Carter, tell him he's wrong," he said to Sam.

"Sorry, Jack. I have never heard you say that."

"Ohforcryin'outloud," he muttered. "T, man, tell them they're wrong."

"I cannot, O'Neill," Teal'c said, calm as ever. "For I have indeed never heard you utter that phrase."

"Oh, fine," Jack said. "Then I'll start saying it." He looked at Vala. "How do you feel about Minnesota?"

"I've never been there," she said brightly, giving him her toothy grin. "And I do so enjoy traveling, right Daniel?"

"Right," Daniel groaned. "Great. General, please say no."

"I'm sorry, Doctor Jackson," Hammond said, moving towards the staircase up to the briefing room. "I can't do that. Now, take Miss Mal Doran here to the infirmary and get her checked out." With that, he went upstairs. Jack could've sworn he heard the man chuckling.

"Well!" Jack said, clapping his hands together. "Looks like we're goin' fishing!"

Everyone groaned, except for Vala, who sighed rather melodramatically. Daniel glanced at her.

"What?" he asked her.

She gave him a mournful look as she flashed his American Express card at him again and said, "I'm afraid I simply don't have anything to wear."