A/N: HOHOHO, guess what? I'm early! haha, even I can't believe it-laughs- So now you all know, right? This story is not on hiatus^_^Alright, enjoy!:D
Disclaimer: Ah, forgot to say that I don't own. X2 cuz I didn't put the disclaimer for the last chapter...+_+
Retrace IV: Acceptance
"We desire the courage to face towards the future, so we get lost in the past."
"Ojou-sama, I told you to wait for me. See what happened when you ran around!"
Just as Sharon was thinking of something to fill that awkward silence, a most familiar voice rang in her ears.
Her head snapped up disbelievingly and she immediately turned in that direction.
Indeed, it was the very same white hair and red eyes.
Her companions each had similar expressions of surprise on their faces.
Well…that was fast.
Stupefied in their seats, they just stared.
"Did you know how worried I was? I-"
Sharon was the first to react.
"You idiotic Break!"
She literally jumped on the white-haired man, wrapping her arms around him tightly and tears of relief flowed down her cheeks.
With no paper in sight to launch her infamous harisen attacks, she immediately resorted to pounding on his back with her fists, albeit a bit weakly.
-X-
The white-haired man stared at his blonde-haired mistress in bewilderment, all previous traces of anger gone from his face.
He pointed at the plum-haired girl still attacking him with his fists.
Autumn returned him a similarly confused look, indicating that she didn't know.
When he thought to perhaps throw her off him, she immediately shook her head frantically.
He sighed.
What was Miss Autumn up to again?
"…Excuse me, Miss. Do you mind if you would be so kind as to get off me? I'm afraid that you are mistaken. I do not know you."He asked stiffly, that painful politeness inviting looks of shock on the foreigners' faces.
The plum-haired girl scrambled away from him, a most distressed look on her face.
"What are you talking about, Break? You've served the Reinsworth house for 15 years and you dare to say that you don't know me? This isn't funny, stop it."
She appeared indignant, her cheeks puffed up in annoyance.
He moped his forehead tiredly.
Looks like there is a serious case of mistaken identity here.
What was this day leading off to?
First the mistress ran off, then when he finally found her, there are a bunch of strange people claiming to know him and calling him by a most ridiculous name?
"Miss, I'm really sorry that you are mistaken. First of all, I do not recall having seen you before. This must be my first time meeting you. Second, from the time since I could remember, I have been serving the Sinclair house. And third, my name is not 'Break'."
-X-
Sinclair?
This really isn't Break?
Sharon started back in horror and stared blankly.
But this really is Break!
How can it not be?
Then Autumn piped up, "It's true! Kevin's telling the truth! Ever since I was born, Kevin have been serving the Sinclair house! I can vouch for it!"
'Kevin' retorted wryly, "I have been serving the Sinclair house before you were born, Miss Autumn."
Autumn pouted.
"Kevin's so mean! I told you to call me Autumn!"
He gave a polite cough.
"We're in the public, Miss Autumn."
"I don't care! You're to call me Autumn!"
Sharon peered closely at 'Kevin' and she suddenly realized that in all her excitement, she never realized that the Break-look-alike had two red eyes.
His white hair was also long, such that it was plaited loosely.
Kevin…Sinclair….So familiar…
All of sudden, she couldn't place it, where she has heard it before.
"Mistress Sharon, my name is Kevin Regnard. I was previously serving the Sinclair house, but from today onwards, I'll be serving the Reinsworth House."
Sharon's eyes widened.
Kevin…..is Break!
Break's real name was 'Kevin Regnard'.
-X-
"Come along now, Miss Autumn. Master would be worried sick if you do not return soon."
Sharon snapped out of her thoughts as Kevin gestured to the carriage waiting outside the inn.
"But…"
Autumn frowned, causing her forehead to become all wrinkly and creased.
"It's getting late, Miss Autumn. You should not trouble these people any further. You have caused enough trouble today."
Kevin appeared a little impatient as he attempted to coax his willful mistress back onto the carriage.
He turned towards them and gave a deep bow.
"I give you my thanks for saving my mistress today. If you hadn't, I would have been in great trouble. We will take our leave now. I am sorry for the trouble she caused."
Then he turned, expecting his blonde-haired mistress to follow.
"Wait, Kevin!"
He stopped, clearly annoyed.
"What is it now, Miss Autumn?"
His patience was clearly wearing out with this strange day.
"I told you not to call me that, Kevin!"
When she was sent a glare in her direction by her not too pleased servant, she timidly added, "Can we invite Big Sister and her friends over to stay at our house? Big Sister and Big Brother were so brave just now! They made the bad man go away. Autumn was so scared…"
Realising that his mistress did make a point, that they did in fact do the Sinclair family a great service, Kevin frowned.
Who knows what might have happened if they hadn't intervened?
"But, the Master…"
"It's alright! I'll persuade Father somehow~"
She gave a devious grin.
Kevin paled.
The last time she did that…he was the one punished.
"Oh please, Kevin…I promise I would not get you into trouble this time…"
She gave her best puppy look as she glanced imploringly at her servant.
"I'm so lonely, I want someone to play with…"
Seeing that it was obviously not working, she changed her tactics and instead resorted to half-truths.
Her adorable blue eyes watered slightly, as if she was going to cry.
And he yielded, just as she had known he would.
"All right, all right! Come along then."
He said gruffly and waved his hands about exasperatedly.
"It will really be fine, trust me!"
Seeing that her plan was working just as she hoped, she skipped over to his side and hugged his arm.
The last time she said 'trust me', the Master came looking for me….
The obviously distressed white-haired man was too pre-occupied in his thoughts to reply.
He didn't seem to notice that close gesture.
The others widened their eyes at this affectionate gesture and wondered what was the relationship between the two of them.
Noticing their questioning looks, Autumn answered cheerfully, "Kevin and I are best friends! I am going to marry Kevin when I grow up!"
At that, the white-haired man immediately sputtered, blushing furiously, "What nonsense are you uttering, Miss Autumn! Haven't I said that you shouldn't say such things in public? I'm a servant and you are a lady!"
But he didn't really seem to mind.
"It's alright! Who cares about that? So long that I love Kevin and Kevin loves me it's fine!"
Oblivious to all the weird looks she was receiving, Autumn was smug.
"Miss Autumn!"
-X-
When the carriage finally stopped before the magnificent Sinclair House, Kevin went forward before them, beckoning for the rest to wait as he stepped into the doors, a most resigned expression on his face.
After a long while, he came out again, a long-suffering look on his face as he followed a well-dressed middle-aged man closely at his heels.
Then he bowed and retreated to the side with the other servants.
The man smiled graciously as his daughter too went to his side and he looked closely at each and every foreigner in the face.
"Welcome to the Sinclair House. I apologise for the trouble my daughter and servant have caused you. Might you be so kind to accept my invitation to stay at our mansion for some time? I would like to properly thank you for saving my daughter's life."
For once, Autumn was silent as she peered meekly at her father, wondering what was on his mind.
Oh dear, is Father going to punish Kevin? I got him into trouble again…...
She turned to pass her best friend a most apologetic look.
He sighed and turned away.
She looked down.
Of course, all that didn't escape Sharon's eyes as she smiled sweetly at the master of the Sinclair House and thanked him for his kindness.
Accepting his invitation, she followed him into the mansion and out of the corner of her eye she saw the little Sinclair mistress scamper to her white-haired servant's side and clung to his arm as she begged for him to forgive her.
For no reason whatsoever, she felt a burning pain in her chest, as if someone had ripped her heart into two.
Is this what they call jealousy?
She wondered, silent tears slipping past the many wounds of her broken heart, tearing and clawing at them, rendering utmost pain.
How foolish I am, being jealous over a girl belonging to Break's past.
Yet she couldn't stop that intense longing that arose in her heart.
Maybe Break was right. I should have just waited.
-X-
That tormented gaze held him firm.
He was entrapped in the profound sadness that leaked out from those rose depths.
Don't look at me with such a face, please.
He doesn't understand how they could have that very same look even though they're different.
How such precious innocence could be tainted by the weariness that came with age.
And how such lovely eyes on that very same young face could be admonishing, while it carried the burden of a family.
"Please Xerxes-nii-san?"
He couldn't bear to look away, but he had to.
Such beseeching eyes, so much similar to someone that he knew, he had already failed it once.
He could not bear to make another empty promise.
Of a love that he couldn't reciprocate.
He knew that he wouldn't be able to face the intensity of those accusing eyes.
So he ran like a coward.
-X-
It was later, that he would regret not having held her hand then and smiled to tell her that it was okay.
As the years passed, something has died inside the girl who once called him 'Xerxes-nii-san'.
Whether it was that pure innocence, or the joy that came with just being alive or something of a totally different matter, he didn't know.
Or maybe he did, but he didn't want to admit it.
In a way, it was after all his fault, for not taking her hand when she reached out to him.
Only sometimes now, when they are alone, will he see ghosts of the innocent carefree girl he had once known.
The politics of the harsh society had effectively hardened her, beyond anything else.
But she was still very much too young.
She was still a child, whether it was at heart or her appearance.
But he knew of what she wanted to do.
All this transformation, it was for him, wasn't it?
He felt pained at the fact that he could do nothing.
So he did what he was best at.
He complied and he became the clown that he was, he served as her knight.
Whatever he could have gotten to before it got to her, he took it down.
He blocked all that he could, if only just to preserve that temporary peace, those precious afternoons of drinking tea and harisen-whacking sessions.
Even when he signed a legal contract with the Mad Hatter, he had her in his mind.
I'll give up the remains of this wretched life, if only for her.
So each time he drew closer to death, he inhaled sharply and held on.
Not yet. For her, I can't die just yet.
So do you hear me, Ojou-sama? Or rather, Sharon, if you insist.
Don't do anything silly.
天上的風被誰推開 溫暖的手是你的愛 (Who pushed the wind aside The warm hand signifies your love)
我還在等待等待你的愛 真實呼喊 (I am still waiting for your love Calling out to you)
A/N: The last 2 lines of Chinese lyrics are from F.I.R's 刺鸟…it's such a beautiful song! And I used the English translation of Parallel Hearts at the beginning, juz to let you know^_^
Okay...first of all, I want to thank you all readers for being so understanding...I'm glad that I don't have to go on hiatus for this story:D
And it's thru my friend's enlightening that I realised that I've worked my math wrongly! Gosh, this is terrible of me...she said that it should be 50 years after the tragedy of sabrie...I'm sorry for the mistake, but can you juz go along with the timeline I've set for this fic? If not the other things I have in mind won't work;_;
I'm terribly sorry!D:
And reviews will make me so happy that I'll start thinking of what to write for the next which is also the last chapter immediately, so pwease~? *begs*
Though I'm really sorry to say that next chapter might come a bit late, like around 20+, cuz I'm having holidays during that week=no com...
~The Absolutely Hopeless Break-fanXP