The Sandbox Tree
Written by Both
TheEvilMuffinToaster & x-Malicious-Me-x
Category: Ouran High School Host Club
Chapter Two: Chemical Reactions
TEMT: Well, I am saddened by the fact that Fanfiction has no fucking AmericaXAustria pairings. Dude, it is a SHAME. They're like the best pairing out there! Excluding the ever awesome ChinaXJapanXKorea pairing and the amazing AmericaXRussia and ItalyXJapan. Of course to those not associated with Hetalia Axis Powers, then I am most likely speaking complete nonsense. –Cough-
XMMX: Loser. And happy crappy birthday; its wednesday right? –Hides plans to blow up New York –
TEMT: You REMEBERED!!!! –Cries-
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"Come Little Children, I'll Take Thee Away Into A Land Of Enchantment. Come Little Children The Time's Come To Play Here In My Garden Of Shadows." – Come Little Children by Brock Walsh
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Chapter Two: Chemical Reactions
"What the fuck just happened!?" Smam remarked.
She let out a manly scream as Twix unceremoniously dropped her and she hit the ground with a thud. Smam rolled over; twitching slightly. How could Twix be so mean to her!? Smam was her sister after all! Alright, she knows Twix can be a bit of a bitch at times, but a bitch is a dog, dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are nature, and nature is beautiful, so it should be a compliment! Smam scowled as Twix clasped her hands behind her back and stared at something behind Smam's fallen body. It wasn't until Twix walked over to the something and asked Smam:
"What kind of second year carries around a stuffed bear?"
Smam rolled over and sat up. She raised an eyebrow when she saw her twin holding a brown bear that was wearing a fancy collar that said: 'If lost return to Tamaki Suoh.' Smam raised an eyebrow and stood up, brushed the dirt off of her pants and strode over to Twix, picking the bear up. She faintly remembered the meeting she had had with the Host Club and this Tamaki Suoh a moment before; stuff like that didn't stay in her mind for long, but... when did Tamaki show any sign of having this brown bear on his person? And when her mind started to drift towards the gates of perverted-ness, Smam slowly started to become mildly freaked out.
"Holy shit!" She dropped the bear. "Dude! I may have the attention span of a kidney stone, but I am sure as the grass is fucking marble green that he did not have that creepy bear on him! I know the little midget had a pink bunny that reminds me of marshmallows, but the tall blond – I know for sure that's Tamaki Suoh! – did not have this bear on him! Where do you think he had it!? Or had it already been left behind by him!? Had someone else been holding it!? I NEED TO KNOW TWIN-DEAR! WHERE THE FUCK DID THIS BEAR COME FROM!? I KNOW FROM WATCHING ENOUGH HORROR FLICKS THAT SHIT DOESN'T RANDOMLY APPEAR FROM NOWHERE."
During that rant, Twix had been zoned out, mind completely engrossed in the changing shape of a wispy cloud above them. Lazily, she decided that it looked like a certain unspeakable part of a male's anatomy and pointed it out to Smam.
Her attention completely diverted from the terrifying mystery of the stuffed bear, Smam let out an intelligent mutter of, "IT'S A PENIS CLOUD! WE HAVE TO NAME IT!" And a string of ludicrous names followed soon after.
Knowing that Smam was nicely occupied for the moment, Twix took off her glasses and started to clean them; ignoring the idiot behind her was much easier than it seemed if one knew It as well as she did. Slowly, Twix's mind wandered to what the type of club those men were a part of. There were seven members, including Haruhi Fujioka, the pretty boy Smam had taken a liking too. Those twins seemed fairly amusing as well with how they toyed around with Haruhi so much in class and in the halls. She liked the one named Hikaru – even though she couldn't tell them apart physically, Hikaru seemed like the more amusing twin if she judged solely by his actions. Twix was hellbent on telling them apart, though – if she could see the differences between herself and Smam, she would be able to tell those motherfuckers from each other.
One member annoyed her slightly – Kyoya Ootori. Or, that's what Twix thinks his name is. Hell, she was pretty sure they didn't mention their names at all, but she's heard the names "Mori", "Hunny", "Tamaki", "Hikaru and Kaoru", "Kyoya" and "Haruhi" all day. Kyoya seemed like a nosy person to Twix – she hated people like that; the ones who couldn't seem to stay out of other people's business. And if that bastard found out that Smam and she were indeed of the X chromosome, she'd be in the world of hell at his hand. And if word got out that Sarah Rouge and Xara Xander were in Japan, she would appear…Twix shuttered at the thought of the reason they were in Japan under aliases in the first place. Someone's blood would be spilled (Kyoya's) if their chance at freedom from that clinically insane fucking woman was destroyed.
"Twin! TWIN! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?" Smam's voice interrupted the girl's thoughts rudely.
"Yes, Smam," she lied.
"Fred it is, then."
"... Fred?"
"The cloud! Its name is Fred." Smam declared proudly.
Another trait that was shared between Twix and Smam was that they forgot things so quickly it was like they had never been mentioned. Said cloud was one of them.
Twix blinked stupidly. "Was that relevant at all?"
"The penis-cloud is entirely relevant!" Smam's voice was lined with indignation. The cloud deserved more respect that that.
Losing interests in her sister's insane mutterings once again, Twix's thoughts wandered to what type of club it was. She guessed that they wanted her and her twin to become customers or something, or they wouldn't have bothered inviting them. Perhaps even members, though she couldn't fathom why... Well Twix didn't want to join and if Twix didn't join, Smam would eventually get bored and quit and just end up blowing shit up after school instead.
Though if it's a cooking club… Twix thought wistfully, staring at her idiot of a twin, who was now attempting to climb a pine tree, possibly to get closer to 'Fred the Penis-Cloud'…I'm going to have a hell of a time declining their offer…
Just the thought of food made her gain five pounds
.
The last class of the day was particularly amusing to both Smam and Twix: Chemistry Lab. A.K.A: The Class where you could blow shit up and not get in trouble for it. The thought of something solid being blown up by chemicals enticed a bright, cheery smile to appear on Smam's face and an aura of maniacal evil appeared around her form; which was particularly scary to the other students, unbeknownst to her. Several of them inched away from Smam's almost maniacal aura. From what Twix had heard, for the first half of the class they had to create fire using only chemicals which caused several students to groan in unison, and for the other half of the class they would be paired off with somebody else–Twix bit her cheek in worry that she would get paired with one of those awful twins – to search through the periodic table of elements and create all sorts of chemical solutions by combining a plethora of different chemicals. Twix's mind wandered back to her earlier thoughts about those god-awful twins… She wished mercy uponwhatever poor, unfortunate, innocent person who got stuck with Smam as their partner. Smam has blown more stuff up then Wiley Coyote, and could get particularly violent when faced with the opportunity for explosions that could lead to arson.
"Alright my lovely new students," Emi-sensei sang to Smam and Twix, who were seated a black-topped chem. Table. "You do not have to do this since you came la–"
"Ahahahahaha, like I'd miss the fucking chance to make something explode." Smam said in a cheerful voice, the dark aura around her flaring. Emi-sensei 'meeped' and slowly backed out of the room. Before she left, however, Twix grabbed the teacher by the forearm and flashed a creepy grin that rivaled Smam's.
"May we please borrow a fan?"
"Err…why?"
"A demonstration of three types of chemically-created fires."
"Oh cool!" Emi-sensei gushed. "You will have to let me see it though!"
"Of course."
And that's when the twins got to work at what they did best.
Over in Europe, in the wonderful country of England, in the city of
Winchester, a green-haired girl sat curled up on the floor with a note clutched tightly in her closed fist. Her green hair was held up by a thin bandeau and her startling green eyes were wet with the salty moisture most called tears. She was dressed in a green hanbok and obviously looked English. Enter: Gustavia "Gust" Dorchester. She then sat up quickly, the note in her hand crinkling as she heard the door to her room slide open. Gust turned her head fast enough that a thick, leather-bound book hit right in the face. She whined and fell backwards, the ridiculously large sleeve of the hanbok covering her whole face.
"Get the fuck up!" A male voice commanded.
Enter Xero Steklasa. An ex-arms dealer and the practical baby-sitter of the Baroness's youngest granddaughter: Gust Dorchester. Really, he had no idea in hell how he ended up becoming some brat's babysitter – but hell, the pay was worth it, even if he had to watch some bratty, green-haired, culturally-retarded eighteen-year-old. He was six foot in height with dark brown eyes and short, dark hair that he had a habit of smoothing down every few minutes or so. His skin was tan and he had long legs and arms; his wrists thin and his hands rather gangly and big. In the back pocket of his light blue jeans, the handle of a GLOCK Nine millimeter could be seen. Xero was a good friend of Smam's and knew all of her secrets and was always up-to-date – he even knew she was currently in Japan and hiding from the green haired girl – and could trust the idiotic blonde with his life. Smam used to have a crush on him when they were preteens, but that blew over when the younger twin fell in love with animated characters from various shows.
"Get the fuck up Gust, you look stupid." He mindlessly scribbled something on the chalkboard located next to the sliding doors and then erased it and flattened his short hair.
"They le-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-eft me-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e!" The green haired girl sobbed, throwing herself onto Xero's legs. He tried to kick himself free, but just ended falling through the paper sliding doors and into the hall. Gust let out a heart-wrenching sob before throwing the crinkled paper at him and crawling towards the dark corner of the room that was painted entirely obsidian-black.
Xero stood up and read the note.
Dear Gust,
If you are reading this my lovely midget (Xero snorted at the crack at Gust's short height), then we have obviously esca– err, I mean left unexpectedly. Yeah, unexpectedly. That's it…Anywho, my lovely chibi, Twix and I have started to feel a tad claustrophobic and tied-down in your home; we can no longer breathe fresh air in that tiny excuse of a house. Even though it is just you, Xero-kun (Who still owes me five bucks), your batshit-insane grandma, and we: Smam and Twix, but we did live on the streets for four years. You should expect that we would have gotten used to the freedom – we did of course, the freedom to blow up whatever we could, sleep somewhere new every night, travel, and meet new people (though we were still anti-social back then – not much has changed in the twelve years). Though we love your grandma and her senile ways and, well, we will miss her crazy acts. Seriously. There will not be a day in my life when I see a fucking seventy-three year old woman riding a unicycle over a pit of bloodthirsty alligators. Tell the bitch I love her.
And I'm sorry for leaving you like this, Gust, and I know you love me and see me as an older sister, but I can't handle you clinging to me and asking me to become one with you. I don't swing that way man. And –
There seemed to be a large scribble and the style of writing changed; obviously meaning Twix had stolen the pen.
What the idiot is trying to say is that she needs time to think, Gust. Out of the blue, you asked Smam to marry you and then groped her breasts like Im Yong Soo from Hetalia Axis Powers and proclaimed that they were yours. My twin needs time to think – we might be back in a year and a half or so. Please don't try to find us.
There was more scribbling out and a few cross-outs and the font changed once more.
Well yes my lovely midget, you asked me to marry you! I'm sixteen god fuck it! I don't want to get married just yet! And no way in hell am I fucking getting forced into an arranged marriage by your grandma – this isn't the fourteenth century. Nor will I ever marry you. I'm sorry Gust, but you're my sister. Hello? I may have strange tendencies tougern–"
Shut up Smam, you're wasting precious ink. Gust, we love you. And we love Xero too (I left Millennia under my bedspring – it's yours). And your batshit crazy grandma. There were tear strains that Xero guessed were Gust's. We'll be back in a year or two – don't wait up.
Love Smam and Twix. (Sarah Rouge, Xara Xander)
Beneath their names were the Korean kanji for Sarah Rouge and Xara Xander.
Xero inwardly leaped for joy at the news. Smam and Twix were out of his hair! The only problem now was an emo-Gust. But he had Millennia! Millennia!!! It was Twix's prized .38 Magnum Revolver with the custom-made silencer! Any Arm's dealers dream. And now it was his!
"Xero," A creepy voice said.
"What do you want now, midget?"
Xero looked up from the letter to stare at Gust who was grinning strangely, her arms inside the large sleeves of her hanbok. Xero immediately narrowed his eyes. Gust wanted to go find them; it was written clear on her face. Oh hell no! Twelve years and they are finally out of his hair! Even though Smam is one of his best friends (though he would never say that to her face), she was extremely annoying. Smam could keep up an intelligent conversation when Xero got done chasing down Gust and running into the janitor David who often annoyed Xero and brought down his IQ levels to what seemed like the single-digit numbers
"Know what we're doing nii-san?" Gust asked in a happy voice.
"Oh, hell no."
"Oh, hell yes! We're going to find Smam!" Gust shouted. "And we will finally be married! Kyahahahahahahaha!"
Xero chose that moment to make his quick getaway. Since Smam wasn't there at the moment, he would need to save all the IQ points he could before they disintegrated.
"Twix, I need two containers of Potassium Permanganate, a bottle of glycerin, a cup of dyed-blue sugar, a container of sodium chloride, a bottle of car-antifreeze, and sulfuric acid."
"Large or small containers for potassium?"
"Large please."
Emi-sensei watched the two twins do their separate work. Twix set up the fan and aimed it towards the ceiling while Smam set up three different workstations; one had blue sugar, sodium chloride, and sulfuric acid; one had Potassium Permanganate, glycerin, and green-colored water; and the last one just had Potassium Permanganate and antifreeze. At each station was a two-ply tissue. Smam was listening to music as she did her work and Twix seemed off in her own world – it scared Emi slightly of how experienced these two were with potentially dangerous explosive chemicals.
"Class!" Emi announced. "My two newest children seemed so experienced with the chemicals! Let us watch them work!" With some herding from Emiko, the class was gathered around the table on which Smam and Twix worked. Smam was obviously annoyed by it; she hated when people watched her explode things. It get really annoying when they tried to stop her from mixing the wrong chemicals and creating a terrible fire. Pfft, they are no fun.
"My twin and I discovered this with a dear friend of ours," That dear friend was Gust, who wanted to see the twins in action, "It is called Pyro-Fire. Obviously means 'Fire-Fire'. Don't do this at home, Smam's set the kitchen ablaze while trying this."
"Well you were in the bathroom and I got bored and Xero locked me out of Doro's room!" Doro was short for Dorshdaia, the bat-shit crazy grandma who Smam so awesomely praises.
"... Back to the point. We will begin now."
Twix took the two ply tissue and covered it in Potassium Permanganate before dipping it in anti-freeze. The two chemicals clashed for power and started to burn. Soon a small red fire appeared at the edge of the napkin. Twix turned the fan on and threw the napkin on top of it. Smam was next. She wet the edge of the tissue and dipped it in the green sugar before dipping it in the sodium chlorate; the sugar and sodium fizzed but did not spark. Smam then poured some of the sulfuric acid on the sugar and sodium and a large pop sounded from the smoking tissue. A green colored fire started up and Smam threw the burning tissue on top of the fan. Twix started on the last one. She wet the entire tissue in the blue colored water and then covered it in Potassium Permanganate and then dumped glycerin all over it. The blue and black tissue burst into flame and Twix threw it onto the operating fan. The hard part was over, and now the fun began.
It was an amazing thing to watch. Emi had dramatically dimmed the lights and now the three tissues – the red, the blue, and the green – were flying up and down on the fan; steadily moving closer to each other. Since the fan was black and blended in with the table and it surrounding; the bright balls of fire appeared to floating in the darkness. Soon the tissue was burned up and the three balls of fire was attracted together creating one big flame, the weight of the flame pulled it down and the force of the wind from the fan blew it up and it dissipated.
Emi let out a whoop and glomped Smam, nearly knocking the twin over.
"My dear Smam!" Emi said and Smam twitched. "You and your twin are so obviously experienced! Therefore, it is only sensible that I pair you with another explosive artist! Kaoru, come here!" The orange-haired twin from earlier hesitantly stepped towards them and stood next to the five-foot-six teacher. Emi pushed him next to Smam. "Now! You two shall be partners! And Twix! You shall be paired with Reiki!" She pushed the older twin towards a brown haired boy with sharp glasses. "Class! Gather your partners for the year and grab a book! It is time to begin the second half of the activity!" With several groans from the students, they paired up and Twix moved away, ignoring Smam's frightened look.
"Shall we get to work…?" Kaoru asked hesitantly.
"Uh-huh." Smam agreed, snapping on her goggles. "I'm Saran Rouge. Pleased to make your acquaintance."
"Yeah, you were fighting with those two guys earlier." Kaoru grabbed two books and passed one to her. "Are you a black-belt?"
"Nope. No arm strength whatsoever."
"Then how'd you flip that guy?"
"When my lovable Twix is in danger, my nurturing senses kicked in."
"Isn't the younger twin supposed to protect the eldest?"
"I am the youngest – I'm just taller than Twix, a fact I rub in his face daily."
Kaoru stared at the female-in-disguise before him. Some of the females around the school said that Smam and Twix were lovers and escaped from their English home because of the hatred towards their impossible love. Kaoru wanted to ask what it was to like to love the other half of you – even though the two were not truly blood-related – and asked if it was true love. But that would be downright rude. He silently thought back to what Tamaki had said about the twins….
"Alright men!" Tamaki said, slamming his hand down onto his palm. "From what I heard from the lovely princesses, we have two truly real twincesting lovers! Xavier Xander and Saran Rouge. We need to find out their secrets so your own act can become more popular and more real! They must become customers!"
"But we don't actually know if they are in love with each other," Haruhi pointed out.
"Nonsense my lovely daughter! The ladies of Ouran would never fabricate such lies!"
"Right…"
"Devil twins! You must get the two to come here!"
"Why?" The twins asked their imbecile of a lord.
"We must learn their secrets of love! And their past too!"
"I thought Kyoya did a background check?"
"I found nothing." Kyoya said, appearing out of no where. "The only thing I found was the death of a Clarabelle Rouge twelve years ago and something about some boy named Xero."
"The Shadow Lord found nothing!?" The twins repeated. Kyoya knew everything! His shadow-like ways got the dirt on everyone, how could he not find out who those girlish twins were!?
"This sounds like a bad spy-movie…" Haruhi mumbled.
"Nonsense my daughter!" Tamaki shouted. "Those twins obviously erased all signs of their past when they fled from Winchester with themselves in each others arms and came here to Japan to find peace! They just want to fit in, and we the Host Club, shall help them!"
Kaoru looked at Smam and watched him prance around with those iPod ear buds in his ears, the cord leading to the pocket on the blue blazer. Slightly, he could hear the lyrics of "Maru Kaite Chikyuu" by Belarus (Russia's fucking batshit crazy sister stalker and the only woman alive that can make him cry) and he was happily singing along with the lyrics.
"Hey hey older brother, are you pretending to be out? Hey hey older brother, Hey hey older brother, I can't forget the feeling of that doorknob I recently destroyed~! Open the door, Open the door, Open the door, I'm Belarus. Tell me you'll marry me. Pledge it, older brother~! Marriage…" He continued humming the song and he continued mindlessly flipping through the pages of his science book.
Oh yeah, for once in his life, he agreed with those crazy-ass fangirls.
"HELP! I'M BEING KIDNAPPED! RA-A-A-A-APE!!" Smam screeched as two hands grabbed her by the shoulders and dragged her out of the room. Twix shouted something in English as an identical pair of hands grabbed her arms and dragged her from the room. Emiko just waved from her perch on the desk. Smam attempted to kick her attacker, but he mindlessly chuckled and kept on kidnapping her.
It was Kaoru Hitachiin? Smam could not tell them apart at times – but she, like Twix, was hellbent on figuring out which one was which. She thought it was Kaoru; she was going to get him a name tag if it was the last thing she did.
"Why the fuck are you kidnapping me!?" Smam yelled.
Kaoru? didn't answer. Soon, he and his twin swung open a pair of big ornate doors that Smam immediantly thought of driving a tank through to see their sufficiency. She was rudely thrown onto a soft couch along with her twin-dearest. Two hands clamped down on their shoulders and Smam felt the cool metal of a pair of steel handcuffs. She swore and attempted to move to only find out, her left leg had been handcuffed to the leg of the comfortable couch that she was now chained too. Twix let out a string of violent swears in what seemed Australian-accented English that promised a slow death by sharp objects while being chained to quote 'a fucking Kangaroo and a Dingo.'
"Motherfucking faggots!" Smam swore, feeling around in her pockets for her trusty Swiss army knife. Damn it! She left it behind in England. What the hell?!
"Mr. Rouge," the black haired, glasses-wearing boy that Twix knew as Kyoya Ootori spoke. "I have done extensive research on your background –" Kyoya had to duck when Smam's almighty red pen imbedded itself in the wall behind him. Fixing his glasses, he continued speaking. "I did a background check on you and your brother and I came up with nothing. Why is that?"
"How the hell should I know?" Smam barked. "And why the hell am I chained up? And what is with this damn couch? It feels so soft! It's raping my skin!"
"Mr. Xander?"
"I am as clueless as my twin on the matter. I do not know why our background is practically nonexistent." Well, that was a lie. Of course the backgrounds would be nonexistent. Saran Rouge and Xavier Xander were only aliases, after all.
"Well we have another question for you." Kyoya said and fixed his glasses again. Smam's eye twitched. She was going to break those fucking glasses if they shined in her eye one more time…!
"Well what is it then? Because I am obviously not going anywhere." She shook the stupid chain that kept her prisoner for emphasis on the matter.
"Tea?" Haruhi asked Twix and Smam.
"Thank-you Haruhi." Twix said graciously, taking the cup of Chamomile tea. Haruhi looked towards Smam and she snorted.
"I can't stand Tea."
"But you're English!" The blond idiot from earlier cried dramatically; appearing from nowhere. Where the hell are all of these guys coming from?!
"I grew up in England, moron. It seems I can't express this enough. I enjoy Frappicinos and coffee drowned in sugar. Now please shut the fuck up; my brain cells are committing suicide as you keep up this chatter." She looked towards Kyoya, her gray eyes cold. "Now what the hell is your idiotic question?"
"Are you and your twin lovers?
****
"Smam, Twix? Why are you leaving again?" Asked a tale pale, gray-haired woman with bright green eyes and wearing a white and red Hanbok with ridiculously big sleeves. She looked quite funny in it.
"Because we need to get the fuck away from Gust." Smam deadpanned. Seriously, she had a fucking hicky on her neck from the eighteen year old. To Smam, this was pedophilia – or molestation. Gust was two years older than Smam and wanted to marry the latter for some fucking strange reason. Ever since Smam had gotten her license, Gust has wanted to marry Smam. And Smam has been sexually harassed and violated by the green-haired granddaughter of Dorshdaia Dorchester. AKA: "Doro", the bat-shit crazy grandmother that treated Smam and Twix as her own and Xero as her husband (He will be the first man to go down in History with an irrational fear of old ladies).
"So you're leaving?" Xero asked, edging away from the old hag that smiling creepily at him. Stupid old people.
"Yes, we are."
"Where is Gust?" Smam asked with a note of panic in her voice.
"At college," Doro replied in a happy tone. Ah, she was amused beyond belief when Gust said she wanted to go into the Air force, but then the green haired girl changed her mind and decided to go into Law and become a Lawyer. Xero grudgingly agreed that the four-foot-two girl would be a damn good lawyer. Gust always got her way; somehow, someway, but she always got it.
And that's what caused Smam and Twix to flee.
"So you'll be heading to Japan?" Doro asked
"Yeah, she'll never look there. Well, she will eventually, but let's hope she won't go to such extremes and get over her infatuation with me…" Smam gulped and looked around. Only Gust could cause so much panic for the younger twin. Any minute, Smam expected Gust to pop out from a closet and grope her breasts; claiming that they are hers.
"Thank you, Doro."
"No problem my lovely Twix! But will we speak soon?"
"Of course."
"I won't let Gust see the letters."
"If you do, make sure you burn where they were sent from."
"Okee-dokie."
"Xero," Smam said in a happy voice, "you've been my best friend for years now and have kept my IQ level from falling to the negative numbers. I wish you luck."
Xero rolled his eyes. Smam sounded like she was off to make a life-changing decision or sacrifice herself to some horny demigod. Though since she's running from Gust, Xero wouldn't be surprised if that was what she was doing.
"Good luck Sarah, Xara. God speed."
The twins blew a kiss at the old lady (who caught it and dramatically swooned) and hefted their things over their shoulders and picked up their suitcases. With one final look at the bat-shit crazy Doro and the ever-sarcastic Xero, Smam and Twix left Dorchester Manor for the final time.
***
"WHAT!?" It was not Smam who screamed this out; it was Twix. Her aloof shield popped like a balloon as her anger swelled to dangerous levels. "How dare you make such an assumption! I love my twin dearly, but that is just and insult to all and above! Are you fucking stupid? Are you fucking moronic? Are you so ill-minded and have nothing better to do but to pick on the new children for some bullshitting rumors those ladies with nothing else to do in their spare time made up? My twin and I are not lovers! Smam would slap me upside the head and push me out of a moving vehicle if I tried to 'become one with my twin'."
The room went eerily silent and Smam's small frown turned into a grin as she felt her ever-trusty iron-cutter resting comfortably in her knee-high socks. Ah, she would fucking bear-hug Xero the next time they crossed paths for giving her the socks. She pulled it out and cut the handcuff on her wrist and ankle. She stood up as the blond idiot immediately tried to calm the angry twin down.
"But my dear prince, the lovely ladies would never fabricate such lies! The story of how you and your twin escaped from your London town under the cover of midnight in order to escape judgment from your peers for your incest-ing love you share for one anot – AHYEEH!" Tamaki let out a girlish screech as a four-inch knife imbedded itself in the wall right by his ear; narrowing missing the small appendage.
"Stay the hell out of my background!" Smam growled. "Twix, this was a terrible idea to come here. Fuck this, we should have gone to Canada – They have Tim Hortons."
"Why did you escape England in the first place?" Kyoya asked; eerily calm. "Was it because of Claribelle Rouge?"
Smam froze in her tracks upon hearing that name and her already-gray eyes dilated beyond normal size. She stared at Kyoya, fear in those gray-eyes of her. She then put on hand over her eye and smiled creepily before she spoke.
"She was my mother." Smam said sadly. "And no, she was not the reason I left England." Smam turned away; her gray eyes mysteriously full of moisture. She opened the nearest window and jumped out of it and the soft muted thud meant she landed safely.
"Nice job." Twix commented dryly. "Must you bring up the skeletons in the closet? Smam's mother was a woman I never met. She was killed long before her time." Twix picked up the forgotten iron cutter.
"Killed?" Tamaki repeated; his eyes widened.
"Smam's mother was killed by a former customer of hers. She was a prostitute before Smam had been born, but when she fell pregnant, Clarabelle gave up that job and raised Smam the best she could. Ends were always met – she always found a way. Smam still had a picture of her mother; her last one. Anyways, Clarabelle's older customer was back in town and found her and Smam. He got angry when he leaned his favorite whore wasn't working anymore and then he met Smam and came to the conclusion that the latter was his. Clarabelle fought valiantly and to the death for her little Smam, but in the end, lost. He slit her throat. Killed her." In a trembling voice, she added, "All while Smam watched."
Twix looked at her watch on her wrist.
"Oh dear, look at the time, I must be going."
With that, Twix wandered over to the window and crawled onto the ledge. Before jumping, she turned around and stared at the Host Club and spoke: "I sleep with a gun." And then jumped out the window.
The Host Club had no words.
TEMT: Well, now that that's out of the way. The fun starts now.
XMMX: You have no life.
TEMT: I know :D