What a View

It was late at night, and Shawn was still riding. It had been two days since he had taken off. He had contemplated going to Mexico but decided against it, it wasn't the same without Gus. He looked over to the side of the road and saw a sign that read, SANTA BARBARA, 5 MILES. He pulled over to the side of the road and took off his helmet.

Shawn looked around and said with finality, "This is the spot." He slowly walked into the woods and began to climb uphill. He pushed aside a branch that got in his way and murmured, "Almost there."

He pushed through a thick clump of leaves to reveal a stunning view. It was a view that overlooked the entire city of Santa Barbara. He had discovered it by accident, 12 years before, when he had decided to skip town. He had needed to use the bathroom and had stumbled upon it. It had become his special place. Whenever he really needed to think he came here, because in this place, he could think.

This view encapsulated everything that Santa Barbara was and still is, from the Psych office to the beautiful beaches.

Everything. Everything that Shawn loved…and hated. When he had been here all those years ago, this view sickened him. It reminded him of his father, of the divorce, of everything. What did it remind him of now?

Juliet.

That's what he saw, Juliet, standing in the police department, wondering where he'd gone. Alone, afraid, he left her. Just like he'd left his father, just like he'd left everything he'd ever done.

Why? Why did he always leave? What was it that made him run?

A cage. Being trapped in. He couldn't stand it, that feeling of being tied down. That's why he'd left Abigail on that pier, that's why he'd left town after high school…and that's why'd he'd left now. A cage.

Is that what Juliet was to him? Is that what a relationship would lead to? A cage? Nowhere to run? Nowhere to hide either. He'd be exposed, vulnerable. She'd see him, but more than that, she'd know him. Really know him, and that scared the shit out of him. His entire life he had used jokes, a façade, and his cockiness to cover up himself. It was a shield to protect him from all that could hurt. Because that's what happens when you let yourself show.

You get hurt. Simple. As. That.

But maybe…just maybe, it could be worth it. "The best things, the richest things, are the things that don't come easy." Maybe she was right; maybe it wasn't supposed to come easily. He'd always gone with the easy relationships, no ties.

Even with Abigail. It had been relatively easy; he didn't let her see who he really was. Maybe it was time to face the pain, the hurt.

Shawn stood up, ready to leave. He looked back at the view one last time and once again saw Juliet, standing in the police department. But she wasn't alone this time, this time he was standing beside her.