A/N: Wow, it's been five days since I last updated, and there really isn't much to show for it. :P Just kidding. I wrote this chapter, but there honestly isn't much Channy in it. I was contemplating just leaving it out all together, but I decided to just write it instead. Thank you, reviewers: Fluffness, channylover101, WildeEngel, call me what you want, and channy is awesomeness! This chapter doesn't really come close to the last one, but hey, that's just because of the episode itself! :D Please review.
Stormy with Patches of Sky
"You don't have to call anymore. I won't pick up the phone." –Taylor Swift
The ambassador of fun – my new title. Self-appointed, of course. And it even came with a hat! I had decided to be the ambassador of fun when I found out that an underprivileged little girl from the Children Having A Dream foundation was coming to spend the day at So Random!. I was in the commissary with Tawni, preparing a basket, complete with muffins and bananas (no, Tawni wasn't preparing it, of course – I was), when Chad walked up.
"Oh, hey, look at that! It's me and my cast at every hot club in Hollywood," Chad boasted, pointing at the numerous pictures of him in Tawni's magazine before turning to me. "Oh, and you in a dumb hat." He spun the propeller on my ambassador of fun hat, and I glared at him.
"Well, we don't care about pictures in magazines!" Tawni scoffed at Chad. I tried hard to keep a straight face; after all, she had just been lamenting the fact that she was underphotographed. "Okay? We have charity." She placed her hand on the basket possessively, as though she had been the one who went to all of the work necessary. I swear, she's as bipolar as Chad.
"You don't care that you're on page 48 of Tween Weekly?" Chad informed us as he sat down. Tawni gasped.
"We are?!" She pulled open the magazine in anticipation before her forehead wrinkled in disappointment and disgust. "This is how the world sees us," she folded open the page and held it up to me. "Cheese pants. This is why we don't get invited anywhere cool!" I started playing around with the propeller on my hat as she spoke, brushing off her claim. Chad chuckled.
" Sure." He looked at me pointedly as I whirled the propeller once more, grinning in delight as it spun around. "It's the pants." I immediately ceased and glared at him again. Leave it to him to spoil my fun. Honestly, if I didn't like him, I wouldn't like him! …Did that even make sense?
"Chad, you are so superficial," I accused. Instead of the retort I expected, he laughed. That was odd.
"Yeah, all I hear from that is 'Chad, you are so super,' blah blah blah." He added in hand gestures to make his pint, and I rolled my eyes as he pursed his lips at me. Useless. Utterly useless. I returned to arranging the gift basket and lost all interest in the conversation around me until Tawni suddenly pulled my chair back. I then found out that I had almost upset Mr. Condor, the owner of Condor Studios, and therefore the one who had the authority to cancel my show at a moment's notice. How lovely.
As was Dakota, the little girl from the Children Having A Dream foundation. She was incredibly appreciative of the gift basket, and her profound reflections on struggles and name calling surprised e with their depth. Of course, all that disappeared once she saw a poster of none other than Chad Dylan Cooper.
"Mackenzie Falls shoot here?! I had no idea!" she smiled innocently at me before sighing. "I love Chad Dylan Cooper." Join the club, sweetheart.
"Yeah, so does Chad Dylan Cooper," I countered, crossing my arms as I mentally replayed a few of his more selfish moments.
"Can I meet him?" Dakota begged, much more excited now than she had been a few minutes ago. Gee, thanks. I wonder why.
"But you won the day at So Random!!" I reminded her quickly, smiling and hoping her enthusiasm for my show would reappear. It didn't, and her face fell.
"I…get it, Sonny. It's just another disappointment," she mourned in the voice of one who has suffered many tragedies. And, of course, I fell for it.
"No! No no no no! Sonny Munroe does not disappoint!" I assured Dakota, and her expression lit up again. "Yeah! She appoints!" The look on her face was totally worth it.
"You'd do that for me?" she asked incredulously, a grin to match mine spread across her face.
"Just watch me dial my cell phone," I promised, pulling it out as I spoke.
"This is Chad Dylan Cooper," said the answering machine on the other side. "Sorry I can't come to the phone right now, but if you were important enough, you'd have the number to the phone I answer." My jaw dropped in disbelief. He gave me the number that was for people of lesser or no importance to him? I hid my distress and hung up the phone, turning to Dakota.
"Let's go get some ice cream!" I hastily suggested, hoping that the promise of Mackenzie Falls and its main star wasn't one that I was going to regret. But of course, it was. In the commissary, Dakota hardly ate her burger, and she commented that "her life was sour." So, of course, I picked up the phone and called Chad again. What else was I supposed to do? This time, however, he actually picked up.
"CDC here," he greeted. Gosh, he couldn't even answer with a simple "hello"? He had to somehow fit his name in?
"Really, Chad?" I fought the urge to roll my eyes.
"Sonny? Oh, man, I answered the wrong phone?" Ouch. Further confirmation that he didn't want to talk to me. Dakota's hopeful face caught my eye, and I bit back the retort I was going to give Chad.
"Listen, I need a favor," I said sweetly, hoping it would help. "I have the sweetest girl here, and she really wants to meet you." Chad chuckled.
"Ooh. What's she look like?" Was that really all he cared about? What the girl looked like? Good to know. I had fallen for the shallowest jerk in existence.
"She's nine," I informed him with some pleasure. At first, there was silence on the other end. I held my breath, hoping he would accept - and then I heard the dial tone. Chad had hung up on me. I froze for a moment in shock at his rudeness, but Dakota and her expectant expression remind me that I have to pretend Chad is wonderful. I wouldn't want to crush her fantasies like Chad crushed mine, after all. "Yeah, no, bad connection! I'll call you back, don't worry about it," I faked into the phone, giggling at "Chad."
"Bad connection," I told Dakota as I hung up and redialed his number. She nodded, but didn't seem very convinced. I needed to work on being more believable.
"CDC, what it do?" Chad answered the phone. I guess he had forgotten that it was the wrong one. Lucky me.
"Look, Chad, I have the sweetest little girl in the world here, and she really wants to meet you," I entreated. Yes, I was begging Chad Dylan Cooper. But only for Dakota's sake. That underprivileged little girl didn't know what lengths I was going to.
"Man, I gotta get a third phone," was his only response. I took a deep breath, controlling myself.
"Come on, Chad. She really, really wants to meet you. She's a huge fan." I hoped that his already inflated ego would get a kick out of meeting a fan like Dakota.
"Yeah, of course she does. But unlike you, we're very busy at Mackenzie Falls. So besides, I'm – " I caught sight of Chad in a bathrobe and sunglasses, lazing about with his cast as he made a noise that sounded vaguely like static. "Hold on. There's a tunnel. I'll talk to you later. We should hang out," he slurred in between more pretend static. Hang out? Yeah, right! Not when he gave me a different number for his phone and made fun of my hat! I got fed up and yelled through the phone.
"Chad, I can see you!" He immediately sat up in his chair and glanced around, peering over his sunglasses until he saw me. He froze for a couple seconds before replying.
"Alright, so you can see that I'm very busy? So don't bring that kid over to the Falls either, because we are all very busy," he said before hanging up once more. That was really getting irritating. But there was really only one thing to do if Chad didn't want to meet Dakota. And that was to break the news to her.
"Okay, I'll talk to you later! Peace out," I said into the phone as I walked back into the commissary, pretending once again that Chad was still on the other line. Dakota looked up at me with wide, excited eyes. I hated having to disappoint her.
"Look, Dakota, Chad can't make it. He's, uh, very busy." I had a feeling that the excuse wasn't going to work on her any more than it had on me.
"Of course he is," she sighed unhappily. "Story of my life." Okay, the tragic, dramatic thing really wasn't helping.
"Hey, come on! Now, when life gives you lemons, what do you do? You make lemonade!" I tried to cheer her up. It didn't work.
"I don't want lemons, I want Chad!" Dakota whined. Yeah, so did I, but neither of us got what we wanted. I looked around for something to console her with, and my eyes fell on the basket I had prepared earlier.
"Well, what if that lemonade you were drinking was coming out of a So Random! crazy straw?" I asked, holding it up for her to see. "See, it's so…" Dakota interrupted me with a pout.
"I. Want. CHAD!" she yelled before stomping on my foot as hard as she possibly could and running away. Well, at least I was a little more mature about it. I ran after her as she stormed into the prop house, where the rest of my castmates were hanging out. It was pretty much a disaster. Dakota's true self came out when she destroyed "Gnomie," shouted at all of us, demanded to see Chad, and stomped on my foot once more. She then managed to tie me up and gag me. Once my cast found me, I was ready to kill that little devil. And then we were startled to find that she was the daughter of Mr. Condor, meaning that we had to acquiesce to her wishes. Otherwise, our show would be cancelled.
Another bombshell? The Children Having A Dream foundation actually stood for CHAD. Uh huh. You'd think I would have realized that. "Children Having A Dream" didn't even sound grammatically correct. Dakota sent us all out to bring Chad to her, and I had the dubious honor of finding him first.
"I'm looking at them on my other phone right now!" Chad exclaimed into one of his phones as I came up to him. He seemed pretty frustrated, and I was tempted to ask him why. But then I remembered that my day hadn't exactly been peachy either, and there was a very particular reason for that. Which was my reason for talking to Chad anyways.
"Hey, Chad, I need something – "
"Yeah, let me tell you what I need. Okay?" Chad interrupted. I frowned at him. I guess I didn't need to ask him what was wrong after all.
"Why are your needs always more important than mine?" I hoped he would take on his nice persona and deny it, but he didn't. Shocking. Instead, he continued with informing me about his needs. Ahem. That sounded a bit wrong.
"Look, your friends got into this hot new club called 'The Basement,' and you have got to get me in there." Gasp! Chad Dylan Cooper needed something from me? I relished the feeling of power.
"Oh! So you need something from me, huh?" I crossed my arms and smirked at him. It was good to finally be holding something over him instead of the other way around. Even though I needed something from him too.
"Where's this going?" Chad asked quickly. He could obviously tell that I had something up my sleeve.
"I'll get you into the Basement," I promised. It couldn't be that hard, right? Especially since Tawni, Nico, and Grady knew where it was.
"Awesome," Chad nodded in agreement.
"And," I added with a grin. I knew that he wasn't going to like my condition once he met the little demon of a fangirl.
"This is why I have two phones," he explained. I ignored the pang that his statement gave me and continued.
"You take that little girl from the charity with you. Actually, funny little story, she's not actually from a charity. She's – " Chad cut in again.
"Sonny, I don't care about the girl, or the charity, or your funny little stories that seem to never be funny or little." Ouch. Fine. If that's the way he wanted it, I wasn't going to hand him information. He could be as surprised as I had been. "Okay, I'll do whatever, I just need to get into the Basement." Chad emphasized the last few words with a touch of urgency. Honestly, what was the big deal about the Basement anyways? I shook my head.
"No problemo. And you know what? I won't bore you with any details of who that little girl is," I leaned forward unconsciously and smiled at him. He wasn't going to know what hit him.
"Good," Chad retorted.
"Good," I repeated satisfactorily.
"Fine," he shot back as I usually did. I laughed and shook my head again as I walked off.
"Fine," I said nonchalantly. I could see the confusion on his face, and it made me grin even wider. That soon disappeared, however, once I found out that the Basement didn't exactly exist. We rebuilt it, though, and I hoped fervently that no one else would find out – in particular, Chad and Mr. Condor. Tawni was sent to bring Chad in, blindfolded, and I brought Dakota.
"Chad," I addressed him in our customary manner.
"Sonny," he responded. "Alright, let's get this over with. Where's the punchline to your funny little story?" I grinned as I made the introductions.
"Chad, Dakota," I gestured. "Dakota," I began as she pulled off her blindfold. She gasped in delight.
"CHAD!" she squealed. Chad smiled, always glad to see his fans.
"Aw. You must be the sweet little girl I'm obligated to hang with!" Dakota clapped twice in response, the cue for me to pick her up. She studied Chad's face at first before examining the back of his head. He seemed fairly disturbed by her inspection, and I would have laughed if I wasn't currently holding her up. One of Dakota's favorite songs began to play, and I was forced to keep holding her as she danced with Chad. I exchanged glares with him over the top of her head before she drew his attention back to her.
"So…I'm feeling a little third-wheel-ish, but thanks for the dance!" I exclaimed before setting Dakota down and walking away. Tawni came up to meet me.
"So far, so good. Chad's believing it," she said. I laughed.
"Yeah, well, Chad still believes Miley and Hannah are two different people." Tawni and I snickered as Chad's dance with Dakota came to an end.
"So, it was great meeting you. You have outstanding taste in TV stars, I just need to dance with someone a little more…not you," Chad said as he tried to escape. It couldn't have been me he was looking at when he was searching for a dance partner, could it? No. No, definitely not. That was just my subconscious wishing he was.
Dakota made her demands for the evening known to Chad, who got more than a little creeped out and walked away. He attempted to make a move on the girls Nico and Grady were with (I suppose it wasn't me he was looking at after all), but it failed, most likely because Dakota was clinging to his leg, as he pointed out. Just then, Mr. Condor walked in, blindfolded and dancing. Chad immediately tried to schmooze, as per usual.
"Oh, hey, Mr. Condor! Hey, how's it going, man?" Then he made the mistake that I had most hoped he would. "Can you believe this little brat?" Chad asked, gesturing to Dakota.
"Daddy! Daddy!" she exclaimed in response before running into Mr. Condor's arms.
"D-Daddy?" Chad put his hand up to his mouth, as if he could take back the words he had said. I walked up to him and smirked.
"Yeah, there's your funny little punchline!" I smacked him on the arm, glad to get back at him. "And boy, is he gonna be mad at you for yelling at his daughter!" Mr. Condor put Dakota down and walked over to me and Chad. We instinctively moved backwards.
"Sonny? You brought my precious angel to a Hollywood club?"
"Sounds like he's mad at you," Chad chuckled nervously. Did he seriously have such good luck that he wasn't going to get blamed?
"Oh no!" Mr. Condor pointed a finger at Chad. "He's mad at you too!" Ha. At least I wasn't the only one.
"Actually, Mr. Condor, it's a really funny story," I began anxiously when Chad broke in.
"Trust me, it's really not that funny," he added as we continued to back up. I gasped as I ran into the wall, grabbing onto Chad's arm automatically.
"And you're really gonna love this part!" Chad and I ran away from the wall as it collapsed, only to watch the wall on the opposite side fall as well. I clutched onto Chad's arm as we backed away unconsciously until I realized what I was doing. I quickly let go as Chad and Mr. Condor unclasped their hands as well. Apparently we all panicked. Hopefully Chad was so preoccupied with Mr. Condor on his other side that he didn't notice my clinging to him.
"This club is fake!" Mr. Condor announced. I fake laughed again.
"Of course it is! You don't think I would bring your daughter to a real Hollywood club, do you?" I asked him, hoping that it sounded logical.
"You expect me to believe that you built all this for my daughter?" Mr. Condor asked. Tawni popped up on his other side.
"Do you believe it?" she inquired hopefully. Mr. Condor paused and thought about it for a moment. I smiled at him nervously.
"Well. Coming from Chad, I'd say it was a little butt-kissy." Chad looked away, slightly embarrassed. "But from you, Sonny? Sure." I let out a sigh of relief. I had actually gotten away with it! "Let's go, angel." Mr. Condor and Dakota left as Tawni restrained Zora. Chad started to chuckle.
"I know, everything turned out good!" I smiled along with him.
"Oh no, I'm not laughing at that," he smirked, pulling out his phone. "I'm laughing at this. Cuz this is actually a funny story. So Random!, fake club…" he snapped pictures on his phone as the crowd murmured. Tawni strolled up with her phone in hand as well.
"Chad Dylan Cooper. Dancing. Nine-year-old girl!" She displayed her own pictures. I quickly stepped in between her and Chad and ordered them both to delete them. Surprisingly, they both complied, putting their phones away. A new song came on, and I decided that the mood needed to change.
"So who wants to boogie?" I started dancing, and after an awkward moment, everyone else joined in. I was dancing with Chad! Well, technically not dancing with him, but still. And my show wasn't cancelled. Everything had turned out just fine. Who knew? Maybe Dakota's coming wasn't so bad after all.
A/N: Please, please review. Please. As an early Christmas present?