Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be.

Chapter Nineteen -- I Was Looking For Money, Not Teen Angst

Dear Diary,

Why am I so nervous about my date with Jeremy? I've had a few dates before, and I've never acted like this before. I didn't even sleep much last night; I was a total wreck this morning at breakfast. Of course, Jeremy was there, smiling at me from over by the Ravenclaw table. I was so tense, I couldn't even eat that much. Merlin! What is wrong with me?

Actually, reluctant as I am to admit it, I know exactly what's wrong with me. I finally have a huge, girly crush on someone.

It's not Jeremy.

It was during breakfast, when I first noticed that I wasn't staring at Jeremy, wondering how he was acting the day of our date…Nope. I kept looking at James. It's not that same "Oh crap, maybe I like him," feeling I've been having until now, nope, it's real. Funny thing is, every time I saw him glare at Jeremy, or try to catch my eye, I got this weird little flutter in my stomach, and it wasn't entirely unpleasant. I asked Agie about it, and she says I must have eaten something funny, but she has been acting rather strangely this week, all giggly and smiley and not at all like Adriyana. It's unnerving. How can she be happy when I am clearly in distress over here?

Oh, goodie. My date with Jeremy's coming up in fifteen minutes. And, though I just realized he's not the guy I WANT to be dating, I know he's the one I SHOULD be dating.

Damn. I have to like the rebel, don't I?

-Lily

Dear Diary,

I don't even have to write a Potions essay right now, I actually finished it a week ago. I just told Remus I did because I…well, the best way to explain it is to say that I've got something to prove to myself. Remus and I are in love right I guess I want to show myself how I don't have to totally commit to EVERYTHING to prove we're in love. At first, I worked or it, but now…it's really tiring, and love shouldn't be like that…should it?

That's not how my friends are acting, though. I've hidden all the poisons I could find from Lily (kidding…), I hardly ever see Alice anymore…and, cheese on a cracker, if you could only SEE what Agie is planning…well, I don't know what she's planning but it looks like something important.

Sincerely,

Amber

Dear Diary,

I'm still SO scared that Sirius (with the reputation that he has) will break my heart, but it's finally happened. I've let myself fall completely in love with him.

I'm going to tell him, too. In Hogsmeade. Today.

Kisses,

Adriyana

At first, Sirius hadn't really been bothered by lying to Adriyana, he'd felt bad, but it was just a little white lie, right?

Apparently, it was a lot more important to Adriyana than it had been to him. Not the lying part, but what he'd lied about. Ever since then, Adriyana had been acting kind of…different. And a little strange. Sometimes, Sirius would look up at her, and she'd be giving him what he was pretty sure were called "bedroom eyes," or smiling, one of those smiles one gives to a person they're sharing a secret with.

Which was kind of weird, because they didn't, really.

So, when the next Hogsmeade trip approached, Sirius had fallen into the unfortunate habit of feeling wracked with guilt every five seconds.

He had no idea what would happen today, when he was spending all day with her…Peter had a date, and James and Remus were…well, they were busy too.

Sirius saw two pairs of feet coming down the girls' stairs, Sirius knew one of them was Adriyana (he could tell by the worn out, grey trainers she always wore, no matter how many pairs of new shoes she got), so the other one must be Lily.

He just kind of stood there, waiting for them while ignoring James, who was poking him in the shoulder (unseen, thanks to his Invisibility Cloak) in a very conspicuous way.

"Look at Lily, she looks really….gorgeous," James' voice whispered in his ear.

Sirius looked up. He'd always thought Lily was pretty, but she looked like she'd put a special effort into looking good today. Her coppery hair had been tied in a loose knot on top of her head, and her almond-shaped eyes seemed more radiant, probably due to some kind of new makeup thing that Sirius, being a guy, didn't know or even care to know the specifics of. So, though Sirius agreed with James, he still felt the need to roll his eyes and say, "You always say things like that, Prongs."

James ignored the jibe, focusing his attention on Remus, instead. "She spent a lot of time on her looks for him, that's a bad sign. C'mon, Remus, let's move out!"

"I've an idea…let's stay here, instead! That way, I don't have to be trapped under here all day, when it's quite obvious you haven't showered recently."

Sirius heard a muffled noise, kind of like someone pushing someone else, but covered it up quite smoothly with some loud coughing.

"Ready?" He hadn't noticed Adriyana walking up to him, but apparently, she had, because there she was.

Sirius nodded, and Adriyana twined her fingers around his, sending a nervous glance Lily's way. The redhead was walking right behind them, looking apprehensive. "Don't worry, Lils. He likes you."

At this, Sirius thought he heard another sound, this vaguely like someone either kicking, or slamming their head into a wall.

"Sirius? You seem…distracted," Adriyana said.

"What? Oh, sorry, Agie. I'm fine."

"Great. I was kind of thinking we could explore a NEW part of Hogsmeade this time, you know…if you walk past the Hog's Head a bit, there's this cliff, with a gorgeous view, really romantic, and it's great for...I don't know…confessing something to someone?"

Shit. She knew. It didn't look like it, though, her face still held the same smile, not the accusing glare he'd expected. In fact, she rested her head on his shoulder as they walked, and whispered, "I've got something to tell you."

He just smiled, wishing he could pull out his Beater's bat on the guilt bubbling up inside him and just enjoy the bloody moment.

Lily scratched her arm, like she always did when she was nervous, as she got closer and closer to where she was supposed to be meeting Jeremy.

Please be there, Jeremy…don't make me look like an idiot, or I'll never stop liking James.

She smiled when she saw the back of his straggly blonde head as they got closer.

"Hi, Jeremy," she said, deciding that now that they were actually going out, she could drop the last name.

"Lily, hi!" he said, turning around. "Wow…you look great!"

"Thanks."

"What's wrong with your arm? Looks like you're trying to scratch it off."

Lily shook her head, smiling. "Er...my new perfume's kind of itchy. Nevermind that, though. Shall we go?"

He smiled back. "We shall."

There was a bit of an awkward moment, once they started walking, when Lily was wondering whether or not she was supposed to pick up his hand, or what. Agie wasn't making things any easier, either; her head nestled in Sirius shoulder, walking right in front of them.

"So, Lily…where do you want to go?" Jeremy asked her.

She smiled at him, putting the awkwardness behind her, though now feeling very lost as she stared into the hazel eyes that always seemed to remind her of James.

"Well, I heard Honeydukes is selling sweets that shock your mouth when you suck on them…"

He grinned. "Bet I can keep one in my mouth longer than you!"

"You're so on!" Lily called, as he started tearing down the hall, and she followed behind, laughing and wishing she had chosen different shoes.

Main Street in Hogsmeade was so crowded that James and Remus opted to take off the Invisibility Cloak, and James tucked it into his rucksack as Remus searched around for Jeremy and Lily.

"There!" Remus called, pointing to a park bench, where Lily and Jeremy were indeed sitting, each holding a bright yellow candy.

James motioned for Remus to duck into the foliage with him, moving close enough so that they could hear what Jeremy and Lily were saying.

"Ready?" Jeremy asked.

In response, Lily popped the candy into her mouth, grinning. Well, for a second at least, until she grabbed her jaw, in pain. "Owww," she moaned, the sweet still in her mouth.

Jeremy followed suit, popping his candy in his mouth and promptly howling in pain.

"Still gonna bea'chu!" Lily said, voice muffled by the candy and the obvious state of pain she was in.

"What is he DOING to her?" James asked, glaring angrily at Jeremy.

"Actually Prongs…I think it's the candy." Remus said. "It looks like those new sweets that give you a shock. I think they're trying to see who can last the longest without spitting it out."

"Oh," James said, watching Lily smile as her eyes teared up. After about a minute, Jeremy spit out his candy, grabbing his jaw.

"Ha! Lily wins!" James whispered.

"Thanks, James. I wasn't watching," said Remus, dryly.

Lily spit out her candy immediately. "Yesss!"

"Fine, you win. What do you want?" Jeremy asked. "How about a whole bag of these?" He held up his candy, now covered in spit, as well as dirt from falling on the ground.

Lily made a face. "No. I don't want something that shows everyone I won." Her eyes glinted mischievously. "I want something that shows people that YOU lost."

Jeremy raised his eyebrows.

"Carry me on your back around Hogsmeade!" Lily said, looking as if it was the best idea she'd ever had. James sure thought it was. Oh, how he would laugh if he wasn't spying on her.

Jeremy's eyebrows went higher, but he sighed. "Fine, get on."

"Really?" She asked.

"Why not? But I get to choose where we go next!"

Lily nodded vigorously, and James smiled. He knew there was an inner child in her somewhere! The he realized that it had been Jeremy, and not him, to bring it out, and he immediately stopped smiling. Stupid Jeremy, why should he get that privilege?

"Prongs?" Remus poked him. Hard. "They're leaving…and I will too, if you don't start doing something!"

James turned, to see Jeremy walking down the street, carrying Lily on his back, and attracting quite a few onlookers.

He climbed out of the bush, shrugging off the bad feelings and pulling out the Invisibility cloak again. "C'mon, Moony, let's follow them."

Sirius had been to this part of Hogsmeade before, all gloomy alleys and seedy shops; he'd been there many times, whenever the Marauders needed an illegal or rare ingredient for a Potion they were using for a prank, this is where they found it.

One thing he'd never expected, though, was to be here with Adriyana. She'd insisted that the fastest way to get to the romantic spot she'd been going on about was through here. He'd been reluctant to go, realizing she was going to say something that was going to affect their relationship in a BIG way.

And he couldn't let her do it. Because he didn't know how long this lie was going to last, but now that he'd found out what she'd asked was really THAT important to her, he was sure that she'd know the truth soon.

And she wouldn't like him for it. IN fact, she'd hate him, he was sure of it. He hoped, though, that maybe she'd hate him a little less if he didn't let her say or do anything too important, because he really loved Adriyana, even if he hadn't told her so yet. If anything important happened before he came clean, she'd never believe him, and she'd feel like an idiot…

He knew he was screwed for lying in the first place, he didn't know why he did it, but he really wished he never had.

He looked at Adriyana, who was so excited to say whatever it was that she was planning on saying that she was now walking about twenty feet ahead of him.

He sighed, feeling terrible. Then, he heard a jingling sound by his feet and looked down, seeing a haggard-looking man shaking a tatty old paper coffee cup with a handful of equally dirty coins at the bottom, causing the noise.

"Change, sir?" the man rasped, holding out the old cup.

"Change?" Sirius just sighed again. "I'm trying to, but it's harder than it looks."

Lily thought, as she sipped the Butterbeer Jeremy had bought her, that she should be having a fantastic time. Jeremy was extremely nice, clearly liked her very much, and had a great sense of humor; the person she'd been up until this year would have fallen for him in a second.

But all the "new" her could think about was how Jeremy wasn't James.

Jeremy interrupted her reverie. "Lily, what are you doing this summer?"

She smiled, realizing that while she was thinking, the two of them had lapsed into an awkward silence, and thanked Merlin she was out with a guy who was fantastic at striking up small talk. "Oh, I don't know. I haven't got anything planned yet, but I think my dad might want me to work in some shop in the Muggle town we live by, scooping ice cream or something of the like."

He nodded. "Quidditch world cup's this year. My family are all fanatics so I'll be in the States a good few weeks before the thing."

Bet James will be there, too. Lily smiled. "Sounds like fun. It's England vs. USA this year, right?"

He nodded. "Yeah, it's going to be one hell of a game. You're not going?"

"No…I would go with my friends, but Alice isn't allowed to go so far away, Amber refuses to fly on a Muggle plane, and Adriyana's on vacation all summer and can't get out of it. She's not happy."

Jeremy laughed. "All that really happens that far before the game is a lot of fighting and drinking. I'll get you some bloody teeth as a souvenir, if you want."

She rolled her eyes. " How romantic. How'd you know that's just what I've always wanted?"

He laughed harder. "Well, it's all part of my master plan to get you to like me. I let you ride on my back, buy you a drink, and offer you some stranger's teeth. It's a three-pronged attack, works every time."

Lily laughed, and tried not to let it show on her face that that the only word of that sentence she caught was "prongs."

Also, she decided that she might have finally cracked and gone insane. Why else would the air be swearing?

"What do you think, Sirius?" Adriyana asked him, as they looked over the cliff she'd been telling him about. "Pretty, huh?"

"Yeah, it sure is," he said. It was true, there was a really nice view, but it was the last thing on his mind at the moment.

In fact, all he was thinking was that he had to get away, before Adriyana did something she'd really regret doing later.

"Sirius, I've got to tell you something. I've been thinking about it a lot, too; since I recovered from the amnesia, but even more after out talk in the astronomy tower. I really think that…that I l—"

"Agie! I totally forgot! I have a detention today!" Great. More lies. "Merlin, it started half an hour ago! I'm really sorry! I have to go, NOW."

He planted a chaste kiss on her cheek, and ran off before she could stop him, leaving her standing there, a confused (and slightly desperate) look on her face.

"James. Their date's over. Can we go NOW?"

"No," James said, as if it should be obvious. "They still have to say goodbye. That's the single most important part of any date; everyone knows that."

"Fine. But don't forget, you owe me HUGE for this."

James shrugged, and turned his attention back to Lily and Jeremy.

"I had a lot of fun, Jeremy! Thanks so much!"

Just as Lily was planning to walk away, those stupid voices popped up in her head again.

Kiss him.

What? No! I don't kiss on the first date, ever since I saw "The Music Man!" at the high school by my house when I was twelve!

Fine, it's your choice. Kiss Jeremy, and you might like it...like him. Don't, and you'll start getting even more serious feelings for James. You know it'll happen if you don't, and you're alone...and he REALLY likes you. What have you got to lose?

And at that moment, Lily realized something. That half of her brain, the one telling her to kiss Jeremy, usually had to fight to get her to listen, but it ALWAYS ended up winning.

She looked at Jeremy, who was smiling that adorably shy smile. And for once, she decided to save her brain the trouble of fighting and just listen to it. She moved in closer, closing the space between them slowly.

It was a soft, tentative kiss, but a kiss nonetheless. It wiped the smile right off Jeremy's face, but...in a good way. He was just staring at her, shocked. Then, his face broke into a smile five times bigger than the first one.

Lily felt herself smiling, too. And even more surprisingly, she realized she was smiling because she wanted to, not to convince herself of anything.

Maybe...maybe she did like Jeremy.

Remus sighed, watching poor James' face as Lily kissed Jeremy, his friend looking more heartbroken than Remus had ever seen. A second later, James turned away, pulling Remus down the hallway behing him, and muttering dark things as soon as he was sure Lily couldn't hear. He whipped off the Invisibility Cloak so strongly that the hem of it smacked Remus in the face. James was too distracted to apologize, or even notice that it had happened.

"Prongs? I'm sorry…I know you didn't want to see that," Remus said consolingly.

"S'not your fault, Moony." He stormed off, Remus jogging to catch up, and it was only due to his wolf-enhanced senses that he heard the next part of James' sentence: "It's mine."

"How?" Remus asked.

But James kept walking, leaving Remus to shout, "Surely you don't believe in karma!" to an empty corridor.

A/N—It took me a while to write this one, mostly because I didn't have many ideas. I'm hoping to finish off their sixth year in the next few chapters, so the next two or three might be a little shorter, but hopefully still good.

Don't forget to review if you liked it! I love you guys, almost as much as I loved Stick Stickly when I was younger. Ah, nostalgia.