3.
As soon as Catherine got into the cab, away from Gil, she tried her best not to cry. In her mind, the last fifteen minutes were playing over and over again. Gil had kissed her. And she had kissed him back. There were so many thoughts running through her head. She loved Tony. But she'd always loved Gil. And now he'd kissed her. But Gil was with Sara. And she was with Tony. And that was the part where Catherine got confused. They were supposed to love other people, they were supposed to kiss other people. Not each other. Perhaps it was the alcohol, she wasn't sure. All she knew was that she was confused as hell. And that she wasn't having a clue of what she was supposed to do.
Catherine didn't realise she was heading for Tony's house until she was actually in front of it. Instead of telling the cabdriver to head for her own house, she just paid him and walked to the front door of Tony's house. She searched for the key in her purse, and opened the door as quietly as possible. She threw out her heels, hung up her coat and put her purse on the couch. Catherine walked upstairs to the bathroom, putting on the lights and locking its door automatically. She got a little frightened when she looked at herself in the mirror. Her porcelain skin looked whiter than usual, as if she'd just seen a ghost. Her blue eyes were dark and dull. She looked terrible. She slowly changed from her dress to her nighty. Catherine wanted to get Gil out of her mind desperately, but it simple wasn't happening.
When Catherine walked into the bedroom, she could her the soft snores coming out of the bed. It felt somewhat comforting to hear them; they were familiar. Her body slid into bed, feeling the warmth of Tony's body next to her. She desperately tried to focus her on him instead of Gil, but again, it wasn't happening. She prayed Tony would stay asleep, but he didn't. He turned around to face her and opened his eyes. He yawned before saying: "Hey! Had a good time?"
All Catherine could do was nod and smile. Tony's hand reached out and caressed her cheek with his thumb before leaning in and kissing her. "Goodnight, honey." "Goodnight, Tony."
Catherine knew her words were nothing more than soft whispers, but Tony was half asleep anyway. She turned her head so she was facing the wall instead of Tony. She was thinking. Thinking about Gil. Tony. Sara. Herself. She was thinking about love. And the most stupid thing was that Gil was on her mind the entire time until she finally fell asleep.
*
Gil woke up early that next morning. He'd been sleeping horrible. After every hour he woke up again, the image of Catherine clearly in his vision every single time. His actions from the night before had been stupid. Incredibly stupid. The first thing Gil wanted to do that day, was talk to Catherine. He needed to see and talk to her. A little voice in the back of his head said that he had to go see Sara as well. He tried to push that away though, even though he knew that talking to Sara was one of the most important things he had to do.
Catherine woke up that same morning from someone caressing her face. When her eyes fluttered open, she saw it was Tony, sitting on her side of the bed, fully-dressed and just looking at her. "Hey sleepy head, I'm glad you're awake."
Tony talked softly and never stopped caressing her skin. Catherine felt a slight headache coming up, and the events of the night before were still living in her head. She tried to push them away though, and concentrate on the gorgeous man sitting next to her. She yawned and said: "Hey. You're already dressed."
Tony nodded and smiled. "Yeah. It's almost ten, I have that meeting with the chief, remember?" Catherine chuckled and said: "Right." She sat up so she was at the same level as Tony was and said: "I guess I'll see you tonight then?" Tony shrugged and said: "I hope that meeting won't take very long, but I'm not sure. I'll call you, okay?" Catherine nodded.
Tony lend in and kissed her. His lips felt so comforting, so warm and so good. Yet, they felt strange to Catherine. After he broke the kiss, Tony said: "I'm going, I'll call you." Catherine smiled, and Tony got up. "I love you." Tony's words sounded so sincere, and Catherine couldn't do anything but saying: "I love you too." As soon as he'd left the bedroom though, tears felt down Catherine's cheek. She hated Gil for doing what he'd done the night before. But most of all, she hated herself for doubting her feelings for Tony after one simple kiss from Gil.
About an hour later, Catherine was searching through Tony's fridge, trying to find some kind of breakfast she liked. Unfortunately, all he seemed to have were cereals, milk and smelly sausages. She could tell he'd been spending more time at her place that at his own. Catherine sighed; she figured she would go pick up breakfast somewhere else.
*
As soon as Gil walked into the small diner he and Catherine used to have breakfast so often after shift, he spotted the strawberry blonde in front of the counter. He could recognize that back from miles away. He wasn't sure what to do; he'd wanted to call Catherine to see her, but he hadn't thought he would see her that soon, without any preparation. He was not sure how Catherine would react towards him. He knew she loved Tony. But she hád kissed him back. And he had felt the way her body had reacted to him; that wasn't a reaction from a woman who didn't care about a man. He walked up to her and put his hand on her shoulder when he said: "Hey, Cath."
Catherine got a scare from the sudden hand on her shoulder, but managed to relax as soon as she heard the voice behind her. She couldn't prevent herself from hissing: "Jesus, Gil, don't do that again!"
Grissom smiled a little sheepishly when he said: "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you. Picking up breakfast?"
Catherine nodded. "Yeah, there was nothing in the fridge so I decided to just pick up something. So are you, aren't you?"
Gil nodded. For a split moment, everything seemed like it used to be; they felt comfortable, normal, as if nothing had happened. There was silence for a moment while Catherine waited for her food, until Catherine started to talk. "I… I guess… I have to go. I have to go do stuff at home and I have to work later and I have so much to do and…" Catherine knew she was rambling.
Gil noticed that too and said: "Catherine, relax. You're rambling."
"I know." At that moment, Catherine's food came and she wanted to get out of the diner as soon as possible. She didn't know what to do or what to see, and she didn't even dare to look into Gil's eyes. He made her look though when he grabbed her hand and said: "Cath… Can we have breakfast? Please. We need to talk."
"I know. I.. I just don't really want to."
"But we should. Please, I.. I won't do anything, I just.. We need to talk."
Catherine could tell Gil was desperate. And she could see in his eyes he was sincere. And beside that, she knew she would never be able to say no to the man that was standing in front of her. She simply couldn't. "Okay," she softly said, "we have breakfast. My place?"
Note: That was it for now, hope you enjoyed it. Sorry for the lack of conversation in this chapter, just really felt like I should explain feelings before I could continue with a good conversation. Nevertheless, I hope you liked it! I would really appreciate it if you'd let me know if you did, so please hit that button.. xx.