Aleksandra
Andy and Alison came back. I gave Alison a smirk and she just shook her head. They placed the sodas on the table and she walked over to her seat again. John sat in between Andy and Claire watching as she pulled things from her bag. "What's in there?" Bender asked.
"Guess," Claire said pulling out a wooden stand. I don't know what it's called, but it holds up bento boxes. Yum, sushi's good. She looked to him. "Where's you lunch?"
Bender smirked. "Your wearing it." For some reason that bothered me, I mean really bothered me. Its like I'd rather he say that to me. What the fuck am I on?
Claire rolled her eyes, "Your nauseating."
Bender reached forward and tossed a soda to Alison, who caught it without looking up from the back on her record. Claire was pouring soy sauce into a little bowl when Bender asked, "What's that?" The cover to her bento box was open revealing the sushi.
"Its sushi," she said.
"Sue-she?" John asked with a disgusted face.
Claire laughed. "Ya, its rice, raw fish, and seaweed." Everyone, but Alison and myself were giving her strange looks.
"Hey Claire," I said drawing her attention. "You ever have zose little octopuz zingz? I can't remember ze name but you get vhat I'm talking about?"
Claire smiled and nodded. "Ya, they're good aren't they."
I nodded and smiled. "Yup." They looked to me now, "Vhat?" I asked. "Zushi's good."
Bender looked between us. "Neither of you will except a guy's tongue in your mouth but you eat that?"
"Can I eat?" Claire asked clearly annoyed.
"I don't know," John said. "Give it a try."
I looked to Andy to see him pulling things out his bag. First a huge bag of chips, then 3, count 'em 1... 2... 3!!! sandwiches, a BAG of cookies, and a large carton of milk. He went to put it down, but there was more?! He pulled out an apple, and a banana. Oh my god, I just cant watch this. I looked to Alison to see her open her can of soda, which spilled over the edges, but she sucked that up. She took out her sandwich and threw away whatever meat was inside in disgust. She opened up pixi-stix and started pouring them onto her sandwich and then into her soda. I smiled as she pulled out the cereal in which she smashed into her sandwich. Everyone turned at the crunching sound. She didn't noticed everyone was watching her till she took a long bite and chewed loudly. That was when they slowly turned away.
John got up and got a soda before bringing it to me, not that I noticed I was pulling my 'lunch' from my bag. My lunch consisted of cinnamon, brown-sugar Pop-Tarts and gummy worms. I could only afford the gummy worms so I lifted the Pop-Tarts. "Hey," I said when I saw him sit in front of me. He gave me the soda. "Zanks."
"That's it?" John asked.
I nodded. "Ja." I opened the pack of gummy worms and offered him some. "Vant zome?" I asked softly.
Bender smiled softly to me. "Thanks Aleksandra." He took a few and was about to go pester Brian but I grabbed him hand.
"You don't 'ave to call me Aleksandra, you can juzt call me Alex or go back to callin' me Kale." I said not looking at him.
Bender shrugged. "I like Aleksandra better." He took a step back and then said, "Get any food on my scarf and I'll kill you." To anyone else it would seam like a threat, but to me it was a joke. He then left to pester Brian grabbing a soda for him along the way. I smiled softly fiddling with the strings of the scarf that was now around my neck, I won't tell anyone this, but I like my full name better than just Alex. To me, Alex means nothing as important as Aleksandra. I pulled out a gummy worm, slowly chewing it and watched Bender sit besides Brian, pulling away his lunch and placing the soda in front of him. "What are we having today?" he asked.
"Just your standard regular lunch I guess," Brian said.
John reached into the bag and pulled out a thermos, "Milk?"
"Soup," Brian corrected. Bender nodded and went into the bag again. Brian reached to the bag but Bender just slapped his hand away. John pulled out a carton, too far away for me to see but I think its - "Ah that's Apple Juice." Brian said. Hey, I was gonna say that!
Bender glared at him. "I can read." He pulled out another item, apparently the last. "PB&J with the crusts cut off, well Brian this is a very nutritious lunch, all the food groups are represented. Did your mom marry Mr. Rogers?"
"Uh no, she married Mr. Johnson," Brian said. Awe, Brian and his little virgin mind is so cute!!!
"Ahhh," Bender said as Clair and Andy smiled at each other while he got up. "Here's my impression of life at Big Bri's house," he said once he'd reached the table I was at. "Son!" he said in a loud annoyingly nice.
"Yea Dad?" he said impersonating Brian's voice before he hit puberty.
"How was your day, pal?
"Great Dad! How's yours!?
"Super. Say son, how'd you like to go fishing this weekend?
"Great Dad, but I've got homework to do!
"That's all right! You can do it in the boat!" I looked around everyone was watching and even Brian and Alison were smiling.
"Gee!" John said before switching to Brian's 'father's' voice. "Dear, isn't our son swell?
"Yes Dear, isn't life swell?" he said in a woman's voice. Bender pretended to be a wife kissing a husband on the cheek and a husband returning the gesture. And then the husband punched the wife in the face causing me to flinch.
"Alright, what about your family?" Andy asked.
"Oh mine?" Bender asked.
"Ya," Andy said.
"That's real easy." He pointed forward and made his voice get really deep. "Stupid, worthless, no-good, God damned, freeloading, son-of-a-bitch, retarded, bigmouth, know-it-all, asshole, jerk!" he said before switching over to the high voice of his mother, his arms crossing. "You forgot ugly, lazy, and disrespectful-" He quickly moved his hand back as if to slap his mother. "Shut up bitch! Go fix me a turkey pot pie!" His voice went to normal. "What about you Dad?"
"Fuck you!" His voice became deep again.
"No Dad, what about you?
"Fuck you!
"No Dad, what about you!?
"Fuck you!" he yelled as he pretended to be his father hitting him. I didn't watch. Even though it was just an act, I knew it was true. To me it was like seeing it actually happen to him and that broke my heart. I don't want anyone to turn out like I did. To go through what I have, see what I've seen, and ... done, what I've had to do.
"Is that for real?" Brian asked breaking the silence. I looked between the two before looking at my hands, tears welling up in my eyes. It felt like he was asking me the question rather than John Bender.
"You wanna come over sometime?" Bender asked with a small, steady glare.
"That's bullshit. It's all part of your image, I don't believe a word of it," Andy said.
"You don't believe me?" Bender asked looking hurt. I quickly looked up and glared at Andy. He knows what my life was like and he doesn't think that John's is anywhere near mine?
"No."
"No?"
"Did I stutter?"
John walked over to him and pulled up his shirt sleeve. I only got a glance of it, but I saw a large burn circle. "You believe this?" he asked. "That's about the size of a cigar." Andy looked away and Bender growled. "Do I stutter? See, this is what I get in my house when you spill paint in the garage." He stepped back, pulling down his sleeve, before holding up his hands. "See, I don't think I need to sit with you fucking dildos anymore." I flinched when he said that even though it wasn't directed at me. I listened as he walked behind me and the growl in anger causing me to jump and a few tears to escape. I heard him climb the side of the metal stairs before loudly sitting down. Nobody, moved or made a sound. Slowly, and without anyone noticing, I stood up and went to Bender. I walked up the stairs, rather than climbing the side of them and sat besides him, my legs dangling over the edge just like his. "What do you want Kale?" he growled.
"You know zat Andy doezn't get it, don't you?" I asked softly. He scoffed but I just continued. "He doezn't get vhat it's like to be hated by your family. To be 'it, pushed down ztairs, and through vindows by ze people zat are meant to protect you." I felt him turn to look at me, but I just kept staring at the ground below us, talking. "He doezn't know vhat it's like to be put down all ze time. To dread returning home becauze you know zey're vaiting, to vish zey'd take it too far and you'll juzt die." Tears slipped down my cheeks and I roughly brushed them away, along with the concealer over my face. I knew I wiped it away and I didn't care, I wanted John to know he wasn't alone in this, not anymore. I smiled softly. "Did you know zat Andy's dad knows vhat my vater does to me und doesn't do anyzing about it? Did you know zat Vernon knows und juzt adds to my pain by making zat call every-time?" The tears came faster now. "Do you know how much-how much I vish zat I was never born in the first place? Or that I vould just die?" The second question came in a whisper. "I'm terrivied to go home, but I have to. Running avay izn't an option in my house. I'm terrivied to vake up each morning und I just hope to gott zat he'd juzt kill me already but zen I just don't vant to give him the zatizvaction of knowing he did it. I vish to gott if I could have ze strength zey did." I smiled sadly to John. "Your not alone."
I then quickly wiped away my tears and before he could say anything, I think he was in shock, I slipped through the bottom bar and fell onto the floor in a crouch. "Fuck Kale!" Bender said from above me. I looked up and smiled, to see him smiling at me. I turned to the others to see them staring wide-eyed. I smiled to them and bowed, knowing I was too far away for them to see the bruises on my face.
---
I stood behind John as we waited for Vernon to leave our view. We were going to go to his locker for a reason I didn't know. Behind us stood the others, waiting for the signal. They didn't have to follow us, I didn't even have to follow him. But, I guess we all just need to leave that room. Bender opened the door fully and we all walked out and down the hall towards his locker. Once we were far enough away the questions started. I'd rather not talk about them because they're annoying/boring as hell. Anyways we just kept going till we came to his locker. On it were the words, 'Open this locker' there was an arrow pointing to his locker, 'and Die Fag!!!'. I smirked, "Nize."
John smiled at me and in put his combo. He held it in a way so I could see it perfectly. 27, 14, 32. Well that's good for future knowledge. He opened the locker and a guillotine fell, chopping off the tip of his old ratty red converse, though he didn't seam to care.
"Your such a slob," Andy said.
"My maid's on vacation," Bender said jokingly. He pulled out a large brown paper-bag from the top compartment, the part that said 'Open this locker' and was the start of the arrow. He pulled a smaller paper-bag out of that one, and then another out of that one. All three things of paper-bags were shoved into his locker. And there in his hand, well now in his pocket, was marijuana. He closed the locker and began to walk away.
"Its drugs!" Brian said shocked.
Andy glared. "Put it back Bender."
I rolled my eyes. "If you remember Andy you azked ze zame thing vhen he took the screwz." I shook my head. "Not gonna happen." I followed Bender as Brian tried to grasp John having marijuana. I looked to John and asked, "Zis vhat ve came for?"
He nodded. "Ya, got a problem Aleksandra?" he asked with a smirk.
I smiled and held up my hands. "Nein, it's a good reazon." I glanced back to the others, just in time to see Alison take Bender's lock to his locker. I smirked and turned around before laughing softy. John gave me a look but didn't say anything about it.
Andy walked up besides him on the opposite side. "We'll cross through the lab, and then we'll double back." John said after Andy asked him, quite rudely I might add, how we were going to get back.
"You better be right if Vernon cuts us off its your fault, asshole." Andy growled as we turned to the left.
I stopped at the corner and waited for them to pass so I can stand by Alison. "So why'd you take the lock?"
Alison shrugged. "Cuz I wanted it." I laughed softly and wrapped my arm around hers. Well, that's Alison for you. She gave me a look, but let my arm stay there as long as no one looked back, then she'd probably fling me across the hall. She then stopped and looked to me. "You like Bender."
My face heated up, I think I was blushing, ya I probably was. I slipped my arm from hers and muttered, "Zhut up Alison." I didn't bother lying to her, she was like a fucking human lie detector. But at the same time I wasn't going to admit something I wasn't even sure about. I mean. I guess I liked him in more than a friend type way, but I wouldn't know what that was. I've never remotely felt the same way I feel around John Bender with anyone else. With anyone else its just the normal crap, I mean with Alison, Carl, and slowly the others of our little detention group it was strange but something I've felt when I was younger and in Germany. That was the friend type of thing, but with Bender. With him there's little butterflies fluttering in my stomach, only at times rather than butterflies its rabid bats trying to claw their way out. I feel connected because of the pain we're both caused by our parents, the same pain that makes us what we are and I guess first attracted me to him. I've liked him since I met him, maybe not in the way it is now but like with Alison and Carl. He's always been pretty nice to me, nicer than any of the others he's around. Damn it! I sound so fucking sappy. Screw this! I turned to Alison and muttered, "I hate you."
Then all of a sudden the others bolted forward, I looked down the hall connecting to ours and saw Vernon walking down it. My eyes widened and I quickly looked to them and then back, just in time to see him turn the corner heading the same way as them. Like Alison I leaned against the yellow lockers, waiting for the others to get back. When John passed me, he grabbed my wrist pulling me along to run with him. Alison, followed us, I could tell because I counted footfalls. We continued running, mostly following Bender who wouldn't let go of my wrist yet. As we came to a dead end ready to turn a corner Vernon was there walking down the hall away from us. We all skid to a stop, Brian and myself almost falling over, and then run in the same direction we came from. John still not letting go of me, like he doesn't want to loose me. See I'm confused. ... You know what I'm gonna ponder later because we just turned another corner and Vernon is at the end drinking some fucking water! Bender pulled me along as we, again, went the way we came. We turned to cut through the English hall before Bender brought me down a set of stairs, the others following.
We ran down the hall until we came to the cross hall. Claire, Brian, and Andy making a move to go right. "Wait," John said. "Wait, hold it." They stopped. "We have to go through the cafeteria." He gestured down the hall with the hand he wasn't using to hold onto my wrist. I pulled my wrist away slightly, but only enough so we held hands and his fingers were the ones to interlock first, I swear on my life.
"No, the activities hall," Andy said.
"Hey man, you don't know what you're talking about," Bender tried to argue.
"No, you don't know what your talking about." Andy said. Alison made a loud noise, sort of like a squeal, it said, 'let's hurry the fuck up'. "Now we're through listening to you, we're going this way. You can do what you want, mother-head." He then bolted down the hall, followed by Brian whom had grabbed Claire's hand to drag her along. "Come on!" Andy said knowing that Alison and myself weren't following. Alison turned to us and walked backwards stomping her feet trying to get us to follow. After a moment I did, making John follow me for a change, even though it lasted a second because he was in front of me again.
Bender pulled me into the lead with him again. If they were going to go the wrong way, we might as well lead them there. Well, Bender might as well seeing as A) I'm still kind of new here and B) he's pulling me along. We ran down the stairs and turned to run down the second set, damn, I swear this school's tilted. We kept running down the hall, and then turned left to only see that, just like Bender anticipated. That hall was going to be blocked off by fucking grates. Bender released my hand only to slam his against the grates.
"Shit," Andy growled.
"Great idea, jerk-off," Bender growled as I stopped besides him, Brian on the other side still holding Claire's hand.
"Fuck you," Andy growled.
"Fuck you!" Claire yelled at Andy. "Why didn't you listen to Bender?"
"We're dead," Brian said stating the obvious.
John groaned softly and looked to me. "No," he said to the others staring right at me. "Just me." He took his weed out of his pocket and shoved it down the front of Brian's pants. "Get back to the library, and keep my weed on ya." He ran down the hall. We watched him for a moment before I bolted after him.
"Alex!" Brian called after me.
I didn't stop and just kept following John. I turned the corner only to be thrust into the wall by the same person I was following. His hands held me against the wall by my forearms. "Aleksandra go back, go the fuck back." he said.
I shook my head. "I can't let you do thiz alone."
"And I can't let Vernon call your father!" He growled tightening his grip as much as he dared. "I can't let your dad hurt you damn it!" He placed his hand against my cheek. "Just let me do this Aleksandra, you have to. I can't ... I can't let your dad do to you what mine does to me anymore." I flinched and looked away. "Please Aleksandra, please." Slowly I nodded, tears threatening to spill. John moved his hands to grab his scarf around my neck, he used the scarf to pull me forward and he kissed me. It was ... well the only way I can describe it is by calling it earth shattering. It was my first real kiss. I plan on cherishing it forever just like Cassie and Emily did with their first kisses. Oh how I would love to tell them about mine like they told me about theirs. He released me and gave me a quick kiss on the forehead. "Later Kale," he said jokingly before running down the hall bursting into song.
I stood still for a moment before running down the hall to join the others, who had waited for me. I followed the others hoping that John Bender would be okay, and I knew he would. We were silent, other than our echoing footsteps and the sound of someone, John, singing, "I wanna be an Airborne Ranger!"