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Wing Men

Chapter 5 – Liabilities

Sheppard had gone and updated his team and now found himself mindlessly wandering back to infirmary. He strolled in past the rows of beds in the main infirmary area, briefly stopping by Collin's bed to get an update from a nurse who was changing his IV. Spotting Carson wandering out of his office carrying his tablet he quickly darted after the man, trailing him in silence back to a cubicle with the curtain drawn shut around it.

As Beckett disappeared behind them Sheppard followed him, "Well? What have you found?"

Beckett's head snapped up from whatever had been keeping him so engrossed on his tablet, "Oh, colonel. Give me another moment or two and I'll be able to tell ye," he said, putting his tablet aside as he moved up to the bed where Rodney was currently out cold, stripped to the waist.

"Yikes! What are you doing here? You have Rodney dressed up like a cross between a porcupine and a Christmas tree," Sheppard interjected, eyes widening at the dozens of short needles that were stuck into his friend's injured appendage, a wire attached to the end of each one. His eyes followed the wires down to where they gathered into a thick coil, eventually connecting to some sort of machine that had a digitalized image of an arm on it.

"Ach, I know it looks bad lad, but we aren't torturing the lad. Ye can see why I put him out though. The poor lad would have a panic fit if he saw himself trussed up like this. It's a new diagnostic tool I've been toying with, an Ancient design. McKay's blue shirts actually brought it down to me, found it in an older lab."

"Uh…knowing our track record of untested Ancient technology and the colossal disasters they seem to generate are you sure it's such a hot idea to be using McKay as a guinea pig?" Sheppard asked, a tinge of concern in his voice.

"It's perfectly safe colonel, I've been using it for a few weeks with my patients now with no problems," he said as he fiddled with a few of the needles and wires and then turned his attention to the screen of the machine they were attached to.

"What are all the needles for?"

"We use them for nerve mapping. We send a very low grade electrical current through each one and this machine is capable of seeing which nerves conduct the charge. Think of yer nerves like a huge web that run throughout yer body, all interconnected. The current gets passed through each one, the signal gradually getting weaker as the signal travels a further distance."

"So how will that help you with McKay's case?"

"I'll show ye," he said, pressing a button on the machine's console. There was a low grade humming from the machine and then it cut out suddenly. Sheppard watched McKay, there was no sign of distress on the man's face but his arm did twitch as the muscles contracted.

Beckett was engrossed in the data displayed on the screen. Sheppard didn't quite know what he was seeing, but he could see the faint shape of an arm and shoulder. Overlaid on that was a web-looking something or other in varying shades of blue.

Carson scrunched his eyebrows and tapped a few buttons on the keyboard, prompting the screen to zoom into an area around the shoulder joint, "See this," he asked, tapping one sector of the screen.

"The jumble of colors?"

"Aye, here," he said, tapping the area on the screen again.

"I see that the web-looking thing is red instead of blue like everything else? That what we're talking about here?"

"Aye, that's a bundle of nerves that didn't react like they should've to that electrical impulse. Probably caused by Rodney not manipulating his shoulder into the joint correctly. Using a damnable door the dolt. Could he have gotten any more medieval?"

"So there is nerve damage? Are we talking permanent here?"

"Ach, I'm going to have to manually dislocate the shoulder, then go in surgically and move the bundle of nerves so they won't be caught when I put the shoulder back into place again. It's pinched in the joint right now"

"That doesn't sound fun…"

"Aye, it won't be for Rodney. I'll have to discuss it with him when I wake him up. I'll be doing that now that I'm sure that we are looking at nerve involvement."

"So when will you do the surgery?"

"Assuming McKay gives his permission for us to go ahead with it? I would do it immediately. The longer we wait the larger the chance that the nerve will retain some permanent damage."

"What do you mean assuming Mckay gives the go ahead? That doesn't normally stop you…you're always going on about how you have the needles and your judgment supersedes anyone else's in medical situations."

"That's in life-threatening situations. Rodney would still recover some function in the arm without this surgery; I won't force it on him."

"You've never let McKay's stubbornness get in your way before."

Carson's expression dipped a bit, "I'm the one that screwed this up last time he was in for that shoulder. He had an addition three weeks of recovery, of pain, of frustration, because of a mistake I made. I'll not be forcing that sort of decision on him again; McKay has every right to not trust me with this. It's the lad's decision."

Sheppard gave Carson a quizzical look, "Can he go through the gate without the surgery assuming he lets it recover."

Beckett sat down on his stool and shook his head, "No, he'd be a medical liability. He'd be restricted to base-only status if he doesn't go through with this surgery."

"Then he'll have the surgery," Sheppard said confidently.

"Colonel, I know ye guys are close, but this is Rodney's decision and he seemed pretty set against any surgical involvement…"

"Beckett, just wake him up, lay out the options for him. If he says no, I'll talk to him. He'll come around."

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Sheppard stalked into McKay's lab where he knew he would find the man, "Beckett tells me you refused the surgery and signed yourself out of his care against medical advice. He says you shouldn't even be off the pain meds yet."

Rodney gaped at him for a moment, not used to his friend barging in like this and immediately taking off on a tirade. Usually they got a few minutes of casual talking in before Sheppard dove into the real reason behind such late night visits when something was bothering him. He finished looking at Sheppard and went back to typing on his computer with his one available hand, "Beckett did his job, he checked out my shoulder, gave me the facts, and I made the decision that I thought was best."

"Want to tell me how choosing the option that will condemn you to never being allowed to go through the gate is best for anyone?" Sheppard snarled, "Did your common sense decide to take a vacation in the past few days? First, you get an injury, which I suspect happened yesterday when you called me up and then made up that stupid excuse about getting almost locked in the lab. Then, instead of seeking treatment, you decide to take care of it yourself, which may I add, is what put you in the position of needing this surgery. You lie to me about being ok to go through the gate, and it takes you being in mortal agony and screaming before you admit you're hurt. And then, then, no, that's not enough. After Carson has made a plan to undo this whole latest fuck-up of yours, you tell him that you don't want any of it. Did I miss anything?"

McKay continued typing, perhaps believing that if he kept himself engrossed in something else then he wouldn't have to fully participate in this discussion, "It doesn't matter what I did. The results would've been the same; I am not having the surgery. John, my answer is no. I've been through a recovery that was half of what Beckett is proposing now, and it sucked. I was in pain, I couldn't work, I laid there and did nothing," he finally stopped typing and looked up from the screen, "Do you know what it's like to feel useless?"

Sheppard's voice softened a bit, "Yeah, McKay, I do. Every time you are pulling a genius idea out of that brilliant mind of yours when we're in a crisis. My job to stand there and shoot at anything that might pose a threat to you. I don't know what you're doing or how you're doing it. All I know is that you can do it and all I am capable of doing is to watch and make sure to keep you safe while you save us. Who am I supposed to put that faith in if you're permanently grounded? Who am I supposed to trust if we're off world in need of your brains and you're stuck here in your lab?"

"I'll get better…I did before. My arm was one hundred percent after a lengthy recovery back on earth. I'm just gonna stick around the city for awhile, work on the backlog of projects I have sitting around, and in a few weeks it'll be fine," he said, again returning his attention to the latest schematics the scientists had sent to him for power output for the city.

"McKay! You are not listening. Beckett's saying nerve involvement. You don't spontaneously recover from that, you get permanent damage!"

"My answer's no Sheppard. I'm sorry if that doesn't sit well with you." McKay said, still not even bothering to look up from his report.

"Fuck it all Rodney! You are so obstinate. No, it doesn't sit well with me! And it's not going to."Fed up with his friend ignoring this very important conversation he was around Rodney's desk in three long strides and slammed the lid on the laptop. "Feel like listening to me now, maybe?"

"Sheppard! What is your problem?" McKay shouted this time.

Rodney tried to pry the laptop back open but the colonel pressed his weight down on the hand that was still on the lid, blocking McKay's attempt. "My problem is a teammate of mine is making a stupid decision and won't listen to reason."

"I'm not having the surgery Sheppard," Rodney hissed venomously, "I'll be fine without it."

"Ok, let's speak hypothetically. Let's assume that you don't have the surgery, and get permanently grounded. You think the city is any place for a gimp? You think the city's even safe for a permanently handicapped person?"

"Sheppard, even assuming I don't get back to top form, I am well capable of protecting myself. I've done fine in all of the conflicts we've made it through, including Genii and wraith invasions. I'll be fine."

"Ok, let's play pretend for a moment," Sheppard interjected, hauling McKay to his feet and pulling him away from the chair he had been occupying. He unbuckled his friend's sling and watched it fall to the ground.

McKay opened his mouth to protest but John cut him off, "This is you in top form assuming that Beckett is right. He says you'll hardly recover any strength in that arm. I'll be the enemy soldier. Defend yourself Rodney," he said, lightly shoving the man backward. "What do you do in this situation?"

"John! This is not funny! I'm in pain here and you're playing games and roughing me up! Wait till Beckett hears about this."

"You think an enemy soldier or a starving wraith is going to listen to your banter? You're right, we do get invasions and we'll probably get more attempted ones in the future. You need to be able to defend yourself. I need to be able to trust that you can look after yourself if I can't be there."

"I never fight hand to hand! That's what a gun's for."

"Fine, have a gun Rodney," Sheppard said, sliding his down along the desk to rest right next to Rodney. Rodney narrowed his eyes but moved his left hand to pick it up and return it to Sheppard and tell him to stop screwing around.

Before his hand had closed on the handle Sheppard was behind him, pinning that arm behind his back tightly, "Now I've got you partially restrained. How do you defend yourself? A Genii is trying to take you prisoner again, a wraith is preparing to feed on you," he whispered in Rodney's ear even as the man struggled to free himself.

Sheppard was careful to move with Rodney as he struggled and keep the grip on his arm just loose enough that he didn't jostle his injured shoulder. He heard Rodney wince as the scientist slowly moved his right hand down toward the gun. He managed to get the gun off the table before he let out a pained hiss of air and the gun clattered back to the table.

Sheppard immediately released Rodney and backed off, bending over to pick up the sling as Rodney collapsed back into his chair, cradling his injured arm against his chest in a pose that Sheppard had seen far too much of in the past few days. He flinched as Sheppard came up toward him.

"Easy, I'm done. Here's your sling," he said, holding it out. Rodney didn't say anything but allowed John to help him get his arm re-secured in the sling. Having finished that, Sheppard retrieved a rolling chair from another desk and pulled it up next to Rodney.

Rodney just sat there for a moment or two, flexing his fingers as best he could which wasn't very far. He still couldn't make a fist. His grip had been too weak to even get a gun off the table and into a firing position, "…I'm a liability like this, aren't I?"

"If you stay like this, if you don't have the surgery? Yeah. I'd worry about you every time you were out alone," Sheppard said softly.

"Last time…the recovery was so long. It hurt. And Beckett…he said that we probably didn't move rigorously enough with the physical therapy and then I had to start over. This sounds a lot more complicated than that. He's talking this surgery now to fix the nerve, and then once the swelling goes down in a few weeks or so, he wants to do the surgery to tighten the ligaments. That's a lot of surgery; it's a long recovery time."

"McKay, we've all been through this process, we get hurt, Beckett fixes us up, makes us take some time off, and then we go back through the gate. That's life in the Pegasus galaxy."

"It's going to be a long recovery. Not days, even weeks. He's talking months until I can go through the gate again or work without restriction. How am I supposed to do that?" McKay asked, looking up to meet Sheppard's gaze.

"You aren't expected to. That's what teammates, friends are for. You won't be alone in this McKay."

"You guys would help me?" McKay asked, still flexing his fingers weakly.

"McKay, that's a given. That's what friends do for one another; we take care of each other."

"…Ok. I'll do it."

Sheppard said a silent thank you, "Ok. Let's go see Beckett."

"Right now? Can't we wait at least till morning? I just got out of there two hours ago. It'd be nice to have one night more of freedom before I surrender to the Scot's grasp for god knows how long."

Sheppard shook his head, "Beckett said time was a factor. The sooner the better. Tell you what bud," he said, lowering his hand to help haul McKay up from his chair to a standing position, "We'll do a quick trip to the mess. I surveyed the food earlier; they have what looks like cookies made with real chocolate. Or at the very least a very convincing substitute. We can at least get some real grub in you before you go back to infirmary food. I won't tell Beckett about the detour if you won't," he said with a mischievous grin on his face.

"Alright, I suppose that's the best I am going to get," McKay said, taking Sheppard's hand and climbing to his feet, "And coffee. I want a cup or two of that too. Beckett is always clamoring that my caffeine intake is too high."

"Ok McKay, and a cup of coffee too," he added.

"Just out of curiosity, was gun loaded when you gave it to me?"

"McKay," Sheppard said as the pair left the lab, "I wouldn't trust you to hit a barn from ten feet with any gun, let alone trust you to point the thing at me without somehow maiming me. Of course not, it was empty."

"Hey! I object to you thinking I can't shoot, I went through the training for it just like everyone else."

"Yeah, and you almost shot your instructor's head off."

"He didn't tell me it was loaded! I was just trying to look at the inner mechanisms of it and it went off, it wasn't my fault!"

"Rodney, I'll leave the electronic gizmos to you; you leave the shooting to me. We'll hopefully both stay alive that way."

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