A/N:
Pronounced [sheh-REYSH-oy]
Buckle up, sweet peas, it's gonna be a doozy
TRIGGER WARNING
some gore
PRESENTS
fluff, fluff, family fluff
(/≧▽≦)/
The feast may have been late, but it went without a hitch, though Talla could have gone her whole life without seeing what the gruesome fate was for some of these admittedly cute livestock the Lawquanes raised.
For her personally, it was a whole different experience buying an already dead animal carcass from a market that was ready to be cooked as opposed to watching the poor creature's life be cruelly cut short before her eyes - LITERALLY! When the Bad Batch camped out on a planet, Talla found herself gravitating more towards gathering firewood with Wrecker than watching Hunter and Crosshair hunt and slay an animal to be roasted over their campfire, which Tech would prepare at the campsite knowing a poor, unsuspecting creature would face such a fiery fate.
This and the fact that Talla saw people made hides of certain animals into decorative and disturbing rugs, well, during the meal she found much difficulty swallowing the savory and unfortunately DELICIOUS roasted nuna she'd watched Suu chop the head off of, scampering away before getting to see the squeamish gutting process.
After the Battle for Kamino, Talla didn't actually see much of the bodies for the hundreds of fallen soldiers, and upon later research of the city's schematics learned that the Bad Batch had taken a few shortcuts to ensure not running into too many regs when quietly making their unfortunately intercepted escape. So at this point only having been in the war three and half months, the Agent had yet to personally witness firsthand a bloody death of any organic being, Silva and V'hiina also being the only instances where the Bad Batch had worked with other small groups, and there were no troop fatalities. But by the statistical reports and news articles she tended to skim through, Talla knew it was only a matter of time before another huge part of her diminishing innocence would be taken, but hoped it'd be pushed off as long as possible.
She may have been trained for fighting in the war, but as learned long ago the Kaminoans had not prepared Talla for how to deal with much else. Watching bloody fight scenes in holos frustratingly made her uneasy, when SAC-1 was supposed to be a formidable super soldier.
Anyways, since he was incapable of effectively doing the night check due to his allergies, Hunter helped with the more domestic chores and had dragged dramatically groaning Crosshair by the ear to help wash all the dishes from the delicious meal, and even better Crosshair had to scrub because Hunter couldn't ruin his bandaging by getting it soaked, what with them being out of the cloth wraps and all.
It was a friendly game of sabacc at the dining table played between him, the Lawquane couple, and the Sarge that alleviated much of the Snipers annoyance, and it was a given Crosshair was fully planning to clean Hunter out of all his spare change, the two of them deciding to place a modest wager in cash while Cut and Suu chose to gamble with the few unsavory chores that rustic farm life required, and everyone hated doing.
It started out as a lovely evening in the fireplace warmed family/dining room, bathed in the dull glow of the soft lantern light. Wafting through the air was the soul-soothing scent of the warm spices flavoring the delicious pie baking, made up of sugary canned jogans from the Lawquanes stockpile. The dull pops of orange flames flickering in the hearth definitely aided in this calming effect, filling Talla's sensitive nostrils with the intoxicating earthy fragrance from the smoldering logs, so different from the lung burning variety too frequently experienced, mixed with the deadly chemicals needed to make a primed bomb that would wipe out multiple enemies in one swing, bathing everything in a cruel charred black scar instead of this cheerful, healing glow.
Factoring in the quiet laughs of the children whom Wrecker with a relaxed grin told yet another fascinating, exaggerated, and euphemized tale of the squads exploits, the low chatter from the card-playing table mixed with Crosshair's snickers when sneering Hunter made yet another stupid mistake on his turn, and the radio brought from the Marauder softly playing calm tunes in the background, it created such a relaxing atmosphere that Talla had never known before and could find herself getting used to very quickly and very happily. For the first time since arriving on Saleucami, she didn't feel so out of place - she felt herself becoming more adjusted to the children's hyperactive ways instead of wanting to rip her hair out, and the family dinner was actually pleasant instead of filled with forced conversation with the formerly suspicious parental guardians.
Yes, Talla liked this distraction from the galaxy-wide war, and the war inside herself, and the big ol' secret she needed to keep. She would almost describe herself as being at peace.
Tech had found his place on the armchair closest by the hearth, the new addition to the Bad Batch fondly dubbed as 'Gonky' carefully laid sideways in front of him and with the added help of a flashlight attached to his goggles the brainiac was vigorously scrubbing away many months' accumulation of slime, grime, and carbon scoring off the droid's armor. Gonky's feet happily wiggled at the much-needed pampering, but Tech said right off the bat he could not be fixed, yet would prove to still be useful in combat, capable of carrying enough charge to give the Marauder a boost if there ever was a need.
Cross-legged on the floor with Shaeeah and Jek, the youngin's had unanimously decided to introduce Wrecker and Talla to the creative and messy world of painting rocks, the boisterous soldiers each in their long-sleeved undershirts, pants and socks with Talla's hair tied up out of the way again, the area rug removed and replaced with a layer of old, ratty towels to protect the wood flooring.
Talla had only ever tried painting once, all that time ago in the hospital when customizing her brand-new Bad Batch armor, and sadly it was proven that painting had not turned out to be one of her strengths, so Wrecker and Hunter helped her out with the plastoid-alloy canvas... A lot. Her mind came up with some exquisite depictions, but the execution itself was sloppy, so much so that the two helpers were the ones to paint what she described for it turn out looking 'kriffing badass.' The only Talla Original Piece was the crude pine tree on her chest plate, a stark contrast to the elaborate wolf design on her back or miniature symbols on her left vambrace, but no less meaningful. It signified her first complete mission, and the self-inflicted scratches for rough tally marks on her vambrace kept track of the rest, an idea she'd picked up from that nice Captain Rex fellow.
Taking a moment to roll her head and shoulders, feeling a nagging tension start around her neck, shoulders and upper back, the Agent poured her heart and soul into her masterpiece, tongue sticking out in intense concentration which could rival the same level of focus used to disarm a bomb. Shaeeah was constantly looking for Talla's approval, and it turned out to go both ways. I mean, if the kid liked grumpy Crosshair but not her, Talla felt that'd say something was definitely wanting in her personality and Force-Dang-It she couldn't bear a sweet innocent kid liking that Snarky Sithspawn Wannabe better than herself, thinking he was so fun and cool, even if it annoyed him to pieces.
With a sharp huff, her greasy bangs were blown from her puckered forehead, and Talla had to furiously scrub away one purple ear line art that kept turning out LOPSIDED, using a damp cloth that was pale green when she started but from the multiple uses was only spreading the mess now and -
WHY CAN'T I PAINT TWO EARS THE SAME?! OR EYES FOR THAT MATTER?!
Staring hopelessly down at the failed portrait in her stained palm, Talla's former claim rang true: She's a clone soldier, not an artist, and can't figure out this whole painting phenomenon.
Her insecurity intensified when the kid in question took a break to stand and stretch her limbs, then her arms high above her head, before curious Shaeeah peeked over Talla's shoulder saying, "Oh cool, you're painting a -" Her smile twitched, "A..." Leaning closer and squinting at the purple blobbed rock the size of large meiloorun, the girl further drove the figurative vibro Talla wanted to stick in her eye when truly wondering out loud for any and everybody to hear, "What is that?"
Face clouding over with shame, the defeated woman sighed. "...It's a purple loth-wolf."
Taught to be polite, Shaeeah remembered that for all of five seconds when tilting her head this way and that, slinging an arm around Talla's neck to lean closer just to make sure she didn't need goggles or glasses like Uncle Tech, but, "Nuh-uh, that does NOT look like a purple loth-wolf."
There went a second vibro into Talla's other eye.
Curious at whatever hideous thing his sister was gawking at that wasn't himself this time, Jek was next to ease over Talla's hunched shoulder, and openly giggle alongside his big sister, "Heh, more like a purple loth-wolf after a nexu chewed it up and spit it back out!"
Offended, blotchy-faced Talla straightened and snapped, "It's not that bad!"
Wrecker didn't exactly give her a sound fact to debate with when he leaned over and with encouraging intentions gushed, "Woah hey - cool banshee, Tal!"
Utterly betrayed, her mouth slowly twisted downwards in the most disappointed frown he'd ever seen her possess. "What about this looks like a banshee, Wrecker?" Talla flatly, genuinely wanted to know and held it out for him to take, freeing her hand to tug a lantern closer for better lighting.
Cradling the rock half the size of his palm, her hands clenched to fists when he also had to pause and turn his head this way and that to fully take in this shape that Talla seemed to claim wasn't, in fact, a banshee.
Unconvinced, he pointed to the bottom of the outline that was supposed to be the chin, "Well, there's the pointy beak," Then running a thumb down near the swoosh of pointed curves on each side that were the furry jawline, "And that's the spread wings and tail -"
Her eye twitched, "It's a loth-wolf, you uncultured puffer pig." And the kids snickers irritated her ears which were turning red at the tops.
Slowly blinking, the corner of Wrecker's lip lifted in a grin of the mocking variety, "Riigghht," Plucking up the discarded portrait of his own resting on his knee, he plain just stabbed the figurative vibro through her burning heart by teasing, "And this is a rathtar!"
By the distinct line art of floppy, sock-like ears, round heads and torsos, and stubby sock-like arms plus legs, it was obviously not a butterfly but a soon-to-be portrait of him and the kids precious tooka dolls.
Promptly snatching her rock back, Talla lifted a finger and preached, "I'll have you know, there are pieces at the Coruscant Museum that contain more abstract pieces than this, and they are so amazing and revered by professionals that they consider them priceless ancient artifacts," Lifting the pitiful portrait, she said with excessively more confidence than she felt inside, "So in ten thousand years this could be considered a -"
"'Priceless doorstop?'" Wrecker joked.
In a last-ditch effort, amongst the snickers of the childish trio Talla steered her position towards the droid scrubbing maniac and was mouse-like in asking, "Tech?" He distractedly hummed in acknowledgement, and she meekly held out her masterpiece, "What do you think of this?"
Momentarily leaning over, Tech didn't need more than three seconds to completely kill Talla with embarrassment.
"That is a lovely decorative fan, Talla." He thought was a validating response, backing it up with a flash of an unusual thumbs-up, feeling risqué from being happy to have a different sort of big project to work on other than the inner workings of star ships.
Thus, his eyebrows snapped together when thoroughly confused at crestfallen Talla groaning dramatically and flopping onto her back, sending tremors through the floor as her outstretched heels also collided with the floor.
Exchanging mischievous grins, Shaeeah and Jek flopped onto the woman who spasmed and grunt on impact was drowned out by the fit of giggles.
Honestly though, Talla wasn't actually upset, even if her internal organs were turned to mush. Talla had quickly learned that children tended to like adults being just as animated as they could be, thus exaggerated her exasperation... though for real though C'MON, she was trying her best here!
But the sound of happy children and them being so at ease around her made Talla's heart soar, either way, which elicited a laugh of her own as she rose into a sitting position, gathering them up in her arms along the way and then giving their sides a little poke each, their happy squeals at being tickled catching Hunters attention across the room once again.
Such an endearing scene caused such an inner storm whirl within Sergeant Hunter, who at the farthest end of the table caused him to have a perfect straight shot gaze at the cheerful bunch, and he kept finding his attention drawn to them instead of the gambling again and again.
Causing frustration on his silver-haired brothers part when in order to recapture his attention Crosshair had to go through so much effort as to flick a toothpick at Hunter - used, obviously, so his precious stash wouldn't be wasted, making the oldest brother flinch back to reality when the wet stick bounced off his cheek, and with a noise of disgust he sneered when rubbing away traces of gross spittle.
Did this cheerful scene pulverize whatever fragments that were failing to protect Hunter's heart from causing inevitable, self-inflicted ruin? Yes.
Did Hunter want to join them? Considering Wrecker had pulled Talla into a headlock and was mussing up her hair while she struggled, not really.
But at the same time the warm glow softening the sharp ache in Hunter's chest said 'Yes,' because watching grinning, messy haired Talla impressively flip the script and now keep burly and hunched Wrecker in a choke hold and the cheering kids partaking in revenge of the childish noogie he'd inflicted on her, it was such a happy, wholesome scene Hunter couldn't help but NOT want to be a part of it, even if to be on the sidelines grinning like a fool at these antics.
Was Hunter also green with envy at how naturally good the Agent seemed to be around his own niece and nephew after two measly days, when he'd known them for just under two years?
... Not relevant.
Why can't I be different? Hunter internally sulked, on the outside looking to astutely ponder the hand he'd procured over the course of the card game, but not able to shut out the roughed-up, laughing brood returning to the art project. What is wrong with me, almost every other clone has that Mandalorian family genome that makes them good with kids-
Hunter flinched when a small person popped up next to him. "Uncle Hunter, Wrecker says you can paint!" Shaeeah proclaimed.
Hunter:
Shaeeah:
Hunter: "So?"
Though, he had a pretty good idea what was going to be asked next by the looks of her practically vibrating in excitement over this new piece of fascinating information she had not ever known about the second quiet, standoffish uncle in the bunch.
"So pretty please come paint with us!" And here came the magic puppy-dog eyes, and yanking of his arm that Wrecker said she'd need right off the bat with this guy. "Talla could use a lesson!" Wrecker told her to also use, because if Talla was included, Hunter almost always wanted to be there too.
Crosshair was no help in Hunter wanting to weasel his way out of go through this unfamiliar terrain of spending quality time with the kids, the cheeky Sniper adding Hunter might as well pick up a couple of art students to help get himself out of debt for losing this match three turns ago, and before he knew it Hunter was dragged by the hand and added to the circle of artists, sandwiched between Jek and Talla - worn out Wrecker took this magical moment where he didn't have to occupy the children to crawl over to the cushy rug in front of the fireplace with a throw pillow, stretch out his stiff limbs and take a catnap.
Things might have been weird on Hunters end since the conversations with Cut, but Hunter was still thankful that Talla was right by his side, willing to figuratively hold his hand through this experience as opposed to his brothers who profusely teased him.
I mean if Talla can figure this out so quickly, why couldn't I?
She might have been avoiding looking directly at him, but Talla was kind enough to hand him a small paintbrush, and break the ice with the brainstorming process by holding out her purple splattered rock, "Do you think there's any way to rescue this?" She sheepishly asked of the professional artist tying back his locks with a hairband she provided.
Tilting his head at the mess while swiping off his bandana, he found much of his unease overturned by hilarity, and chuckledly teased alongside with the kids, "Maybe... just not by you, though."
When he tucked his bandana in his pocket and claimed the stone, Talla flexed her hands more out of furiously fighting her anxious fidgeting habits than stretching the cramping digits, more caused by the fact she was graced with one of those rare smirks that went along with the spark of mischievousness that didn't appear because he was terrorizing droids on the battlefield, or bantering with his brothers.
Kind smiles were one thing, mischievous smirks were another, she learned. They were even rarer yet had a more flustering factor to them.
With a captivated audience consisting of the children leaning closer and closer as he worked his magic, Hunter chose to focus on smudging the purple with splashes of pink and yellow with his working thumb, and with a paintbrush dotting it with white diamond shapes, and then using this as a background for the main event: the intricate, GENIUS process of taking the time to sketch out a proper, simple loth-wolf shape from the neck up, making Talla equal parts wallowing in the waters of self-pity and yet feel the glowing embers of admiration warm her to the tips of her fingers that were being scrubbed of the purple stains.
It was hard to keep her attention focused on that, even if SHE was supposed to be the one benefitting from this demonstration. Talla found herself in danger of openly making sheep's eyes at him under the apparently all-seeing, all-knowing gazes of the Lawquane couple at the table, and the vindictive Sniper who was always keeping an eye out for ways to get on her nerves. She'd die if Crosshair ever found out about her little crush.
But... the kids asked many questions and Hunter did give an answer to each one, humbly claiming each time though that he was no expert, just self-taught like all clones. Such gentleness mixed with some awkwardness was adorable.
Hunter was a tad put off with the children so in awe over his work, veering much too close into his personal space bubble to take in every cool little thing he did to create such a TRUE exquisite masterpiece, but he had to admit it felt good to be so revered. For the first time in two years, Hunter felt a connection to these kids, and it was a nice change of pace than just the curt nod in greeting when they first arrive, some awkward small talk exchanges he had no idea how to maintain, then the awkward dance of whether it nor the kids gave him a hug goodbye as they did with huggable Wrecker, tolerant Tech, and didn't-run-away-fast-enough Crosshair.
Hunter managed to create a rather stunning yet simplistic, charcoal black furred loth-wolf with a tasteful purple streak here and there, enchanting silver eyes with a distinct twinkle that matched the starry nebulae background, all without permanently staining his clothing as Talla had her white shirt, though his bandaged hand that held the rock was flecked with droplets of every color he'd used.
And with just as much sheepishness as her, Hunter bestowed the corrected and now dried portrait of the beloved creature onto the beloved woman who had requested it.
Forgetting for two seconds that there were others around them, the Sarge and the Agent exchanged the softest smiles that they saved just for one another, just as much ignorant of potential prying eyes now with openly feeling and expressing this warmth and butterflies than when they were ignorant of the Lawquane couple accidentally coming across them on the porch two days ago. Thankfully, everyone was too preoccupied to notice and all too soon, Talla had shifted her attention to fawn over this art with Shaeeah.
Shaking out his aching hand, Hunter silently winced at the returning pulses in the bruised thumb, but to his dismay, it wasn't long until the kids excitedly requested many different commissions from the new artist in the house, Shaeeah wanting some professionally painted pretties to proudly display in her treehouse and Jek wanting to learn the process, not wanting to end this quality time with the uncle always believed to think himself so cool, he didn't bother himself with their childish activities.
And as children were, without invitation Jek plopped himself right next to Hunter who was in the middle of being stretching out his leg's stiffness, and the boy so point-blankly noted, "You know, you're a lot more fun now than before!" And Hunter didn't have time to process that when Jek picked up a larger rock for a larger portrait and held it up to the Sarge's slack face that pulled back just in time, "Can you help me to paint Gonky?"
It was not a request as the kid expectantly dropped the stone and jumpy Hunter had a split second to catch it before his ability to have children was, ahem, crushed.
Doing a double take with the stone and Jek already nabbing a clean paintbrush and chipped plate to mix colors on, settling himself more comfortably against his uncle, Hunter was faced with the reality that... he was in fact already giving art lessons but to kids now, apparently.
Like a lost puppy he looked over Jek's head to Talla, once again hoping for a figurative hand to hold because for not the first time since he met her Hunter had no idea how to go about this.
Only for his heart to sink when that playful smirk he gave her was thrown right back in his face, "Yep, your Uncle Hunter tries to act all tough on the outside," She gladly handed Jek the little tins of brown and white paint to experiment with, allowing a fist to good-naturedly tap side-eyed Hunter's arm that was, in contrast, rather impressively toned she could feel and clearly see since he'd discarded his tunic during the afternoon allergy attack, "... But - but he's actually a great big ol' marshmallow." She finished softly with flighty eye contact, clearing her throat that had strangely become bone dry.
"I am not." He immediately denied, though it was futile saving face from his little brother's torment when he heard a snort coming from the direction of the dining table party who heard rather than saw the exchange, and Hunter half-heartedly glared defiant vibros up at the woman deciding she needed some air and trying to get back on her feet-
Definitely a challenge when they were attacked with the excruciating pins and needles.
"Are so." Talla grunted, having to haphazardly grip the back of Tech's chair while circulation returned to her shaky legs, making sure to add because she couldn't torture Hunter at least... for very long, "But that goes for all of you, in fact - Shaeeah!" Said girl looked away from critiquing her brothers paint-mixing, and was met with a holodisk being her out to her with a lofty upturn of Talla's lips directed at the Sniper at the table peeking suspiciously over his card hand. "Why don't you show your favorite uncle that picture you drew of him!"
Gasping excitedly because she didn't know the half of it, grimacing Crosshair was the next to have all hope leave his glimmering eyes with a child bounding up to him and demanding his full, undivided attention.
Setting down her fan of cards facedown, Suu requested her husband's help specifically to prepare the finished desert for serving and Cut didn't think twice about following, hoping for an exact scenario where they could be alone and discuss 'Operation: Get Broody Boy and Lady Firecracker Together.'
"Status report?" He asked of Suu first, silently praying to the Force she got more promising results than him.
She bumped the oven's door closed with her hip, but it was only after placing the piping hot delicacy on the serving platters trivet, placing her oven mitts down, and gripping the counters edge when she regretfully murmured with a shake of her head, "There's nothing to report."
His heart sunk, and he mirrored her defeated positioning and tone. "For me either." And by the biting of her lip and conflicted upturn of her sad eyes, Cut had enough self-awareness to ask, "Tell me, Suu: Was this one of those times I stepped over the line? Do you think I should've left well enough alone?"
For a brief moment, Suu looked up and saw Cut was momentarily haunted by a demon of his past, by what he used to unwaveringly believe he would only ever feel like and would only be confirmed by everyone around him till the end of time: he was a clueless clone who had no idea how even the basics on the real-galaxy worked.
These scars left by the demons of his past would never go away as he and she both well knew. He had steadily broken free from the shackles thought to be permanently locked onto him by those stellar caretakers, trainers and the few traumatizing battles he fought in, but Suu never hesitated to reach out, tenderly take his weary face into her calloused yet soothing hands and lovingly reassure the man whose dulled eyes closed, "Your intentions were well, they always are, but not too many people really like receiving unwarranted advice."
Eyes sliding shut too, she lightly pressed her forehead to his, and as he sighed blissfully at the contact and gently pulled her closer by her waist she said sadly, "We cannot force two people to get out of their own heads, unfortunately..."
(ONE HOUR LATER)
Cut tapped out of the current sabacc match and decided to teach antsy Wrecker and Talla a jig, both having their fill of quiet time.
Cleared away were the tins of paint, dirtied rags, and armchairs to make way for a rickety dancefloor, Hunter and the kids tucked away in the corner to finish up their projects and compromised limbs protected by the wall of Gonky and Tech in front. Being the stars of the show on the 79's dancefloor, the Demolitions Expert and Special Agent were a quick study, so it was a given that there was much whooping and hollering and clapping and twirling to the folky tunes playing in the background - it was loads of fun! And since Suu was in a neck-to-neck match against Crosshair, without his partner Cut took turns with both Wrecker and Talla to demonstrate the dance.
And when her and Wrecker managed to complete a reel on their own without too much toe-stomping, in between breathy laughs with one hand still supported by Wrecker and the other clutching her side, Talla managed to get out that she needed to take a breather out in the cold night air, face red and glistening with sweat from the exertion.
And Talla decided she might as well go get Hunter a fresh bacta patch and bandage from the Marauder despite the insistence it wasn't necessary - by his grimace it WAS necessary and he refused to tap into the Lawquanes minimal stash.
But unanimously deciding to venture past the electric fence in the dead of night ended up being a near-fatal mistake.
For Shaeeah.
Everyone had to hand it to the kid - she had a real talent when it came to sneaking out.
It all happened so fast.
Hunter's recovering senses were overwhelmed with the kids demanding his full attention, the nose-burning and skin-irritating paint, the music Wrecker cranked up and the raise in voices to compensate.
Cut did not notice Shaeeah slip away from the painting circle shortly after Talla's exit, or that she told a distracted Hunter she was going to wash her hands of the paint with the claim of wanting to join the dancers.
Cut nor Suu had gotten around to nailing a screen to the windows of the house, thus giving Shaeeah the perfect opportunity to slip out the small round window above the toilet seat and land on the back porch below.
The curious child just wanted to see the starship again, was enraptured by the idea of being able to travel around the galaxy in style like this one day. She didn't consider the danger of being singled out as an easy target by the bloodthirsty predator which had destroyed their crops and the fence line, a fence line she crossed despite the direct order not to without a parent with a rifle. She justified it by thinking that this was gonna turn out okay, Talla was gonna be nearby soon enough.
Now, Talla's enhanced senses had capabilities Hunter himself couldn't practice, but something he'd recently taught her was that sensing the electromagnetic frequencies in the atmosphere, or in her case even body heat of an organic being was not always the best way to go about things. These too had its limits and weaknesses - the short distance her senses could only stretch so far to, and even trickier: there were creatures who could manipulate their body temperature.
After V'hiina, Hunter taught Talla how to extend her senses in a different way. People like him and her had the ability to sense certain dangers before others. By being so in tune with his surroundings not just by his sense of smell and sight but with touch and hearing, he could sense an oncoming earthquake precious seconds before the first rumble took place, which could be a lifesaver. If calm and focused enough, Hunter could sense creatures digging and crawling around underneath the planet or moon's surface.
Hiking to the Marauder, Talla slid her eyes shut and used this time to ground herself with a deep breath of the cool, earthy desert air, taking in the feel of calm nature above and around with her ears, wanting to push through the ringing. A practice session with this particular sense during a moment of calm on this moonlit pathway.
There was a light breeze that rustled through the leaves of the colossal, white bulbed flowering that had gladly opened once the harsh sun tucked away for the night, displaying their petals glistening with sparkles of enchanting green and purple hues whose glow could be seen through her closed eyelids.
Hums of insects flittering from flower to flower was a nuisance to sensitive Talla, much like how the buzz of an electric razor did when in use, but it was not as if she could shoot every little pest her enhanced orbs could pick out when they opened to direct a generalized glare at the swarms - there wasn't enough shots left in her blasters power pack. AND the flowers needed pollination to maintain the healthy ecosystem, she supposed that was important too.
But not stupid of course, that blaster was in one hand and a long vibro was as always strapped to Talla's right boot. And good thing too, because past the fence line Talla picked up the sound of heavy paws trying to silently pad against the desert floor, claws scratching against the occasional stone, the rustle of prickly quills on a rigid spine, not to mention the obviously massive source of heat stalking alongside her, thinking itself to be safely lost in the flower fields, but it was not to her.
The sound of its controlled breathing as it centered its piercing gaze on her through the tall leaves caused hers to hitch involuntarily, and with her pointer finger ready to squeeze the trigger Talla forced herself to maintain her casual stroll back to the safe haven that was the Marauder.
It did not attack when the ship's entrance ramp seemed to lower incredibly slower than usual, nor when Talla calmly climbed the steps. Strangely, the predator had apparently lost interest, and Talla could not sense it in the general vicinity anymore when with a frantic pitter patter of her heart she punched the closing sequence and released the breath she'd been holding-
Then a distant child's shriek echoed in from the ramp halfway to being sealed shut.
By sheer luck Talla wasn't crushed in that split second it took to run back, jump and use a wall for leverage and dive through the narrow window of opportunity, the tip toes of her boots just grazed by the closing metal door before landing in a somersault dive on the dusty desert floor many feet below. Heart already pounding in her ears caused adrenaline to start its pulsating spread through her ice-cold veins, she flew in the direction of the cry.
Having smartly eluded her overwhelmed senses by hanging back awhile before following, the nexu started its tortuous killing ritual by unexpectedly pouncing from the crop line at the paths halfway point and slowly, slowly crawling up to the violently trembling girl who'd fallen backwards into the prone position she was in now, her horrified features something that would be another nightmare to haunt Talla when she closed her eyes to sleep.
Talla had never been a scenario where she had to face an enemy that wasn't a droid. All the Agent could think on the fly was the obvious objective: 'Shift the nexus attention on me instead of the kid.'
It was quickly learned that even a flurry of blaster bolts could not penetrate the thick fur and hide of a nexu, but that did get its attention-
With quick work of its tail several quills were launched at her and while Talla did dive sideways and out of range all four of those red, beady eyes zeroed in on her just as planned.
Oh goody.
Until it seemed to finally click through the frozen gears in Shaeeah's mind that she was in danger. Her instinctively crying out to her mother made it snap its head back to her and she flinched, the tremors of fright intensifying.
More blaster bolts. A shout of taunts at the overgrown house pet. No results.
When its mouth peeled back in a snarl, Shaeeah felt unable to breathe properly anymore when met with a long, horrifying smile of curved and pointed teeth, two rows of fangs just designed for tearing her to shreds.
There was thirty feet between Talla and Shaeeah, and by the stars the Agent made to close the distance, running faster than she had in her entire life.
Tears pooling in her frozen wide eyes, Shaeeah's choked whimpers were broken up by frightened gasps as she scrambled backwards, crying out when she sliced her hand on a sharp rock.
At the smell of blood, the hungry nexu stalked towards her at twice the pace before, a low growl resonating in its throat.
Tail swooshing from side to side its haunches bent.
Shaeeah shrieked when it launched itself at her.
The nexu roared, extracting the claws-
Until two hands locked onto its tail midflight and with a tug like no other made it painfully collide back with the rocky ground with a resounding THUD! that sent tremors which shook both potential victims to the core.
"Shaeeah, run!" Talla urged, heaving another yank of the colossal cat who'd sunk its claws into the earth, marks left behind and roaring so loud Talla hoped the folks at the farmhouse heard because this nexu was not happy about the appendage about to be torn from its skeleton, unexpectedly shooting three quills in retaliation.
Talla cried out when one particularly serrated one lodged into her right shoulder, and would feel bad later on about snapping at the kid but when Shaeeah tried sputtering something through the desert dry mouth, the struggling Agent deemed it was not important at the moment and shouted, "RUN, DAMMIT!" Above the yowl of the deadly feline who was thrown back with strength it was not expecting from its former dinner option and painfully collided with a sizeable boulder nearby, snaked with fissures upon impact.
Fleeing, the last thing Shaeeah saw when she dared a tearful glance over her shoulder was the gravely injured nexu picking itself up from the dirt, using the last of its strength to pounce on the Agent who'd collapsed onto one knee but drawn out the vibro from its sheath regardless.
Skidding around a bend, traumatized Shaeeah shrieked incoherent protests when colliding with something, thinking it was another nexu pushing and punching back with all her might -
"Woah, kid - HEY!" Hunter managed to still her by firm hands clamping down on her quivering shoulders, and her crazed eyes began showing signs of recognizing the scary lookin' but definitely much nicer Uncle Hunter knelt before her, who when hearing the hair-raising yowl of the nexu didn't think twice about hoisting Shaeeah up into the waiting arms of her mother who caught up.
Darting around the very bend Shaeeah fled from with lungs burning and heart pounding in his ears, Hunter expected to be met with his worst fear come true.
But at the sight he slowed his run to a jog, then a walk, then he was frozen in his tracks when a little ways away, with teeth bared Talla had the wriggling nexu pinned to the ground with its legs hog-tied in a steel cord, and hacked at its neck once, causing an ear-splitting bark of pain and swipe of the forked tail.
Second strike - now came the guttural sound of it choking on its own blood when Talla actually severed the artery this time.
And one more stab made it go completely limp, bringing on a silence that was not blissful in the slightest, not when Talla's front was coated in a layer of the slain beasts' dark green blood spewing everywhere upon the second stab, its metallic scent permeating the air once pleasantly mixed with floral and earthy aromas that helped bring her some much-needed peace.
Hunter felt incredibly dizzy from the adrenaline he was struggling to come off of and by the looks of it, Talla may have won this scuffle, but she wasn't fairing much better.
Her chest rising and falling at an alarming rate, the handle of her vibro was slick with the blood pouring from the wound on the nexus neck, the wound she caused. It was difficult to pull the blade free, and Talla felt her skin crawl and violently shuddered at the squelch of the blade being wrenched out the layers of skin and muscle it had buried into, and it quickly clattered to the ground from her hand overcome with violent shakes and coated with the same sticky product of her first kill.
The bitter bile rose in her throat from the stomach she apparently lacked and needed to be able to handle taking another life, which is what was required of her as a soldier of the Republic. Mixed with the thick metallic-tasting slick that had unfortunately seeped through the cracks of her gritted teeth sucked all the good feels from what should be seen as a victory.
She'd saved a child's life.
But in order to do so, she had taken another.
Talla spat into the dirt, but that escalated into the contents of her stomach being emptied right next to the corpse losing warmth, and the hand that had gone numb and cold was a poor but only choice to help support her sliding off the nexus body.
It was no use clumsily scrambling away to escape the reek of the blood. No, there was no escape because she was quickly reminded it coated her hands, the earth sticking to it.
When going to wipe off the bloody mud, oh God her shirt, her pants, her boots were discovered to be stained by the life source of the creature she ruthlessly slayed.
You would think crazed Talla was covered in thousands of tiny insects by the way she swiped, clawed, just wanted to tear off her clothes and skin, crying out multiple times, "Get it off, get it off, GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF -"
It was as if the world's most difficult puzzle finally came together for Suu Lawquane.
Outspoken Talla had not confronted Hunter about their mutual feelings because she felt unworthy... and straightforward Hunter had not done so either because he was afraid of experiencing that soul-crushing pain and numbness and anger and grief that came with loss.
The nexu was dead, Shaeeah had a cut on her hand that could be fixed with a simple bandage, and Talla, at the very least, was still alive, though killing the overgrown house tooka seemed to have taken a drastic toll on her mental well-being.
It was only Wrecker who could restrain Talla's erratic movements, and though it further agitated her it did allow Crosshair to administer a mild sedative Tech quickly retrieved from the medbay. Hunter could only be on the sidelines, feet cemented to the ground from the scare he'd just experienced. In less than five minutes he went from enjoying pleasant family time, to being horrified the woman he cared deeply about was being eaten alive, to relief that she wasn't, to now wondering what the blazes should he do because she had snapped.
Frankly, Sergeant Hunter looked to want to scoop Talla up in his arms and never let her go, kiss her because DAMN she single-handedly took down this viscous beast, yet also looked so crazed and on the verge of breaking down himself.
Watching Talla suffer through her breakdown, and on a whim looking to the sidelines and seeing Hunter look near broken to pieces himself... It broke Suu, too.
It did not take much convincing for Hunter to agree accompanying Suu on a sweep of the surrounding land, to find the nexus den and make sure there weren't any more out there. He was the best man for the job, and needed something else to focus on.
So handing Shaeeah over to her capable father, Suu and Hunter geared up and moved out.
With Hunter leading they easily found the den in record time, on the side of a plateau much too close to the farmstead for comfort.
Fortunately, there were no other predators that Hunter could sense when they trekked through the desert, and running his gloved fingertips over the scratch marks on the walls and claw prints on the ground that matched the crime scene, the tracker didn't find evidence of two different creatures nesting in this cave, just the one who rightfully deserved its fate, in Hunter's opinion at least, suppressing a grimace when among the piles of bones he found a few smaller skulls definitely not belonging to any animal he knew of.
Straightening from his crouch, he found it odd that when upon confirming they were out of danger, Suu procured a sack that was tied to her belt and started nit-picking through the nexus shed claws, quills, teeth deeper within the cave, until he remembered how these could be verified and sold at the local marketplaces. Lots of people loved creating valuable keepsakes with such leftovers. Considering the destroyed harvest and sentient skeletons, seemed like poetic justice that she could make a profit from these.
The validity for her dawdling didn't guarantee Hunter's patience unfortunately, for though he was quick to accept the invitation of fleeing a situation that nearly crippled his own mental well-being, what made him even more agitated was not being there to make sure Talla was okay.
By his pacing by the entrance, Suu accurately read this as Hunter wanted to return to Talla's side ASAP despite how the evenings turn of events affected him.
So you could imagine his immense frustration that when they exited the den a whole half hour later, Suu requested a short breather before the long trek back. Being a farmer required being in good shape, yet here she was unexplainedly taking refuge against one side of the entrance, sliding down to sit crisscross and laying her rifle across her knees to show that this was going to be more than 'a short breather.'
"It's been a while since I was given a moment to just sit back and admire the scenery, at least without kids climbing all over me. Spending all your free time on Coruscant these days, I bet you don't get many moments like this either - let's just decompress a bit before returning to the chaos, hm?"
He didn't know why she kindly asked, as Suu had already started her survey of the twinkling desert night life, thus didn't see but rather heard her scout buddy let out a sharp breath before reluctantly plopping himself across the way, unsheathing his blade that he'd sincerely hoped to exact his revenge with.
Had to make do with his twirling blade habit sadly. Hopefully, if he chopped off a finger it'd be his broken thumb.
But the immature side of Hunter would never admit to this... but Suu had hit the mark: He did really need this moment to regain control of his senses, and from way up here on the hill side cave, it was indeed a pretty view, kind of like a layer of fairy dust coating the trees, as he'd heard Shaeeah say once.
Ever the pessimist, the dimmed lights of the bioluminescent flower tops and three moons created more haunting shadows than anything else though, only causing the pit in his stomach to come back.
What other dangers hide in that darkness, just waiting to rip away everyone I care about?
"Talla will be just fine Hunter." Suu said softly, and his eyes trained on the scenery just barely widened against his will at the perfect read of his impenetrable mind. "She's a lethal weapon of mass destruction, that one, and can obviously handle herself."
Have I grown so weak as to wear my heart on my sleeve now?
The revelation did not sit well with him. That thumb was at a dangerously close risk of being chopped off now, the blade twirling like a baton now.
"I know that." Was his automatic, predictable response to her reassurance, and that seemed the end of it for a while. Suu had not planned to discuss things any further since he made it clear it was not something he wished to do.
Until Hunter couldn't take the silence he created, drew up his knees and rushed out in a murmur, "You figured it out too, didn't you?"
Suu could've cracked a joke to try lightening the mood, but for the first time ever he appeared as little more than a frightened child to Suu. In many ways, he was, it was made quite clear to her a long time ago the Kaminoans didn't teach their property how to handle anything beyond battle tactics.
So she decided to tell a short story that had a little lesson for him to learn.
"Do you know, before Cut came along it'd been just me protecting the children for years?"
His knife twirling paused, and that brow raised in confusion.
What does this have to do with anything? She could hear him thinking.
"When he came crashing onto my doorstep, the deserter quickly found out I was completely capable of handling myself... But when he realized he was in love with me, it was as if a switch was flipped, and he became such a worry wart."
At that, Hunter knew he wouldn't stand a chance replastering on that indifference, so he directed his face back towards the dimly lit desert so she wouldn't have a view of his turmoil made crystal clear by the bright lantern. And he stayed that way until the short story was over.
That was fine, Suu was just thankful Hunter let her try after the disaster that was Cut's interrogation. She really did want to end this trip on good terms.
"Cut eventually admitted that he was part of a squadron that was ruthlessly gunned down right before his eyes, and after losing the only family he'd ever known, he didn't want to lose me too. He probably would have kept me wrapped in silk and feathers if I wasn't so stubborn and driven and independent."
A sad smile dimmed her features, remembering the era of continuous fighting and tension in their early days of marriage. "All the hovering quickly grew irritating."
Maker, I know it's not healthy. Hunter admitted to himself, frown turning wry. How about someone tell me how to get over it, for a change?
It was not as simple as 'Getting over it' but Suu knew what he'd need to face in his own time and at his own pace.
"But after I became gravely sick one winter and there was a terrifying moment he didn't believe I was going to make it through the night despite all his precautions... Cut had to accept with love there's always a risk, Hunter, always, no matter under what circumstances two people end up in."
It was only here that the anxious fidgeting stopped entirely, as the lesson began to sink in.
Thank goodness, because Suu's little story was over, and her small smile returning she said, "I'm sorry Cut hit you over the head with this - he meant well, and is still learning that there is such a thing as being overbearing... He just doesn't want any of his brothers to suffer any more than they have to, especially not self-inflicted by what those long-necks forced you to believe."
"Hmph." Hunter grunted, accepting the apology, probably better he got it from Suu than Cut anyways because the deserter might lay it on a little thick. Hunter liked how Suu was being pretty straightforward, and not making him feel too much like a kid getting the birds and the bees talk.
Again, it was like Suu could read his mind.
"He hits his brothers over the head because he wants them to take charge as soon as possible... Before it could turn into too late."
A kick to the gut, but with words.
The lantern glow intensified the warmth in her eyes and smile. "Every day, Cut makes sure to tell me he loves me at least once, and constantly shows it in various ways; he prioritizes time with the children too, so they rarely go a day without creating good memories together; he accepts the risk now, doesn't let the fear hold him back anymore because he figures if he ever prematurely dies, he'd rather die feeling satisfied with what he did do than die regretting all he should've done, should've said."
Blinking, Hunter's eyes flitted down and those brows knitted because... He'd not thought about it like that before. "Sounds depressing." Hunter gruffly snarked, though there was no real bite behind it.
"It all depends on how you look at it." Suu quietly chuckled, "Civilians loving a deserter, civilians loving clone troopers, or in this special, unheard of instance a clone trooper loving a clone agent of a different genetic template, the risk for the pain of loss is, yes, higher and that's just how it's going to be as long as this war lasts, I'm afraid.
"But you can make the most of it now."
Suu was... making a lot of sense.
Either way, fighting on the front lines or hiding out in the Outer Rim, every relationship was going to have the risk of pain, no matter the environment, if he really thought about it.
And he did. For a stretch of time. And Suu patiently waited for his input, or for him to say they should get moving. 'Either way', she'd said her piece and made her peace.
It boiled down to this for Hunter:
He wouldn't go do far as to say he loved Talla. He didn't know what that exactly meant yet, made him feel a bit woozy with those stupid yet wonderful butterflies.
'Either way though -'
"It's not fair." Hunter quietly murmured, and Suu had never seen him so raw with his emotions, not openly.
... I'm not strong enough. Hunter had claimed about himself long ago, when many months out he'd not been able to process 99's death as well as his brothers had, and move past it. The ache had not abated, nor had his anger, nor had his sadness. Talla had done everything she could, but he'd begun flipping the script soon after her forced grief counseling, sticking to training, going on walks, or holovids like she'd offered in lieu of talking.
"No, it isn't." Suu agreed, "But that's how it is. And which would you rather be feeling in the end, if that ever happened?"
Hunter could hear Tech's voice in his head now, raising that Mr. Know-it-all finger and everything, strange as that was in a moment where the topic of discussion was him and Talla.
"'Shereshoy: lust for life and much more' being the simple dictionary definition.
"But uniquely a Mandalorian word, a more in-depth explanation of 'shereshoy' is: the enjoyment of each day and the determination to seek and grab every possible experience, as well as surviving to see the next day - hanging onto life and relishing it. An understandable mindset and attitude for a warrior lifestyle.
Turns out, there was a whole lot more to life than partying it up at 79's, hoarding secret treasures and riches, basically just waiting around for the next fix of adrenaline the war seemed to have an infinite supply of.
Hunter just had to find the strength to flip the script on himself, and finally accept this cold, hard truth... That shouldn't be too hard for the infamous, fearless Sergeant of the Bad Batch, right?
Everything after that final stab of the nexus neck was a bit fuzzy, and the next clear thing remembered by Talla was waking up inside the medbay with her arms numb, Cut and Tech stitching/bandaging up her punctured shoulder and other small cuts.
She'd killed the nexu, that much was certain. Her feeling like she was going to vomit every time she replayed the brutal execution, also a certainty. The Force-awful smell of the blood staining her outer garments swiftly torn off at the first opportunity, Talla hoped she'd get used to. The war would require spilled blood from very hands eventually.
Now Hunter and Suu were off tracking the nexus den. Crosshair was inside simply lounging on the couch to make the children camping out in Talla's room feel safe and secure. Tech and Wrecker were back at the farmhouse, the former used spare parts and his brilliant expertise to ensure the fence wouldn't so easily glitch out with Wrecker standing by as his bodyguard, because Maker knew he'd be just as much help as Hunter when it came to recalibrating a mainframe-
Actually, Tech was certain Wrecker could rig this getup into a bomb. So, he was indeed the preferred choice in a helper... If they were surrounded by a droid army closing in, that is.
So Cut wasn't exactly hesitant in accepting Talla's invite to snag a beer (or in her case a cup of hot tea) and some fresh air outside the Marauder, for while she couldn't drink so soon after her procedure (being hyped up on so much meds and all... and she was cold) the farmer turned medic had well earned a stiff drink, and was thankful for its relaxing properties. Everyone had their own form of scare tonight.
Sitting and wrapping her throw blanket more snugly around herself, Talla conversationally asked to the former clone soldier lazing back on the ramp next to her, "So, were you stationed on Saleucami before deserting?" For now that she wasn't wanting to shoot a blaster bolt through his traitorous brain, Talla figured they were friendly enough that she could ask more about his history, something he'd formerly seemed willing to talk about. And she wanted to talk about anything else except her first kill.
"I served during the Battle of Geonosis, and then my battalion was assigned to Saleucami." Cut said, leaning back with his elbow on the step above, and complimentary beer perched on the knee he bent.
She could definitely tell him and Hunter were brothers - neither could sit normally.
"Were you a medic?" Was an obvious question of Talla's, since most regs were just taught to slap a bacta patch on a wound and call it a day.
He shook his head. "No, but deserting means you have to learn how to treat a wide variety of injuries and sicknesses all by yourself." Cut may have chuckled while saying this, but in all truth that was such a rude awakening one particularly grim winter, not having access to professional medical treatment.
"There's no mention of a battle here in the database shortly after the outbreak of the war, not until much later when General Kenobi and Skywalker tried pinning down Grevious when his ship crashed here but even then, there's no mention of an MIA soldier either except, temporarily, Captain CT-7567, who was injured and had to find shelter for the night."
Of course she'd look that up.
"Is that right?" Cut only voiced, rather mysteriously.
Since he was to her right, Talla subjected him to a Wrecker style, 'little playful nudge' with her uninjured hand and he chuckled an 'ow.'
"Come on, Mr. Lawquane, I'm told you know some incriminating information about me, might as well return the favor!" Realizing how loud she'd said that, a wide-eyed glance over her shoulder thankfully confirmed no one had managed to get the jump on her enhanced senses and be close enough to overhear.
An expressive man by nature, Cut's shock couldn't be contained even if he so tried.
But again, Of course she found out about the scheme, because Agent Talla managed to infiltrate his rinky-dink house without anyone hearing her, extremely resourceful and intuitive when it came to infiltration.
That friendly smile so casually worn was finally able to return to his face, "Alright - what do you wanna know?" And it was no longer irritating since Cut wasn't just 'the deserter,' but now a liberating trait in a new friend. Outside her immediate family, Talla liked being around talkative and humorous people, as it made conversation a much less daunting task.
"How did you end up all the way out here, for starters." The Agent truly wondered, taking a sip from her mug.
Cut recited almost simple word for simple word what he told that very Captain CT-7567, but providing much more detailing because he took Talla as one who was not satisfied with just the basics.
"Shortly after Geonosis, our troop transport got caught between two Separatist gunships right above this very atmosphere," His dulled eyes briefly flitted upwards towards the darkened skies, as if vividly reliving the aerial assault. "They fired at us with everything they had, and most of us were either dead or severely injured on impact, the ship torn into sections within the swamp's trees as we went down." For a moment, Talla could only sit by in silence while he needed to regain control over his own voice, "I tried getting those nearest to me back on their feet, but when I heard the clankers start working their way through the wounded in the scattered wrecks, taking no prisoners but picking them off one by one, I knew there was no hope."
"So you ran." Talla finished for him, but there wasn't malice behind it, just morbid curiosity. She couldn't imagine leaving Hunter, Wrecker, Tech or Crosshair behind. She could only imagine that leaving behind your comrades in arms brought on a lot of guilt, even if there was no other option.
For a moment that smile returned but it was sour, Cut still having bouts of simmering over the cruelty of it all. "I helplessly watched my entire squadron be gunned down like they were nothing, frozen and wracked with indecision because I knew I stood no chance against an army, but none of my brothers stood a chance of running through the swamps with me, let alone fighting, so I felt I had no choice but to flee unless I ended up like them - being gunned down with zero chance for survival, ending up a scattered body on the battlefield that no one would give a second thought about."
There must not have been first thoughts, because as Talla was growing to learn clones are thought to be just that - nothing. Even the clone trooper memorial on Coruscant only commemorated the troopers lost in the Battle of Geonosis. To her knowledge, there was no memorial for the hundreds of thousands who'd fallen since then.
"To die so soon after leaving Kamino and accomplishing nothing, it is partly what drove me to flee, but then and there I no longer believed in this path, that I'd amount to anything because they thought of me as nothing." Cut did meet her slack face this time, too drive the point home, "I retraced my steps a few weeks later... There was no evidence of an extraction team that came to check the wreckage for survivors."
Her blood boiled right there with him on that one.
And Cut needed another gulp of the beer before continuing, having missed this particular brand that wasn't sold here on Saleucami and wanting that delightful buzz to overpower this never-ending ache just for the night. Talla didn't blame him, especially when the story got even sadder.
"So one by one, I gave them all a proper burial, and realized that to the Republic all I'd ever be is a meat droid, created by the Kaminoans to fight a war we were taught to fly into blindly with no thinking beyond the here and now because we are not expected to survive, and no one will care of our sacrifices." Rolling the bottom of the bottle over his knee, he huffed with zero amusement. "The war was unpopular than, and I imagine it is even less so now."
He wasn't wrong about that. With the V'hiina mission, there was a crowd of people in the capital city who shouted at their explosive display instead of thanking them for liberating their sector. They claimed they brought their war onto their peaceful way of life, not the Separatists. At the time, Talla mentally retorted how she would've loved to see them handle the Separatists on their own, without a formal military.
It was difficult to deny there definitely was some flaws in the system after this.
"So why should I fight for an organization that thinks nothing of me?" Cut finished with, and it was a rhetorical question though Talla answered it inside her mind:
You shouldn't. Neither of us should have to.
Yet it was quickly expunged. She'd already committed enough treason as of late.
But perhaps what he went through influenced these meddlesome ways - so no one had to suffer what he did? He had to face the big wide galaxy all on his own... But Talla didn't have to.
"I'd like you to know that me, and Cut too, we're more than happy to help you out, answer any questions or concerns you have without any worry to be embarrassed - believe me, for Cut it's possible he's asked me every single one you have." Suu had made sure to tell her.
So...
Maybe Cut would understand?
Cut's vulnerability was rewarded with hers. "So, you just -" Grunting, she averted her reddening face in a momentary bout of insecurity, for she did not fully believe this particular TECH-TALK yet, "You gave up this - this 'Kaminoan conditioning' just like that? Like it's that easy?"
"Hmph, to realize that my entire upbringing and resulted mindset was wrong, that I could've just ended up like my brothers, that millions of my other brothers have or will end up just like my fallen squadron, who no one batted an eye over loss but me, that I have no power to change this reality - that is not 'easy.'" He calmly corrected her, his frown not chastising but understanding, "And it was not easy to adjust to civilian life afterwards."
"The good result though is that I did find something worth fighting for in my eyes, something worth protecting, and if others want to change the galaxy, that is their business. But I've decided to be a simpler man, with simpler needs and simpler demands - keep your claws off and away from my family." But Cut did harbor many regrets underneath his mellow demeanor. It did hurt him, how millions of his brothers and innocent civilians were slaughtered in this war.
Talla looked over shoulder again to make sure no one was eavesdropping, knowing that's how the couple found out about her and Hunter in the first place.
Then tapping her thumbs against the glass mug almost shattering from her grip, Talla murmured, "Did you feel... with Suu, when you realized that you cared for her, did you feel unworthy, like she was way out of your league?" Hearing Cut shift more her way, it showed he understood that she wanted this to be a private a conversation as possible.
Throughout the convo, he didn't even make her feel all embarrassed as she was getting the inkling he'd made his little brother when they talked. That was nice. His bout of seriousness definitely helped her voice things properly, as did his patience. It was definitely needed after tonight's ordeal. And for months this had been weighing on her mind, probably more than was considered healthy. Talla brushed away Suu but admittedly there was a huge weight off of her shoulders with someone else knowing, and a degree less of insecurity because hey, Hunter lived with her day in and day out, saw both her put-together and zombie-like days alike, and he still found her appealing.
"It's what I was conditioned to believe, and in a lotta ways I still do." Talla admitted with a tint of pink dusting her face, hoping Cut would understand and she wasn't making a complete fool out of herself by cashing in on an empty gesture, that her judgment was impaired by the administered painkillers and local anesthesia. "I'm special and confident on the battlefield, yes, but not confident and special in 'normal life.' I walk the walk the best I can, and talk the talk, but don't feel it in here yet." She pressed a hand over where her heart was, "I sometimes feel like Hunter's way above me - he's been out there for two and a half years, and I've just passed two and a half months. Even with his lot in life, he's seen so much and done so much more than me... I don't know who I am beyond a groomed soldier. I'm not special." Finally daring to lift her head and meeting Cut's dull eyes, Talla half-shrugged. "So how'd you do it?"
It was her who initiated this conversation, so Cut was confident he wasn't making the same mistake as earlier. What was even better was that Cut had indeed experienced these exact same insecurities, and Suu had been the kind soul to see past his lack of social skills, LIFE skills. He knew exactly what Talla was talking about and knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel.
The fellow clueless clone asked soberly after that brief pause: "May I offer a different view on your situation?" After a curious look plus nod, he gave the first Tech-Talk like speech the Agent wasn't so wholly repulsed by, his hand making its way to her shoulder along the way. "You were raised in complete isolation, monitored 24/7, and manipulated emotionally, mentally, and physically by people who only saw you as a possession. They controlled every aspect of your life, so you've only known one way to think, one way to speak, one way to act, but it's not your fault, and those who really care about you will understand that.
"What is all on you is how you go forward. Only you have the power and responsibility to break free from that, and to learn how to adjust to, say, civilian life, but it's not going to happen all at once." He squeezed her shoulder, "A lot of this is going to be baby steps Talla, and there are times you're going to feel stuck, and there's going to be plenty of rude awakenings, believe me."
"And... I don't believe we ever stop learning. Life is constantly changing, and we must constantly adapt along with it."
Now she could tell Cut and Tech were definitely brothers too. Once started, they could go on and on if not stopped.
Good thing was, since Cut was her friend now, Talla didn't mind this either. Everything he said made sense. She felt heard. She felt understood.
"But Suu still gave you the time of day even though you were a clueless clone?"
His smile was warm now, from two years' worth of pleasant memories so far. "It was a learning curve for both of us, and there was, is a lot of ups and downs, and I'm not saying there's a guarantee you and Hunter will be endgame -" He shrugged, raising his bottle to his lips, "But you could be, and you'll never know unless you go for it."
... She felt hope.
There was nothing more to say. Talla had said her piece, Cut had said his, and both were feeling much lighter than they did before the accident.
Clinking their mug and bottle together, meddlesome Cut marveled at how much more productive a serious conversation that WASN'T FORCED is! Definitely provided those happy, satisfactory results he was looking for, evident by Lady Firecrackers eyes and smile lighting up when she laid eyes on Broody Boy specifically when the scouting buddies returned a little past midnight, not fighting to hide it this time.
Just as Suu reassured him, approaching the ship Hunter saw Talla was in fact looking better, not knocking on death's door but casually sitting on the steps with Cut, engaged in an apparently riveting discussion.
"You've opened my eyes - I never even considered carving as an art!" She gushed, which immediately flooded Hunter with relief. It appeared she was bouncing back quick from her 'first kill' and had not lost that spark which he adored. That warmth openly displayed to him specifically when Talla caught sight of their return, nor was he able to hide that small smile lighting up his weathered face nor the slight hastening of his pace.
"If you're interested in carving, I've got some materials for you to experiment with." Suu added when they were close enough, holding out the filled satchel which Talla curiously accepted, giving the wife an opportunity to bend down and exchange a quick kiss with her relieved husband, who quietly said Shaeeah was feeling a bit better now.
Digging in and pulling out a particularly large claw with a grin mixed with awe and unease, Talla said, "Hey, I could do something like those vendors who sold trinkets at the markets!" Like Hunter, she thought it would be poetic justice - her first carving project could be turning on of these into a - a pendant for a necklace or something! She'd kinda thought those were cool.
And then the most fantastic idea came to her, and definitely made Talla change her tune because something really good could come out of this nightmare experience!
Thank you, Saleucami Markets, for the inspiration!
Reaching out to latch onto Suu's hand, Talla openly admonished with a serious raise of her brows, "You guys should sell the nexu pelt, that oughta earn you a nice chunk of change, don't you think?"
"Well, wouldn't you rather reap the benefits of your kill?" Cut assumed.
"Not really, plus I figured since you -" Talla caught herself just in time, though it was really hard to feign sadness when there was some happy news in the making, "Since you lost the harvest to this blasted nexu, you might as well make money off its corpse - I wouldn't mind!"
It took a little convincing, but Talla really wanted nothing more to do with the slain beast's corpse - the sooner it was out of her sight and out of her hair, the better, nor did she want anything to go to waste, some of the farm lifestyle rubbing off on her. Cut was astonished because while they had lost the crop, they did have everything they needed. Suu was less astonished at her generosity, but that was because she knew the secret meaning behind Talla's sacrifice, and deeply touched.
In the end it was decided that Suu and Cut would take care of the carcass tonight, and take the meat into town to see if there'd be any buyers because there was always a sucker for exotic produce. Talla would take those proceeds of that and the nexu products Suu gathered for her, and the Lawquanes would put forth the effort of, over time, turning the pelt into an expensive rug to sell for the family's benefit.
And Cut was none the wiser about the twins, thank the Force, and by then Tech and Wrecker had valiantly returned from their completed assignment, and hit the rack not long after Cut and Suu left for theirs.
Soon, it was just the Sergeant and Agent of Clone Force 99 standing outside the Marauder, the blinding lights of the ship's entryway ramp behind them and the twinkling wonderland in front of them.
Thoroughly spent, Hunter expected Talla to follow him up the steps into the ship, but she remained motionless below. "You comin' in?"
Considering the last time she'd ventured outside at night ended badly, when her good shoulder shrugged dismissively, "Eh," He was baffled, and she threw a lop-sided grin back up at him that brought on that all too familiar kaleidoscope of butterflies in his stomach. "I'm still reeling a little bit from everything that's happened." The deserter, the conversations, the attack. Life could just throw multiple curveballs at you all at once. She was trying to process it all with a smile on her face as usual.
But suddenly, Hunter wasn't tired either - this was perfect! What it was perfect for, he didn't know yet, but no brothers, no sister-in-law, no kids... there was bound for something to happen between them as always. Maybe this time, it wouldn't feel so illegal. If Hunter knew Cut Lawquane, that man definitely had something to do with the drastic change in Talla's demeanor, as Suu did for himself. This time, their meddling wasn't such a bad thing after all. Perhaps they could finally be brave enough to just lay it all out in the open once and for all.
Hunter scooped up the mug he'd nearly tripped on and holding it up asked, "Want a refill on that tea... and some company?"
Please say yes.
"More like a bodyguard, but sure." Talla halfway laughed to the second question. "Decaf, please!" She was already jumpy enough as it was.
When Hunter was inside, he gladly shed the top half of his bulky armor, keeping the waist down on so the blaster remaining holstered at his side just in case. But he regretted not getting a jacket almost as soon as he rejoined Talla because of the cold night air. Hopefully the mug of tea he'd made for himself would keep him warm.
Even better, when a breeze passed and he was quick to start downing his tea, Talla noticed the goosebumps on the exposed part of his forearm, and while there was the fear someone would catch them red-handed, how incriminating was a hug? It didn't really matter so much to her now, anyways.
Hunter felt a pang of fear watching her leave him, thinking their possible, rare moment alone wasn't in the cards because she'd finally succumbed to exhaustion.
Definitely the highlight of his day when Talla didn't leave, rather, set her mug on the first step which she climbed on, turned and spread her arms and in extension her warm blanket and beckoned, "C'mere."
Four months ago, Hunter would have blatantly walked away from someone offering him a hug.
Now, he didn't need to think twice about discarding his mug next to hers and stepping into Talla's warm embrace, careful not to jostle her right shoulder, but with no height difference now had no problem curling head closer to the left side of her neck, one arm around her midriff and his other hand splayed between her shoulder blades to hold her as close and tightly as possible.
The tip of his nose was indeed chilled and was a stark contrast to her warm skin, kinda tickled actually, yet Talla had locked her arms around his neck, keeping them both wrapped in the warm cocoon of the blanket.
They each mentally berated themselves for fighting this for so long. Blood, sweat, dirt, antiseptic, plasma, they could pick out the distinct scents every product of their shitty lives on each other's skin and clothing. But this is exactly what they needed. The calm. The closeness. The warmth.
"Hey, 'm sorry about embarrassin' you in front of the kids with all that marshmallow talk." Talla lowly apologized, breath tickling his ear tipped with red from the cold this time.
Yet, with one hand keeping the blanket clasped shut, it freed her other to shift to the crown of his head and letting her fingers just slip into his hairline, sifting through the shorter, softer locks there, and she smirked to herself when Hunter briefly curled his head closer to her neck, going a bit limp in her arms with a happy little sigh that tickled her neck again. "... Even though it's the truth." She'd seen variations of this sort of affectionate action displayed on holovids and novels. When she offered slight pressure with her fingers against his scalp, the light massage was positively received, and when accompanied by the light drag of her fingernails from time to time, she didn't really believe it could turn someone into putty in her hands until now.
It took a bit before her apology was recognized through his brain turned to mush. "Don't worry about it." He was highly reluctant about pulling away, but he kept his hands on her waist peeking out from under the cropped tank top she's wearing. "I've known those kids for a couple years now, and I was always a little envious of Wrecker, how naturally good he was with spending time with 'em. I've never really spent any time with Shaeeah and Jek until tonight... 'cause of you." Neither brought up the ruined evening, though by how they were both wearing warm smiled and lidded eyes they supposed it wasn't so ruined after all.
It was strange and electrifying all at once, being in such close proximity. Arms still about his neck, his face was inches from hers, it made it easier to pick some of his tinier scars, just some faded pale lines like the one on his right cheekbone, and another right under his jawline. It was funny how she thought scars would be unbecoming on her, yet on him it only furthered her attraction to him.
Before she could overthink it, before she could chicken out, all at once Talla veered her face closer, lightly nudged his nose and whispered close to his lips, "Can I -" Kiss you, she finished in her mind. Not having prior experience as she was sure he must've had, Talla didn't know silent signals, didn't know if coming right out and asking would be weird, or kill the mood.
It definitely didn't, the adrenaline pumping through their veins running the show now instead of their anxiety-fueled hellhole for a mind.
Their first kiss was barely that. Actually, a peck would be a more accurate description, just a tentative touch of his lips to hers in response, softened by the honey sweetened tea. She wasn't even sure it happened, either woozy from the meds or perhaps it did happen, and she was overwhelmed because by the stars, Hunter had kriffing kissed her.
Eyes unable to open afterwards he kept his forehead pressed to hers, but was instantly rigid when there was no immediate indication on how she felt, the Sarge was as always ready to flee if he somehow, by a huge longshot, misunderstood her two worded question.
By Talla forgetting holding the blanket all together and pulling him in for a real one, he was finally, finally able to relax into her embrace where he belonged, tug her closer when feeling herself hesitate against his lips, tilting his head a little more and silently telling her when his lips moved against her unsure ones that this was fine. More than fine.
To feel that rush, to feel alive away the battlefield, they could give that to each other.
Oh, and some much-desired Huntla fluff, did I forget to mention that?
Don't ya just love me?
- Ella :)
P.S. Apologies for the Saleucami Arc turning out longer than I originally intended... I just love Cut and Suu sm heheh. Sadly (for me) the next chapter we shall be saying farewell to the Lawquanes... for now. Expect Shaeeah's lil bit of trauma, the big baby secret's reveal, and infinitely more family fluff in the next chapter hehehe