Beta'd by Rakina

The NC-17 rated version of this chapter can be found here: http// faynia. insanejournal. com /108555. html (all you have to do is remove the spaces and add":" after the http. I'm sorry but this is just another reason why I hate and am probably not going to be posting much more on this site.)

Chapter Twenty

"You look handsome," Lily said, beaming at Harry. He stood before her portrait, dressed in his dress robes and feeling rather silly.

"Yeah, but I feel awful."

Lily shook her head. "You are getting married, love. You're allowed to feel awful."

"You're supposed to feel like vomiting?" Harry asked, tugging at his collar.

"Your father did vomit," Lily told him. "Twice, if what his father said was true."

"Really?" Harry asked, laughing. That made him feel oddly better. "Where is Dad?"

"Hiding." Lily rolled her eyes. "He's being a baby about this, Harry. But give him time, and he'll come around."

"It's not like I asked for any of this to happen," Harry said irritably.

"Is it going to be so awful?" Lily asked, frowning.

"No. Yes. I don't know! I don't know what to expect, and it will be weird having someone else in my head."

"You'll be in Severus' as well though."

"I know."

Lily sighed. "Harry, he's a private man, he's always been a private person. Do you understand how much worse this will be for him?"

"Of course I do!" Harry blew up. "Of course I know because he told me! And then he told me he didn't mind, and I just don't know what to do about it!"

"What do you mean?"

"Mum, last night…" Harry shook his head and dragged his fingers through his hair.

"Honey, I can't help you if I don't know what's going on. What happened last night?" Lily asked softly. "He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No, he didn't hurt me." Harry slouched back against the door across from the painting of a field he'd found his mother in earlier. "He confused me."

"Severus is quite good at that," Lily said, and Harry sensed she was fondly amused.

"You didn't hate him, did you? Not like Dad anyway," Harry said thoughtfully.

Lily shook her head. "No. Don't get me wrong, he made me angry and there were times I wanted to hex some sense into him, but I never hated him."

"Do you think this will end well, Mum?"

"I think that's up to the two of you," Lily answered. "I've watched the two of you together, Harry. I've seen the expression on his face when he looks at you, when he thinks no one is looking. I truly believe he cares for you and will do right by you if you give him the chance."

"You've been spying on us?" Harry laughed.

"I prefer to think of it as making sure my son would be well cared for," Lily said, flipping her hair off her shoulder. "Don't worry, I won't be lurking around watching the two of you," she assured him.

"Oh god, Mum." Harry screwed up his face in horror.

"What? I've never been in your bedrooms and have no intention of visiting. In fact, most of the portraits in the main part of the house are going to leave you both alone for the next couple of weeks while you settle in."

"Will you be there though?" Harry asked. "This afternoon? I know Dad won't want to go, but--"

"Harry, of course I'll watch that part, most of us portraits will be there. It's not very often, from my understanding, that the bonding actually occurs here."

Harry nodded. "I suppose I should go and find Snape then. Severus. I just can't get used to that. I can't imagine he'll be pleased if I'm late," he said, chuckling nervously.

"I can't imagine he'd mind so long as you do show up," Lily said, and Harry could see her hand twitching as if she wanted to reach out.

"Thank you, Mum, I'm glad you'll be there," Harry said, smiling softly at his mother.

Her hand covered her mouth, and she had the same look Hermione got right before she started to cry over something sappy.

"Mum, please don't cry," Harry begged. Footsteps approached from his left and he turned to see Snape walking down the hall.

"I'm just happy, love," Lily assured him.

When Snape joined Harry in front of the portrait, Lily looked him up and down. "You look very dashing, Severus," she told him, smiling. "You should wear black more often," she teased.

Harry bit his lip to keep from laughing, but shortly his mouth fell open in shock.

Snape was laughing. "Thank you, Evans, if only you had given me such fashion advice earlier," he said, smiling genuinely at Lily.

"I would have if I had known you would have listened."

"Were you able to talk him out of running?" Snape asked, looking at Harry.

Harry gasped in mock outrage. "I wasn't going to run!"

"Does that mean you're ready?"

"I'm wearing the starched robes," Harry joked.

"Who knew you cleaned up so well?" Snape teased. "Shall we get on with it then?"

"Where are we doing this anyway?" Harry asked, snagging one of Snape's hands in his.

Snape interlaced his fingers with Harry's, squeezing his hand gently. "I had thought the library, but I have been ordered to do it in the study down here," he said, tugging Harry down the hallway.

Harry cocked his head to the side in confusion. "What for?"

"I expect because Thelonious and Carlisle don't wish to have to leave the comfort of their normal room," Snape grumbled.

"Pricks." Harry grinned and shook his head. "We're going to be stared at." The blank canvasses around him told him that well enough.

"The ceremony should be blessedly brief at least," Snape said, pushing open the door to the study.

"I'm going to screw this up, I just know it," Harry murmured.

"You'll do fine," Snape assured him, entering the room. Thelonious and Carlisle were standing in the middle of the largest portrait, and Snape assumed the women at their sides were their wives.

"Da' look!" Katherine cried, tugging on her father's robe. "He came back!" She turned to the little boy beside her. "See, Jamie. He's not scary at all. I told you."

Harry blushed and gave a small wave to the little girl. "Hello again."

"Katherine, behave."

Katherine scooted behind Carlisle's legs and peered out up at her father. "Yes, Da'."

"Severus, are you prepared to take the vow?" Thelonious asked.

"I am," Snape replied.

Harry gnawed on the corner of his lip. His eyes flickered up to meet Carlisle's.

"You're nervous."

"So were you," Harry shot back, nerves fraying.

Thelonious snickered, and Carlisle glared at him. "I warned you not to write everything down," Thelonious said, ignoring the look.

"You wrote in there too, I would like to remind you."

"So I did."

"Perhaps we can get on with this," Snape snapped, his nerves finally manifesting themselves.

Harry squeezed Snape's hand in what he hoped was a reassuring manner.

Harry looked around the room, scanning the portraits until he found his mother. He was surprised to see his Dad slip into the frame and take Lily's hand. He winked at Harry, and something inside of him unclenched, knowing that his father was there.

"Are you ready, Harry?" Carlisle asked, a hint of a smirk playing at a corner of his lips.

Harry nodded, not yet trusting himself to not throw up. He knew he'd have to say something, but he was damned if he knew what. The one thing he did know was this was not like any wedding he'd ever heard of. For one thing there were no other actual people present. For all the eyes staring at him, not one of them could be counted on as a witness.

"Severus, please kneel before your King," Thelonious said, and his voice had become serious and businesslike.

Snape removed his hand from Harry's and knelt before him. Harry swallowed, wanting to tell Severus to stand up, to stand beside him, not kneel before him like a servant.

Carlisle sighed softly. "Relax, Harry."

Harry tensed and nodded at the command. He didn't like this at all. And what was he supposed to say?

"Severus Snape, do you hereby swear fealty, loyalty and fidelity to Harry James Potter, your King and Monarch?" Thelonious asked.

Snape looked up at Harry. "I so swear."

"Do you swear to fulfill the Vow of your ancestors, protecting your Monarch with your blood and very soul, even unto the death?"

Snape's eyes never left Harry's as he answered, "I so swear."

Carlisle stepped forward in the portrait. "Harry James Potter, do you accept Severus Snape as your steward and life mate?"

Harry licked his lips, unsure if there was some formal way he was supposed to answer.

"Yes. I do," he said, looking at Carlisle who nodded, then returned his gaze back to Snape.

"Do you agree to be bound to him, mind, body and soul?"

Snape was looking at him with such intensity that Harry couldn't look away from his black eyes.

"Yes. Yes, I agree," Harry said, his voice becoming stronger, drawing strength from Snape.

A blue glow began to form around the two of them, but Harry was hardly aware of it. He couldn't look away from Snape.

Severus.

The light built around them, and Harry felt his skin prickling as he and Severus seemed to absorb the magic surrounding them, until it became a part of them, and they became a part of one another.

"Rise, Severus, and join your mate," Carlisle ordered.

"No," Harry said, dropping to his knees. "I'll join my mate."

Carlisle smiled.

"You know what must be done to seal the bond?" Thelonious asked.

"Yes, we know," Snape rasped.

"When the act is complete, it shall be sealed, and none shall ever break it," Carlisle intoned, and Harry felt something vibrate within his chest.

"We know," Harry murmured, stretching out a hand to trace Severus' jaw. He could feel a tightness there that just wouldn't do. "We know," he repeated, moving forward, fingers stroking over Severus' high cheekbones.

"We know," Snape echoed softly and closed the distance between them.

When their lips met, it was like nothing Harry had ever felt before. It was completeness and it was perfection, and he couldn't imagine wanting to be anywhere else than with Severus. Distantly he heard noises of approval and knew it meant something, but in that moment he didn't care. His hands curved around Severus's chin and up to cradle his cheek and the back of his head. Then Snape's hands were cupping his face, and he was kissing him with a hunger that left Harry breathless.

When they finally pulled apart, Thelonious' chuckle broke the daze surrounding him, and Harry found himself blushing.

"Thelonious, leave them be," Carlisle admonished.

"Yes, my King," Thelonious answered, grinning.

Carlisle cuffed him on the back of his head, making Jamie and Katherine giggle wildly.

"If we're finished here?" Snape said, looking over his shoulder at the portrait.

"In a hurry?" Thelonious asked, earning him a glare from Snape.

"Are we?" Harry asked uncertainly.

Snape's smile made a shiver run up and down Harry's spine.

"Yes, you are done," Carlisle answered, taking pity.

Snape rose to his feet, and reached out a hand to Harry, pulling him up. "Are you ready?" he asked, kissing Harry softly.

A light blush stole up Harry's cheeks. Everyone was still in their frames, including his parents. "Yes."

Snape nodded.

"I trust there will be no visitors in the other parts of the house?" Snape said, his eyes scanning the portraits.

"I will see to it," Thelonious promised.

"Did you wish to speak with your parents?" Snape asked politely.

Harry nodded. "Yeah, I'll just be a minute."

Harry went over to the portrait his parents were in, and his mother was dabbing her eyes.

"You did well, Harry," James said, and Harry could tell he was uncomfortable.

He appreciated the effort though. "Thanks. You okay, Mum?"

"I'm wonderful," Lily assured him. "It was just so lovely."

James rolled his eyes and Harry laughed. "I'll see you later then, I've got to… well, I'll see you later," Harry finished, blushing furiously. He hurried back to Snape's side so he didn't have to look at his father.

Snape took his hand, and led Harry out of the room. They walked in silence down the hidden hallway. Harry kept close to Snape's side, wondering if the man was as nervous about the next part as he was. "Where are we going now?"

"The library," Snape told him.

"What? The library? Why?" Harry asked, surprised.

"Because you're less liable to panic than if I drag you straight to bed," Snape replied.

"Oh." Harry looked down at the floor to hide his embarrassment. Snape would be right, if they had gone straight to bed he wouldn't have let Snape anywhere near him.

The Christmas tree still filled the library with twinkling lights and soft singing. "If you'll sit for a moment, I have something for you," Snape told him, walking to the tree. He reached into its branches and pulled out a small box; he returned to the couch and sat next to Harry.

Harry stared at the box in Snape's hand then back at his face. He met Snape's gaze and was startled to see that the man was nervous. Harry's fingers gripped his dress robes. "What is it?"

"You could open it and find out."

Harry's fingers were trembling slightly as he undid the string around the box and opened it. There was a silver band inside with strange markings around the outside. He looked curiously at Snape. "A ring?"

"It's tradition," Snape said, still looking nervous. "Though you can choose which finger you wish to wear it on if wearing it on your left ring finger makes you feel uncomfortable."

Harry held it up against the soft candlelight as he inspected the band. The markings looked like runes, but he couldn't tell which ones. He slipped it down on the left ring finger and jumped when it resized to fit his finger. "Tradition?"

"As sign of our bond and the vows that go along with it," Snape said, taking Harry's hand and examining the ring, turning it slowly around Harry's finger.

Harry licked his lips nervously. "Oh, but--"

"Yes?"

Harry frowned, and ducked his head. "Thank you."

Snape placed a finger under Harry's chin, raising his head. "You don't have to wear it," he said, frowning.

"It's not that."

"Then what is it?"

"It's really nothing."

"I see," Snape replied, not seeing at all. He stood and walked to the tree, watching the fairies dance in and out of branches.

"Just a stupid thought," Harry tried to explain. "It really doesn't matter. I'm not exaggerating."

"As you wish," Snape replied stiffly.

Harry rubbed his eyes and sighed. There was no way he was going to tell Snape what he was originally going to say. Aside from sounding like a moron, he reckoned he really didn't want an answer to it either. He pushed himself off the sofa and crossed the room to stand beside Snape. He brushed his fingers over the man's hands once, twice, then curled his fingers around it.

Snape squeezed his hand gently. "Was it as bad as you thought it would be?"

Harry shook his head. "I feel silly for getting so nervous about it."

"You didn't know what to expect, it's understandable," Snape said reasonably.

"You didn't either," Harry pointed out, "but you didn't look like you were about to throw up!"

"I wasn't really losing anything," Snape said, shrugging. He tugged Harry until his back was against his chest. Releasing his hand, he wrapped his arms around his waist and rested his chin on the top of his head.

"And I was?" Harry asked, putting more of his weight against Snape.

"Hmm," Snape answered, leaning down and kissing the back of Harry's neck.

"Now who's being vague," Harry murmured, reaching up a hand, twirling loose strands of black hair through his fingers.

Snape let his teeth graze across the sensitive skin of Harry's neck. His hand slid up Harry's waist to his collar and he pulled it out of the way, giving himself better access.

Harry shivered and did nothing to hide the fact. He let his head hang to the side, exposing more of his neck.

Snape slid his other hand around, parting Harry's robes and sliding a hand under his shirt. His fingers trailed upwards, brushing across Harry's nipples while at the same time he sucked on Harry's neck.

"Should we be doing this in here?" Harry gasped.

"We aren't doing anything yet," Snape murmured, flicking Harry's earlobe with his tongue. "Let me know when you're ready to do something, and we'll go upstairs," he continued, sliding his hand down across Harry's stomach, to his hip and down his thigh.

"Keep doing that, it might be sooner than you'd think."

"Mmm," Snape hummed, sliding his other hand down Harry's other thigh, then sliding them both upwards, his thumbs barely grazing Harry's erection. "No hurry," Snape whispered, kissing the other side of Harry's neck.

"No hurry?" Harry repeated with a small whine.

"Shall we go upstairs?" he asked silkily.

Harry nodded, shivering at the voice so close to his ear.

Snape released Harry with a last kiss to his neck. He took him by the hand, kissed his palm, and led him up the stairs and to the bedroom.

By the time they made it to the bedroom, Harry was looking tense and nervous again. That just wouldn't do. Snape sat on the edge of the bed, and placed his hands on Harry's hips, pulling him forward to stand in front of him. He slid his hands up under Harry' shirt, caressing his flesh.

Harry's head bowed till it touched his chest and he watched the hands under his shirt with fascination. The occasional gasp became the only outward indication that Harry was enjoying the treatment.

Snape lifted Harry shirt and placed his lips against his stomach, his tongue flicking against his belly button.

"That tickles," Harry gasped, squirming in Snape's hold.

Snape stilled for a moment. "Tickles?"

Harry flushed, and clenched his fists at his sides. "Yeah."

"We can't have that," Snape said, brushing his thumbs along Harry's waistband.

Harry sucked in a sharp breath.

"Still tickles?" Snape asked, repeating the motion.

"N-no."

Snape's thumbs moved lower, slipping under Harry's briefs, stroking across the hair bristling there.

"Can we please just get this over with?"

Snape's fingers froze and retreated from Harry's waist. "If you wish," he said, getting to his feet, causing Harry to stumble backwards. Snape shrugged out of his robe and began undoing the buttons of his shirt.

"Wha-what are you doing?" Harry stammered.

"Getting it over with. How would you like me? On my knees or on my back?"

Harry held up his hands and slowly backed away from Snape like he was a wild animal. "W-wait, what?" he yelped. "I-you-what!"

"You wanted it over with, I'm merely trying to accommodate you," Snape said, frowning.

"I know what I said," Harry snapped, raking his fingers through his flyaway hair.

Snape sat on the bed, his shirt unbuttoned. He buried his face in his hands and asked, "What do you want me to do? I'm trying to make this bearable for you, but I'm obviously doing it all wrong. So just tell me what you want."

Harry moved slowly across the room and sat down on his hands at the edge of the bed. "Look at me."

Snape looked at Harry, feeling defeated in his efforts. "Yes?"

"Explain."

"I thought that is what I just did."

"No, not that," Harry bit out, irritated. "I meant that--" Harry gestured to Snape's open shirt. "Why am I the one that's supposed to do things?"

"Because I must submit to you to place the final seal on the bond," Snape explained.

"But I thought you'd already done that?"

"To put it simply, the ritual isn't over until you fuck me. Is that clear enough?"

"Crystal." It was Harry's turn to bury his face in his hands. He was going to screw this up so badly.

"I thought I had explained that to you already; that you understood."

"Well, clearly I didn't."

"Now what?" Snape asked tiredly. "Do you need a potion or something to arouse you? I prepared one, just in case."

Harry shook his head. "Kiss me?" he suggested weakly.

Snape didn't speak as he shifted across the bed and gripped Harry's chin between his fingers. Scanning nervous green eyes, Snape leaned forward and ghosted thin lips over Harry's. When Harry didn't pull back, he moved his hand to cradle Harry's flushed cheek. He ran his thumb over the smooth flesh, before dipping down to capture Harry's lips once more.

The kiss was becoming more heated by the second, and Harry was afraid his heart was beating so fast it would come right out of his chest. Then Snape pulled him back on the bed, his hands moving gently over Harry's body.

Snape went slowly, removing Harry's clothes piece by piece, surprised when Harry began to remove his as well. "You're sure—"

Harry sucked on Snape's lower lip with a pointed look, and so he stayed silent. Not that Snape's brain could have formed a coherent argument at that point. One of Harry's hands ran up and down Snape's chest while the other one struggled with the button on Snape's trousers. Harry's thumb brushed across Snape's nipple and the older man shuddered. Pushing away Harry's clumsy fingers, he hastily undid the button and pushed his trousers down over his hips. He canted his hips up and Harry helped him drag off his trousers completely. Severus gazed at Harry through lidded eyes, waiting for a reaction. Whether it was positive or negative, this had to happen tonight. Harry seemed riveted though; his thumb had stopped its lazy circling around his nipple as he simply stared at Snape's naked body. A slow smile parted Harry's lips; sparkling green eyes rose to meet black.

Less than twenty minutes later, they both lay panting side by side, completely spent. "How was it?" Snape asked Harry, brushing the hair from his forehead.

"Short," Harry said, gasping at the cool air that hit his sweaty forehead.

Snape chuckled. "The first time is almost always short. Your stamina will increase over time." Curious to see how the bond was, Snape thought: Which do you prefer, tea or cocoa? He waited to see if Harry would respond to the thought.

"Cocoa," Harry answered out loud then blinked. He turned onto his side, pushing back the sleepy haze that had stolen over him. "You didn't say that aloud did you?"

"No, I didn't. You try it. Think of me and of what you want to say."

Harry didn't think that'd be so hard. What was that last question about?

"Tea or cocoa," Snape said aloud, then grinned. "Interesting."

Harry grinned, slapping him lightly on the chest. "That's not what I meant, you git."

"It was just the first question that came to mind, and I haven't the slightest idea why," Snape admitted, resting his forearm across his forehead.

"I knew you were weird, but I didn't know you were that weird," Harry joked.

Snape arched his brow. Brat.