A/N: To the following awesome people who reviewed (Your favourite plushie, Kusagi, and Azilie) I love you. I can just end the chapter on that :P. Anyways, yet another chapter from yours truly. Hopefully, readers are enjoying, if not, please feel free to tell me in the form of a fist to the face.

"My hands are searching for you / My arms are outstretched towards you / I feel you on my fingertips / My tongue dances behind my lips for you / This fire runs in through my being / Burning, I'm not used to seeing you / I'm alive / I'm alive
The Elric's Home
Daybreak finally struck through the windows of the Elric's home, but Edward hadn't slept a wink that whole night. He could only stare at his hands, wondering what happened. It was safe to say that something strange was going on with Riza. Her voice would go from soft to harsh in an instant, as if she couldn't make up her mind on how she felt about things. The soft voice felt so familiar to him, which was the Riza he remembered from the other side of The Gate. Sure, she could be stern, but it was still a soft voice. He tried explaining things to her the night she woke up:

(A/N: Don't forget, the underlining means the Riza who lost her memories, the one with the softer voice, I say this so I don't have to keep typing in 'the one with the soft voice.')

"I'm Edward Elric. I'm a scientist who was researching your case."

"My case?"

"Edward Elric? I feel like I've met you before."

"Riza, do you remember anything?"

"I remember a woman and a knife. Then I awoke here." She put her hand to her head, "And I have a terrible headache."

"Why can't I think straight. Is this really my body? I can't remember! Is this how I always looked? Why do I feel like I don't belong in this body!"

"Riza, I don't know what's wrong with you. I could give you some aspirin if you'd like. Maybe it could help your headache."

"I feel like my thoughts are split in two. And this voice that speaks is not my own sometimes."

"I feel like I'm sharing my head with another. We're alike, it's my voice in there, but it's not my thoughts. What's going on?"

"Listen, Riza, just lay back, I'll have Leni look in on you."

After trying to explain things, he knew it was no use. Whatever was wrong with her was out of his hands now. He had done all he could, and it was time to give her back to the doctors.

Edward could hear Riza breathing in there, and every now and again he checked her pulse. He wanted to make sure she wasn't slipping back into a coma. He wanted to be with her to help her with everything, but what did he know about this Riza. A part of her, the part that spoke with a softer tone, it was trying to remember herself. He wanted to tell her that she was a strong willed successful woman of the military. But what would that mean to her? It wasn't his Riza Hawkeye. Was it? That voice was just as he remembered her.

The only thing that could be heard for quite a while was the sound of Riza's breathing and the chatting of birds beginning their morning routine, until the sound of the front door being opened broke the pattern. Leni met Edward at the top of the stairs, "My father will be by soon to take him with her for tests. He wanted me to thank you for everything."

I can feel you all around me / Thickening the air I'm breathing / Holding on to what I'm feeling / Savoring this heart that's healing
The Soldier's Graveyard, Munich
The funeral began at daybreak. The soldiers all lined up in mourning as the casket that contained Maes Hughes was slowly lowered into a fresh grave. Jean Havoc watched in silence as his most dearest of friends was buried. Gracia stood mutely next to him. The only thing he could think of to reassure her only pained him to say, "No one could have seen this coming."

Gracia looked up at Havoc. The insignia on his jacket labeled him a member of the Nazi party. She remembered how hard it had been to convert Maes. It was one thing for him to be in the military, fighting in the name of Germany. But the Nazi extremists he had gotten entangled with were changing him for the worse. She had begged and she had pleaded, and finally, Hughes decided he too did not like where the Nazi party was leading him. But Havoc followed the words of Adolf Hitler blindly. He was a pawn, and from what she had heard from Hughes, so was his soon to be wife, Riza Hawkeye. She had never met the woman, but she had been told that she was a disgusting sort of beauty, the kind of woman who had the face of a Goddess by the mind of an executioner. Gracia had prayed that God would give her and Havoc a heart of flesh, but the insignia on his jacket told her that her prayers still sat unanswered.

But Gracia could not ignore the pain in Jean's eyes. He did love Maes Hughes. Even though their minds and hearts were loyal to different things, their bond of friendship still merged the two together. And Gracia also knew that until recently, Riza Hawkeye had gone missing. It had to have been hard for him to lose two loved ones. Gracia could see the sorrow that laced Jean's eyes. She could see the tears that wanted to pour from his ocean colored eyes, and she could also see the pride in his chest that kept those tears from sliding down his cheek.

Havoc tried to think of something else to tell Gracia, but he didn't know much about her. Usually he cut Hughes off before he could get into detail about their romance. Jean regretted it now, standing next to the only person on earth who loved Maes Hughes as much as he did.

A fellow soldier with the Nazi insignia on his jacket tapped Havoc on his shoulder just as Jean placed a single yellow rose on Hughe's coffin. "Sir, your car is waiting at the front."

"Thank you, officer." Havoc turned his attention to Gracia. He had seen her once before. She was always full of life and color. Seeing her in her black mourner's clothes made her seem out of place, as if she were merely playing dress up. "It's not much, Gracia, but the German forces would love to accommodate your needs, if any should arise."

Gracia forced a smile, "Thank you, Havoc, but I refuse to accept any charity from an organization that simply extends it because I'm German as well. Why not trying to accommodate the Jews?" Gracia turned away, signaling Havoc that the conversation was over.

My hands float up above me / And you whisper you love me / And I begin to fade / Into our secret place / The music makes me sway / The angels singing say we are alone with you / I am alone and they are too with you / I'm alive / I'm alive
The Elric's Home
Riza Hawkeye awoke in a daze. All the moments that seemed to come at her like lightning blended together into a giant blur of white hot light that stung her eyes and frazzled her brain. That other part of her mind that was always worried about where she was and where this Jean person was, was still asleep, leaving her a chance to ponder over everything. Her dreams had been so strange. She couldn't quite piece them together. All the dream people haunted her. Usually, unknown people in a dream just sort of existed with no real appearance that she could recollect, but these ones were so real to her.

She silently stepped down the stairs into the living room where Edward was waiting with Alphonse and Leni for Dr. Dodd. When she entered the room, the three others quickly got to their feet, ready to assist her to a seating position if need be. "How'd you sleep?" Leni asked.

"I had such strange dreams," Riza replied.

Edward could tell from the tone in her voice who he was talking to. It was the familiar Riza, the manageable Riza. "You wanna talk about it?" he questioned while helping her sit beside him on his couch.

Riza scratched her head a little. "There were these men. They were all in uniform. And one of them, he called me Riza. Is that my name?"

"Actually," Leni began, "It's the name for any scientific mystery, named after the famous scientist Phillip Rizaenhellstein, who discovered the first volcano rock." Riza nodded, but was sure that she didn't understand. Edward simply sat with his jaw open. How the hell did she remember that! "But, I suppose you could keep the name if you'd like."

Al was more interested in Riza's dream. "Men in uniforms? Were they blue?" Riza nodded. "Was one of them about seven feet tall, really big, and sparkly?"

Leni raised her eyebrow at the notion of a sparkly man. But Riza nodded enthusiastically, "Yes. But he wasn't the one who called me Riza. The one who called me Riza had black hair. He was…so…handsome." As Riza described what Al and Ed knew was Colonel Mustang, they could hear the longing in her voice. "He had these dark eyes as well, but they weren't harsh. He didn't say anything but Riza, but his eyes told me that we knew each other. They were…a lover's eyes." Riza started giggling as she finished, "Oh God, I sound so silly. Do I know these men? I feel like I know them."

Alphonse had been happy to explain the characters from her dreams to her, "Those were your friends, Riza. But I don't know why you're thinking about them. They're on the other side of the…umm…Well, the big guy was Alex Armstrong. He was a friend of ours. And the blonde one with the cigarette, that's Jean Havoc, he's a loveless desperate moron…I mean…he's a good guy. And the dark haired guy was Colonel Must…" Edward jabbed Al hard in the side. "What?"

Edward gave his little brother a stern look and said out of the side of his mouth, "We'll talk about it later."

Before Riza could question Al about the raven haired man, there was a knock at the door.

"That's probably my dad," Leni said in her regular cheery voice. She bobbed over to the front door and opened it. As Leni suspected, Dr. Dodd was standing at the door with his white coat and stethoscope around his neck.

Everyone inside could hear the sound of a motor running outside. "Sweetie, we don't have a lot of time. There are a lot of things we need to discuss with this Ms. Hawkeye here," Dr. Dodd stated. It was obvious that he was in a real hurry.

"Ms. Hawkeye?" Leni asked.

Dr. Dodd sent a glare over to Al and Ed. "Yes, Ms. Riza Hawkeye. So much for the late Phillip Rizaenhellstein." How did people remember that! "If you'll excuse me men."

Riza smiled serenely at Edward and his little brother. She felt like she could almost remember them. They were young and hopeful with their amber eyes and blonde hair. She thought maybe they had been friends at one point, which is why she leaned in and hugged each of them, "Thanks for everything, Edward, Alphonse. I hope I get to see you again sometime. Maybe I'll be a little more put together then. I'm sorry we couldn't talk more."

Al hugged her back. He remembered hugging her one time before. She had been glad to see he survived their last fight with the homunculi, and she couldn't help herself. Al wondered if when she hugged him she thought of the same moment. "Of course we'll talk again, Lieutenant." Ed nudged Al again in the ribcage. "Ow, I mean Riza."

And so I cry / The light is white / And I see you
Central Headquarters
Roy strolled into the office late in the afternoon. Winry's trial had been a quick case to try when both the jury and the judge were on the payroll of the country's top billionaires. She was sentenced to three weeks in a correctional facility and two weeks of community service. And Roy was left to wonder what had happened to make such a beautiful innocent like Winry Rockbell go wrong. Pinako had been at the trial. As her granddaughter was escorted out by military personnel, Pinako let out a deep sigh of disappointment. When Winry first told her that she wanted to move out of their quaint little home, Pinako had been skeptic, which was one of the reasons she rented out the apartment across the street. She wanted to make sure her granddaughter wasn't getting into too much trouble. Through her blinds, she watched as her pride and joy had turned into something else, something awful. She knew Winry missed the Elrics, and that she hadn't been the same since they left, but everyone else went on, why couldn't Winry?

The office was quiet. All of the men sat at their respected desks either pretending to do work because Roy had entered or just sitting with their heads on the table. There was no use beating around the bush for those dogs of the military, it was a slow day if you were a subordinate. They saluted Roy when he came in, but that was the most movement they had, had all day.

When Roy entered his office, he found Havoc sitting at his desk doodling on scrap piece of paper with a dull pencil from his desk. Ashes had piled up on top of the paper, and the cigarette that sat poised on his bottom lip was down to the filter. Havoc was in a complete daze. Before Havoc even heard the click of the door shutting, Roy had snuck up behind him and snatched up his drawing. "Havoc, I didn't know you were an artist," Roy said with a chuckle, but he quickly silenced himself when he took a better look at the picture. He had seen her before. She had been in his dreams ever since the incident at the Sugiyama's. Long blonde hair. Great smooth skin. Deep amber eyes. Succulent lips begging to be kissed. "Who is she?" Roy demanded.

Havoc snatched the drawing back from his commanding officer. "She's my dream girl. Not a night has gone by since that Sugiyama sting where I haven't dreamt of her. Just last night, I had a dream that she was your assistant. Fuery brought in a dog, I wanted to eat it, but she took it instead. Then you came in and started singing."

Roy's left eyebrow slowly raised to his hairline, "Wow, Havoc, that's some dream."

"I also had a dream while I was napping a few hours ago. I met her at our graduation from the academy. She attended the girl's academy. That's how she ended up your subordinate. She was happy to meet me. She said you talked about me in your letters. Then, you two met up, and she punched you in the face."

"I don't know what's harder to believe," Roy began, "me singing about dogs or you meeting a girl."

Havoc continued his drawing. It was finished, but his pencil still traced over the lines as if he hadn't drawn them in the first place. "Well, either way, she's been in my head every second."

I'm alive / I'm alive
Munich Hospital
Once Riza was done explaining all that she could remember, Dr. Dodd switched off his tape recorder. The reel-to-reel tape recorder had been given by an officer hoping to catch Jews coming in the hospital. True, the hospital had been a neutral zone for the Jewish people, but Dodd needed the money, and the German military forces paid a pretty penny for a Jew, and if you could prove it, say by recording a confession, the reward was great. At the moment, Dodd was using his machine to record Riza's tale. He was to turn it into Colonel Jean Havoc as soon as he could. It was common knowledge that dating within the military was frowned upon, making Jean's and Riza's relationship more physical than emotional. When moments arose when the two could be alone, there was never any time for talking, they simply said what they could in between sex, before heading out on another mission. However, Jean did care for Riza, which was why he had been so concerned about her condition.

Dodd's actions that followed Riza's confession were strictly for his own quest for knowledge. "The woman who gave you that cut, Julia Kimblee," Dodd began, "is not dead. One of the officers that dragged her 'dead' body out, Maes Hughes, secretly brought her to one of the Jewish hideouts on the north side of town. He was going to set up a secret meeting between her and the Elric's to discuss alchemy. Unfortunately, Maes Hughes died just recently. Take this." Before Riza had anytime to question Dodd's allegations, he pressed a piece of paper with an address into her hand. "Let your curiosity overpower your sense duty."

"What exactly do you mean?" Riza asked.

"It wouldn't be fair to turn in these Jews. Maes made it a priority to keep Julia safe because of her knowledge; I implore you to do the same." Riza could sense pleading in his tone.

"And you?" she inquired.

Dodd chuckled a little and pulled out the tape from his machine. With a black marker he signed Riza's name and the date at the top. Then, he slipped it into a manila envelope addressed to Jean Havoc. Later, he would bring it to the Nazi's central headquarters in exchange for his pay. "I am heavily rewarded for bringing the names of the Jews. But no amount of money can sway my desire for knowledge."

I can feel you all around me / Thickening the air I'm breathing / Holding on to what I'm feeling / Savoring this heart that's healing
Central Headquarters
Jean had already gone home, and Roy remained as the lone Fuhrer. The paperwork was once again piled on his desk almost to the point of overflow. He longed for an assistant that could keep him in line, but Havoc was almost as lax as he was. In fact, Havoc's paperwork was about at the same level. From Roy's chair, he could see that most of Havoc's paperwork were either tattooed with doodles of his new dream girl, covered in his drool, covered in his cigarette ashes, or labeled with almost hieroglyphic symbols which Roy knew to be Havoc's 'left handed signature.' The memory of Havoc trying to convince the staff that he had been ambidextrous floated through Roy's brain. No, Havoc was not ambidextrous, and the building request that had been defiled with what looked like a backwards J leaning on a spiral that wiggled toward a giant H and a few dots was proof.

Roy glanced at the clock, 2:30AM. There was no way he was chancing walking home now. The fatigue that plagued his body was just too powerful. He could already imagine himself finally keeling over in a gutter just steps away from his apartment complex. Roy did not look forward to sleeping the night in a smelly flea infested gutter riddled with dog urine and who knew what else. So, instead, he pulled off his jacket and balled it up on his desk. After switching off his desk lamp, he laid his head on his makeshift pillow and tried to rest.

The sound of Havoc's voice resounded in his brain. I met her at our graduation from the academy. She attended the girl's academy. That's how she ended up your subordinate. She was happy to meet me. She said you talked about me in your letters. Then, you two met up, and she punched you in the face.

It had been Havoc's dream, but the images danced around in Roy's mind as if they had been his memories.

Take my hand / I give it to you / Now you own me, all I am / You said you would never leave me / I believe you / I believe
Eastern Headquarters Men's Militant Academy
It was graduation night for both the men and women's academy. So, it was customary that the two schools get together for a dance before the diplomas were formally handed out in front of parents and friends. Havoc looked down at his two left feet. Damn, he thought, if only I could be ambidextrous with my feet too! The girls that littered the dance floor were of two varieties: 1) Very pretty and out of his league 2) Very unattractive and looked like they could kick his ass. That mixed with the fact that he couldn't dance his way out of a wet paper bag all added up to him having one lonely graduation night. His best friend Mustang; however, was already knee deep in lonely graduates just looking to finish off their academy experience by losing their virginity to a hot cadet. It was common knowledge that if you didn't get laid graduation night, you were a loser, so the women were all a hunt looking for the guy who would make them a woman.

Maria Ross turned to her closest of friends and whispered, "Riza, just pick one who is decent looking and get out of here. I don't want to be the friend of the girl who dashed the academy's only tradition."

Riza blushed from just listening to Maria's sinful request. It wasn't like grabbing a piece of cake at the cafeteria line. Riza couldn't just snatch up the first one she saw and move out of the way so her fellow cadets could have theirs. If she was going to follow out with her plans, it had to be the right man. She scanned the room for Mr. Right, but came up empty handed. All the good looking men were already taken, and believe it or not, most of the unattractive men had been taken as well. But one stood out. He was blonde. He was blue eyed. He was tall. He was lean. He was cute. But most of all…he was pathetic. It wasn't hard for Riza to tell that he had been the runt of the litter that compiled his troupe. He stood apart from the group just watching, like a dog watches traffic, waiting to cross the street. Poor guy. If the night went as planned, Riza could see herself killing two birds with one stone: giving the pitiful boy some company and following through with graduation tradition.

Jean pulled a cigarette from his coat pocket. His captain had given each of the boys one to celebrate their graduation. It would have been a cigar, but the cigars had been rationed due to the Ishbalan uprising. However, smoking a cigarette seemed like the only cool thing Havoc could do at the time. But of course, he didn't have a light. He wasn't going to ask the two gentlemen smooching their respected dates on either side of him, that was just foul play to interrupt a man during business. Instead, he checked his pockets as if there were a match there.

Before Jean could make a bigger ass of himself by resorting to lighting his cigarette with rocks, the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen took a seat next to him and handed him a match. Jean fought off the urge to take out a marker and etch MINE all over her before any of the single men could claim her. She had the must beautiful shade of amber eyes he had ever seen. And her skin was so smooth that he imagined if he touched her he would leave finger prints on her. Her hair was a stunning hue of blonde. She was like a Greek statue. Her features were cut so magnificently, but so softly. Then, as if too assure him that she was in fact a living creature, she spoke, "Hi, I'm Riza Hawkeye."

Jean looked down at the match she had offered. She hadn't handed him a book of matches, thus supplying him with something to light the match with. He remembered how his captain used to light matches. He angrily swiped it across the forehead of his cadets who were misbehaving. Then, he coolly brought the match over to his cigarette. Once the cigarette was lit, he'd inhale slowly until the tip glowed red. Lastly, to prove his manliness, he dug the match into his skin without flinching. Yeah, captain was badass, Jean thought to himself.

In an effort to exude the same badass-ery, Jean took the match and flicked it across Riza's forehead. The match, of course, did not strike, leaving Havoc to stew in his embarrassment and stupidity. Riza snatched the match away from him. The pause that followed gave the blood in Jean's face ample time to boil over and cause his cheeks to turn a terrifying shade of red. "You idiot," she said through a laugh. "This is how you pull that off." Coyly, she mirrored Jean's actions and scraped the match across his cheek. Jean felt a sharp sting where the match had trailed which was then replaced by a light heat brought on by the matches' soft flame. Riza held the match out in front of him as a sort of peace offering. She didn't mean for the gesture to be rude or condescending; she was just trying to help.

It didn't take Jean long to realize that he had never smoked a cigarette before. He put the match up to the cigarette and inhaled slowly like his captain, but found the taste to be disgusting and nauseating. That's about when he looked down and noticed he lit the cigarette backwards and was smoking the filter. But, being the showboat he was, he was determined to follow through. He took the still lit match and grasped it in his bare palm. Riza smiled at him. She could tell he was trying his hardest to impress her. In her head, she counted: One…two…three… "God, that's hot!" Jean shouted while tossing the burnt match toward the wall.

Riza pulled the cigarette from his lips and put it out in the palm off her hand. Badass, Jean thought. "You can cough now, I've already called your bluff."

"Thanks!" Jean turned his head away and began a series of gut wrenching coughs. He swore then and there he would never smoke again. He didn't know, at that moment, his father had saw him from across the room light up a smoke. That night, his father would make him smoke ten packs of cigarettes in an attempt to teach him a lesson, but all it did was create a life long addiction that Jean would never be able to fight off.

"What's your name?" Riza asked.

Her voice sounded like angels in his ears. "I'm Hean Javoc…I mean Jean Havoc."

Riza laughed as soon as she remembered the name, "I know you! You're Roy's friend." Good ol' Roy, Jean said in his head, you put in a good word for your best of buddies. "You split your pants doing squats in formation once, right?" Roy, you bastard!

"How do you know Roy?" Havoc inquired, trying to shift the subject from his embarrassing incident.

"Girlfriend." Cupid's arrow had gone straight to the heart, but with an unintended fatal blow. But just as Love's Gates closed, a ray of hope shined through from the heavens, "I mean I was his girlfriend. He broke up with me…through a letter…the bastard. He couldn't even tell me in person. If he were he right now…I would…urg!"

Oh God, there was still hope! "You know what you should do? Sleep with his best friend." Smooth, Havoc, smooth.

"I don't know, I think Maes has a girlfriend." There wasn't a hint of jest in her voice, meaning that Roy hadn't ever mentioned Havoc as being his best friend. Tonight was not going to be his night. "Actually, though, for the sake of tradition, I was thinking you and I could get out of here." Riza couldn't even believe those words had come from her mouth. Ross was a terrible influence. Riza prayed that Ross would grow out of that playgirl attitude, especially if she was going to be in the military.

"Yes!" Before Riza could get in another word, Jean hooked his arm into hers and led her towards the French doors that paved the way to his manhood. "And from now until we're both no longer virgins, let's not talk. I don't want to say or be prompted to say anything that might talk you out of this. Oh, and so you don't have to ask when we get up there, I'm both rash and STD free. That's not a turn off is it?" Riza did the hand motions for zipping her lips. Jean nodded and smiled, "Cool."

And then, as if Satan himself had crawled up from the underworld and bitch slapped Jean in his post pubescent face, who should exit through the same door Jean and Riza had been utilizing? Roy Mood Killer Mustang. "Riza?" Roy asked with stun in his voice. Last time he heard she had been on her way to some ritzy college up north to pursue a career in medicine. Little did he know that after his break up letter, Riza set off to prove herself as a woman by defying a male dominated world and becoming a dog of the military. Before any more words could be exchanged, a lead heavy fist slammed right between Roy's eyes. "I take it your still mad," he called after her. Roy's date, a girl that the rest of her troupe simply acknowledged as Big Boobs McGee, rushed to his side to check if he was hurt.

Meanwhile, Riza raced out to the courtyard with Havoc trailing behind her. The stupid high heels that she had been forced to wear made it hard to run much further in the grass, so she plopped down on the stone bench and looked up toward the night sky.

Havoc breathlessly took a spot next to her. His lungs had still been coated with god knows what from his first cigarette. "Riza," he began, but she put a finger to his lip to quiet him. Then, Havoc laid his one night stand on the table along with his chance at ever losing his virginity, and stepped into what all men knew to be the Friend Zone. Instead of tilting Riza's head and lowering his lips to hers, he took pity on the tear soaked faced that sat before him and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. Before Riza could fight off her sadness, her tears came pouring down from her eyes in streams, soaking Havoc's rental tux. "I know, he's kind of a dick."

Riza smiled up at him. "He couldn't even tell me in person, Jean. And I thought I got the last word when I never sent a letter back…but…I don't think I'm over him. I'm sorry, I know this isn't what you planned for tonight, but would you mind just staying with me."

Jean let out a deep sigh, releasing whatever left over feelings of lust he still had for Riza. "No problem." So much for tradition.

I can feel you all around me / Thickening the air I'm breathing / Holding on to what I'm feeling / Savoring this heart that's healed."

-- Flyleaf

Another chapter down! Pleeeeeeease review. For the love of small ugly dog, please review! I know you're still sweating the lack of Roy x Riza, but do not lose faith, my loves, for I shall bless this story soon. Besides, I think I made it up to you with comedy in this chapter and the last one. And I'm sorry, but I friggen love how pathetic Havoc is. I just wanna take him home and snuggle with him! Okay...enough of that. REVIEW! SMALL UGLY DOG! HAVOC SNUGGLES!