Undercover 12

"Omigod, I am positive I felt the baby move." I don't know why I was talking aloud. There was noone in the shower but me….and Muffin, who, after all, is 'the baby' in question. I jumped out of the shower and ran, dripping wet to the telephone. "Mary Lou? I think I felt the baby move."

"Wonderful. Is that all you need? I'm sorta busy." Oh, God. They're having sex. She is never chatty when they are having sex. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know."

"It's Tuesday night. 9:45. You can set your watch by it. Talk to you tomorrow." She sang.

Okay. Well. Hmmm. I go see Morelli in a week in Detroit. He'll be more interested in this news. In the meantime, I'll call my mother. "Mom? Guess what? I'm positive I felt the baby move."

"Wonderful. Is that all you need? I'm a little busy." Oh…my…God. This is my mother…she's almost certainly with my father. They should not be having sex. Euwww. I hung up before even saying goodbye.

"Lula? Guess what? I think I felt the baby move." I had to tell somebody or I was going to die.

"That's nice. I'll see you tomorrow." She hung up. I was positive Tank was there, probably with his head between her thighs. I am SO LONELY! I am the only person on the face of the earth not having sex right at this moment. I NEED JOE! Crap. I know, Joe's mother – she's not married, I've never seen her date, maybe I'll call over there…..no answer. She's probably in bed early…all alone. I sighed heavily.

I went downstairs. For the first time tonight I realized the light on the answering machine was blinking. I checked the messages, "Hello? Uh, my name is Jake Murphy. I live in Yuma, Arizona. I think I may have your dog. This telephone number was on his collar. He is starving. I've never seen a dog eat so much. This dog looks sort of like a golden retriever or maybe an Irish setter, if you stretch it a little. Give me a call." He had left his number.

"How could Bob be in Yuma, Arizona?" I asked Rex. He didn't look convinced. I checked the time. It is 10 pm here, but only 8 in Arizona. Okay, nothing ventured, nothing gained. "Mr. Murphy? This is Stephanie Morelli in New Jersey. You left a message about a dog?"

"Damndest thing I ever saw." He said. This dog will eat anything. We own a restaurant. He's a damn good garbage disposal. Did you say 'New Jersey'? How the hell do you think he got here?"

Unconvinced, "I need to make sure it is Bob. Try feeding him a carrot."

"Oh, Okay. I haven't found anything this bad boy won't eat, so I figure he'll be happy to have a carrot. If I give them to him, I won't have to eat the damn things, so here goes……shit, he turned his damn nose up. He won't eat them."

I instantly cried, "BOB! IT'S BOB!"

"How do you think he got here?" My Murphy asked.

"I don't know and I don't care. I need Bob home with me. How can we get him here?" I didn't care what it cost, it was obviously Bob and I needed him home.

"Well, I reckon I can ship him, maybe. I'll need to buy one of those big dog crates. I'll call you tomorrow and let you know what it will run you. Do you have an email address? I can send you a picture so you can be sure this is really your dog?" I gave him the address, although I knew it was Bob.

"Thank goodness you found him. Thank you so much for calling!" I'd completely dissolved in tears by this point and was thrilled Bob was coming home.

Again, I must say, my life is wonderful! I have a husband who adores me – he said so himself. I am having a really nice baby that I think I really like – we seem companionable to this point. He doesn't mind my issues. I don't mind his….I think he's moving again. Either that or I have gas.

One more try…"Dunphy, Guess what? I have the best news for you! I am certain I felt the baby move and I think Bob's coming home from Arizona!" I was so excited I had to tell someone.

"Wonderful. Is that all you need? I'm sorta busy." Shit. I just hung up. It's not my night. Seems to be everyone else in the world's damn night.

"Okay, Mary Lou, It's official. None of my clothes fit me. I've only gained 8 pounds, but I can't get into anything. I guess I've been wearing my clothes tight – seems like it should take more than 8 pounds to keep you out of your clothes. I need everything. Lingeree especially." She was looking at me very speculatively. In way of explanation, I said, "I may have a trip coming up soon that is important to me." I responded, with my eyebrows knitted together.

"Okay, so let's say that Officer Hottie was there to meet your airplane," I told you she knew. "What would you want him to see? To focus on?"

"Well, I'm sure he won't be there to meet me at the airplane. I'm sure I will need to go apprehend him at his new place…. You know? I mean I haven't seen him in a couple of months, and the landscape has changed a bit….How do I accentuate the good part?" I was trying to be vague and still understand how to get Morelli's motor started.

"Okay, you need to understand, Joe will be damned pleased with any changes in your body that he can attribute to his own dick. Guys are pretty damned proud of what they can do to us. I don't care if you have gained 100 pounds and it is all in your ass. He is going to see it and go, 'Damn, she loves me.' That's just the way it is. However, it only works when you are pregnant or when you are wearing 4 inch Fuck-Me Pumps."

Mary Lou has three kids and had told me they were striving for 4. "I need you to answer some questions for me before we can outfit you appropriately. How long will you have together? Does he like lingerie? Do you need an outfit to go out with him or will this strictly be an intimate affair?"

"Um, maybe 3 days, Yeah, but more on the floor than on me, and maybe – can't hurt to be ready for the unexpected." I replied.

"Okay, I know just the place." She took me to a sort of a crummy little strip mall which had as the anchor store a place called, appropriately, "Bun in the Oven." She seemed pleased with herself.

We went inside. "Omigod. I had no idea." This was a smut shop for pregnant women. Well, not everything, I mean, they had nice clothes, too, but it was predominantly lingerie and really 'exciting' fashions to celebrate the 'special' time in a woman's life.

"I'm telling you, he will LOVE it." She smiled knowingly and winked at me.

Most of the things here accentuated the bust, and allowed filmy, sexy, fabric to drape over my protruding tummy. I found about 45 outfits I thought Joe would like immediately. I picked out about 10, along with two week's worth of smutty undergarments and sleepwear. I was still hoping to have him home for at least part of this interesting time in our lives. If not, I would be able to share it with him next time around. I still believed with all my heart that we'd have more than one child. I had been so happy despite the miserable circumstances; I couldn't imagine not wanting to do it again when he was with me.

I left the shop with slacks, skirts, tops, jeans, t-shirts, maternity gowns, nursing bras, sexy little nighties and peek a boo panties. I was ready to see my husband. NOW. I didn't know if I could wait for a week.

Thanks to the twice weekly workouts, I had a butt you could bounce a quarter off of and a handful of notes from the man who had declared his love to me. The more recent ones were urgent and insistent, mentioning the unmentionable. Not exactly baby book material. He was almost as ready to see me as I was to see him.

The next thing I knew, I had 61 red X's on my calendar and knew I would see Joe in less than two days. Bob had arrived at the Trenton airport last night, happy and hungry. I was so glad he was home. I'd practically rubbed the fur off of him in the last 14 hours and was taking today off to spend with the sweet little furry guy. Rex was thrilled Bob was home. I could tell. Muffin was being very acrobatic and I knew he was happy, too. It was a great day.

Bob slept with his head on my lap and when Muffin kicked him in the face, Bob just licked my face. I took this as a sign that all was going to work out. I was unbelievably happy.

However, I was due to see the Doctor again in the morning for a sonogram and I was a little nervous. I don't really know why. I felt great. I guess I was still nervous about how Joe would feel about my budding body even though Mary Lou had reassured me that he would love it.

When I went to see Doctor Hands, he said I'd gained another 5 pounds and was, again, doing fine. Muffin was getting bigger. The sonogram was amazing. I could see Muffin's head, legs, arms, face and feet. You could even see him sucking his thumb. Of course, the 'him' part was still totally speculative considering that 'he' wouldn't move his legs for us to see if there was anything between them or not. Dr. Hands handed me a video and a few still picture from the sonogram to share with Joe. I absolutely knew Joe would be thrilled.

Dunphy drove me to the airport that morning. He reminded me that Joe and Terri's place had been bugged and that Takata and his goons could hear anything we said but they couldn't see anything as they had installed no video surveillance. I was happy about that. Crap. What would have happened to the separate but equal porn idea if they had installed video surveillance? I didn't want to know.

I rented a car and followed the directions I had printed from the internet yesterday. I arrived at Joe's slummy apartment just on schedule. It was October now, so it was a bit chilly outside. I was wearing a long sleeved black peasant blouse that was tightly gathered around my ample bosom and draped attractively over my tiny little baby bump. My jeans I was wearing were slim fit to the knees with a bit of a flare. I also had sexy high heeled black boots on. I didn't care if I had to apprehend Joe. I was going to look good doing it. I had a little black swing coat that bit me just below the butt, but I didn't think I needed it. It wasn't that cool outside. My hair was perfect, falling in ringlets around my face, just like Joe liked.

I parked at the curb and marched myself to the door where I lifted my hand to knock. Suddenly a grimy looking hand appeared from the inside of the apartment and dragged me through the doorway. I was startled when a long haired, dirty looking, bearded man confronted me inside the apartment. I let out a little shriek.

This guy was…Morelli. I realized it almost too late. He put an arm up to keep me from hitting him in the face with my purse. I hadn't seen him in 63 days. He said that he would look the part of a drug addict. He was right. He looked like he hadn't bathed in that amount of time. He looked like he would smell bad, but he smelled like Joe.

He was smiling at me, and had his index finger to his mouth reminding me that our every sound was being monitored. Terri was lounging on the sofa in the little living room in a little navy blue halter top and a pair of short shorts, accentuated by her own slut shoes. She was also holding an impressive looking gun. She didn't look nearly as happy to see me as he did.

He pulled me into his chest, and said, "Hey, what are you doing here?"

He simultaneously pulled a neatly printed index card out of his pocket that said, "I am so happy to see you." He was grinning at me. Even under all that hair, I could tell he was gorgeous and the beating a couple of months ago hadn't hurt him a bit.

I responded weakly, "You missed your court date. I need to take you back to Trenton so you can be rebonded."

"No way! I'm not going anywhere with you, you stupid bitch." He said. The card in his hand said, "You are more beautiful than ever. I love you."

I guess I'm more verbal than visual and I responded to the tone of his voice. "Listen, you dumb fuck. You knocked me up and then left. The least you can do is come with me peacefully."

I was looking around this dismal space Joe and Terri had been sharing. It was a very small living area that boasted a sofa, currently occupied by Terri, an elliptical machine just like I'd seen at the gym, a Bowflex, and a huge dry – erase board that they had been writing notes to each other on. I could see a kitchen in the back of the space that was small and clean. There was one door to the left and I assumed it led to the bedroom and bathroom.

"I'm not going," Joe said, waggling his eyebrows at me, and holding up a card that said, "Let's get out of here, Beautiful."

"Oh, yeah?" How original, I thought. What the hell? He should have given me a script of something?

He strode in long steps to the white board and wrote the word "handcuffs."

I did a palms up gesture…. I didn't bring any handcuffs! Stupid! Shit! Terri was laughing, stupid girl.

Morelli put his hands to his forehead. "How do you think you are going to take me in?"

He took off toward the bedroom. I followed him. He was digging around in what appeared to be Terri's underwear drawer due to the fact that each piece of fabric he was flinging through the air was about two square inches in totality. Much to my chagrin, he pulled out a pair of handcuffs and handed them to me. I didn't want to know why they were there, why he knew they were there, or why I felt so relieved they were there.

"I'm going to handcuff you?" I said, more as a question than as a statement or declaration.

I noticed there were pictures taped to the mirror of Joe and Terri, from the time they were about 15. They were in various stages of dress, undress and costume. I must admit I was starting to get rattled. There was a whiteboard in this room, too, with various notes written on it about who was going to shower first, etc. I wrote, 'keys'. I didn't want to cuff him and not be able to let him out. He showed me the keys were in his pocket. I REALLY didn't want to know why the keys to Terri's underwear drawer handcuffs were in Joe's pocket.

Joe waved his hands in the air and pointed at his eyes. He was telling me to focus. "I'm going to handcuff you!" I said, very convincingly.

He sort of rolled his eyes and grimaced.

I could hear Terri laughing aloud from the living room.

Joe presented his hands behind his back and I cuffed him.

On the way out of the apartment, he kicked a few things over, cursed a lot in Italian and stuck his tongue out at Terri who sent him a big smoochy kiss as we were walking to my rental car. I took just a moment on the way out to write on the white board, "Terri, you could use some time on the thigh master." on the dry-erase board.

I was supposed to present him to a contact at the Detroit PD for transportation to Trenton and they were to smuggle him to me offsite after that.

We followed the plan. I was delivered to a nice little house that was stocked for us. Roses on the coffee table, and Boston Crème's in the kitchen told me that Joe was coming here to meet me soon.

I waited…and waited…and waited.